Denim
Pairing: Do you even need to ask anymore? :P
Genre: Romance
Rating: T
Summary: There were only five times in the span of their relationship that Puck ever saw Rachel in jeans...
Rachel Berry was a skirt kind of girl. And as it turned out, over time, Puck became a skirt kind of guy. Skirts just seemed to be the staple of Rachel Berry, one of her many signatures, her way of telling everybody exactly who she was.
For as long as he could remember, Rachel Berry had worn a skirt. On their first date, with a thigh scraping, eye boggingly daring plaid skirt, on the road to regionals with a red, school pride themed bubble skirt. There had been a skirt to honour every occasion in her life. But, every once in a while, she changed.
Puck could only recall five occasions in their entire relationship in which she had worn jeans and they were moments that were distinct and precious.
The first time had been something rare, something that, when he thought back on it later on his life brought him shivers. The day his daughter was born.
Quinn went into labour around 7pm on Saturday 15th April. They’d all been on Spring Break, minding their own business and he had been in the middle of a vicious game of Assassins Creed II when he got the call. Quinn’s voice was frail and shaky over the phone as she gasped out simply, ‘She’s coming...’
Instantly, Puck had swept himself out of the house, forgetting a jacket, forgetting socks, forgetting to tell his mother where he was going. His heart was thudding and he was freaking out. He sped to the hospital to find Quinn lying in a bed, gasping and crying and Finn standing stoically in the corner of the room.
The room had been silent and it stayed that way, Finn and Puck glancing at each other as they passed. They took turns holding Quinn’s hand as each contraction passed and they waited patiently for the daughter that neither of them knew they would love.
The nurse kicked them out at midnight to check on Quinn and the two boys stood in the hall, silence descending on them uncomfortably. Finn fiddled with his phone, shooting a mass text off to the rest of the Glee club. Q’s having her baby tonight.
He still couldn’t quite wrap his mind around it. His flesh and DNA, his blood was being born. Tonight. He was going to have a daughter. That couldn’t be real.
He was only sixteen.
The nurse called them back in and told them that Quinn would need all the support she could get as she went into the final stages of labour. For once, for the first time since their falling out, Puck and Finn worked together, holding her hands, urging her to breath as she screamed and grunted.
At 1:47am on Sunday the 16th of April, Baby Drizze Fabray was born into the world, kicking and screaming. For a moment they all stood breathless, watching the red writhing mass, the enormity rendering them breathless.
Puck couldn’t explain the way his heart twisted as he looked at the baby, the silence and comfort he felt at the innate knowledge that she was his.
But as soon as the baby was his, she ceased to be. They lay her down on an exhausted Quinn’s chest and Quinn began to cry as Finn pushed her sweaty hair off her forehead. Quinn murmured something to the nurse and like that, the baby was stolen from his sight. He knew then and there, that he’d never see that baby again, that she was no longer his. He’d gone from everything to nothing in a matter of a few moments. Where did he turn?
Suddenly, overcome with a rare display of emotion, Puck sprinted from the room, gasping for air. What had just happened?
He stumbled out into the waiting room, tearing off his paper gown, clawing at the scrub cap on his head as his mind swum with panicked, scared thoughts.
And then he found her.
Rachel was alone, sitting in the waiting room, her tiny frame curled up in a plastic chair, wearing a baggy sweatshirt and jeans that she’d evidently grabbed from the top of her drawer. Her dark eyes probed him gently and she bit her lip, ducking her head.
‘Noah...’
For a fleeting moment he considered turning around and running in the opposite direction but he suddenly found he didn’t have the strength to. He doubled over, gasping for air desperately.
Rachel stood up, her face brave and open as she approached him. He waited for a Berry speech, for a long winded congratulations but instead...
She held open her arms.
‘Noah,’ she murmured softly, ‘It’ll be okay...’
And he crumpled.
He fell into her arms, the alarmed voice in the back of his head screaming his embarrassment, but he couldn’t hold it. He was defeated, done fighting, done trying. He just wanted to scream...
Rachel was only tiny and she struggled to wrap her arms around him fully, but held tight as his entire frame wracked with sobs.
‘Sshh...’ she murmured softly, her small hands running up and down his back, ‘It’ll be okay. It’ll be okay,’ she promised.
As he cried, she simply held him, content to be a shoulder for him if he needed.
Finally, when the cries slowed, Rachel looked up at him through her large, shimmery eyes. Gently she led him into the plastic seat beside her.
‘Noah, do you want to talk about it?’
‘Why are you here?’ he asked abrasively.
She shrugged, pushing her hands into the pockets of her jeans, ‘I got Finn’s text at midnight. I thought that perhaps, in all the hustle and bustle, you’d like someone to lean on.’
Even his distraught and hazed mind, that thought registered in the back of his mind. She wasn’t here for Finn.
‘Me?’
She nodded, biting her lip, ‘Yes, I thought that everyone would be fussing over Quinn and Finn would be valiant and make decisions and be helpful and that... that maybe when you left the hospital, you’d want someone to talk to.’
‘You’ve been waiting here for nearly two hours for me?’
She nodded again, her eyes full of earnest emotion, ‘I thought you might need it Noah.’
‘What should I do Berry?’
She shook her head sadly, her head coming to rest on his shoulder, ‘I don’t know Noah. I think that you need to go back to Quinn, if you think you’re strong enough. I think you need to be with her right now, because what you’re feeling, she feels twice as sad and twice as angry. That was her baby. Her first baby and she just had to make the hardest decision a mother could ever make. You need to stay by her side and let her know that you support her.’
‘But I...’
‘It wasn’t your decision to make Noah. I know it hurts and I’m sad for you, but it was Quinn who would always live with her decision. Now, you need to support her.’
Puck nodded grimly, pushing himself to his feet, ‘Okay. I’m going to. If you say that’s what she needs...’
He ambled toward the door, suddenly turning around to look at Rachel.
‘Hey, Berry... are you going to be around when I come back?’
She shrugged, ‘I can if you want me to be Noah.’
‘I’d like that... I’d like someone to talk to I think.’
Rachel nodded, smiling softly, ‘Okay. I’ll talk to you later. I’ll wait here for you.’
And she did. When he came out an hour later, Quinn’s tears still fresh in his mind, she was still there, curled up in her chair ready for him. Gently, as her eyes locked with his, she stood up and her fingers laced with his. That night she was his saving grace, his one reason to live, the only thing that made him feel alive when it felt like his whole world had been snatched away from him. It was the moment he realized the Rachel Berry was there for him, no matter what.
The second time didn’t occur until a year later. It had been a whirlwind year as they began a period that he referred to as ‘After Drizzle’ even though Rachel kindly pointed out that the initials A.D were already occupied and had been for a very long period of time. In the time of A.D things resumed as they had always been; Quinn bounced back, peppy and fiery, ready to reclaim her spot as Head Cheerleader as she vehemently denied knowledge of the baby that no one was allowed to talk about. Glee went into its usual exuberant rehearsals, ready to win Nationals this year after an embarrassing defeat and he went back to being Puck. Between Drizzle and the January of his junior year he had coaxed Santana into bed (or rather into truck he supposed) along with a slew of sexy messages from girls he barely knew. Things were the same.
Almost.
There were two changes that he noted between the periods before and after Drizzle and they both had to do with one Rachel Berry. For one, she had become a constant in his life. Whether he liked it or not (it was usually a not) she was always around. There was something about the way she always knew when she had to be there, the moments when he was and wasn’t going to talk, the moments that he’d never admit to, but the moments that he would need someone to hold him. And somehow, she was always there.
