Greg Sanders, CSI
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Well, I must admit a slight taste for old cheddar, but well, there's a slight problem that any cheese I try to eat tastes a bit like rancid blood. Grissom keeps leaving stuff in the staff fridge.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
*shudders* Barney. With an axe. There's no way that creepy purple dinosaur should be allowed to walk around near children.
3. What time is it where you are?
Way too early. 5 pm is not a time I should be awake.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Well, as Dumbledore mind, not as me at all, it would have to be Snape. There's just something about mixing concoctions together that is really sexually attractive, and it would have to involve a late night potion making session. You know, hot, bubbling liquids that have to be scraped off the body that taste good. But that would only be if I was Dumbledore.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
I don't want to be in Gryffindor, running into the middle of stupidity isn't my thing, but definitely George. Harry and George share a stronger bond then Fred, it would end up being a Romulus and Remus thing for sure.
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
It's there for you to make paper airplanes with. You can throw them at people coming into the office, right? Maybe that's just what I use paperwork for, but it really is a good reason for all that paper to keep appearing. Then if anyone comes near your desk you can keep throwing the airplanes at them.
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
See, I'm a nice guy and I know stuff. Wait this isn't helping. But really, Hufflepuffs are useless in their own way, nice people there, just kind of hang around.
Fine. They're here to prove that not everyone is an asshole.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
Well, I can do a personalized DNA profile for you all, you know, make it really interesting and tell you all about your *cough* genetic condition. How's that sound? *eyebrow arch*