mcfly-slash ... Come back to who you were ... Chapter 5
happy new year everybody!
new year = new update!
Title: Come back to who you were
Author: would be me
Rating: PG-13
Chapter: 5/7
Genre: Drama
Pairing: Harry/Dougie
Summary: Dougie has had an accident ... and a new life to follow
Disclaimer: me no own, this no true
Dedication: goes out to me wee Cazza ... the only reason why I am even writing anything McFly! And to those who commented on the last part, making me feel loved and fuzzy .. harryslilduck, markie98, ichnal, __penetration, okthnxbye, postitjunkie, laderinmytights, ktandtf4life and stfoosa
Author’s note: At first I wanted this to be more like “The Notebook” but the more I wrote the less it turned out like it. But I like what resulted in the end.
Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Again, weeks pass with no remarkable change for Dougie. Apart from the fact that he came back to life. Slowly and cautious at first but as time went on, he got used to everything.
It was his own decision to live life like nothing had happened. He wanted to get back on stage, bring McFly back to life with him. We had already done a few interviews, tv-shows and photoshoots for magazines. The first show was scheduled in a few weeks time.
The girlfriend subject was never brought to the table again. Or at least not with me. Tom told me Dougie had been speaking to him about it. Honestly, I am thankful for that. Yet, hurt at the same time since Dougie was apparently a little too into the whole girl-thing for my taste.
Dougie and I were still living together in his flat. I had suggested on a few occasions that I could get back to my own place whenever he wanted me to but he said he liked having me around and wouldn’t want me to leave. And so I stayed.
I usually slept on the couch-bed in the living room but there were some times when Dougie would just come to me in the middle of the night or asked me to sleep with him in his bed because he didn’t want to be alone. Even though the little voice in my head literally shouted at me to rather not have him with me, I never refused.
One night we all went out. First time after Dougie’s accident. The fun he had was visible in all his features and I loved watching him soak up the nightlife.
It all turned ugly in a matter of moments though.
I had to go to the bathroom and when I came back Dougie was over at the bar chatting up some brunette with massive breasts, wearing a top at least one size too small, who was playing with her hair in a fake act of innocense that almost made me throw up.
I kept myself busy listening to whatever nonsense Tom and Danny said and tried to not pay attention to Dougie and the brunette. It worked because when I casually looked towards the bar again after a few minutes neither Dougie nor the girl were in sight. I hadn’t even noticed them leaving their spot. Of course I wondered where they had gone off to but then I thought to myself that neither new nor old Dougie would just disappear to a hidden corner with someone he met just a couple of minutes.
About half an hour later reality chose to hit me with a sledgehammer though. We were about to leave and started looking for our young friend. Apparently Tom had spotted him first because he rushed away from us as if a flash of lightening had struck him.
I looked into the general direction Tom had run off to and that’s when I saw Dougie as well.
His lips were locked to the brunette’s, one hand was draped on the backrest of the booth they sat in, his other hand had disappeared to somewhere underneath the tabletop. She had both her arms wrapped around his neck and seemed to enjoy their little match of tonsil-tennis just too much.
Seeing that broke my heart. I just stood there, staring at them. I felt Danny’s eyes on me and he was apparently as shocked as I was since he didn’t say a word either.
Tom had by then reached them and probably told Dougie we would be leaving. Dougie didn’t even look anywhere near ashamed that he was caught in his heated make out session with this girl.
“I’ll wait outside.” I just said, got out of our own booth and headed towards the door.
It took a couple of minutes until Tom, Danny and Dougie met me at the side exit of the club we had been at. The girl wasn’t with them, thank god. Dougie seemed oblivious to everything, including the fact that I didn’t even look at him. Tom and Danny shared a short look with each other before Danny spoke up.
“Hey, what do you say we all stay at my place tonight? No separated taxis and all. We’ll be lucky to get just one anyway.”
I know Danny had just suggested that to save me from being alone with Dougie and having to listen to whatever went on with the girl of the club. And I couldn’t thank him enough.
“Sounds alright to me. How about you guys?” Tom asked.
“Well, I don’t care where I’ll sleep as long as I get to any bed soon. I’m so knackered.” Dougie said.
“Okay.” was all I said before getting out my phone to call up a taxi.
On the whole way to Danny’s I didn’t say a word. Dougie was chatting animatedly about how much he had enjoyed the night. He didn’t even mention the girl with one word though.
