Application - Zack Addy, from 'Bones'

[zacko_the_nerd]

((Permission granted by Hodgins!mun! And Bones!mun, obviously, because... that's me XD Zack's italicized things are his written responses.))There were two thoughts running through Zack Addy's head, for the time being, and he wasn't entirely sure which to focus on first. On the one hand... Oh, man, this castle was too cool. Intricate brickwork,

Comments

[buggy_genius]

Imagine the luck! His first time in the Sorting Room to collect bribes, and who should arrive but Zack. Hodgins was grinning like an idiot who was really into shadenfreude. "Zack! Oh man, you're going to love it here!" Especially trying to figure out how a hat talks... I can't wait to see this.

[zacko_the_nerd]

Hodgins! It was probably a good thing that Zack didn't recognize the sadistic nature to Hodgins' smile right off, because, well, he was already nervous enough about this school. Questions about murder and sexual harassment and he looked like he was expecting someone to jump out of the shadows and take him down at any moment.

He couldn't help himself. He needed to know. He grabbed at Hodgins' shoulders once he was close enough, eyes wide. "Is this a cult? Is Dr. Brennan dead? They're trying to get me to kill Barney, or possibly Carrottop. Not entirely sure on that matter, although they both could deserve some form of capital punishment." His gaze had grown vaguely thoughtful at that, eyes moving to the ceiling and... Right, focus, Zack. "Sexual harassment? What's going on?"

[buggy_genius]

"A cult? What are you--" Hm. To encourage this, or try and calm him down? Ah hell, Hodgins isn't a complete asshole. Usually. "Look, this isn't a cult. The application's a bit weird, yeah, and so's the rest of this place--except they've got a great library, and two bars--but it's not a cult. Dr. Brennan's fine, I just saw her the other day."

[zacko_the_nerd]

Zack only blinked to Hodgins, looking sufficiently calmed down, and just by a few words. Oh. "The first question they asked me was about cheese," he added in a flat voice, looking vaguely disgusted as he withdrew from his manic shaking of Hodgins and folded his arms. "I wasn't entirely sure how to react." Who would? This place was strange. "They really do have bars? I thought the question was merely hypothetical."

[carri3_whit3]

This in the Gryffindor question...D'you think all teenagers' lives're meanin'less?

[zacko_the_nerd]

Did he? "God, no," he replied with heightened eyebrows, sounding matter-of-factual. "Where would we be without the general happenings of several important figures' adolescence? Stephen Hawking would have completely skipped his amyotrophic lateral sclerosis diagnosis. Albert Einstein wouldn't have rebelled against high school, developed his theory of relativity - for all we know, he could have pumped gas his whole life otherwise." Don't even get him started on how George Lucas started growing a strange affinity for film in his teenage years. "Mostly I refer to the ones on television. FOX, The WB..."

Or maybe he'd just been a terrible social outcast during his youth, being incredibly intelligent and a total weirdo. Who knew?

[carri3_whit3]

Einstein I know 'bout, Hawking I don't...an' I don't know what shows you mean. I wasn't allowed t'watch very much teevee growin' up.

Don't sound like that'd be very entertainin', though. Bunch'a kids got ever'thin' and oh, horrors, they're bored? I'd trade problems with 'em in a heartbeat.

[zacko_the_nerd]

...She didn't know who Stephen Hawking was? Zack fixed Carrie with a blunt look, one that was clearly astounded as to how she didn't know him. "Stephen Hawking," he said aloud, and by his tone, it might have been a bit easy to tell that he was wondering if she was stupid or just sheltered. "One of the main contributers to cosmology, along with research on theoretical physics and general relativity?" Don't facepalm, Zack. Have patience.

She had a Southern accent, one associated with the deeply southern states. Baptists? Perhaps she had been sheltered, an extremely stereotypical, overly-religious suppression of outside sources. It was a theory. "Your parents, were they Catholic?" he asked out of the blue.

[racheltherunner]

"What kind of DVDs?" I needed a movie night like you would not believe. A little mindless entertainment was so overdue.

[zacko_the_nerd]

"Practically everything," Zack noted a bit proudly, eyes widening a bit in his excitement. When you worked in engineering, souping up your computer was a snap. He spent half of his time downloading pr0nmovies on the internet, burning them to DVDs. He had... what? Five hundred and seventy six all-together, counting seasons of television shows? "Name a few, I probably have them." He paused a moment, furrowing his eyebrows. "But not... 'girl' movies. I don't watch these so-called 'chick flicks'."

