Fic: Off the Stage (3/14)
Title: Off the Stage (3/14)
Author: gradgirl (aka Ali)
Rating: PG-13 (eventually NC-17)
Characters/Pairings: Van Hansis/Eric Sheffer Stevens
Summary: Future fic. What happens off the stage when Van and Eric meet again?
Warnings: RPS. If you are offended by the idea, please do not read this story.
Disclaimer: Complete fabrication, never happened, never expect to happen. There are no intentions to offend or cause harm.
Author’s Notes: The whole thing (credit and blame) goes to cherimola. Without her, I never would have attempted to write this. Thanks to my amazing beta, reilaroo, I cannot post without and thanks also to slayerkitty for insisting I post. Comments are appreciated and loved. Thank you ~Ali
Previous Chapters: { Chapter 1} { Chapter 2}
Chapter Three
The next couple of days the cast began with table reads in the morning and then in the afternoon, they would begin rehearsals with blocking. On the third day of play rehearsal, Eric and Van were called up to the stage. They were to do the first scene. Their characters, estranged half-brothers, haven’t seen each other in years.
When the men got on the stage, the director noticed something right away. “Where are your scripts?” he called out to them.
Eric and Van looked at each other for a moment. After working on the soap and having to memorize pages of dialogue quickly, the script for this play wasn’t that difficult. Both men had the first act memorized already. Eric hesitated for a moment, his gaze still on Van’s. The younger man offered a smile and then turned to the director. “I brought it, but I think I have this scene memorized, Neil. Eric probably does too,” he turned to the redhead for confirmation.
Eric nodded in response, and Van turned back to the director.
Neil sat dumbfounded for a moment. In the first few weeks, those pages were practically glued to everyone’s hands. But if these guys knew what they were doing, then he wasn’t about to stand in their way. “All right. Begin when you’re ready,” Neil called.
Both guys walked off stage as they had been directed in the script. Eric came rushing through the door with Van quickly at his heels. “So you’re just going to run away again?” Van called out, his voice sounded a little scratchy.
Eric stopped and shot a withering glance in Van’s direction. “Run away? I left. It wasn’t as though anyone expected me to come back.”
“I did,” Van countered, moving further into the room.
Eric held his stance, but Van’s movements were slow and deliberate; and the redhead felt like he was going to be trapped soon. It was an odd feeling to have, considering the size of the stage. “How old were you, kid? Did you still believe in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny?”
Van shook his head and a bitter laugh leapt from his lips. It wasn’t in the script and he hoped the director wasn’t too upset. “I’m not a child.”
“Then stop pouting,” Eric countered, and he started to move as well, pacing around the stage, creating a circle of distance between himself and Van.
Van’s mouth had formed a pout and he quickly offered a stiff grin. “Better? I’m 25 now, Davis, but seeing you, it does make me think of who I was, of the boy I was, who did believe in silly things like magic, and the fact that his older brother would come back to visit him.”
“Half-brother,” Eric corrected. “Twenty-five, huh? I left 17 years ago, so you were eight.” Eric’s movements stilled and Van stood there, his shoulders slumped. “I had to leave, Campbell.”
“Why?” Van asked, his voice soft, almost sounding like that eight-year-old.
“I couldn’t be around dad anymore. I couldn’t come to this house, be a part of this life.” His voice started to grow softer, and he quickly cleared this throat. “And besides, you should thank me!” Eric came up behind Van and thumped him on the shoulder.
Van turned quickly and clipped Eric on the chin. It wasn’t part of the script, but both of them were living in the moment of their characters and reacting, using the words they knew to say with the actions they instinctively felt.
Eric went down for a moment, and Van immediately crouched next to him. “I am so, so sorry,” he said, reaching for Eric’s face, holding it in his hands. “Are you all right?” Van asked, his gaze searching Eric’s face.
The redhead was stunned and then he reached up and grasped Van’s hands in his own. “I’m fine,” he assured him.
The younger man’s eyes narrowed, not sure if he believed Eric or not. “I shouldn’t have-”
“Good instinct with the move, Van!” Neil called. “But if you continue to use that bit, let Eric and I know so our leading man isn’t left flat on his ass every night.”
The two actors looked at each other and Eric chuckled. “I would appreciate that myself,” he muttered.
Van shook his head and started to stand up. He let go of Eric’s face and reached for the other man’s hands, helping him up. “You sure you’re all right?” he asked, his hand automatically going out and his fingers tucked under Eric’s chin.
“I’m fine. But if I knew this is how you’d react to me not calling for a few years, I promise to keep in touch next time.”
