"Oooh, a thing who kills things!" This observation was not godmoddy only because the Sorting Hat was the Sorting Hat, and it could be assumed that the Sorting Hat somehow knew what a Cyberdyne Systems Series 1000 advanced prototype was, by virtue of its Hatly wisdom and nosiness and magic. You know.
"Well, we already disposed of the Canadian Weasley Bear," chirped the Sorting Hat - blithely taking credit for everyone else's work; in truth, the Hat had been safe behind locks and wards for the full duration of the CWB invasion, with the commander of its Hatsguard ordered to guard the door. "What other things might you be able to crush for us? DO NOT SAY SOFTDRINK CANS. OR BEER CANS. We wizards do not drink out of cans!"
He'd already been told -- warned? -- about the Hat being a literal talking hat, but he still registered some surprise when finally confronted by the headgear in question. Who seemed to know more than it ought, but after everything he'd learnt during his Sorting, he didn't find this to be a cause for great concern. Supposedly very few potential students had been turned away after being interrogated at length... the odds were in his favour.
"Probably anything tangible that you think requires crushing," he replied conversationally, taking the request literally. And it would not occur to him that he was being treated like a glorified trash compactor. "Not limited to bears or aluminum cans," he added with no trace of irony.
He hesitated, debating whether he was capable of such a thing. He knew exceedingly little about this strange new world that he was stranded in, and hadn't yet been able to gauge the extent of power that these witches and wizards wielded -- much less anything to do with their personalities. The talking dog had offered only a brief demonstration of "magic"...
"That might be beyond my abilities," he eventually answered. "How would you propose I do this?"
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"Well, we already disposed of the Canadian Weasley Bear," chirped the Sorting Hat - blithely taking credit for everyone else's work; in truth, the Hat had been safe behind locks and wards for the full duration of the CWB invasion, with the commander of its Hatsguard ordered to guard the door. "What other things might you be able to crush for us? DO NOT SAY SOFTDRINK CANS. OR BEER CANS. We wizards do not drink out of cans!"
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"Probably anything tangible that you think requires crushing," he replied conversationally, taking the request literally. And it would not occur to him that he was being treated like a glorified trash compactor. "Not limited to bears or aluminum cans," he added with no trace of irony.
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"That might be beyond my abilities," he eventually answered. "How would you propose I do this?"
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Welcome to Hufflepuff!
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