On the subject of fabulousness and a handy review

[hipgnosis6]

Somewhere along the line I stopped being fabulous. There's a certain amount of truth in the idea that being fabulous eventually gets to be too much work. I did okay at being fabulous during the times that I was only working one job and had a core group of friends to encourage me to lead and to be self assured and to sparkle

Comments

[shimmerdance]

I have been in periods in my life where the fabulous sparkliness seemed to be missing. I hated that, because it wasn't me. it was mostly due to depression for me, and feeling like it was all far too much work. How could I be fabulous when I could barely get out of bed and make cereal for my daughter? Thankfully, I climbed out of that, with the help of Cymbalta, one of my favorite chemical compounds. I still battle with all of the same issues, but I have better weapons now, and more strength points, if I, a non-gamer, may use a gaming metaphor.

I still spend a lot of time being overwhelmed. I try really hard to remember that my tasks can be broken up, and that 15 minutes of work can result in visible difference. It continues to be a struggle, but I can envision winning now, which I couldn't for years. Just the ability to envision victory gives me the freedom to be sparkly again. I sincerely hope you find that place, too.

xoxo

[hipgnosis6]

Roxanne's character sheet would have lots of points in charisma, endurance, wisdom, intelligence; moderate points in dexterity and strength, and you'd have a +1 Cape of Sparkliness and multiple skill levels in Mommy-Fu (useful not just for little people under the age of 12, but also for big babies of all ages).

[shimmerdance]

That is SOOOOOOOOOOOOO cool! Thanks! It is making me gring like crazy. I think I need a cool name for that character now, though I suppose I could just stick with the tried and true Princess Sparklepants...

I'm totally posting this in my journal.

[hipgnosis6]

When I indulge in the rare tabletop RPG, I also have a default name - Monday Morning. This was considered absolutely remarkable until I started gaming with two friends now long gone, who both had default character names. Theirs were Chance Meeting and Ash Wednesday.

At one point I played in a Real Life Fantasy RPG - the game was set in town and our characters had access to whatever tools and supplies that we would personally. We were assigned the excercise of creating characters for each of our fellow collaborators and the GM picked which of them we got to use. It was fun and interesting to see how our friends assessed us. (I found out later much to my dismay that the rest of the players knew the basic game concept and wanted me in the game solely because at the time I drove a freaking gigantic Dodge pickup and have access to a full machine shop - resources worth their weight in gold when you need to defend the 520 bridge against Godzilla!)

[dianyla]

While on one hand I agree with what you're saying "No matter where you go, there you are" I still think there's a lot of power that one gets by moving and changing their location. It's like it suddenly gives you permission to completely revamp your lifestyle and fix it up the way you really want it. It's much easier to break old habits and form new ones by changing the scenery.

It sounds like a good move. :)

[jammin682]

I've done that whole "moving the fuck away" thing, and I'd recommend it to anyone. You do get that "no matter where go...." crap... but instead of having yourself, your past, and your bullshit rammed in your nose at all times (by memories, friends, loved ones, ghosts on porches etc.), you get to experience yourself in a new place, see different dimensions of your head... and sometimes... just fucking breathe.

.... on that note... I'm sorry that I've been a hermit for the last year, its been a little on the hectic side and I think we should definitely catch up before you leave, (before I leave) and then try to keep in touch.

jm

[hipgnosis6]

Say, didn't you come back from your time moved away bitter and broke and in the same old place that you were before? From what I can tell, I think maybe you moved for the right reasons but to the wrong place (SoCal will eat your soul as soon as look at you) - but the flip side of that coin is that moving to Silicon Valley is easily the best thing my brother ever did for himself.

Don't worry too much about being a hermit, Jeffy. I've had some times in this last year where I've desperately needed my friends to offer me no more than time out of my hobbit-hole, and you are one of the people that I asked at least once to do something. However, you're the least offender (if you ever run into Ramon, kick him in the nuts for me). And I <3 my Jeffy-friend anyways.

I'm leaving town in six weeks. Sometime between now and then, I'll throw out an invitation for some low-key mayhem. You should come.

[unkadwayne]

You will always be my fabulously sparkly Lori!

Dazzling, eve.