“Tasha? Can I -?” he touches a strand of red, her hair, still just as long as it was. She nods and swallows as his hand gets lost in the red of her; it feels just as good and safe as everything else. Her hair is wrapped around his fingers, and she is wrapped around him, and something slides and locks, a misplaced piece finally finding it's fit.
GUH GUH GUH ALL THE FEELS!!!!!!!!!!
Yes, you can, she thinks, you can do anything to me now. It remains unspoken, but it's loud and clear in her mind echoing while she's falling back to sleep.Oooooooo, and this? This is the crux of the issue, this is what's going to cause her to come back around later and feel like she needs to find her footing again - "you can do anything to me now". Because on the one hand, she knows that she trusts him, and she will let him do anything he wants to do because she trusts him to take care of her and not harm her. BUT she has a lifetime of "you are the only one that can protect yourself, other people are in control of you, etc
( ... )
Him asking if he can do something to her/with her and waiting for her to allow and agree is SUCH HUGE THING FOR ME. HUGE. So I'm just so so happy you like that little quote up there, to me it's an echo of their first time and this is why she trusts him, because he treats her like a person who belongs to herself. And I love them so so much! :)
Because on the one hand, she knows that she trusts him, and she will let him do anything he wants to do because she trusts him to take care of her and not harm her. BUT she has a lifetime of "you are the only one that can protect yourself, other people are in control of you, etc." going on that isn't that easy to shake.This, what she does here? This is the crux of a true D/s power exchange, right here. Beautifully and gloriously put. It's... it's all about saying "I have complete trust in you, that you will see what I need/want/will help me, and I will let you lead the experience. That MY decision, the most important decision and the one that has the most power in the situation, is to trust youI
( ... )
That was so ... powerful and beautiful, just gorgeous! The pace and flow of the story was perfect. And all the EMOTION! I feel a bit wrung out, but in a good way.
I think I've developed a thing for shower scenes, and this has TWO!
Him asking her before he touches her hair -- both times, *guh*
LOVE these parts:
She flexes her fingers, reaches a bit further, and he's there, the warm skin of his chest and steady beat of his heart and the notion of being safe slowly comes to life inside of her. It starts in her toes, in her fingers, it spreads like breaths and blood and it pulses through her, seizing her bit by bit, dim and distant like dawn light, making it's way steadily to a new day, new light. Her body uncurls, loosens, and she opens her eyes.
She moves closer, because he's here and she knows that she is safe with him. She senses it in her skin and muscles, knows it like she knows her hair winding around her; she learns it like she learns the patterns of his steps and the lines on his palm. She is the one with an eye for
( ... )
How wonderful, because I have a HUGE thing for shower scenes. We might not be done with them! (and I got your message! Give me a little time, I can write you a ficlet.) Uh I feel proud? If you feel wrung out, then I had to do something right :D
Him asking her before he touches her hair -- both times
He knows how big and important thing that is for her. She had a life where nothing belonged to her, not her body, not her mind, or her actions; and her hair, this defiant, ever growing, red thing, it's a symbol of her endurance, her spirit. She wasn't broken, despite everything she had to go through, and Clint is being so so respectful of that. He knows how this feels, when you don't belong to yourself, but he never had it so drastic and harsh like she did, so I think he's helping her heal and while he's doing that, he's helping himself heal as well.
OMG!!! O_O What made you (almost) cry?! I'ma ware this is emotional, it was intended to be, but I didn't think it would be nearly tear inducing. I'm very intrigued now, what moved you so much? (Also, THANK YOU!!!)
The way she remembers that incident of her past and - especially - the almost reverent way Clint deals with it, giving her some space but still being there, her support, her protector... SO BEAUTIFUL!
*nods* Gotcha! And I'm so glad, because we discussed the scenarios we could do here, and decided to go with this thing from her past. I think the memory of having her hair cut (as a punishment) represents how little control she had, but then her hair always grew back, equally beautiful and red, and I used that as a symbol of *her* - they were never able to completely destroy her.
this was really lovely-- him taking care of her, her letting him do so, and i think the scene with the coffee was my favorite. just that quiet moment of shared understanding. beautiful. <3
I enjoyed writing the quiet parts (both the one with coffee, and the one where she wakes up and just doesn't want to move - except closer to him.) I like how she gives him her cup and her coffee, just to have him close. I didn't have that moment exactly planned, it just wrote itself that way. Glad you enjoyed it! And the fic! THANK YOUUUU!
