[SENSELESS VIOLENCE ALERT ( Read more... )

Last night I had a dream about a king cake I made in January. I had saved some, and it had somehow improved with age. I decided that although the outer crust had become a little harder than I'd have liked, it must have "locked in the juices," making it moist and delicious.

I went over to Genny and Chris' last night, and for some reason, they had left their van (their only vehicle) in Kenner. The plan was that their brother-in-law Courtney, who was also there visiting, would bring Chris with him to get it on his way home. But of course, Chris fell asleep, and we couldn't wake him up when Courtney needed to leave. ( Read more... )

NASA announced to the world that some experiment required that they move the sun to an undisclosed location for a while, then put it back. My friends and I, knowing that for a variety of reasons this was impossible (or if it were possible, dangerous to the solar system), were determined to discover and expose what NASA really planned to do. That' ( Read more... )

An assignment for school was to make three grilled cheese sandwiches, each with tuna, lettuce, and tomato (hold the virgin mary). They needed to be fresh when they were handed in, so that they could be immediately driven to homeless shelters across the city for thanksgiving dinner. But because I had done the assignment in advance, my sandwiches ( Read more... )

Now's your chance! After several bids being invalidated, the Virgin Mary in Grilled Cheese is down from $99,000,099 to $7,600.

But if that's still a little steep for you, Mary Sock Monkey & the Virgin Grilled Cheese is only $33 as of this writing.

I was driving around an unfamiliar city that was experimenting with a new traffic system: You could drive in either direction in any lane on the road. There were huge numbers of accidents, but the experiment was praised as a "smashing" success (pun intended ( Read more... )

Lee Jeans came out with a new mascot, the "Lee Cow", and proceeded to sue li_kao for trademark infringement.

I was driving a rental car with a loud, annoying girl from last semester's class as my passenger. Following her direction, I took a wrong turn, and found myself on a highway that led to a very high overpass. It was windy, and the car took flight. (I'm sure this is related to the long hours of GTA 3 when I was in Boulder, even though I haven't ( Read more... )

I had just brought to a party at a friend's house a watermelon that was about four feet long, and a foot and a half wide. The house was unfamiliar. The people in the house, most of whom I didn't know, said that it would be a good idea to keep it secret as a surprise for a woman called Mom by some of the people and Aunt [Somebody] by the rest ( Read more... )