Van briefly bumped his forehead to Eric’s. “You better,” he insisted. Realizing the gesture was a little too friendly, he immediately jumped back. Being around Eric made Van feel a little off, and he wasn’t sure why. He kind of felt like a nervous teenager with a crush, and all you wanted to do was touch the other person. But he was way past the age of adolescence and touching Eric was out of the question. Van took another step back, creating more distance between himself and Eric.
“Sorry!” Van called out to Neil again. “Where do you want us to start?”
“Eric’s line of ‘you should thank me,’” the director instructed them.
Van moved to his mark, not looking at Eric. The redhead felt a little flustered, and he attributed it to the knock he got from his co-star. He felt a little buzzed, nervous energy racing through him. Eric looked at Van for a moment and took a breath, trying to get back to his line.
“And besides, you should thank me!” Eric came up behind Van and thumped him on the shoulder again.
Van swung again and Eric automatically ducked, even though he knew Van was flustered, he’d keep the action in. There was a hint of smile on Van’s face, his eyes locked with Eric’s for a half-second.
“Thank you!” Van exclaimed, sarcasm dripping from his voice. “For what? Leaving me? Making me stay up every night praying you would come, looking out the window for you, writing letters to Santa, begging him to bring back my big brother.”
He could hear the emotion in Van’s voice, the way his voice sounded thick, like there was something blocking the sound of the words trying to come out. Eric had to hold his ground, because if Van started to give into that emotion, he wasn’t sure if he could hold back. His character, Davis, had to be angry and sure of himself. Seeing the pain radiating off of Van’s body sent a sucker punch to Eric’s gut, and he was still reeling from the clip on his chin. The older man felt off-kilter, like he could be knocked over with just one more push from Van. “Half-brother,” Eric said again.
“And full jackass,” Van noted. “Why on earth would you want me to learn that lesson?”
“Campbell, I couldn’t stay,” Eric responded, some of the anger leaving his voice. “Father was…full jackass. I was never enough, I would never be enough. I learned that lesson when I was eight and he walked out on my mother and me because he’d gotten his girlfriend pregnant.”
Van turned, shuffling away, not wanting to look at Eric, not wanting to hear what “Davis” was telling “Campbell.” He stopped when he heard Eric’s hurried feet come up behind him. “Now, who’s running away?” he asked, grabbing Van’s arm and tugging so the man had to face him.
Van’s hand was down at his side and it started to form a fist. He started shaking, knowing that “Campbell” was ready to deck “Davis.” But Van lost it for a moment, seeing the look in Eric’s eyes. There was so much pain and hurt and Van was pulled out of the scene. One of the things he loved about working with Eric was the way he could convey so much with his eyes. When they worked together, he loved to watch Eric, see what he was going to do, what emotion he would convey. For that moment, he was lost thinking of the Eric he knew and had loved working with, and that he’d lost touch with a good friend, a man he had missed more than he would like to admit.
The blonde’s hand slowly unclenched itself and he tried to move, but Eric’s hold on him wouldn’t give, in fact it tightened. “I guess that’s another lesson I learned from my half-brother.”
Eric did let go this time and Van shuddered, fear and hurt wracking his body. “He had you,” Eric said, the fight leaving his body as well. “He had a new son and a pretty wife. He didn’t want to know about me, about the problems I had in school, the girls I wanted to date, the dreams for my future. It was all you. ‘Campbell said “Dada” today. It’s his first word.’ ‘Campbell learned to walk today.’ ‘Campbell is great at math-better than you ever were, Davis. I think he’ll have a place in the business after all.’” Eric took some steps away from Van, coming to the center of the stage. “First son and his second choice.”
“And you’re back now, why?” Van questioned coming closer to Eric again, standing next to him. They weren’t facing each other, their shoulders grazed as they looked straight out into the theater.
“He’s dead. Seemed like a good time,” Eric replied nonchalantly.
A bitter laugh eased its way past Van’s lips. “And if he hadn’t had that heart attack…”
“I wouldn’t be here,” Eric assured him.
“Did you ever…” Van stopped and shook his head. It was tough. He was angry with himself, not wanting to ask if “Davis” ever thought of him, wanted to get in touch with him, more of that misplaced emotion that “Davis” had found so disdainful.
“I didn’t miss this place, and I didn’t miss the family,” Eric responded. He shot a brief glance at Van. “I couldn’t miss what I never had. And it’s crazy to think about, missing something you’ve never experienced.”