At Danny’s we had quickly decided who would be sleeping where. Dougie and Danny would share Danny’s bed, Tom took the couch in the living room and I’d get the guestroom all to myself. Again, I couldn’t be thankful enough about that.
As soon as the sleeping arrangements were settled I set off for the guestroom. I took off my clothes and crawled under the sheets, hoping tonight’s events wouldn’t cause any nightmares. It took a while and long after the flat fell silent sleep finally consumed me.
The next morning I was awake last according to the noises that came from the living room or kitchen. I sat up. Bad idea, the movement caused my head to ache. Trust me to be the one drinking the least being the one with the hangover.
I grabbed the t-shirt that Danny must’ve thrown into the room at some point earlier and put it on before getting out of the room. I found Tom, Danny and Dougie all sitting in the kitchen having breakfast.
“Morning Harry. Slept alright?” Tom asked and I think I heard a bit of a worried tone in his question.
“Mmmm.” I just mumbled and poured me some coffee.
“You look rotten.” Dougie stated bluntly while munching on some cereal.
“Nightmare.” I said shortly while sipping on the warm liquid in my mug.
Dougie just nodded. I could tell by the look on his face he didn’t believe a word I said but he knew better than to press on the issue at hand.
“I need a shower.” I stated, “Danny, do you mind …?”
“No mate, just help yourself. You know where to find everything.” Danny replied.
“Right.” I downed the rest of my coffee, put the mug in the diswasher and headed for the bathroom. Anything to not be in the same room like Dougie for too long.
After I was done in the bathroom, and I took a lot longer than I usually do, I changed back into last night’s clothes, in my own sweet time as well, before I make my way to the living room. I am faced with no one but Dougie sitting on the couch watching something on TV. Tom apparently had left while I was in the shower to meet his girlfriend and Danny was in the kitchen doing whatever with as much noise as it was possible for a human being.
“You ready?” Dougie asked when I entered the room. He was already dressed.
“Ready for what?”
“My mum called. She invited us over for lunch … a late lunch. But Tom’s with Gi and Danny said he has plans as well. I told my mum it’ll be just you and me. Or are you doing anything as well?” His question sounded pleading, as if hoping I wouldn’t ditch him as well.
“No, it’s fine. I’ll come. When are we off?”
“Right now actually. I’ve just been waiting for you. You took forever today.”
I look at the clock on the wall and notice that I’ve been getting ready for longer than an hour. I shrug my shoulders. “The shower felt so nice after tonight.”
Dougie got up from the couch. “Anyway, at least you’re here now.” He slings his arm around my shoulder. “Oi Danny, we’re off!” he called towards the kitchen.
“Ok. See you guys later!” Danny called back over the noise he made.
The ride to Dougie’s mum was spent in silence as well. I know for a fact that Dougie felt the urgent need to ask me what was going on with me but his better judgement kept him from it.
What would I tell him anyway? That him making out with a girl right in front of my eyes shattered my heart into thousand pieces because I loved him with everything I am and he should remember that? That he openly cheated on me last night without even knowing about it? That he isn’t even straight in the first place?
When we reached Dougie’s old home I welcomed the distraction with open arms. I helped his mother in the kitchen while Dougie was mocking around the house with his sister.
“You’re quiet today. Anything wrong, sweetheart?” Dougie’s mother asked while we were cutting some vegetables.
“When we were out last night your dearest son made out with a girl. And on top of that he isn’t even ashamed of it nor fussed that everyone could see it.” I said, a hint of sarcasm obvious in my voice.
Apparently I was getting behind the whole hurt-phase and now moved to the anger-hurt phase of the whole process.
“He did not!?” Dougie’s mother said in disbelief.
“I swear on my drumkit.” I replied.
“I don’t understand that.”
“What is there to not understand? The accident didn’t just erase Dougie’s memory, it also made him straight. And proud of it.”
I was getting more and more angry with each second. I gestured widly with the cutting knife still in my hand. Mrs Poynter snatched it away from me and also laid down her own knife.
“Sit down, I’ll make us some tea.” she ordered and I did as she told.
A few minutes later we sat at the kitchen table, steaming tea in front of us.
“So what’s wrong?” Mrs Poynter asked.
