So today, I found a rip of the drama CD that comes with DVD 5. If I were to describe it, I'd say it's a combination of GARhalla Vice and Campus Lagann. In other words, CANON HIGH SCHOOL AU!!!
Here's a download. For those who don't know Japanese, I've started translating it. However, because it takes me a quite a long time (just this part took like half a day), I'll be splitting it into three parts. Part 1 here goes up to the 9 minute mark. Enjoy!
Leeron: Chinponponpon~ The following drama has nothing to do with the actual Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann. It's one more Gurren Lagann. It has nothing at all to do with the actual beastmen-chan, Gurren-dan-chan, Spirals-chan, and Anti-Spirals-chan, sorry! This was your Leeron! *creepy kissing noises*
*sound of a train and someone getting their ass kicked*
Yakuza 1: What the- what was that for?!
Yakuza 2: You pickin' a fight with us Ginbu-kai?!
Kamina: Ouououou! I don't know of no Ginbu-kai, but I won't allow any more of your violence!
Yakuza 2: What did you say?! Who the hell are you?!
Kamina: Bastard, you're sure unqualified if you don't know my name. ALL RIGHT, YOU PUNKS! LISTEN WELL! One who gathers up this city's, this prefecture's, no...this Japan's roughneck students and points to the path of men! This world's number one roughneck! That's me, Kamino Kamina-sama! Carve that into your minds!
Kamina: OTOKO IPPIKI GURREN LAGANN! After this, a cool theme song was supposed to come on, but due to limited time and budget, it had to be cut! Play the theme song in your souls! Now, let's go on to the story!!
Yoko: Good morning!
Tetsukan: ...mmn, good morning.
Yoko: Tetsukan, were you up all night again?
Tetsukan: It's a family thing.
Yoko: Huh? It's sure rare to see you in the classroom in the morning, Kamina.
Kamina: Shut up, I'm busy right now.
Yoko: I heard that you were beating up some gangsters in the city again yesterday?
Kamina: Because they were picking a fight with an old lady who was passing by.
Yoko: That's fine, but they were yakuza, right? If you're not careful, someday you'll get into some real trouble. Hey! What are you doing?!
Kamina: Can't you see for yourself? I'm reading a textbook.
Yoko: Ohhh yeah, if you fail today's test, you'll have to repeat a year, right? No wonder you're desperate.
Kamina: My dead old man told me I have to at least graduate from this school. Or else I'd have quit a long time ago.
Yoko: So there's some part of you like your dad after all. In that case, you should just study properly every day. If you're just going on borrowed knowledge...
Kamina: Shut up! All right, listen well! My borrowed knowledge burns with the soul of man! It's completely different from just any other loafer!
Yoko: Okay, okay. But you know, that's an English textbook. What we're having is a physics test.
Kamina: ........Ph-physics?
Yoko: Yup!
Kamina: ...I'm studying for both! If I study English, I should do okay in physics!
Yoko: Impossible.
Kamina: No, it's not!
Yoko: Even if you're in the spirit, some things are just impossible!
Kamina: .....DAMMIIIIT! I AM...I AM SUCH A MORON!!!!
*distant sound of a motorcycle*
Attenborough: Mm?! What, what?! Who's that guy with the sleeveless school uniform?!
Tetsukan: Riding a motorcycle at this hour....*yawn* that's just some delinquent.
Kittan: KAMINAAA! IS KAMINA HERE?! From Bachika High, Kurono Kittan-sama is here to settle things once and for all! Today, I'll teach you who's the toughest in this city!!
Yoko: That fighting idiot is here! Don't bother with him today, Kamina- wait, he's gone!
Kamina: I was already feeling pissed, this is perfect! I'll beat you to a pulp again, Kittan!
Nia: Wait there, Kamina-kun.
Kamina: ?! Board chairman?!
Boota: Buuiu!
Nia: Please don't address me in such a formal way. "Nia" is fine.
Kamina: Right...
