ends here.  It's that time of year again, folks, and that means a new story, which will be appearing starting November!  Yee-ha!  Aren't you excited?  I know I am... 

The chapters are in backwards order cuz I posted 'em as I finished 'em.  For that same reason they're full of typos.  Whatcha gonna do?

Yes, we know that Bret Farve is not a hockey player but the quarterback for the Green Bay Packers. We had a momentary lapse of memory. Give us a freakin' break, people.

When Bismuth went to work the next day, feeling forlorn and hopeless and anticipating with glum resignation his upcoming death at the hands of the royal executioners, there were a pair of men in blue business suits and fedoras waiting for him ( Read more... )

"This is ass," said Bismuth Sub-salicylate again ( Read more... )

When Doris Myelin, who was otherwise known as Binky, was born to Donker Block and Fruit Bat Tarcathian in the wee hours of the night one frigid July morning, as the anchovy trees were blooming their pungent fruit and the great composer Mundeka was pressing the first note to his last symphonic composition, the Death of Delilah suite. Fruit Bat had ( Read more... )

His name was Doris Myelin, and he was also known as Binky, and as we mentioned some time before this, he was the king at the time of Bismuth Sub-salicylate and Ann-Marie Roche-Moutonnee and the owner of that prized tom turkey whom he affectionately called Snookums ( Read more... )

Yes, I think that that will do nicely. And it was indeed an unexpected return, oh yes. Because, as you may very well recall, that scheming, self-serving ass that we all know as the former advisor to the king, old Dinkplutter Bump, had told the entire populace that their former king had been tragically gored by a raging bull jackalope while out ( Read more... )

The king of Mirrglbury was at this time having a sumptuous and extremely expensive royal banquet - at the expense of the royal municipal treasury of course - and I of course mean the king of Mirrglbury who had once been the royal giver of wise advice to the king, old Dinkplutter Bump, who had usurped the throne from the true king, young Jorkulhaup ( Read more... )

"Hello," said the wooly mammoth. "I am a wooly mammoth. What are you ( Read more... )