Way to break out the finger quotes, Zack. That wasn't even entirely true. He'd watched Ten Things I Hate About You, Sweet Home Alabama, Legally Blonde, AND Miss Congeniality, in some sort of bland hope of understanding women.

[racheltherunner]

Quirking one eyebrow, I simply looked at him a moment. "Because anything designed to appeal to women would be a waste of you time, huh?" Aww, poor clueless nerd.

"Well, how about something with cars. And explosions. Anything like that?"

[zacko_the_nerd]

"Actually, yes," Zack replied with a furrowed look to his eyes, contemplating the matter. "Men, for the most part, are incredibly simple, dull creatures. It doesn't take much to please them. Women are an entirely different matter, mounds of tangles and knots in your strange, strange brains that I cannot even begin to try to decipher." And, after a beat, added, "No offense." But seriously. "Complexities. Twisted theories. Incredibly heterogeneous creatures, and yet they devote their time to looking self-confessedly attractive. Why is that? Because culture tells them to do so

[busty_robin]

Just a wee bit flustered, this guy. Steph didn't want to stress him out by mentioning that the school had actual mechanical students, who might be offended by his casual use of the 'r' word.

"Nachos are good," she offered.

[zacko_the_nerd]

Technically, electro-mechanical anthropomorphisation was the correct terms for robots, which he usually used, but he tended to dumb himself down a bit around people he hadn't met before. ...Or at least tried to. Consciously.

"Of course they are," he replied with widened eyes, suppressing the slow grin that was threatening to start pulling at him. "They're practically a staple amongst humanity, children and adults, men and women alike!"

((Reposted for typos, d'oh.))

[busty_robin]

"And rightfully so!" Steph grinned. "They've got calcium, dairy, and fiber. What more could you ask for?" Steph? Addicted to junk food? Not at all.

[zacko_the_nerd]

"Not to mention incredibly aesthetically pleasing to the palate," he added with a bit of glee. Which, er. In normal-people terms meant... 'tasty'. "Yes. I approve of nachos."

[toujours_sirius]

Sirius approached Zack with a wide grin. "Nice choice for Question 4. I like her hair, too." He extended a hand. "Sirius Black, of the same question. Nice to meet you. What sort of DVDs do you have to offer? And what exactly is a robot?"

[zacko_the_nerd]

(( God, sorry about the delay! My inbox never told me about this D: ))

Anatomically speaking, Lily Evans-Potter hair was aesthetically pleasing. Natural red was a rare color, so far as hair went, and tended to appeal to the eye, didn't it?

Zack shook Sirius' hand, a little loosely. He wasn't used to shaking hands. "Zack Addy." He thought of adding something about being sorry for not picking Sirius on that, no offense, he just didn't swing that way, but... that might have been a bit awkward, on Zack's part. "And... you don't know what a robot is?" Screw the DVDs, that required attention! "A robot," he repeated in a flat tone, as if that would spark some memories. "Electro-mechanical anthropomorphisations." Oh, yes, because he was going to understand that so much better.

[toujours_sirius]

((No problem! LJ has been really twatty with notifications lately. WE ARE ALL VICTIMS OF ITS LAZINESS!))

Whaaaaaat? Sirius didn't get the monotone at all, and while he understood 'electro-mechanical', sort of (his reading up on electricity and motorbike mechanics had paid off), he had no idea what they meant when linked to the last word, which was complete gibberish to him. (Wizarding education was fairly lacking when it came to English and literature.)

"Come again?" he asked Zack in a somewhat bewildered tone.

[zacko_the_nerd]

(( LOL, when in doubt? Blame Kojiro >:( Who is, apparently, now, my net, because it is srsly not letting me post >>; As Dean, at least! ))

"Electro-mechanical anthropomorphisations," Zack repeated in that same definitive tone, shrugging a bit, as though he'd just said something as simple as 'the cat is Bob'. Okay, judging by Sirius' blank look, he'd have to break this down a bit, didn't he? "Electro-mechanical. Being that which combines the sciences of electromagnetism of electrical engineering and mechanics." Little more than that, Zack, not everybody's IQ's almost as high as DaVinci's. "Calculators, electrical motors, loudspeakers," he added by ways of example. "As for anthropomorphisation, that would be applying human characteristics to nonhuman beings, or inanimate objects."

In simple terms... that means it's a little, mechanical human.