So, she had become a perpetual presence. She was there, walking home in the rain with him, she was there at the mall, chattering his ear off, and she was there at the pizza parlour every Tuesday night without fail.
But then, there was another change.
Heartbroken and destroyed from Quinn’s betrayal, Puck hadn’t been the only one to turn to Berry. Finn, suddenly deciding that it was high time he had a girlfriend again, hastened to Rachel’s side, professing how wrong he’d been for ignoring the one girl who always got him. Rachel melted into his arms and the two of them bounced around the campus, glowing and smiling at one another in a way that made Puck’s stomach turn.
So, it was a surprise when he walked into school on a Monday morning to find something new.
As he walked through the halls, he nodded at his football buddies, leered at the geeks with the high waisted shorts and growled and glared at the lame hockey dudes. He winked at a passing group of freshman and wolf-whistled at Santana and her band of merry sluts. All in all, a typical morning. Until...
He turned a corner and strutted down the hall, whistling gleefully on his way to his locker. He was making a point of showing up for school today: it was pizza day at the cafeteria and he wasn’t one to pass up a good lunch. As she turned to reach his locker, he stopped dead in his tracks. Something was different. Standing before him was Rachel Berry, hunched over, her face veiled by her locker.
The reason he stopped was the reason he knew something was dreadfully wrong. His usually impeccable and well (if not outlandishly) dressed girl was standing in front of her locker wearing jeans.
Something was definitely wrong, because he knew how much Berry’s skirts meant to her, how much of her confidence relied on the ability to rock those minis. And today she was wearing jeans.
‘Berry?’ he asked, slamming his locker shut and ambling toward her, ‘What’s uh... what’s up?’
Rachel’s jolted at the sound of his voice and slowly she revealed her face from behind her locker door.
As soon as she locked eyes with him, her lip quivered, ‘Uh... Noah...’ she began evenly, her voice controlled and smooth, ‘Good morning. It is a... uh...’
‘Berry? What’s up?’ Puck repeated, taking a few more steps toward him, ‘Come on... you can tell me...’
Rachel bit down firmly on lip and shook her head, ‘Uh, no. No, I don’t think I can. I’m going to go to class now...’
Finally, Puck shortened the gap between them, laying one hand on her arm. Rachel stared at him for a long moment, before front finally wavered.
Her lips began to quiver and her the corners of her mouth fell, her shoulders hunching around herself protectively and her eyes glistened. She shook her head, pressing her lips together firmly.
‘He broke up with me,’ she cried softly, the first tear slipping down her cheek, ‘He... he told me that we couldn’t see each other anymore and that... Quinn...’
Her voice broke on the other girls name and her body began to shake with sobs.
‘Woah!’ he cried, ‘Um... okay... well... uh...’
He didn’t do crying girls. He made the girls cry, he didn’t help them do it... There really ought to be a manual for this situation. So he did the only thing he could, the one thing she’d done for him a year before, the one thing that had helped to heal his breaking heart.
He wrapped his arms around her tiny shoulders, crushing her to his chest. He smoothed her hair tenderly, hoping that he could impart just a little comfort upon her.
As her cries slowed Puck slowly released her, so she was standing at arms length, both of his hands planted firmly on her shoulders.
‘Hey,’ he said softly, reaching out with the pad of his thumb to swipe away one single liquid diamond resting on her cheek, ‘Listen to me. No dude, Finn or not, is worth your tears okay?’
Rachel looked up him, watery and sniffly with doleful eyes but nodded nevertheless.
‘So uh... no more crying okay? Because, he doesn’t deserve it...’
She nodded again slowly, her breathing evening out gently. She shook her head, an embarrassed flush rising up her cheeks.
‘I’m sorry Noah, I didn’t mean to... catch you off guard. I didn’t want you to see my like that.’
‘No biggie,’ he shrugged, ‘I already think you’re crazy, it was just icing on the cake. Plus, you’re still hot, so I don’t care.’
Rachel smiled weakly, shaking her head disbelievingly, ‘I ought to be offended by that…’
‘Yeah, you probably should. I’m a bad dude.’
Rachel’s face fell a little, ‘Not as bad as him. You’d never be as bad to him. Not to me.... what do I do about him Noah?’
She looked up at him hopefully and for a second his heart broke a little. So, he reached out his arm, ruffling her already mussed curls teasingly.
‘You sex it up on Friday night at the mall and get back in the game. Don’t let him know that he got to you...’
‘But I’m so embarrassed...’
‘Rachel!’
They both turned at the sound of Finn’s voice coming from the other end of the corridor. Rachel’s eyes filled with panic and she tensed beneath his hands.
Puck nodded sadly, ‘Come on Berry, lets get out of here.’
Rachel looked around, bewildered, ‘But... Noah, school hasn’t even started yet.’
‘School’s overrated. Let’s get some pizza and then watch some crap movie okay? You’ll be better off with me than at school today. I promise...’
He held out a hand, meeting her eyes gently. He smiled and cocked his head, ‘You coming Berry?’
She took a deep breath, glancing briefly back at Finn who was waiting expectantly for her to come to him. Her jaw set and she straightened her shoulders, her hand slipping into his. She smiled and squeezed his hands.
‘Yeah, I’m coming.’
The third time marked a sweeter occasion, a time when nobody needed to cry. Now fast approaching their senior year, Puck spent his summer with Rachel. For once it didn’t surprise him because he’d finally realized how much he liked her company and that, once he got over the chattiness, she could easily be the best friend anyone could ever desire.
So, they spent their finally high school summer together harassing the town. They laid out in the sun at the public pool, they met up with Santana and Brittany for an ongoing, three month waging Super Soaker war, and travelled hours for lame theme parks. They spent their hours in between holding hands and talking about everything (it wasn’t hard with the world’s greatest conversationalist in the pair). The record still declared them as friends, but only because he was too pansy-assed to ask the girl to be his girlfriend, but they did almost everything a normal couple would.
The summer was drawing somewhat to a close, with only two meagre sun soaked weeks before they returned to school as seniors. He had full intentions of sitting in front of his TV with his Xbox for the whole day because in a few weeks time he’d have to schedule other things in around Xbox. His plans were going well and his day seemed promising until he heard something rapping at his front door.
With a groan, Puck got up, brushing the tortilla chip crumbs off his pyjama pants and padded down the stairs. Scowl in place he flung open the door, ready to hurl abuse at whoever the moron was that interrupted his brilliant plans.
But it was Berry.
She was standing there on his doorstep, bright eyed and smiley, her copious curls scooped into a bouncy ponytail and a pair of denim capris hugging her hips sexily. Who the hell was he to say no?
‘Berry...’ he greeted slowly, his eyes sliding up her body, taking a moment to appreciate the way her tank top clung to the curve of her breasts.
Rachel shook her head, tutting with a roll of her eyes, ‘I’m not here for you, in fact I’m insulted that you would insinuate such a thing.’
‘You’re at my house... but you’re not here for me?’ Puck asked disbelievingly, scoffing.
Rachel nodded primly, playful defiance flashing in her eyes, ‘I’m here on secret women’s business...’
Puck frowned, ‘Secret Women’s...’
Suddenly it dawned on him and he turned, hollering over his shoulder, ‘SARAH!’
His little sister scurried out from whatever hole she had been hiding in and appeared by Puck’s side, a squeal rising in her throat as she saw Berry.
‘Rachel!’ she shrieked, launching herself at the older girl, ‘You came!’