SUNNY!!! YOUR COMMENTS! THEY ARE THE BEST OMG WOMAN!!! *flails*
I loved this caring side of Clint, loved writing it - she feels grounded, but not suffocated or bound down by him, she feels safe but isn't necessarily saved in that "he saved her" sense (which he did this time, but in grand scheme of things, he is her companion on her voyage of reclaiming herself. which is a completely different, infinitely more complex thing. um, ahem! i was saying.) and yes, EVEN TRADE. that's precisely where the safety is. they're even, equal; and sometimes he is the first to give in order to receive in return, because that's his way to show her he trusts her and it's okay and she's safe with him and he trusts he is safe with her as well. it's how it went with their first time; he was the first one to give himself to her, and it happens here with oral sex, which totally IS existential thing for these two. it's (again) about the trust and giving up power and putting one own's pleasure into other person's hands.
it's also probably why i'm so in love with this corner of the fandom that subverts the normal and traditional views on relationships and interactions without lessening the characterisations or portraying one half as weaker and subservient to the other. it's always always always about true motivation and a willingness to give.THIS. CAN WE DISCUSS THIS? this is why this little corner of awesome feels so liberating and amazing. these two are such fine line to walk (and write), but on the other hand, i never felt so free as a writer. there were/are couples i wrote about, and was always worried about portraying one side weaker (especially the female character). sga john/elizabeth being the prime example of how much is too much, and at which point i'm starting to damsel elizabeth. i just don't have same worries with these two. they're equally strong, equally fierce, equally vulnerable and fucked up and they can both be caregivers and in need of care, and playing with that is just so addicting. they're gorgeous, they're amazing and
( ... )
Comments 26
THIS:
“Tasha? Can I -?” he touches a strand of red, her hair, still just as long as it was. She nods and swallows as his hand gets lost in the red of her; it feels just as good and safe as everything else. Her hair is wrapped around his fingers, and she is wrapped around him, and something slides and locks, a misplaced piece finally finding it's fit.
GUH GUH GUH ALL THE FEELS!!!!!!!!!!
Yes, you can, she thinks, you can do anything to me now. It remains unspoken, but it's loud and clear in her mind echoing while she's falling back to sleep.Oooooooo, and this? This is the crux of the issue, this is what's going to cause her to come back around later and feel like she needs to find her footing again - "you can do anything to me now". Because on the one hand, she knows that she trusts him, and she will let him do anything he wants to do because she trusts him to take care of her and not harm her. BUT she has a lifetime of "you are the only one that can protect yourself, other people are in control of you, etc ( ... )
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Because on the one hand, she knows that she trusts him, and she will let him do anything he wants to do because she trusts him to take care of her and not harm her. BUT she has a lifetime of "you are the only one that can protect yourself, other people are in control of you, etc." going on that isn't that easy to shake.This, what she does here? This is the crux of a true D/s power exchange, right here. Beautifully and gloriously put. It's... it's all about saying "I have complete trust in you, that you will see what I need/want/will help me, and I will let you lead the experience. That MY decision, the most important decision and the one that has the most power in the situation, is to trust youI ( ... )
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I think I've developed a thing for shower scenes, and this has TWO!
Him asking her before he touches her hair -- both times, *guh*
LOVE these parts:
She flexes her fingers, reaches a bit further, and he's there, the warm skin of his chest and steady beat of his heart and the notion of being safe slowly comes to life inside of her. It starts in her toes, in her fingers, it spreads like breaths and blood and it pulses through her, seizing her bit by bit, dim and distant like dawn light, making it's way steadily to a new day, new light. Her body uncurls, loosens, and she opens her eyes.
She moves closer, because he's here and she knows that she is safe with him. She senses it in her skin and muscles, knows it like she knows her hair winding around her; she learns it like she learns the patterns of his steps and the lines on his palm. She is the one with an eye for ( ... )
Reply
Him asking her before he touches her hair -- both times
He knows how big and important thing that is for her. She had a life where nothing belonged to her, not her body, not her mind, or her actions; and her hair, this defiant, ever growing, red thing, it's a symbol of her endurance, her spirit. She wasn't broken, despite everything she had to go through, and Clint is being so so respectful of that. He knows how this feels, when you don't belong to yourself, but he never had it so drastic and harsh like she did, so I think he's helping her heal and while he's doing that, he's helping himself heal as well.
So glad you're enjoying this. :)
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PERFECT!
i can't choose one part - just one - to express my feelings now. Absofuckinglutely PERFECT.
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*HUGS*
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:)
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I loved this caring side of Clint, loved writing it - she feels grounded, but not suffocated or bound down by him, she feels safe but isn't necessarily saved in that "he saved her" sense (which he did this time, but in grand scheme of things, he is her companion on her voyage of reclaiming herself. which is a completely different, infinitely more complex thing. um, ahem! i was saying.) and yes, EVEN TRADE. that's precisely where the safety is. they're even, equal; and sometimes he is the first to give in order to receive in return, because that's his way to show her he trusts her and it's okay and she's safe with him and he trusts he is safe with her as well. it's how it went with their first time; he was the first one to give himself to her, and it happens here with oral sex, which totally IS existential thing for these two. it's (again) about the trust and giving up power and putting one own's pleasure into other person's hands.
they are surrounded by whispered half ( ... )
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