Hard Truths
I dunno...I just had some things I wanted to say. A lot of these things may already be known to you, and others may be hard for you to accept...but whatever.
1. MTV is awful, and the enemy of all good things...particularly music. If you like it, I will view you as less of a person. Can't really help that. Same goes for reality television in general.
2. The Wii's titles thus far suck easily as much as PS3, and as much as Xbox 360's did when it arrived on scene. It hasn't yet proved to be a better system...just to have a better pricetag.
3. These aren't my words, but they are accurate, so...Pocky is "overpriced, shit-dipped, compressed sawdust."
4. CLAMP is not art. It looks god awful. Seriously...a 3 year old could draw most of it. And there's a TON of wasted space on the pages, that includes dialog. There's seriously like...3 sentences on an entire damn page at BEST. And...hello, backgrounds? Those might be nice. What on earth are people reading those things for...all the teenage boys fondling each other? Save yourself the grief and check out a gay porn. You pervert.
5. While I'm on the subject...why are so few people reading American comic books? I know this because the graphic novel section of any given bookstore is infinitely smaller than the manga. Here's the trick though...comics...and manga...are the SAME THING. No, this isn't up for debate, you close-minded asshole. I could close my eyes and pick out of a lineup any given DC comic that's just as good if not better than any given manga, just pull your head out of your ass and go buy a trade or two, you ass.
6. Also while we're on the subject...the same goes for animation. The DCAU...Detective Comics animated universe is all really good. That includes the Teen Titans, which at first glance seems like an anime ripoff, but is so much more. And Avatar, which is inexplicably stuck on Nickelodeon, is amongst the finest animated series EVER made, and I think that literally ANY person can genuinely enjoy it.
7. Y'know, the more we keep labeling everything as a disorder, and then overdiagnosing every symptom that shows up, the less personal responsibility people seem to want to take. So here it is...eat less, pay attention in your fucking classes, and for the love of GOD...cheer up, emo kid.
8. CSI is terrible. Forensic investigators AREN'T first on the scene detectives, don't run extensive interviews, and don't run about firing guns. Scientists first, cops seco...well, usually not at all. And WHY are the lights ALWAYS off in that show no matter WHERE they go?!
9. Harry Potter is not dark. Yes, it's more mature than one might expect a kids' book to be. But the poorly written combination of cliche traumatic backstories, whiny teen angst, and people occasionally dying doesn't make it OMG DARK AND EVIL. Walk it off.
10. There's still no crying in baseball.
11. A lot of negative reviews I see about movies like The Departed and Clerks II talk about the harsh language. For movies like 300 and Sin City, many negative reviews bring up the violence. In both cases, the critic seems to think that these things are purely implemented for shock value. If you think this, then you are a fucking idiot. In the real world...people swear. A lot. Fuck is a word that can take the role of any word in a sentence, or even be inserted in the middle. And maybe, just maybe, when people fight with swords and guns what not...there's a lot of blood and dismemberment given all the sharp fucking objects and goddamn bullets. Just a thought.
12. Most techno/house/synth/whatever the fuck sounds the same. All reggaeton sounds the same. That is all.
13. You are still responsible for your actions when you are drunk. All of them. Drinking is, at most, an explanation, not an excuse. Besides, if you just man-the-fuck-up and apologize or make amends for whatever stupid thing you did, your friends are likely to forgive you. Simply own up to it.
14. A band doesn't become a sellout just because, god forbid, somebody ELSE heard about whatever pretentious crap band you used to be "in the know" about. If you're so shallow that popularity is even a variable in what music you listen to, then you're a cock juggling thundercunt.
15. If you have ever believed ANYthing in the recent Mac ad campaign with Justin Long and John Hodgman, then you probably wanna go be 'an hero' right about now. You probably don't know what that means, but go look it up on Encyclopedia Dramatica. And do it.
16. In fact...if you own any shiny, overpriced device with a very ironic "i" as a prefix, then stop complaining about whatever major corporations you hate, even though you buy Apple products, drink five dollar coffee from whatever yuppie cafe is around, and smoke five packs a day, and strongly consider becoming 'an hero.'
17. People of the opposite sex CAN be good friends without wanting to fuck each other. Similarly, in works of fiction, believe it or not fanfiction writers, two people of the same sex CAN be good friends without wanting to have sex with one another.
18. Putting things online doesn't mean you TOLD ANYone ANYthing. This includes feelings, relationships, plans, and stupid fucking drama. If you want someone to know something, call and say it, or tell them in person. Livejournal and Facebook DO NOT COUNT, so don't EXPECT people to know anything put up there.
19. Videogames are not board games. The way you play should always directly affect the outcome of the game...there should be, at the most, VERY little dumbshit luck, and bullshit handouts as possible. Meaning hacking, cheat codes, character unbalance, and questionable physics are BAD. In all situations. Similarly, games like Mario Kart and Mario Party which basically reward you for playing like shit are fundamentally flawed, along with the people who enjoy playing. If you enjoy that kinda thing...don't play videogames at all. Just go play some boardgames completely dependent on dice...or flip a coin...play a card game like War, whatever.