‘Of course I did. A woman can’t ignore another woman’s plea for help,’ Rachel informed her, wrapping her arms around his little sister.
‘Sarah called you?’ he demanded.
Rachel nodded, a small smile playing on her lips, ‘She needed some advice, woman to woman...’
‘You’re here to see my sister?’ he continued, still dumbfounded.
‘Yes, now, Puck, you can go back to your Xbox game...’
He frowned as Sarah led Rachel by the hand into their living room, ‘Are you sure? I mean, like I could come in here and chill with you girls or whatever...’
Rachel laughed, shaking her head, ‘No. I’ve got it. Have fun, I’ll keep Sarah company for a while.’
‘Uh... okay...’ he said slowly.
With that, the two girls disappeared into the living room amidst rising giggles. As he sat in his bedroom, he found his mind wandering from the game. Berry was down there, chattering to his sister, their laughter and shrieks of delight rising through the floorboards. What were they doing? Why did Sarah call her?
A few hours later, and a few more levels decimated on his game, Rachel’s voice floated up the stairs.
‘Puck? Lunch?’
He was a young male and a smoking hot female promising food was an offer he could not refuse, so he padded down the stairs and into the kitchen. Rachel was holding a plate of sandwiches aloft and with a sweet smile, cocked her head.
‘Coming?’
He followed her obediently into the dining room, where Sarah was already seated, jiggling in her chair excitedly. Sitting beside her was a sandy-haired, freckle faced boy who was grinning widely.
‘Did you make a Nutella one? Did you make me a Nutella one?’ Sarah cried.
‘I sure did sweet thing,’ Rachel replied, doling out a sandwich to the younger girl, ‘And I’ve got a cheese sandwich for Mr Mike.’
‘Who the hell is this?’ Puck questioned, bewildered, eyeing the boy.
‘This is Mike,’ Rachel introduced gently, ‘He lives in your street. He’s in Sarah’s class.’
‘Oh...’ he grunted, ‘What’s he doing here?’
Rachel narrowed her eyes at Puck, ‘He’s come over for lunch. Is that okay with you Noah?’
He shrugged, flopping down into the seat opposite his sister, ‘...whatever.’
As Rachel handed him a plate of sandwiches, he observed his sister carefully. Something was...different.
‘You’re hair...’ he grunted finally, ‘You did something to your...’
His baby sister’s hair had been tamed from it’s matted tangly mess that it had been in all summer. It was curled neatly around her face and pulled back in a half-ponytail.
A pink blush coloured her grubby cheeks and her eyes widened in embarrassment as she chanced a look at Mike beside her.
‘Doesn’t it look great?’ Rachel interrupted, hopping to Sarah’s aid, ‘She looks beautiful.’
‘I think so,’ Mike piped up squeakily.
Puck glared at the kid, but instead turned to the girl sitting beside him.
‘Berry? You girled my sister?’
‘She asked me to,’ Rachel shrugged, ‘Now eat your sandwich.’
He rolled his eyes, ‘Yes mom.’
Rachel settled into the seat beside him and began to nibble daintily at her sandwich. The children across from them giggled and whispered quietly. Puck didn’t like this at all...
Suddenly, with a clatter and the scrap of crockery against the table, Mike and Sarah were standing by the table.
‘Thanks for lunch Rachel,’ Mike said, grinning, ‘It was great.’
‘Anytime. Are you two going to go to Mike’s house now?’
Sarah nodded brightly, her curls bopping in time, ‘Yeah, is that okay No?’
Puck’s head jerked up at his sister calling her fond nickname, ‘Uh... sure. Just be... home in time for dinner okay?’
Sarah beamed, bouncing a little on the spot, ‘Great! See you guys later!’
With that, Sarah grabbed Mike’s hand and the two of them bounded from the room. Puck’s spine stiffened and he jolted out of his chair.
‘He was... he was... holding. My. Little...’ he wheezed, staggering to the door behind them.
‘What... he...’
Rachel’s laugh was soft and gentle and she came up behind him, laying a hand on his arm, ‘Calm down big bro.’
‘He was holding my little sister’s hand!’ he bellowed, ‘There’s no calming down!’
She laughed again and shook her head, ‘Relax Noah. He’s a nice boy and Sarah really likes him. And they’re only eleven. What could they possibly do?’
‘I know what I was doing at eleven!’ Puck cried, ‘I’ve... I’ve gotta go get her!’
He charged out of the house and down the garden path, tailed closely by Rachel who was crying out, ‘Noah, don’t, leave them alone!’
As he reached the sidewalk he stopped dead. Sarah was sitting on the kerb of the house opposite them, beside Mike. She was smiling and for a moment he realized just how much she looked like their mom in those old photos he used to see.
‘God, she’s... she’s not a little kid anymore,’ he murmured.
Rachel stood beside him, surveying the scene, ‘No, I guess she isn’t...’
‘When did that happen? She was always my baby sister...’
‘She still is. You just don’t need to protect her from the same things anymore.’
Rachel’s hand slipped into his, their fingers lacing tightly and he found himself leaning against her for support.
‘We’re old...’
Rachel let out a tinkling laugh and she shook her head, ‘Don’t get a head of yourself old man. We’re still high school seniors.’
She tugged on his arm gently, ‘Come on, let’s go back in and finish our lunch. And then maybe you could finally teach me how to play that heinous game of yours...’
It was that day, in that very moment that he realized that he actually loved her. Watching her in his kitchen, making sandwiches, hanging out with his baby sister, it all made perfect sense. He didn’t just appreciate her company or tolerate her presence; he loved her because she fitted him perfectly.
The fourth time they stood in an airport. It was early morning, far, far too early for any sane human to be awake but still, they stood there together. His arms were slung around her waist, his fingers hooked in the loopholes of her low slung jeans. She was wearing his sweatshirt and a brave expression.
They’d waited (and dreaded) this moment all summer long. It was the moment when everything ceased to be, when everything changed and became something that was out of his hands. It was the moment that Friday nights on his couch and Sunday mornings at the diner would end, the moment where the normal was redefined. It was the end.
They’d talked about it for a long time, between kisses and touches, talked about how it would feel once September came, but he never imagined it would feel like this. Back in May when they first heard the news it was so easy to make the decision, so easy to decide to end it to make their lives easier. Everyone told them it was a good idea: they’d get a few months together to enjoy and prepare but everyone knew you didn’t take your high school boyfriend to college.
So with that knowledge they spent may until the last sun drenched days of August worshipping one another, laughing and falling a little more in love, with the impending expiry date of their relationship looming ominously.
And now it was here. D-Day.
‘Now boarding flight RT7835 to New York...’ a cool voice announced over the bustle of the airport.
Puck watched as Rachel’s front quivered and her lips turned down. She was trying so hard to be brave, to act nonchalant, but she simply couldn’t.
‘You’re going to have to go soon,’ he murmured, pulling her tight to him.
‘I don’t want to go.’
He pulled away from her, shaking his head, ‘Berry... please. Yes, you do. This is your dream and you want to go. If you don’t you’ll regret it.’
‘I know Noah, but I don’t want to leave.’
‘I know that, but you’ll do fine.’
‘What do I do without you?’
Puck shrugged, ‘Be happy. Find a functional boyfriend that isn’t a total whack job?’
She bit her lip, her arms tightening around his waist, ‘But I like the one I have now...’
He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, ‘Trust me Berry, a few months with all the cool kids at your new school and you’ll barely even remember my name...’
She choked back a sob, shaking her head vehemently, ‘But I don’t want to forget you!’
