{Video Post - ACCIDENTALLY PUBLIC - Week 1 Day 3}
[When the feed starts, it's at a strange angle--tilted up, as though Sakura is not interested in keeping her face center but rather on speaking into the receiver. What can be seen, though, is this: steam, and Sakura's hair pinned up away from her neck, slightly damp from humidity. That and she's wearing a very peeved expression. The flush across
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[The post is very pointedly video, and he's certainly keeping his face in the center of the screen, as anyone should.] Having fun?
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Who's--
[Kisame's grinning face. Kisame's--
--face.
Which she is seeing.
Which means he can see her.]
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When she turns it back up, only her face is visible, and it is definitely red from embarrassment, now.]
How did you hear this?
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[Kisame is only laughing harder still at Sakura's reaction, Hitomi moving further back to show the dramatic little flourish he's making for her. He himself is fully clothed, after all. Why should he need to hide anything?]
You might want to double-check the settings before you put anything up, you know; this is definitely a public post.
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You should probably change the settings on this if you can, Sakura-chan.... Do you know where they took your clothing?
[Trying to help recover her outfit for her, after all, is the least he can do.]
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I don't think I can change the post.
[She's grumbling now.]
I... don't know where they went. Over the wall, last I saw, but I didn't follow.
[For OBVIOUS REASONS.]
... How did you hear this? I only called Iruka-sensei.
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This doesn't seem to be a call at all, Sakura-chan; it's a public video post. Would you like me to go look for your little thieves?
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... Yeah, if you could. I kind of...
[Can't go anywhere.]
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That’s.
Sakura.
Naked.
Sakura is naked. (he’s pretty sure she is anyway)
Also, wet.
And flushed.
And wet.
…
And naked.
And with her hair pinned up Naruto can see her neck and he thinks it might be nice to see her hair pinned up a little more often because like that she just looks-
The water helps. And the steam.
And the naked.
And there are shoulders (bare shoulders!) as the Hitomi tilts and Naruto’s brain screams: KEEP TILTING!
Or maybe that’s his libido. Either way it doesn’t show him all he would like to see and he lets out a mournful sound, realises that he’s sporting a bit of a nosebleed and lifts a hand to wipe his nose.
He shouldn’t say anything.
She will freak out.
Possibly, she will kill him the next time she sees him,
He shouldn’t say anything.
He replays the post one last time (if he’s going to die he’d like this image to be the predominant one in his mind when he does.)
He really can’t let her just remain oblivious. He should let her know. He ( ... )
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[All right, she squeaks. Only a little but. She does. Before she catches his hand over his nose and she narrows her eyes dangerously at him because she can tell what he'd been thinking. She just can.
She opens her mouth to give him a sharp rebuke.]
No, I don't--
[Except.
She really does need clothes. Who knows if Gai will find the little monsters who stole hers?
And at least he's trying to pretend he hadn't gawked.
Sullenly, she sinks back down into the water until nothing but her face can be seen.]
... Yes. If you're in the area, anyway. I'd appreciate it.
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[ Even if he wasn’t, this would be his response.
And okay maybe he’s not exactly in the area but he is almost in the area and it would not be the difficult for him to be in the area and he realises a little too late that it would have been prudent had his reply not have come out as enthusiastic as it did.
Oops.]
I mean, sure! I can just drop them by and-
[He glances at the Hitomi, finds Sakura’s up to her chin in the water, and cannot stop the disappointment from flitting across his expression. Well damn.
She’ll have to come out when he gets there anyway, right?]
Uh…
[He promptly loses his train of thought, sniffs back the blood and coughs awkwardly.]
It's not a problem!
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Uzumaki Naruto, if you so much as accidentally get a peek of me, I will make you regret it for the rest of your life.
[Delivered with deadly calm. Just test her. Go ahead. See how well that works for you.]
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Admittedly, he doesn't love her anymore, but she is still an attractive woman. And it's a bit of a pity that he never did get the chance for there to be a next time.
...The steam is also quite lamentable.]
Having a bit of trouble, Sakura? I see these obnoxious little creatures are afflicting Konoha as well.
I don't think it's wise of you to rely on that perverted teacher, however. Self-discipline doesn't appear to be his strong point.
...I suppose I could take time out of my busy schedule to assist you though, as a favor to my former wife. You already know that my control is quite impeccable, after all.
No strings attached, of course, if you'll pardon the pun.
[Even if making use of his strings when Sakura is in such a compromising situation could be quite
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No, I think I'll be fine. Thanks.
[That last could not have been more sarcastic if she'd tried.]
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Now now, no need to be shy. It seems clear that you can't handle this little problem on your own.
You were almost always conscientious about letting me work on my projects in peace, but I assure you there's no need to concern yourself about interfering with my work in this case as I don't have any pressing matters to attend to at the moment. It'd really be no trouble at all for me to help you out.
In fact, I suppose I could say that it'd be my pleasure to assist you.
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[Positively growling at him.]
I don't want your help.
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Saaa-ku-ra~
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[Sakura fairly explodes, and is just barely able to contain herself.
She turns the Hitomi face down for a couple of seconds while she regains her composure. She looks calmer but the blush hasn't receded an inch.]
Those... things. Messed with my Hitomi. No one was supposed to see--
[Oh so flustered!]
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