Dante (Devil May Cry) Application
"What the hell?" was the first words that came from the white haired, blue eyed demon hunter. Twin pistols, one black and one white were kept in holsters at the back of his long, red jacket, near the holster where he kept his sword. The sword had a skeleton torso and skull at the hilt, and looked...demonic looking.
"Where am I?" he asked himself.
Near where he was, there was a table, with sheets of paper on it.
"Applications? Oh, you've got to be shitting me. What is the point of this? Why am I here?"
Looking around the room he was in, it was more of a hall, of stone with the large coloured tapestries.
"Certainly not my place" he sighed "Too clean"
He shot another look at the applications
"Alright" he relented "Let's just sell my soul and get this bloody thing over and done with"
He sat down on a chair that he hadn't noticed, picked up an application and a pen, that also happened to be near by with a fingerless-gloved hand. He slammed his boots onto the table, scattering applications, leaned back into his chair, and started to fill out the application:
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Cheese?
I dunno. I'm not a cheese connoiseur. I guess the cheese that goes on pizza. I don't what kind it is. I don't really care that much about cheese.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Barney there was always something about that giant purple dinosaur that got me. Don't ask me why, I just didn't like him.
3. What time is it where you are?
Night time. Business is slow. I guess business would be slow considering how specialised my field is
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Oh crap. You've got to be KIDDING me? Sexually harass? I don't know anyone in the Order of the Phoenix. Maybe one of the chicks I guess. But Lady of Trish might kill me if they find out I've been sexually harassing someone.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
I don't bartend. I kill demons for a living. I go to bars sometimes. I mean, there's this one bar that does a REALLY good strawberry sundae...
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Hehe. You're kidding right? I know there was some weird stuff like that going on in Roman mythology. Wait. I think it might have been Celtic. Argh who gives a shit about mythology anyway? Who are these people you are talking about?!
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Wow. Sucks to be you. Paperwork. I chuck my paperwork in a drawer to sort out later. Which I never do. That probably explains why I'm in so much debt all the time...
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
I am a demon hunter. I kill demons for a living, and I look pretty damn stylish when I kill them.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
Squib?
Well I don't have any items to give to you, but I can hunt and kill any demons bothering you for free...WAIT! I can give you Agni and Rudra, twin scimitars imbued with Flame and Wind. They talk...you could err...use them in experiments! Or something
"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG."Blah, blah, blah" ___Dante___
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. ___Dante___
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. '"O jeez. Reminds me of Elementary School. And political correctness"___Dante___
One day, marmalade will rule the world. Dante pauses. "Marmalade? Riiiiiight. Whatever"___Dante___
"Where am I?" he asked himself.
Near where he was, there was a table, with sheets of paper on it.
"Applications? Oh, you've got to be shitting me. What is the point of this? Why am I here?"
Looking around the room he was in, it was more of a hall, of stone with the large coloured tapestries.
"Certainly not my place" he sighed "Too clean"
He shot another look at the applications
"Alright" he relented "Let's just sell my soul and get this bloody thing over and done with"
He sat down on a chair that he hadn't noticed, picked up an application and a pen, that also happened to be near by with a fingerless-gloved hand. He slammed his boots onto the table, scattering applications, leaned back into his chair, and started to fill out the application:
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Cheese?
I dunno. I'm not a cheese connoiseur. I guess the cheese that goes on pizza. I don't what kind it is. I don't really care that much about cheese.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Barney there was always something about that giant purple dinosaur that got me. Don't ask me why, I just didn't like him.
3. What time is it where you are?
Night time. Business is slow. I guess business would be slow considering how specialised my field is
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
Oh crap. You've got to be KIDDING me? Sexually harass? I don't know anyone in the Order of the Phoenix. Maybe one of the chicks I guess. But Lady of Trish might kill me if they find out I've been sexually harassing someone.
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
I don't bartend. I kill demons for a living. I go to bars sometimes. I mean, there's this one bar that does a REALLY good strawberry sundae...
B. Gryffindor - Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Hehe. You're kidding right? I know there was some weird stuff like that going on in Roman mythology. Wait. I think it might have been Celtic. Argh who gives a shit about mythology anyway? Who are these people you are talking about?!
C. Ravenclaw - You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Wow. Sucks to be you. Paperwork. I chuck my paperwork in a drawer to sort out later. Which I never do. That probably explains why I'm in so much debt all the time...
D. Hufflepuff - Prove you are not useless.
I am a demon hunter. I kill demons for a living, and I look pretty damn stylish when I kill them.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
Squib?
Well I don't have any items to give to you, but I can hunt and kill any demons bothering you for free...WAIT! I can give you Agni and Rudra, twin scimitars imbued with Flame and Wind. They talk...you could err...use them in experiments! Or something
"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG."Blah, blah, blah" ___Dante___
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. ___Dante___
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. '"O jeez. Reminds me of Elementary School. And political correctness"___Dante___
One day, marmalade will rule the world. Dante pauses. "Marmalade? Riiiiiight. Whatever"___Dante___