Nia: Kamina-kun, what does the slogan on the wall say? "Don't run in the halls." Isn't that what is written? Can you read it? Doooon't ruuuun iiiin theeee...
Kamina: The hall, right?! Yes, I read it!
Nia: Then you won't run anymore, right?
Boota: Biuubiuubiuubuu!
Kamina: Yes, I won't run! I'll walk quickly! (Besides that, why is our board chairman a woman and a kid and a foreigner? And she's got some pig, or mole, or whatever-kind-of-animal on her shoulder too.)
Boota: Buhhi!
Nia: Isn't he cute? His name is "Boota."
Simon: Kamina-san.
Kamina: ?! What's with you?
Nia: This is Hotta Simon-kun from the lower secondary school.
Kamina: What's a Junior want with me?
Simon: I don't care if you get in a fight, but I'd like to ask you not to damage the school building. It's up to me, the Maintenance Department, to fix it all.
Kamina: The Maintenance Department?
Nia: "Maintenance" means to build and repair the building. The reason why this school is made of wood is because we want the students to repair it themselves! Our Maintenance Department is the top runner in repairing schools! It is thanks to Simon-kun's toolbox that this school is so pretty!
Simon: She calls it the Maintenance Department, but really it's only me...
Kamina: Get a professional to do it, board chairman!
Nia: It is all right. After all, Simon-kun is skilled enough to have won in the National Junior High Maintenance Competition!
Simon: She says national, but only three schools actually participated...
Kamina: Ahh...that's immoral.
Simon: That's why it would be a problem if you damage the school building. Please remember that.
*sound of water*
Nia: Ah, Simon-kun! A water pipe exploded over there! At this rate, the school building will be flooded!
Simon: I understand. Let's detach the floorboards. Spin, my electric drill.
*drilling*
Nia: Kamina-kun, please help us.
Kamina: But I've got someone waiting...
Nia: It's all right, now hurry!
Boota: Buubuubiuubuu!
Kamina: Ahh, wait, but...!
Kittan: He's late...he's so late! ...That idiot, what is he doing?! Hurry and come out! Kaminaaa! KAMINAAAA!
*footsteps*
Kittan: Who the hell are you guys? *gets knocked out* ...Damn it... *collapses*
Dayakka: Okay, Kamina? We'll excuse it this time, but if you miss a test again, you'll be out.
*Kamina sneezes*
Dayakka: Well, we do think it's unfortunate that the board chairman made you come with her, but...who was the physics teacher again?
Leeron: Why, that's me, Dayakka-sensei!
Dayakka: Rino-sensei, please don't call me "Dayakka." My proper name is "Daya Kaizou."
Leeron: Don't worry about the small things! You can call me "Leeron" too. Right, Kamina?
Kamina: I will call you Rino Ronta-sensei!
Leeron: So young, but so stubborn. Of course, that's what I like...
Kamina: Don't say stuff like that!
Dayakka: Anyway, by request of the board chairman, you dug up every one the water pipes in the school to confirm their strength. That's hard work. I think you guys are impressive to have finished by evening.
Kamina: Heh, you could say that!
Leeron: That Junior High student Simon was pretty impressed. He said that was the first time he'd seen anyone take off the floorboards faster than his drill.
Simon: We have to detach the floor all over the school or we won't know where the leak is.
Kamina: Yaaarrgh! Once a man has decided to do something, he won't run, retreat, or look back! Even if my nails were to come off, there's no way I can lose to a Junior!! *spraying of water* What the?! Bastard, I won't stand losing to a water pipe!!!
Simon: (Amazing...what's with this person's power? Okay, I'll do it too. Spin, my electric drill!!!)
Dayakka: Amazing...or rather, stupid.
Kamina: Of course! No matter when, I have the perfect combustion of a man's soul!
Leeron: In that case, in place of the test, write a report before the weekend. Be sure to do that with "perfect combustion" too.
Kamina: ...ehh?
(LINK TO PART 2) EDIT: Hmm...are those two yakuza at the beginning Zoushi and Kidd? XD I have a hard time recognizing their voices...