HT100 FlashFic Challenge #07: Lit Up -- "Whatever Gets You Through The Night"

[severina2001]

Title: Whatever Gets You Through The Night
Prompt: 07: Lit Up (drugs or alcohol)
Timeframe: Episode 206: Strange Bedfellows
Word Count: 698

Comments

[beechercreature]

Noooo, DON'T DO IT, TOE-BEEEE! *sniffle*

I like how you have the sort of franticness showing through, with Toby pacing back and forth, folding and refolding the same pieces of clothing.

This scene always hurts a little bit, especially on 2nd and so on viewings. Now it hurts a little more.

[severina2001]

Toby. He never listens.

Thank you!

[trillingstar]

I've actually had moonshine, and yeah, it's NO JOKE. I can imagine something brewed in prison would be a thousand times worse.

I love the last couple of paragraphs here, great descriptions. How alcohol may be the balm to what ails him now, but his newest addiction is Chris. The comparison of ambrosia and kissing Chris. Yummy.

[severina2001]

Thank you! I went back to rewatch the scene and had to end up making changes to the fic, and they all seemed to be for the better. :)

[ozsaur]

That was intense. I could feel Toby just itching to take that first drink. You actually made me wonder if he was going to do it. And I love that he admits that he's weak, almost like it's an excuse. The last few lines-- whew! Perfect!

[severina2001]

Thank you very much. I'm especially pleased the ending worked for you. :)

[roguemarch]

Oh, so perfect analogy of Toby's two addictions: alcohol and Chris. Great writing!

[severina2001]

Thanks very much!