She began to cry softly, her frame shaking beneath his hands and he pulled her into a tight hug once more.
‘Hey, ssh, it’s okay, we’ll be friends okay? We’ve got Facebook and all that crap. It’s going to be fine.’
‘But I’m going to miss you Noah...’
‘Okay Rachey, it’s time you boarded,’ one of her fathers interrupted from behind them.
Rachel looked up wide eyed and terrified at him and his heart twisted. Why did he have to let her go?
‘Berry,’ he said softly, his hands cupping her waist, ‘I love you okay?’
He stood stunned, surprised the words had slipped out. That was... unexpected.
She froze, ‘Noah?’
There was no going back now.
‘I love you. And New York? That’s where you belong and that’s where I want you to be. It would make me so happy to know that you’re happy. So...’
‘I have to go,’ she concluded softly.
‘You do.’
She looped her arms around his neck, pressing one soft, sweet, chaste kiss to his lips.
‘I love you too Noah,’ she said, her voice waveringly.
With that, she picked up her bag and slung it over her shoulder. He released her and let her walk away his heart screaming all the while.
She paused at the top of the escalators, looking over her shoulder at him, looking for validation that she was doing the right thing.
He nodded bravely, though secretly he was crumbling, ‘Go kick some Julliard ass.’
She offered him a tiny smile and a meagre wave before stepping onto the escalator and disappearing from view.
He would go home that night and cry.
The fifth time was the conclusion, the end of a series of events that had led to his crazed decision. Ever since September he had been running himself into the ground just so he didn’t have to think of her. He got her Facebook messages, the chirrupy texts that proclaimed how much fun she was having but it hurt him to think that she was okay, while without her, he didn’t know how to function. Suddenly, without Berry, there was no one to talk to, no one to confide in about the annual call from his father, no one to help him out when Sarah was going insane and screaming. He was on his own.
It got to the point where the pain became physical, an aching in his chest, it got a point where his mother told him to smile or she was kicking him out. So, he reached a decision.
As he sprinted through the airport, he realized that this was the dumbest idea. Ever. Even for him.
He had only the clothes on his back and his wallet, which in hindsight was idiotic (but while he was standing in line at the supermarket had seemed like a great one).
His heart was racing as he hailed a cab amongst the roar of New York City and slid into the first available vehicle. He’d never been to New York before, what the hell was he doing?
He managed to garble out instructions that his driver appeared to understand and suddenly found himself pulling in front of a theatre. In a matter of minutes he had tickets and despite the usher’s disdainful glance at his clothes, a seat. His heart racketed against his rib cage and he gripped the arm rests in anticipation as the lights dimmed.
And suddenly, there she was, after nine whole months without her. She was standing centre stage, where she belonged.
Instantly, a sense of calm washed over him and he settled back into his seat. Even that was enough for him.
He spent the entire show entranced, watching her dance fluidly, basking in the glory of her voice reaching heavenward, realizing just how much he loved that girl. Simply seeing her made him feel whole.
The show seemed to fly and suddenly it was drawing to a close. She drew a deep breath, tipping her head back to belt out the final spine-tingling note of the show. Her face glowed in the lights, her hair sparkling and features relaxed into a blissful smile. She was never more beautiful than when she was performing, in her element, finally comfortable in her own skin.
The curtain dropped and the audience burst into applause. He leapt up from his seat, skittering up to the backstage door.
A burly security guard stopped him, shaking his head, ‘No way man. No backstage entrance unless you’re a student at Julliard.’
‘Well I uh... am,’ Puck lied.
‘Do you have ID?’
‘...no.’
The guy pursed his lips, ‘Then no entrance for you.’
‘What if I told you my girlfriend was the lead and I haven’t seen her in nine months. Would you let me back then?’
‘Did you enrol yourself in Julliard in the last two minutes?’
‘Uh… no?’
‘There’s your answer.’
Frustrated, Puck balled his fists together, anger rising in his chest. He wanted to see her.
‘He’s with me,’ a voice announced.
Puck frowned surveying the woman whom the voice belonged to. She was blonde, tall and wiry with purple framed glass. She was eyeing him with a slight frown.
‘You know this dude?’
She nodded, ‘I do Pete, let him through.’
The security guard shrugged, stepping aside, ‘My bad, man...’
Bewildered, Puck walked toward the woman, who wrapped her thin fingers around his elbow and dragged him down the corridor.
‘Uh thanks for bailing me out...’
‘You better not be lying kid,’ she said sharply, ‘You do belong to Rachel Berry right?’
He frowned indigantly, ‘I wouldn’t say belonged...’ he began.
She shot him a disapproving look and he quickly retracted, ‘Totally. Wholly and solely property of Rachel Berry.’
‘Good. Because her moping is depressing. And you might make her stop. You have to make her stop. Understand?’
He nodded silently, mostly because he was terrified of her and with that, she rapped on the door they were standing outside.
‘Berry, I’ve got a delivery for you!’ she hollered.
With that, the woman turned on her heel and walked away from him, leaving him standing alone.
Suddenly the fear returned and his heart pounded nervously. What if she didn’t want to see him? What if she had a boyfriend now?
Slowly the door open, ‘I’m sorry, I’m sure you’ve got the wrong...’ her voice murmured softly.
She was standing there in the doorway of her dressing room, clad in loose jeans that he swore belonged to him, tied at the waist with a scarf, with a sad, weary expression on her face.
And then her eyes landed on him.
‘N-Noah?’ she stumbled, ‘What are you doing here?’
He was struck with sudden shyness, bashfulness that he’d shown up so presumptuous.
‘Hey Berry...’ he greeted, shoving his hands in his pockets, ‘Sorry to uh... drop in like this...’
‘Were you here for the show?’ she interrupted.
He nodded slowly, ‘Yeah...’
‘Oh my god...’
With that, she launched herself into his arms, wrapping her arms around his neck. Surprised and taken aback by her outburst he froze momentarily.
‘Oh, Noah, I’m so glad you’re here!’ she cried, her voice taking on a weepy edge, ‘I can’t believe you’re here!’
She pulled away, looking up at him, ‘Are... did I do something wrong Noah?’
Jolted out of his reverie, he shook his head, back stepping hurriedly, ‘No! No, god, of course not Berry. I just, I can’t believe you’re standing here in front of me. I’ve missed you like hell and it’s kind of weird to finally see you and see that nothing’s really changed...’
‘You’ve missed me?’ she asked hopefully.
‘Oh god Berry, like you couldn’t imagine!’
Her hands reached up to cup his face, her eyes glistening brightly, ‘That... Noah, that means the world to me.’
With that, their lips met, softly at first, deepening as it continued. Her body melted against his and he realized just the enormity of how much he had missed her. Her lips were soft, familiar and he hated how corny it sounded when he thought that it kind of felt like home. Her tongue was sliding behind his teeth, and he was grasping handfuls of his hair.
‘Oh god, please... get a room,’ a snarky voice interrupted.
They broke away, gasping for air and Rachel dissolved into giggles against his chest.
‘Oh how embarrassing,’
He clasped his arms around her, holding her tightly to him. He had no idea how this was going to work out, but the last nine months had proved one thing: living without her simply wasn’t an option. Tomorrow was a terrifying prospect, because tomorrow they would need to talk and make plans to make this work, because tomorrow held a future beyond that day which would glow with the promise of a ring because he was dating Rachel Berry and she would expect no less and possibly, in the most terrifying prospect it would hold a bunch of chatty Jewish babies, but he realized that right now, all he needed was today. He’d deal with tomorrow, tomorrow because right here, in the present, everything was great.
