Application for Kathryn Merteuil (Cruel Intentions)

[mlle_merteuil]

(( with the permission of Sebastian-mun, of course))

"Oh, Sebastian?" Kathryn had thought of one last thing. Just a little amuse-bouche, something to whet their appetites for what was to come. She'd only just sent him away with a syrup-sweet Happy hunting, but there was something about the way he'd snap back like a boomerang at her call --

Comments

[silk_simkin]

Because the mun is slack, he gives no reasons for Simkin to be in the sorting room. Of course, that's because it's Simkin, and he needs no reasons. He is where the fun is at.

As it was, he appeared in the Sorting Room, and smiled beatifically at the young girl in front of him. "Why hello, dear girl. Welcome to Hogwarts School of insanity and mischief."

[mlle_merteuil]

Hogwarts what? This definitely sounded like something Sebastian had made up.

But at least he'd hired a very attractive man to carry on the charade. Was it one of his friends, Kathryn wondered, or an actor? Maybe even a male stripper? There was very little she'd put past her step-brother.

"Insanity and mischief sounds about right," she agreed, without rancor, approaching and holding out a hand for him not to shake but to kiss.

[sidney_reilly]

Reilly watched the girl fill in the application with amusement. Interesting.

"Is that civilized wager private, or can anyone join in?"

He lit a cigarette, then offered the open case to Kathryn.

[mlle_merteuil]

Kathryn turned toward the unfamiliar voice. A dapper gentleman, maybe about as old as Sebastian's father. How many people did Sebastian get in on this, anyway? Maybe she had underestimated her step-brother...

"It's not so much private as, well, a kind of inside joke," she said innocently. "Thank you for offering, but I don't smoke. It's bad for your lungs, you know."

[sidney_reilly]

"I like to live dangerously," he said drily, and put the case away. Really, young people today. Such fogies!

"I see. Might I ask why you're so touchy about being called useless?" He nodded toward the form. "The Hufflepuff question, there. We all had to put up with it, you know."

[mlle_merteuil]

Kathryn very much agreed -- privately -- with the man's sentiment. Living dangerously was really the only way to live. In order to manage such a life, though, one had to maintain a precarious balance. Reputation was a tightrope, and there was no safety net. It wouldn't be surprising if Sebastian hoped somehow to entrap her into doing something indiscreet. He always did have that camera of his at hand, didn't he?

She toyed with the ornate cross pendant she wore -- the one whose hollow stem concealed a little vial of Peruvian flake -- and lifted her chin.

"No one likes to be called useless, do they? It's not very polite. Can I ask what you mean when you say you had to 'put up with it'?"

[fabernathy]

Francis had found himself significantly more charmed by Kathryn's broteher than he was by the lady herself. To be fair, he was probably predisposed to prefer Sebastian, with his boyish good looks and decidedly masculine charms, but she might have won him over all the same. Her snotty answers turned him off, however, and at the word fag his lips thinned into a hard, angry line.

"Another Valmont?" he asked icily. "My God, you're popping up like weeds. Is there a family reunion in town?"

[mlle_merteuil]

Bitch, please.

"I'm sorry," this in Kathryn's most saccharine tones, "I think you're mistaking me for someone else. I'm Kathryn Merteuil." Her mother married a Valmont, yes. It did not make her a Valmont.

... Family reunion?

"Why, are there Valmonts running around unchecked? Someone really ought to leash them. Muzzles optional but highly recommended."

[fabernathy]

Oh, was it on? Francis thought maybe it was on.

He put on his pince-nez and eyed the girl disdainfully, nostrils flaring. "Oh, I see. A Merteuil. How could I possibly have confused the two? My mistake. I met Sebastian earlier and I just assumed that the two of you must be related."

He subjected her to a long, considering look. "I'm not really sure why," he said finally, thoughful, declaring Sebastian's superiority with a cutting smile.

[mlle_merteuil]

"No, I really don't see how you could have made a mistake like that." Kathryn's nostrils flared ever so slightly, scenting eau de bitch. "But then, I don't believe we've met formally."

[wolfram_jyari]

"I am not your brother!" Wolfram announced, gravely offended.

[mlle_merteuil]

Kathryn sized up the lithe blond boy in what appeared to be a military school uniform.

"You're definitely not my brother," she declared.

[wolfram_jyari]

"Exactly, human." He often denied that Weller was his brother, although they shared the same blood. But in this case, the girl was obviously not related to him, being human entirely, and Wolfram had to make it clear.

He then glanced at her wristwatch. "And I am sorry for your loss. I suppose your battery must have been very important for you," the blond said solemnly.

[mlle_merteuil]

Kathryn blinked.

"Did you just refer to me as 'human'?"

Quiet over there in the peanut gallery.

[wee_free_men]

Okay, so I think we all know what this signifies. The mun is lazy, and cannot be bothered describing the multitudinous hordes of little blue men in kilts storming the Sorting Room.

Because really, this post comes down to one word, and one word only.

That word?

Is...

"CRIVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENS!"

[mlle_merteuil]

Kathryn took one look at the descending deluge of Smurf-like creatures and did what came naturally.

She jumped up on the nearest chair and shrieked.