XMas Gifts from Oly
I don't really have any reverence for the holiday, to be honest. I don't get how some kid born in a barn should cause everyone to spend way too much money on chochkes no one will ever appreciate. So I decide that, for the few gifts I want to give, I can go to one store.
A gift basket containing various candy in the shapes of female genitalia, in a variety of exciting shapes and colors, with a note reading: "Since you aren't getting any, I thought this might serve as a reasonable substitute. -Oly."
A life-sized blow-up doll with tentacles glued on at strategic points. The note reads: "It's the best I could do for a monster. Hope you like it."
Chocolate body paint, of course, and a large Santa made of dark chocolate. The card reads: "Mello, I know we only had the one conversation, but I remembered your love of chocolate. I hope you've got someone to share this with. Oly."
A gift basket containing various candy in the shapes of female genitalia, in a variety of exciting shapes and colors, with a note reading: "Since you aren't getting any, I thought this might serve as a reasonable substitute. -Oly."
A life-sized blow-up doll with tentacles glued on at strategic points. The note reads: "It's the best I could do for a monster. Hope you like it."
Chocolate body paint, of course, and a large Santa made of dark chocolate. The card reads: "Mello, I know we only had the one conversation, but I remembered your love of chocolate. I hope you've got someone to share this with. Oly."