Genre: Romance
Rating: T
Summary: There were only five times in the span of their relationship that Puck ever saw Rachel in jeans...
Rachel Berry was a skirt kind of girl. And as it turned out, over time, Puck became a skirt kind of guy. Skirts just seemed to be the staple of Rachel Berry, one of her many signatures, her way of telling everybody exactly who she was.
For as long as he could remember, Rachel Berry had worn a skirt. On their first date, with a thigh scraping, eye boggingly daring plaid skirt, on the road to regionals with a red, school pride themed bubble skirt. There had been a skirt to honour every occasion in her life. But, every once in a while, she changed.
Puck could only recall five occasions in their entire relationship in which she had worn jeans and they were moments that were distinct and precious.
The first time had been something rare, something that, when he thought back on it later on his life brought him shivers. The day his daughter was born.
Quinn went into labour around 7pm on Saturday 15th April. They’d all been on Spring Break, minding their own business and he had been in the middle of a vicious game of Assassins Creed II when he got the call. Quinn’s voice was frail and shaky over the phone as she gasped out simply, ‘She’s coming...’
Instantly, Puck had swept himself out of the house, forgetting a jacket, forgetting socks, forgetting to tell his mother where he was going. His heart was thudding and he was freaking out. He sped to the hospital to find Quinn lying in a bed, gasping and crying and Finn standing stoically in the corner of the room.
The room had been silent and it stayed that way, Finn and Puck glancing at each other as they passed. They took turns holding Quinn’s hand as each contraction passed and they waited patiently for the daughter that neither of them knew they would love.
The nurse kicked them out at midnight to check on Quinn and the two boys stood in the hall, silence descending on them uncomfortably. Finn fiddled with his phone, shooting a mass text off to the rest of the Glee club. Q’s having her baby tonight.
He still couldn’t quite wrap his mind around it. His flesh and DNA, his blood was being born. Tonight. He was going to have a daughter. That couldn’t be real.
He was only sixteen.
The nurse called them back in and told them that Quinn would need all the support she could get as she went into the final stages of labour. For once, for the first time since their falling out, Puck and Finn worked together, holding her hands, urging her to breath as she screamed and grunted.
At 1:47am on Sunday the 16th of April, Baby Drizze Fabray was born into the world, kicking and screaming. For a moment they all stood breathless, watching the red writhing mass, the enormity rendering them breathless.
Puck couldn’t explain the way his heart twisted as he looked at the baby, the silence and comfort he felt at the innate knowledge that she was his.
But as soon as the baby was his, she ceased to be. They lay her down on an exhausted Quinn’s chest and Quinn began to cry as Finn pushed her sweaty hair off her forehead. Quinn murmured something to the nurse and like that, the baby was stolen from his sight. He knew then and there, that he’d never see that baby again, that she was no longer his. He’d gone from everything to nothing in a matter of a few moments. Where did he turn?
Suddenly, overcome with a rare display of emotion, Puck sprinted from the room, gasping for air. What had just happened?
He stumbled out into the waiting room, tearing off his paper gown, clawing at the scrub cap on his head as his mind swum with panicked, scared thoughts.
And then he found her.
Rachel was alone, sitting in the waiting room, her tiny frame curled up in a plastic chair, wearing a baggy sweatshirt and jeans that she’d evidently grabbed from the top of her drawer. Her dark eyes probed him gently and she bit her lip, ducking her head.
‘Noah...’
For a fleeting moment he considered turning around and running in the opposite direction but he suddenly found he didn’t have the strength to. He doubled over, gasping for air desperately.
Rachel stood up, her face brave and open as she approached him. He waited for a Berry speech, for a long winded congratulations but instead...
She held open her arms.
‘Noah,’ she murmured softly, ‘It’ll be okay...’
And he crumpled.
He fell into her arms, the alarmed voice in the back of his head screaming his embarrassment, but he couldn’t hold it. He was defeated, done fighting, done trying. He just wanted to scream...
Rachel was only tiny and she struggled to wrap her arms around him fully, but held tight as his entire frame wracked with sobs.
‘Sshh...’ she murmured softly, her small hands running up and down his back, ‘It’ll be okay. It’ll be okay,’ she promised.
As he cried, she simply held him, content to be a shoulder for him if he needed.
Finally, when the cries slowed, Rachel looked up at him through her large, shimmery eyes. Gently she led him into the plastic seat beside her.
‘Noah, do you want to talk about it?’
‘Why are you here?’ he asked abrasively.
She shrugged, pushing her hands into the pockets of her jeans, ‘I got Finn’s text at midnight. I thought that perhaps, in all the hustle and bustle, you’d like someone to lean on.’
Even his distraught and hazed mind, that thought registered in the back of his mind. She wasn’t here for Finn.
‘Me?’
She nodded, biting her lip, ‘Yes, I thought that everyone would be fussing over Quinn and Finn would be valiant and make decisions and be helpful and that... that maybe when you left the hospital, you’d want someone to talk to.’
‘You’ve been waiting here for nearly two hours for me?’
She nodded again, her eyes full of earnest emotion, ‘I thought you might need it Noah.’
‘What should I do Berry?’
She shook her head sadly, her head coming to rest on his shoulder, ‘I don’t know Noah. I think that you need to go back to Quinn, if you think you’re strong enough. I think you need to be with her right now, because what you’re feeling, she feels twice as sad and twice as angry. That was her baby. Her first baby and she just had to make the hardest decision a mother could ever make. You need to stay by her side and let her know that you support her.’
‘But I...’
‘It wasn’t your decision to make Noah. I know it hurts and I’m sad for you, but it was Quinn who would always live with her decision. Now, you need to support her.’
Puck nodded grimly, pushing himself to his feet, ‘Okay. I’m going to. If you say that’s what she needs...’
He ambled toward the door, suddenly turning around to look at Rachel.
‘Hey, Berry... are you going to be around when I come back?’
She shrugged, ‘I can if you want me to be Noah.’
‘I’d like that... I’d like someone to talk to I think.’
Rachel nodded, smiling softly, ‘Okay. I’ll talk to you later. I’ll wait here for you.’
And she did. When he came out an hour later, Quinn’s tears still fresh in his mind, she was still there, curled up in her chair ready for him. Gently, as her eyes locked with his, she stood up and her fingers laced with his. That night she was his saving grace, his one reason to live, the only thing that made him feel alive when it felt like his whole world had been snatched away from him. It was the moment he realized the Rachel Berry was there for him, no matter what.
The second time didn’t occur until a year later. It had been a whirlwind year as they began a period that he referred to as ‘After Drizzle’ even though Rachel kindly pointed out that the initials A.D were already occupied and had been for a very long period of time. In the time of A.D things resumed as they had always been; Quinn bounced back, peppy and fiery, ready to reclaim her spot as Head Cheerleader as she vehemently denied knowledge of the baby that no one was allowed to talk about. Glee went into its usual exuberant rehearsals, ready to win Nationals this year after an embarrassing defeat and he went back to being Puck. Between Drizzle and the January of his junior year he had coaxed Santana into bed (or rather into truck he supposed) along with a slew of sexy messages from girls he barely knew. Things were the same.
Almost.
There were two changes that he noted between the periods before and after Drizzle and they both had to do with one Rachel Berry. For one, she had become a constant in his life. Whether he liked it or not (it was usually a not) she was always around. There was something about the way she always knew when she had to be there, the moments when he was and wasn’t going to talk, the moments that he’d never admit to, but the moments that he would need someone to hold him. And somehow, she was always there.
