Comments | halfshellvenus: SPN Gen Fiction: "To The Battlefield In Borrowed Armor" (PG-13)

halfshellvenus

SPN Gen Fiction: "To The Battlefield In Borrowed Armor" (PG-13)

Dec 31, 2009 00:56

Title: To The Battlefied In Borrowed Armor
Author: HalfshellVenus
Characters: Dean, John (Gen)
Rating: PG-13
Summary (Pre-Series): The first time Dean went on a solo hunt was eight months after Sam left for Stanford.
Author's Notes: For my switch_25 table ("Strength") and writers_choice ("Independence").

x-x-x-x-x

( It's time you learned how to handle this on your own... )

spn_pre_series, my_fic, sn_gen, switch_25, writers_choice

Comments 29

brigid_tanner December 31 2009, 13:17:53 UTC

Ouch. I was all warm and fuzzy from the last drabble, and now I just want to curl up in a ball and cry for Dean. I love the explanation for why Dean sleeps around so much. It makes so much sense. He's just not used to being on his own. Still wish just once he'd argued with his dad and told him family should be together. But that wouldn't be Dean. Beautifully written.

halfshellvenus December 31 2009, 20:43:24 UTC

He's just not used to being on his own. Still wish just once he'd argued with his dad and told him family should be together. But that wouldn't be Dean.

It really wouldn't. He rarely questions John's decisions, even when he disagrees with him, because he is the good soldier and the good son, and he lives for that approval. After losing everything at age 4, you cling to what's left, no matter the cost.

And the fact that being on his own IS hard for him is one of the reasons he needs to learn to do it. :(

tsuki_no_bara December 31 2009, 16:08:28 UTC

oh, dean. this is so sad and so him, how he hates being alone and can't ever really get used to it, and how nervous and insecure he is about being left behind. i like that he starts picking up women for the company, because he's just that lonely.

(seems kind of like john's teaching him to be more self-sufficient and a better hunter, so they can split up more and cover more ground, and also - possibly unintentionally and very ironically - so that dean's better prepared to survive without him. and i think dean's just not wired to be happy alone.)

halfshellvenus December 31 2009, 20:50:23 UTC

how he hates being alone and can't ever really get used to it, and how nervous and insecure he is about being left behind.
When you look at early S1, that "fear of abandonment" is still written all over Dean, but you can understand why his past would have made him that way. Distraction is the only thing that helps, since he can't change the situation (or won't, given that it's what John wants).

seems kind of like john's teaching him to be more self-sufficient and a better hunter, so they can split up more and cover more ground, and also - possibly unintentionally and very ironically - so that dean's better prepared to survive without him.
As a parent, John really should teach Dean to be more independent. Pushing him out of the nest is the only way that will happen, given who Dean is. And it's also the only way to make sure Dean can survive if something happens to John ( ... )

Dean is an angel. krisreinke January 1 2010, 19:34:54 UTC

Dean is an angel. Sam is a demon. (Well, fallen angel) And I don't mean either of those in a moral way - because from what I can see neither does Kripke. (Someday, someone is going to notice that Supernatural is the most transgressive and intellectually challenging piece of TV in... pretty much ever.) Dean exists for the approval of an all-knowing ( but...ooops... absent) Father. Sam has 'rebelled' time and again - seeing his own path no matter if it succeeds or ( ooops again) fails.

Hummm.

Makes you question what God really WANTS from his children. (And what they should expect from him.)

Like I say. If certain religuous folks were watching this- they'd bring pitchforks.

Re: Dean is an angel. halfshellvenus January 1 2010, 20:33:41 UTC

You're right, the parallels are all there.

I'm kind of sorry, actually, because I liked the show better when it wasn't strictly Christian allegory and was instead more about family with multicultural horrors from legends across the the globe.

But you describe the meta very well!