I shook my head, not quite knowing where to start. “Everything and nothing at the same time. I love Dougie so much and he used to love me too. But he has no idea about it, simply forgot it like you forget to get milk from the supermarket. And he’s so oblivious to everything because he simply doesn’t remember what it used to be like. And I can’t do anything but somehow keep my strengh and sanity while he goes and makes out with random girls he met ten damn minutes ago. And that makes me so sad and irritated and angry and everything. That’s just not Dougie, not my Dougie. But I can’t stop loving him even though I know I should so I can keep moving on. He’s moved on so why can’t I?”
I pause and sigh deeply to calm myself down. “Why haven’t I lost my memory? I should have been with him that night instead of staying at home because of a bloody headache! I wouldn’t have let him drink that much. I would’ve kept my hands on him so he wouldn’t have stumbled onto the road. If I had just been …”
“Quit that bullshit Harry!” came a voice from the doorway.
Mrs Poynter and me spun around and saw Dougie and his sister in the entryway to the kitchen. Dougie was leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed in front of his chest with an angry look on his face.
I immediately paled, thinking about all the things I had just spilled to Mrs Poynter. If Dougie had heard too much I would have some real explanation to do.
“How much have you heard?” I checked carefully.
“Enough to understand that you blame yourself for what happened to me. And I won’t have anything of it. From what I heard it was me who decided to get drunk of my arse and it was me who couldn’t walk anymore. And it was some idiot who won his license in the lottery and who was driving too fast that hit me. Nothing of that is your fault so shut up for god’s sake. Dammit Harry, if anything it’s your fault that I came back onto my feet after the accident. You’ve been my biggest support and that’s all you should blame yourself for.”
After saying that Dougie turned around and moments later the front door slammed shut. I let my head sink down onto the tabletop and hit my forehead against it a few times.
“I am such a fucking idiot!” I said to myself.
“Not yet but you will be if you won’t get up on your sorry legs right now and run after him.” Dougie’s sister said dryly before turning and leaving as well, probably up to her room.
I contemplated this for a moment before getting up from the table. I was almost out of the room when I remembered I had volunteered to help preparing the dinner.
“You mind?” I asked Dougie’s mother.
“Nonsense. Out with you.” she replied and smiled warmly at me.
I sprinted out of the kitchen, grabbed mine and Dougie’s jackets from the hangers by the front door and got out of the house. Dougie was nowhere in sight but I had an idea where he might have gone to so I turned to my left and ran.
To be continued
Comments are appreciated
PoynterJudd Chaptered
new year = new update!
Title: Come back to who you were
Author: would be me
Rating: PG-13
Chapter: 5/7
Genre: Drama
Pairing: Harry/Dougie
Summary: Dougie has had an accident ... and a new life to follow
Disclaimer: me no own, this no true
Dedication: goes out to me wee Cazza ... the only reason why I am even writing anything McFly! And to those who commented on the last part, making me feel loved and fuzzy .. harryslilduck, markie98, ichnal, __penetration, okthnxbye, postitjunkie, laderinmytights, ktandtf4life and stfoosa
Author’s note: At first I wanted this to be more like “The Notebook” but the more I wrote the less it turned out like it. But I like what resulted in the end.
Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Again, weeks pass with no remarkable change for Dougie. Apart from the fact that he came back to life. Slowly and cautious at first but as time went on, he got used to everything.
It was his own decision to live life like nothing had happened. He wanted to get back on stage, bring McFly back to life with him. We had already done a few interviews, tv-shows and photoshoots for magazines. The first show was scheduled in a few weeks time.
The girlfriend subject was never brought to the table again. Or at least not with me. Tom told me Dougie had been speaking to him about it. Honestly, I am thankful for that. Yet, hurt at the same time since Dougie was apparently a little too into the whole girl-thing for my taste.
Dougie and I were still living together in his flat. I had suggested on a few occasions that I could get back to my own place whenever he wanted me to but he said he liked having me around and wouldn’t want me to leave. And so I stayed.
I usually slept on the couch-bed in the living room but there were some times when Dougie would just come to me in the middle of the night or asked me to sleep with him in his bed because he didn’t want to be alone. Even though the little voice in my head literally shouted at me to rather not have him with me, I never refused.
One night we all went out. First time after Dougie’s accident. The fun he had was visible in all his features and I loved watching him soak up the nightlife.
It all turned ugly in a matter of moments though.
I had to go to the bathroom and when I came back Dougie was over at the bar chatting up some brunette with massive breasts, wearing a top at least one size too small, who was playing with her hair in a fake act of innocense that almost made me throw up.