So, she had become a perpetual presence. She was there, walking home in the rain with him, she was there at the mall, chattering his ear off, and she was there at the pizza parlour every Tuesday night without fail.
But then, there was another change.
Heartbroken and destroyed from Quinn’s betrayal, Puck hadn’t been the only one to turn to Berry. Finn, suddenly deciding that it was high time he had a girlfriend again, hastened to Rachel’s side, professing how wrong he’d been for ignoring the one girl who always got him. Rachel melted into his arms and the two of them bounced around the campus, glowing and smiling at one another in a way that made Puck’s stomach turn.
So, it was a surprise when he walked into school on a Monday morning to find something new.
As he walked through the halls, he nodded at his football buddies, leered at the geeks with the high waisted shorts and growled and glared at the lame hockey dudes. He winked at a passing group of freshman and wolf-whistled at Santana and her band of merry sluts. All in all, a typical morning. Until...
He turned a corner and strutted down the hall, whistling gleefully on his way to his locker. He was making a point of showing up for school today: it was pizza day at the cafeteria and he wasn’t one to pass up a good lunch. As she turned to reach his locker, he stopped dead in his tracks. Something was different. Standing before him was Rachel Berry, hunched over, her face veiled by her locker.
The reason he stopped was the reason he knew something was dreadfully wrong. His usually impeccable and well (if not outlandishly) dressed girl was standing in front of her locker wearing jeans.
Something was definitely wrong, because he knew how much Berry’s skirts meant to her, how much of her confidence relied on the ability to rock those minis. And today she was wearing jeans.
‘Berry?’ he asked, slamming his locker shut and ambling toward her, ‘What’s uh... what’s up?’
Rachel’s jolted at the sound of his voice and slowly she revealed her face from behind her locker door.
As soon as she locked eyes with him, her lip quivered, ‘Uh... Noah...’ she began evenly, her voice controlled and smooth, ‘Good morning. It is a... uh...’
‘Berry? What’s up?’ Puck repeated, taking a few more steps toward him, ‘Come on... you can tell me...’
Rachel bit down firmly on lip and shook her head, ‘Uh, no. No, I don’t think I can. I’m going to go to class now...’
Finally, Puck shortened the gap between them, laying one hand on her arm. Rachel stared at him for a long moment, before front finally wavered.
Her lips began to quiver and her the corners of her mouth fell, her shoulders hunching around herself protectively and her eyes glistened. She shook her head, pressing her lips together firmly.
‘He broke up with me,’ she cried softly, the first tear slipping down her cheek, ‘He... he told me that we couldn’t see each other anymore and that... Quinn...’
Her voice broke on the other girls name and her body began to shake with sobs.
‘Woah!’ he cried, ‘Um... okay... well... uh...’
He didn’t do crying girls. He made the girls cry, he didn’t help them do it... There really ought to be a manual for this situation. So he did the only thing he could, the one thing she’d done for him a year before, the one thing that had helped to heal his breaking heart.
He wrapped his arms around her tiny shoulders, crushing her to his chest. He smoothed her hair tenderly, hoping that he could impart just a little comfort upon her.
As her cries slowed Puck slowly released her, so she was standing at arms length, both of his hands planted firmly on her shoulders.
‘Hey,’ he said softly, reaching out with the pad of his thumb to swipe away one single liquid diamond resting on her cheek, ‘Listen to me. No dude, Finn or not, is worth your tears okay?’
Rachel looked up him, watery and sniffly with doleful eyes but nodded nevertheless.
‘So uh... no more crying okay? Because, he doesn’t deserve it...’
She nodded again slowly, her breathing evening out gently. She shook her head, an embarrassed flush rising up her cheeks.
‘I’m sorry Noah, I didn’t mean to... catch you off guard. I didn’t want you to see my like that.’
‘No biggie,’ he shrugged, ‘I already think you’re crazy, it was just icing on the cake. Plus, you’re still hot, so I don’t care.’
Rachel smiled weakly, shaking her head disbelievingly, ‘I ought to be offended by that…’
‘Yeah, you probably should. I’m a bad dude.’
Rachel’s face fell a little, ‘Not as bad as him. You’d never be as bad to him. Not to me.... what do I do about him Noah?’
She looked up at him hopefully and for a second his heart broke a little. So, he reached out his arm, ruffling her already mussed curls teasingly.
‘You sex it up on Friday night at the mall and get back in the game. Don’t let him know that he got to you...’
‘But I’m so embarrassed...’
‘Rachel!’
They both turned at the sound of Finn’s voice coming from the other end of the corridor. Rachel’s eyes filled with panic and she tensed beneath his hands.
Puck nodded sadly, ‘Come on Berry, lets get out of here.’
Rachel looked around, bewildered, ‘But... Noah, school hasn’t even started yet.’
‘School’s overrated. Let’s get some pizza and then watch some crap movie okay? You’ll be better off with me than at school today. I promise...’
He held out a hand, meeting her eyes gently. He smiled and cocked his head, ‘You coming Berry?’
She took a deep breath, glancing briefly back at Finn who was waiting expectantly for her to come to him. Her jaw set and she straightened her shoulders, her hand slipping into his. She smiled and squeezed his hands.
‘Yeah, I’m coming.’
The third time marked a sweeter occasion, a time when nobody needed to cry. Now fast approaching their senior year, Puck spent his summer with Rachel. For once it didn’t surprise him because he’d finally realized how much he liked her company and that, once he got over the chattiness, she could easily be the best friend anyone could ever desire.
So, they spent their finally high school summer together harassing the town. They laid out in the sun at the public pool, they met up with Santana and Brittany for an ongoing, three month waging Super Soaker war, and travelled hours for lame theme parks. They spent their hours in between holding hands and talking about everything (it wasn’t hard with the world’s greatest conversationalist in the pair). The record still declared them as friends, but only because he was too pansy-assed to ask the girl to be his girlfriend, but they did almost everything a normal couple would.
The summer was drawing somewhat to a close, with only two meagre sun soaked weeks before they returned to school as seniors. He had full intentions of sitting in front of his TV with his Xbox for the whole day because in a few weeks time he’d have to schedule other things in around Xbox. His plans were going well and his day seemed promising until he heard something rapping at his front door.
With a groan, Puck got up, brushing the tortilla chip crumbs off his pyjama pants and padded down the stairs. Scowl in place he flung open the door, ready to hurl abuse at whoever the moron was that interrupted his brilliant plans.
But it was Berry.
She was standing there on his doorstep, bright eyed and smiley, her copious curls scooped into a bouncy ponytail and a pair of denim capris hugging her hips sexily. Who the hell was he to say no?
‘Berry...’ he greeted slowly, his eyes sliding up her body, taking a moment to appreciate the way her tank top clung to the curve of her breasts.
Rachel shook her head, tutting with a roll of her eyes, ‘I’m not here for you, in fact I’m insulted that you would insinuate such a thing.’
‘You’re at my house... but you’re not here for me?’ Puck asked disbelievingly, scoffing.
Rachel nodded primly, playful defiance flashing in her eyes, ‘I’m here on secret women’s business...’
Puck frowned, ‘Secret Women’s...’
Suddenly it dawned on him and he turned, hollering over his shoulder, ‘SARAH!’
His little sister scurried out from whatever hole she had been hiding in and appeared by Puck’s side, a squeal rising in her throat as she saw Berry.
‘Rachel!’ she shrieked, launching herself at the older girl, ‘You came!’
‘Of course I did. A woman can’t ignore another woman’s plea for help,’ Rachel informed her, wrapping her arms around his little sister.