20. TL;DR
1. MTV is awful, and the enemy of all good things...particularly music. If you like it, I will view you as less of a person. Can't really help that. Same goes for reality television in general.
2. The Wii's titles thus far suck easily as much as PS3, and as much as Xbox 360's did when it arrived on scene. It hasn't yet proved to be a better system...just to have a better pricetag.
3. These aren't my words, but they are accurate, so...Pocky is "overpriced, shit-dipped, compressed sawdust."
4. CLAMP is not art. It looks god awful. Seriously...a 3 year old could draw most of it. And there's a TON of wasted space on the pages, that includes dialog. There's seriously like...3 sentences on an entire damn page at BEST. And...hello, backgrounds? Those might be nice. What on earth are people reading those things for...all the teenage boys fondling each other? Save yourself the grief and check out a gay porn. You pervert.
5. While I'm on the subject...why are so few people reading American comic books? I know this because the graphic novel section of any given bookstore is infinitely smaller than the manga. Here's the trick though...comics...and manga...are the SAME THING. No, this isn't up for debate, you close-minded asshole. I could close my eyes and pick out of a lineup any given DC comic that's just as good if not better than any given manga, just pull your head out of your ass and go buy a trade or two, you ass.
6. Also while we're on the subject...the same goes for animation. The DCAU...Detective Comics animated universe is all really good. That includes the Teen Titans, which at first glance seems like an anime ripoff, but is so much more. And Avatar, which is inexplicably stuck on Nickelodeon, is amongst the finest animated series EVER made, and I think that literally ANY person can genuinely enjoy it.
7. Y'know, the more we keep labeling everything as a disorder, and then overdiagnosing every symptom that shows up, the less personal responsibility people seem to want to take. So here it is...eat less, pay attention in your fucking classes, and for the love of GOD...cheer up, emo kid.
8. CSI is terrible. Forensic investigators AREN'T first on the scene detectives, don't run extensive interviews, and don't run about firing guns. Scientists first, cops seco...well, usually not at all. And WHY are the lights ALWAYS off in that show no matter WHERE they go?!
9. Harry Potter is not dark. Yes, it's more mature than one might expect a kids' book to be. But the poorly written combination of cliche traumatic backstories, whiny teen angst, and people occasionally dying doesn't make it OMG DARK AND EVIL. Walk it off.
10. There's still no crying in baseball.
11. A lot of negative reviews I see about movies like The Departed and Clerks II talk about the harsh language. For movies like 300 and Sin City, many negative reviews bring up the violence. In both cases, the critic seems to think that these things are purely implemented for shock value. If you think this, then you are a fucking idiot. In the real world...people swear. A lot. Fuck is a word that can take the role of any word in a sentence, or even be inserted in the middle. And maybe, just maybe, when people fight with swords and guns what not...there's a lot of blood and dismemberment given all the sharp fucking objects and goddamn bullets. Just a thought.
12. Most techno/house/synth/whatever the fuck sounds the same. All reggaeton sounds the same. That is all.
13. You are still responsible for your actions when you are drunk. All of them. Drinking is, at most, an explanation, not an excuse. Besides, if you just man-the-fuck-up and apologize or make amends for whatever stupid thing you did, your friends are likely to forgive you. Simply own up to it.
14. A band doesn't become a sellout just because, god forbid, somebody ELSE heard about whatever pretentious crap band you used to be "in the know" about. If you're so shallow that popularity is even a variable in what music you listen to, then you're a cock juggling thundercunt.
15. If you have ever believed ANYthing in the recent Mac ad campaign with Justin Long and John Hodgman, then you probably wanna go be 'an hero' right about now. You probably don't know what that means, but go look it up on Encyclopedia Dramatica. And do it.
16. In fact...if you own any shiny, overpriced device with a very ironic "i" as a prefix, then stop complaining about whatever major corporations you hate, even though you buy Apple products, drink five dollar coffee from whatever yuppie cafe is around, and smoke five packs a day, and strongly consider becoming 'an hero.'
17. People of the opposite sex CAN be good friends without wanting to fuck each other. Similarly, in works of fiction, believe it or not fanfiction writers, two people of the same sex CAN be good friends without wanting to have sex with one another.
18. Putting things online doesn't mean you TOLD ANYone ANYthing. This includes feelings, relationships, plans, and stupid fucking drama. If you want someone to know something, call and say it, or tell them in person. Livejournal and Facebook DO NOT COUNT, so don't EXPECT people to know anything put up there.
19. Videogames are not board games. The way you play should always directly affect the outcome of the game...there should be, at the most, VERY little dumbshit luck, and bullshit handouts as possible. Meaning hacking, cheat codes, character unbalance, and questionable physics are BAD. In all situations. Similarly, games like Mario Kart and Mario Party which basically reward you for playing like shit are fundamentally flawed, along with the people who enjoy playing. If you enjoy that kinda thing...don't play videogames at all. Just go play some boardgames completely dependent on dice...or flip a coin...play a card game like War, whatever.
20. TL;DR