The Legacy of Malkior

Dec 04, 2004 16:26

/Edit : Tried to fix everything deltashade pointed out with some typos.
The Legacy of Malkior: Part One )

old writing

Leave a comment

Comments 1

deltashade December 4 2004, 16:54:25 UTC
Nitpicky Spelling and Grammar Time! (Decipherable typos not included.)

"to never be read" - Try to not ever split infinitives. It should be "never to be read".
No "o" in "hydraulics".
I think Star's home planet is spelled "Tameran", but I'm not sure.

And the actual review.

Before even reading it, I and, like, eight other people squeed.

You know and write the characters so well that I can actually picture this scenario going on. And I don't know how many more ways I can say that I love it. So yeah. Write more, please.

Reply


Leave a comment

Up