I kept myself busy listening to whatever nonsense Tom and Danny said and tried to not pay attention to Dougie and the brunette. It worked because when I casually looked towards the bar again after a few minutes neither Dougie nor the girl were in sight. I hadn’t even noticed them leaving their spot. Of course I wondered where they had gone off to but then I thought to myself that neither new nor old Dougie would just disappear to a hidden corner with someone he met just a couple of minutes.
About half an hour later reality chose to hit me with a sledgehammer though. We were about to leave and started looking for our young friend. Apparently Tom had spotted him first because he rushed away from us as if a flash of lightening had struck him.
I looked into the general direction Tom had run off to and that’s when I saw Dougie as well.
His lips were locked to the brunette’s, one hand was draped on the backrest of the booth they sat in, his other hand had disappeared to somewhere underneath the tabletop. She had both her arms wrapped around his neck and seemed to enjoy their little match of tonsil-tennis just too much.
Seeing that broke my heart. I just stood there, staring at them. I felt Danny’s eyes on me and he was apparently as shocked as I was since he didn’t say a word either.
Tom had by then reached them and probably told Dougie we would be leaving. Dougie didn’t even look anywhere near ashamed that he was caught in his heated make out session with this girl.
“I’ll wait outside.” I just said, got out of our own booth and headed towards the door.
It took a couple of minutes until Tom, Danny and Dougie met me at the side exit of the club we had been at. The girl wasn’t with them, thank god. Dougie seemed oblivious to everything, including the fact that I didn’t even look at him. Tom and Danny shared a short look with each other before Danny spoke up.
“Hey, what do you say we all stay at my place tonight? No separated taxis and all. We’ll be lucky to get just one anyway.”
I know Danny had just suggested that to save me from being alone with Dougie and having to listen to whatever went on with the girl of the club. And I couldn’t thank him enough.
“Sounds alright to me. How about you guys?” Tom asked.
“Well, I don’t care where I’ll sleep as long as I get to any bed soon. I’m so knackered.” Dougie said.
“Okay.” was all I said before getting out my phone to call up a taxi.
On the whole way to Danny’s I didn’t say a word. Dougie was chatting animatedly about how much he had enjoyed the night. He didn’t even mention the girl with one word though.
At Danny’s we had quickly decided who would be sleeping where. Dougie and Danny would share Danny’s bed, Tom took the couch in the living room and I’d get the guestroom all to myself. Again, I couldn’t be thankful enough about that.
As soon as the sleeping arrangements were settled I set off for the guestroom. I took off my clothes and crawled under the sheets, hoping tonight’s events wouldn’t cause any nightmares. It took a while and long after the flat fell silent sleep finally consumed me.
The next morning I was awake last according to the noises that came from the living room or kitchen. I sat up. Bad idea, the movement caused my head to ache. Trust me to be the one drinking the least being the one with the hangover.
I grabbed the t-shirt that Danny must’ve thrown into the room at some point earlier and put it on before getting out of the room. I found Tom, Danny and Dougie all sitting in the kitchen having breakfast.
“Morning Harry. Slept alright?” Tom asked and I think I heard a bit of a worried tone in his question.
“Mmmm.” I just mumbled and poured me some coffee.
“You look rotten.” Dougie stated bluntly while munching on some cereal.
“Nightmare.” I said shortly while sipping on the warm liquid in my mug.
Dougie just nodded. I could tell by the look on his face he didn’t believe a word I said but he knew better than to press on the issue at hand.
“I need a shower.” I stated, “Danny, do you mind …?”
“No mate, just help yourself. You know where to find everything.” Danny replied.
“Right.” I downed the rest of my coffee, put the mug in the diswasher and headed for the bathroom. Anything to not be in the same room like Dougie for too long.
After I was done in the bathroom, and I took a lot longer than I usually do, I changed back into last night’s clothes, in my own sweet time as well, before I make my way to the living room. I am faced with no one but Dougie sitting on the couch watching something on TV. Tom apparently had left while I was in the shower to meet his girlfriend and Danny was in the kitchen doing whatever with as much noise as it was possible for a human being.
“You ready?” Dougie asked when I entered the room. He was already dressed.
“Ready for what?”
“My mum called. She invited us over for lunch … a late lunch. But Tom’s with Gi and Danny said he has plans as well. I told my mum it’ll be just you and me. Or are you doing anything as well?” His question sounded pleading, as if hoping I wouldn’t ditch him as well.
“No, it’s fine. I’ll come. When are we off?”
“Right now actually. I’ve just been waiting for you. You took forever today.”
