Pushing

[gundam083]

Drowning in pain
from what I cant have
to this day I have not broken
the surface of this lake.

yet I fight and fight
to hold my breath
beneath these
Mighty waves.

I can't help but think that
I have been pushing you away
pushing you away
pushing you away from me.

Inside I burn with an
anger toward myself,
empty inside I am dying
I am trying to make my way
from under this weight
I have held on to
so long over time.

I want to be free
but I can't help but
pushing you away,
pushing you away
pushing you away
away from as
I flounder here on the bottom
dying and crying for how ever
small my crimes may be to you
or any other who has
fallen under my spell.

Now and only now can I rest,
In the solitude of
my own lake of tears
resting quietly
on the bottom of all this guilt
I cant help but keep
pushing you away.