Thread 5

mdlaw December 31 2009, 17:35:11 UTC

This really speaks to the hollowness that Dean feels. m :I

halfshellvenus December 31 2009, 20:51:56 UTC

He so clearly hates being alone, but given his background I can understand it. Unfortunately, as hard as it is for him, it's a necessary part of becoming an adult-- even if he still avoids it as much as he can.

gunznammo2 December 31 2009, 23:34:05 UTC

Poor Dean. This is just another aspect of his family being torn apart. He had to find a way to deal with that. He did the best he could until he could get his family united again. It's why I fell in love with this character - his love for his family and his need to keep his family intact.

halfshellvenus January 1 2010, 03:30:07 UTC

It's why I fell in love with this character - his love for his family and his need to keep his family intact.
Me too. As a Hunter, he's 100% awesomeness. As a person, he's kind of a pig at times (especially where women are concerned), but his love for his family (and the deeper layers under that bravado surface) make all the difference in the world.

realpestilence January 1 2010, 13:07:26 UTC

Dean is a mix of "knows better" and "knows better and doesn't care" and "really *doesn't* know better", in how he is around other people, especially women. Anyone with the ability to love that deeply is worth the time you might need to put in to train him a bit...and considering how socially isolated he's been, more so than Sam or John, imo, it's not surprising he's off-kilter, you know? He's had more of a pseudo-military upbringing, with just enough memories of home/safety/mommy/loss to drive him; but without the stability to know how to form new bonds. Toss in the nomad lifestyle and...yeah, screwed up ( ... )

halfshellvenus January 1 2010, 20:42:03 UTC

Dean is a mix of "knows better" and "knows better and doesn't care" and "really *doesn't* know better", in how he is around other people, especially women.:D It's so true! There are times when he's truly clueless, but more often he simply chooses to ignore the path of "wisdom," let us say ( ... )

Thread 5

blackcat333_99 January 1 2010, 01:54:07 UTC

Man you just reminded me of how much John frustrates me as a father. On the one hand he is making Dean learn to ACT more independently, but he's doing it in such a way that it actually fosters a kind of codependency in Dean. Failing to teach him how to be *content* on his own.

halfshellvenus January 1 2010, 03:38:33 UTC

Man you just reminded me of how much John frustrates me as a father.
Frustrating but fascinating-- he's like a scab you can't leave alone, because he has brave and awesome qualities and he loves his boys, but not quite enough to put their best interests first. And god, how aggravating that is!

On the one hand he is making Dean learn to ACT more independently, but he's doing it in such a way that it actually fosters a kind of codependency in Dean. Failing to teach him how to be *content* on his own.
Of the many mistakes John made as a parent, I think his "conditional love" was one that was both extremely damaging (especially to Dean) but also the most invisible to John himself. I can so easily see him thinking, given that Dean's 22 and still clinging so tightly, that he's going to have to push him out of the nest a little because Dean won't fly on his own.

But John just can't see that Dean's afraid of being alone for a reason or that pushing him away might make him all the more anxious ( ... )

blackcat333_99 January 1 2010, 06:08:41 UTC

He is interesting, although I'll admit that I find Sammy's grayness to be more fascinating because I can see WHY he's made the choices he makes, I understand why there's some two steps forward, one step back stuff going on with him. But John... I think his biggest flaw was a lack of awareness of the importance of communication. And I know this is a very real human flaw, and even understandable to a certain extent when taking their family history into consideration... but I guess it's one of those personal buttons of mine that never forgets he had other choices that he could have made, done things differently with his boys without sacrificing his agenda -- their safety AND revenge on Mary's killer -- in the process. Their lives would still have been rather similar to what they ultimately experienced, but had he simply communicated more with his sons even while holding to the same path... how different things most likely would now be for both Sam and Dean. And since I love the boys most of all... well ( ... )

halfshellvenus January 1 2010, 20:48:29 UTC

although I'll admit that I find Sammy's grayness to be more fascinating because I can see WHY he's made the choices he makes, I understand why there's some two steps forward, one step back stuff going on with him.
Yes-- it pains me that Sam's choices are often for the right reasons, but leading in the wrong direction. And I hate to see where this show has already taken him, with the events of last season.

that never forgets he had other choices that he could have made, done things differently with his boys without sacrificing his agenda -- their safety AND revenge on Mary's killer -- in the process.
Exactly-- it isn't just what you do, it's HOW you do it. My own father shares some of John's weaknesses, and so those "deciding based on what YOU want without regard to how it affects your children" is a sore subject with me. Except that John added the component of treating his boys like soldiers instead of beloved children, and god what a difference that makes.

The cause and effect he has on his boys, their ways of reacting to him and ( ... )