I look at the clock on the wall and notice that I’ve been getting ready for longer than an hour. I shrug my shoulders. “The shower felt so nice after tonight.”
Dougie got up from the couch. “Anyway, at least you’re here now.” He slings his arm around my shoulder. “Oi Danny, we’re off!” he called towards the kitchen.
“Ok. See you guys later!” Danny called back over the noise he made.
The ride to Dougie’s mum was spent in silence as well. I know for a fact that Dougie felt the urgent need to ask me what was going on with me but his better judgement kept him from it.
What would I tell him anyway? That him making out with a girl right in front of my eyes shattered my heart into thousand pieces because I loved him with everything I am and he should remember that? That he openly cheated on me last night without even knowing about it? That he isn’t even straight in the first place?
When we reached Dougie’s old home I welcomed the distraction with open arms. I helped his mother in the kitchen while Dougie was mocking around the house with his sister.
“You’re quiet today. Anything wrong, sweetheart?” Dougie’s mother asked while we were cutting some vegetables.
“When we were out last night your dearest son made out with a girl. And on top of that he isn’t even ashamed of it nor fussed that everyone could see it.” I said, a hint of sarcasm obvious in my voice.
Apparently I was getting behind the whole hurt-phase and now moved to the anger-hurt phase of the whole process.
“He did not!?” Dougie’s mother said in disbelief.
“I swear on my drumkit.” I replied.
“I don’t understand that.”
“What is there to not understand? The accident didn’t just erase Dougie’s memory, it also made him straight. And proud of it.”
I was getting more and more angry with each second. I gestured widly with the cutting knife still in my hand. Mrs Poynter snatched it away from me and also laid down her own knife.
“Sit down, I’ll make us some tea.” she ordered and I did as she told.
A few minutes later we sat at the kitchen table, steaming tea in front of us.
“So what’s wrong?” Mrs Poynter asked.
I shook my head, not quite knowing where to start. “Everything and nothing at the same time. I love Dougie so much and he used to love me too. But he has no idea about it, simply forgot it like you forget to get milk from the supermarket. And he’s so oblivious to everything because he simply doesn’t remember what it used to be like. And I can’t do anything but somehow keep my strengh and sanity while he goes and makes out with random girls he met ten damn minutes ago. And that makes me so sad and irritated and angry and everything. That’s just not Dougie, not my Dougie. But I can’t stop loving him even though I know I should so I can keep moving on. He’s moved on so why can’t I?”
I pause and sigh deeply to calm myself down. “Why haven’t I lost my memory? I should have been with him that night instead of staying at home because of a bloody headache! I wouldn’t have let him drink that much. I would’ve kept my hands on him so he wouldn’t have stumbled onto the road. If I had just been …”
“Quit that bullshit Harry!” came a voice from the doorway.
Mrs Poynter and me spun around and saw Dougie and his sister in the entryway to the kitchen. Dougie was leaning against the doorframe, arms crossed in front of his chest with an angry look on his face.
I immediately paled, thinking about all the things I had just spilled to Mrs Poynter. If Dougie had heard too much I would have some real explanation to do.
“How much have you heard?” I checked carefully.
“Enough to understand that you blame yourself for what happened to me. And I won’t have anything of it. From what I heard it was me who decided to get drunk of my arse and it was me who couldn’t walk anymore. And it was some idiot who won his license in the lottery and who was driving too fast that hit me. Nothing of that is your fault so shut up for god’s sake. Dammit Harry, if anything it’s your fault that I came back onto my feet after the accident. You’ve been my biggest support and that’s all you should blame yourself for.”
After saying that Dougie turned around and moments later the front door slammed shut. I let my head sink down onto the tabletop and hit my forehead against it a few times.
“I am such a fucking idiot!” I said to myself.
“Not yet but you will be if you won’t get up on your sorry legs right now and run after him.” Dougie’s sister said dryly before turning and leaving as well, probably up to her room.
I contemplated this for a moment before getting up from the table. I was almost out of the room when I remembered I had volunteered to help preparing the dinner.
“You mind?” I asked Dougie’s mother.
“Nonsense. Out with you.” she replied and smiled warmly at me.
I sprinted out of the kitchen, grabbed mine and Dougie’s jackets from the hangers by the front door and got out of the house. Dougie was nowhere in sight but I had an idea where he might have gone to so I turned to my left and ran.
To be continued
Comments are appreciated
PoynterJudd Chaptered