‘Sarah called you?’ he demanded.
Rachel nodded, a small smile playing on her lips, ‘She needed some advice, woman to woman...’
‘You’re here to see my sister?’ he continued, still dumbfounded.
‘Yes, now, Puck, you can go back to your Xbox game...’
He frowned as Sarah led Rachel by the hand into their living room, ‘Are you sure? I mean, like I could come in here and chill with you girls or whatever...’
Rachel laughed, shaking her head, ‘No. I’ve got it. Have fun, I’ll keep Sarah company for a while.’
‘Uh... okay...’ he said slowly.
With that, the two girls disappeared into the living room amidst rising giggles. As he sat in his bedroom, he found his mind wandering from the game. Berry was down there, chattering to his sister, their laughter and shrieks of delight rising through the floorboards. What were they doing? Why did Sarah call her?
A few hours later, and a few more levels decimated on his game, Rachel’s voice floated up the stairs.
‘Puck? Lunch?’
He was a young male and a smoking hot female promising food was an offer he could not refuse, so he padded down the stairs and into the kitchen. Rachel was holding a plate of sandwiches aloft and with a sweet smile, cocked her head.
‘Coming?’
He followed her obediently into the dining room, where Sarah was already seated, jiggling in her chair excitedly. Sitting beside her was a sandy-haired, freckle faced boy who was grinning widely.
‘Did you make a Nutella one? Did you make me a Nutella one?’ Sarah cried.
‘I sure did sweet thing,’ Rachel replied, doling out a sandwich to the younger girl, ‘And I’ve got a cheese sandwich for Mr Mike.’
‘Who the hell is this?’ Puck questioned, bewildered, eyeing the boy.
‘This is Mike,’ Rachel introduced gently, ‘He lives in your street. He’s in Sarah’s class.’
‘Oh...’ he grunted, ‘What’s he doing here?’
Rachel narrowed her eyes at Puck, ‘He’s come over for lunch. Is that okay with you Noah?’
He shrugged, flopping down into the seat opposite his sister, ‘...whatever.’
As Rachel handed him a plate of sandwiches, he observed his sister carefully. Something was...different.
‘You’re hair...’ he grunted finally, ‘You did something to your...’
His baby sister’s hair had been tamed from it’s matted tangly mess that it had been in all summer. It was curled neatly around her face and pulled back in a half-ponytail.
A pink blush coloured her grubby cheeks and her eyes widened in embarrassment as she chanced a look at Mike beside her.
‘Doesn’t it look great?’ Rachel interrupted, hopping to Sarah’s aid, ‘She looks beautiful.’
‘I think so,’ Mike piped up squeakily.
Puck glared at the kid, but instead turned to the girl sitting beside him.
‘Berry? You girled my sister?’
‘She asked me to,’ Rachel shrugged, ‘Now eat your sandwich.’
He rolled his eyes, ‘Yes mom.’
Rachel settled into the seat beside him and began to nibble daintily at her sandwich. The children across from them giggled and whispered quietly. Puck didn’t like this at all...
Suddenly, with a clatter and the scrap of crockery against the table, Mike and Sarah were standing by the table.
‘Thanks for lunch Rachel,’ Mike said, grinning, ‘It was great.’
‘Anytime. Are you two going to go to Mike’s house now?’
Sarah nodded brightly, her curls bopping in time, ‘Yeah, is that okay No?’
Puck’s head jerked up at his sister calling her fond nickname, ‘Uh... sure. Just be... home in time for dinner okay?’
Sarah beamed, bouncing a little on the spot, ‘Great! See you guys later!’
With that, Sarah grabbed Mike’s hand and the two of them bounded from the room. Puck’s spine stiffened and he jolted out of his chair.
‘He was... he was... holding. My. Little...’ he wheezed, staggering to the door behind them.
‘What... he...’
Rachel’s laugh was soft and gentle and she came up behind him, laying a hand on his arm, ‘Calm down big bro.’
‘He was holding my little sister’s hand!’ he bellowed, ‘There’s no calming down!’
She laughed again and shook her head, ‘Relax Noah. He’s a nice boy and Sarah really likes him. And they’re only eleven. What could they possibly do?’
‘I know what I was doing at eleven!’ Puck cried, ‘I’ve... I’ve gotta go get her!’
He charged out of the house and down the garden path, tailed closely by Rachel who was crying out, ‘Noah, don’t, leave them alone!’
As he reached the sidewalk he stopped dead. Sarah was sitting on the kerb of the house opposite them, beside Mike. She was smiling and for a moment he realized just how much she looked like their mom in those old photos he used to see.
‘God, she’s... she’s not a little kid anymore,’ he murmured.
Rachel stood beside him, surveying the scene, ‘No, I guess she isn’t...’
‘When did that happen? She was always my baby sister...’
‘She still is. You just don’t need to protect her from the same things anymore.’
Rachel’s hand slipped into his, their fingers lacing tightly and he found himself leaning against her for support.
‘We’re old...’
Rachel let out a tinkling laugh and she shook her head, ‘Don’t get a head of yourself old man. We’re still high school seniors.’
She tugged on his arm gently, ‘Come on, let’s go back in and finish our lunch. And then maybe you could finally teach me how to play that heinous game of yours...’
It was that day, in that very moment that he realized that he actually loved her. Watching her in his kitchen, making sandwiches, hanging out with his baby sister, it all made perfect sense. He didn’t just appreciate her company or tolerate her presence; he loved her because she fitted him perfectly.
The fourth time they stood in an airport. It was early morning, far, far too early for any sane human to be awake but still, they stood there together. His arms were slung around her waist, his fingers hooked in the loopholes of her low slung jeans. She was wearing his sweatshirt and a brave expression.
They’d waited (and dreaded) this moment all summer long. It was the moment when everything ceased to be, when everything changed and became something that was out of his hands. It was the moment that Friday nights on his couch and Sunday mornings at the diner would end, the moment where the normal was redefined. It was the end.
They’d talked about it for a long time, between kisses and touches, talked about how it would feel once September came, but he never imagined it would feel like this. Back in May when they first heard the news it was so easy to make the decision, so easy to decide to end it to make their lives easier. Everyone told them it was a good idea: they’d get a few months together to enjoy and prepare but everyone knew you didn’t take your high school boyfriend to college.
So with that knowledge they spent may until the last sun drenched days of August worshipping one another, laughing and falling a little more in love, with the impending expiry date of their relationship looming ominously.
And now it was here. D-Day.
‘Now boarding flight RT7835 to New York...’ a cool voice announced over the bustle of the airport.
Puck watched as Rachel’s front quivered and her lips turned down. She was trying so hard to be brave, to act nonchalant, but she simply couldn’t.
‘You’re going to have to go soon,’ he murmured, pulling her tight to him.
‘I don’t want to go.’
He pulled away from her, shaking his head, ‘Berry... please. Yes, you do. This is your dream and you want to go. If you don’t you’ll regret it.’
‘I know Noah, but I don’t want to leave.’
‘I know that, but you’ll do fine.’
‘What do I do without you?’
Puck shrugged, ‘Be happy. Find a functional boyfriend that isn’t a total whack job?’
She bit her lip, her arms tightening around his waist, ‘But I like the one I have now...’
He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, ‘Trust me Berry, a few months with all the cool kids at your new school and you’ll barely even remember my name...’
She choked back a sob, shaking her head vehemently, ‘But I don’t want to forget you!’
She began to cry softly, her frame shaking beneath his hands and he pulled her into a tight hug once more.
