HT100 FlashFic Challenge #01: Forgiveness

[severina2001]

Title: Forgiveness
Prompt: 01: Forgiveness
Timeframe: Season Three
Authors Notes: Cafeteria and Computer Room dialogue from episode 307, 'Secret Identities'.
Word Count: 858

Comments

[luci_2]

Xmas is early this year. You started doing the flashfics !

Love it, when Toby realizes what he has been trying to push down.

[severina2001]

Oh wow, what a great comment. Thank you so much. I'm really really glad you liked it. My first non-drabble for Oz. Yay!

[ozsaur]

There is a lot of truth here - both beautiful and ugly. Toby had to dig down through the ugliest emotions to finally get to the real truth, that he loved Chris. I also enjoyed that glimpse of Said, that he needed to take some of the advice he'd been doling out. Nicely done!

I'm so happy that you are working on the flashfics!

[severina2001]

Thank you! I almost put a little disclaimer that said, like, "I'm not sure this is REALLY the way Toby felt"... but in the end, it's certainly one way he could have felt. So.

I'm so happy that you are working on the flashfics!

Me too. :D

[trillingstar]

I think Toby's been feeling weak and small for longer than his time in Oz. Chris gave him control as Operation Toby progressed. Toby repeatedly rejecting Keller's advances is completely logical. I love that you called attention to the charge that Toby gets when he does it - even as he's also feeling empty, guilty, and scared.

I really like the first half of this, especially these lines: When Chris responds, says “I love you”, his voice soft and breathless and filled with wonder, Toby’s heartbeat quickens and his palms sweat and he wants to close his eyes, breathe Chris in. He thinks forgiveness is Keller’s arms around him and Keller’s heat against his.

[severina2001]

I go back and forth on that, and I can see both sides (and will probably write both sides!), but I usually come down more on the "not particularly weak on the outside" side. Sometimes a drunk is a drunk because he just likes to drink. *shrugs*

Thanks!

[roguemarch]

Loved this far too much! Toby really is so codependent of his status with Chris. He needs him, to make him suffer, to make him happy.

[severina2001]

My first little flashfic. My baby. *snuggles it*

Thank you!

Toby really is so codependent of his status with Chris. He needs him, to make him suffer, to make him happy.

Oh. I love this comment. Very insightful. You're going to have me thinking all night, now.

[roguemarch]

Uhm... sorry? :D

[severina2001]

*sticks out tongue*