HU RA!

[groucho_kitty]

What I need to do is figure out where the line is for me that I completely forgive someone (whether it be a very big issue or a..."minor insult") by completely forgive them I mean I want to be able to shrug my shoulders with however people treat me and move on without a second thought. I want to be responsible for my own actions, what I say and

Comments

[sean0505]

It's always hard to manage your past with what you have gone through while trying to learn the lesson from your past yet not projecting those fears into the present. Much easier said than done!

I think forgiveness takes time and for certain things it just never happens. All you can do is have faith in who you are and the direction you want you life to go and try to see if the person really wants forgiveness or cares about you enough to try and change the issues between you both

hmmm

[groucho_kitty]

interesting, but thats the thing, I don't want my forgivness to depend on whether or not I think that the other person "wants it enough" who am I to decide someones motives? I have been so burned with discrepancied between what people say and what they end up doing. Some people say the perfect thing, and only after can you see that they were completely fake. My point was that it HAS to come from me and in me, and the rest shouldn't matter. well at least thats what I hope for, it feels like thats the only way to really get closure. I do agree though... all you can really do is have faith in who you are and the direction you want to go. Maybe its the only thing left to really have faith in. (well I believe in god, but I mean as far as other people go) I know that sounds verry pessimistic and so full of the kind of content of a defense mechanism that only drags you down. but I don't know what else to say. I suppose I might change my outlook as I experience different things in my life, but as for right now.. the only thing I can ever be

Re: hmmm

[sean0505]

That's more of what I was referring to, the people who put forth effort as a majority rather than when it’s convenient for them or when it suits their needs.

In the past I have used Moving as a sort of gauge. Only people who truly care about you and for you tend to help you move. The other's will makes excuses about how they cannot help or will help but are half assed or complain the whole time.

It takes a special person for put forth that kind of effort for someone one without anything in return. These are the people who do deserve forgiveness when they mess up, but then usually the people who care about us most won't be put in a position to hurt us.

maybe everything that helps me learn is worth it

[groucho_kitty]

agreed

[shakewell]

i almost commented after reading the first 'graph but you came to the point i wanted to make there in second one. it's great to forgive others for the transgressions against you but you must remember to learn from your mistake that allowed it to happen, especially if you forgive that someone and let them back into your life as if nothing had changed!