‘Hey, ssh, it’s okay, we’ll be friends okay? We’ve got Facebook and all that crap. It’s going to be fine.’
‘But I’m going to miss you Noah...’
‘Okay Rachey, it’s time you boarded,’ one of her fathers interrupted from behind them.
Rachel looked up wide eyed and terrified at him and his heart twisted. Why did he have to let her go?
‘Berry,’ he said softly, his hands cupping her waist, ‘I love you okay?’
He stood stunned, surprised the words had slipped out. That was... unexpected.
She froze, ‘Noah?’
There was no going back now.
‘I love you. And New York? That’s where you belong and that’s where I want you to be. It would make me so happy to know that you’re happy. So...’
‘I have to go,’ she concluded softly.
‘You do.’
She looped her arms around his neck, pressing one soft, sweet, chaste kiss to his lips.
‘I love you too Noah,’ she said, her voice waveringly.
With that, she picked up her bag and slung it over her shoulder. He released her and let her walk away his heart screaming all the while.
She paused at the top of the escalators, looking over her shoulder at him, looking for validation that she was doing the right thing.
He nodded bravely, though secretly he was crumbling, ‘Go kick some Julliard ass.’
She offered him a tiny smile and a meagre wave before stepping onto the escalator and disappearing from view.
He would go home that night and cry.
The fifth time was the conclusion, the end of a series of events that had led to his crazed decision. Ever since September he had been running himself into the ground just so he didn’t have to think of her. He got her Facebook messages, the chirrupy texts that proclaimed how much fun she was having but it hurt him to think that she was okay, while without her, he didn’t know how to function. Suddenly, without Berry, there was no one to talk to, no one to confide in about the annual call from his father, no one to help him out when Sarah was going insane and screaming. He was on his own.
It got to the point where the pain became physical, an aching in his chest, it got a point where his mother told him to smile or she was kicking him out. So, he reached a decision.
As he sprinted through the airport, he realized that this was the dumbest idea. Ever. Even for him.
He had only the clothes on his back and his wallet, which in hindsight was idiotic (but while he was standing in line at the supermarket had seemed like a great one).
His heart was racing as he hailed a cab amongst the roar of New York City and slid into the first available vehicle. He’d never been to New York before, what the hell was he doing?
He managed to garble out instructions that his driver appeared to understand and suddenly found himself pulling in front of a theatre. In a matter of minutes he had tickets and despite the usher’s disdainful glance at his clothes, a seat. His heart racketed against his rib cage and he gripped the arm rests in anticipation as the lights dimmed.
And suddenly, there she was, after nine whole months without her. She was standing centre stage, where she belonged.
Instantly, a sense of calm washed over him and he settled back into his seat. Even that was enough for him.
He spent the entire show entranced, watching her dance fluidly, basking in the glory of her voice reaching heavenward, realizing just how much he loved that girl. Simply seeing her made him feel whole.
The show seemed to fly and suddenly it was drawing to a close. She drew a deep breath, tipping her head back to belt out the final spine-tingling note of the show. Her face glowed in the lights, her hair sparkling and features relaxed into a blissful smile. She was never more beautiful than when she was performing, in her element, finally comfortable in her own skin.
The curtain dropped and the audience burst into applause. He leapt up from his seat, skittering up to the backstage door.
A burly security guard stopped him, shaking his head, ‘No way man. No backstage entrance unless you’re a student at Julliard.’
‘Well I uh... am,’ Puck lied.
‘Do you have ID?’
‘...no.’
The guy pursed his lips, ‘Then no entrance for you.’
‘What if I told you my girlfriend was the lead and I haven’t seen her in nine months. Would you let me back then?’
‘Did you enrol yourself in Julliard in the last two minutes?’
‘Uh… no?’
‘There’s your answer.’
Frustrated, Puck balled his fists together, anger rising in his chest. He wanted to see her.
‘He’s with me,’ a voice announced.
Puck frowned surveying the woman whom the voice belonged to. She was blonde, tall and wiry with purple framed glass. She was eyeing him with a slight frown.
‘You know this dude?’
She nodded, ‘I do Pete, let him through.’
The security guard shrugged, stepping aside, ‘My bad, man...’
Bewildered, Puck walked toward the woman, who wrapped her thin fingers around his elbow and dragged him down the corridor.
‘Uh thanks for bailing me out...’
‘You better not be lying kid,’ she said sharply, ‘You do belong to Rachel Berry right?’
He frowned indigantly, ‘I wouldn’t say belonged...’ he began.
She shot him a disapproving look and he quickly retracted, ‘Totally. Wholly and solely property of Rachel Berry.’
‘Good. Because her moping is depressing. And you might make her stop. You have to make her stop. Understand?’
He nodded silently, mostly because he was terrified of her and with that, she rapped on the door they were standing outside.
‘Berry, I’ve got a delivery for you!’ she hollered.
With that, the woman turned on her heel and walked away from him, leaving him standing alone.
Suddenly the fear returned and his heart pounded nervously. What if she didn’t want to see him? What if she had a boyfriend now?
Slowly the door open, ‘I’m sorry, I’m sure you’ve got the wrong...’ her voice murmured softly.
She was standing there in the doorway of her dressing room, clad in loose jeans that he swore belonged to him, tied at the waist with a scarf, with a sad, weary expression on her face.
And then her eyes landed on him.
‘N-Noah?’ she stumbled, ‘What are you doing here?’
He was struck with sudden shyness, bashfulness that he’d shown up so presumptuous.
‘Hey Berry...’ he greeted, shoving his hands in his pockets, ‘Sorry to uh... drop in like this...’
‘Were you here for the show?’ she interrupted.
He nodded slowly, ‘Yeah...’
‘Oh my god...’
With that, she launched herself into his arms, wrapping her arms around his neck. Surprised and taken aback by her outburst he froze momentarily.
‘Oh, Noah, I’m so glad you’re here!’ she cried, her voice taking on a weepy edge, ‘I can’t believe you’re here!’
She pulled away, looking up at him, ‘Are... did I do something wrong Noah?’
Jolted out of his reverie, he shook his head, back stepping hurriedly, ‘No! No, god, of course not Berry. I just, I can’t believe you’re standing here in front of me. I’ve missed you like hell and it’s kind of weird to finally see you and see that nothing’s really changed...’
‘You’ve missed me?’ she asked hopefully.
‘Oh god Berry, like you couldn’t imagine!’
Her hands reached up to cup his face, her eyes glistening brightly, ‘That... Noah, that means the world to me.’
With that, their lips met, softly at first, deepening as it continued. Her body melted against his and he realized just the enormity of how much he had missed her. Her lips were soft, familiar and he hated how corny it sounded when he thought that it kind of felt like home. Her tongue was sliding behind his teeth, and he was grasping handfuls of his hair.
‘Oh god, please... get a room,’ a snarky voice interrupted.
They broke away, gasping for air and Rachel dissolved into giggles against his chest.
‘Oh how embarrassing,’
He clasped his arms around her, holding her tightly to him. He had no idea how this was going to work out, but the last nine months had proved one thing: living without her simply wasn’t an option. Tomorrow was a terrifying prospect, because tomorrow they would need to talk and make plans to make this work, because tomorrow held a future beyond that day which would glow with the promise of a ring because he was dating Rachel Berry and she would expect no less and possibly, in the most terrifying prospect it would hold a bunch of chatty Jewish babies, but he realized that right now, all he needed was today. He’d deal with tomorrow, tomorrow because right here, in the present, everything was great.