“Then I’m crazy because I missed you, and I waited for you. I wanted you to come back.”
Eric’s eyes closed and his back straightened, trying to ward off every sling and arrow of pain that the words coming from Van’s mouth caused him. He turned then to look at Van. He could see the emotion shimmering his eyes. Every instinct in Eric’s body was yelling at him to reach out and comfort the younger man. There were only a handful of times when Eric would react this way to a scene partner and most of them were with Van, and he was briefly reminded of the scenes they shot when Noah had his surgery. Luke had come over to Katie’s house and they were arguing, Reid in pain over the complications and Luke freaking out. The scene had ended with a kiss, but Eric pulled himself up short, knowing that they were playing half-brothers and this scene certainly couldn’t end that way. But why did his arms ache to hold Van?
“Well, let’s get this over with,” Van said and headed back to his entrance. “You want to know your lot from dear ol’ dad and I want…” He shook his head. “Doesn’t matter what I want, didn’t matter when I was eight and it sure as hell doesn’t matter now.” Van then stalked off the stage.
Eric watched him for a moment. He opened his mouth and then quickly closed it. Eric squared his shoulders and took determined steps off the stage, following Van.
“Outstanding!” Neil called from the director’s table, and the few cast members clapped in response.
Van and Eric made their way back to the stage. Van automatically reached out for Eric’s hand, and the redhead tugged, pulling him close, wanting to give Van that hug he couldn’t earlier.
“You were amazing,” Van whispered into his ear, patting him gently on the back. He pulled away slightly, his hands resting on Eric’s shoulders. “Sorry about decking you.”
Eric chuckled. “Yeah, we’re going to have to work on that.”
“Great work guys!” Neil called again. “Let’s go over it again from the top. And Van, keep the move in, but don’t hit him!”
“I promise!” Van called out and shot a wink at Eric.
Eric smiled and knew that the little skip of beat in his heart was because of adrenaline. He was glad to be back on the stage again, he belonged there. And if he was working with Van again, that was just part of it, nothing to do with the wink or the way Van’s hands felt holding his face.
*
Nine months after the show wrapped, and Van found himself sitting next to Jake in an auditorium in Las Vegas. He’d missed the Emmys last year. He wasn’t nominated, and he wasn’t presenting. So hoping to save money, he’d watched from his apartment in New York, seeing three of his co-stars win, though, had been an amazing experience. Everyone was still in state of shock after the show had wrapped just a few days earlier. This time, Van was nominated, and he was presenting with Jake and Eric. Some distance and time helped, the people from the show weren’t walking around in a state of shell shock. It was time to celebrate and enjoy seeing each other.
Van was extremely grateful to see Eric again. Van and Jake had both gone to the west coast to find work. Jake landed a soap almost immediately, and Van did a couple of movies. They were still best friends and saw each other whenever they could. Eric had stayed in New York, working on the stage, and they had had dinner a few times after the show wrapped, but that was about it.
One of the actresses Jake worked with came out onto the stage. They were announcing Van’s category. Automatically, he reached for Jake’s hand. He kept telling himself he wasn’t going to win. He’d been nominated before and hadn’t, and with the show gone now, he wasn’t expecting to be in this place again. But then he had been given the episode of Noah’s surgery and then he episode when Reid had died. The anger, fear and pain he had to unload. The episodes were cathartic and sharing those scenes with Eric both times had been an experience Van had rarely felt, and one that he didn’t expect to have after playing Luke for so long.
The actress finished reading the names and then he heard, “The Emmy goes to…Van Hansis, As the World Turns.”
Van’s arm was being jerked up as Jake stood in his excitement and pulled Van close to himself. The blonde still couldn’t believe it. He looked at Jake. “Did she-”
“You won!” Jake insisted and pushed him toward the stage.
Van turned back. Eric and his wife were seated a couple of rows behind him. Eric had been nominated as well, but they hadn’t gotten to his category yet. Van’s gaze locked with Eric’s who was smiling and clapping. “Congratulations!” the redhead mouthed to him and it all started to sink in.
Van quickly made his way up the stage and accepted his award. “What am I doing up here?” he began, and there was applause and laughter from the audience. “I…I have a million people to thank and they’re going to kick me off, I know. First my parents for their love and support, the amazing writers for creating Luke and letting me play him until the end. My best friend, Jake Silbermann.” More applause and wild cheering. Van chuckled, thinking of his wonderful fans that were still supporting him. “You and Noah made me and Luke who we were. And I have to thank Eric Sheffer Stevens, you let me be angry and hateful to you and you never took it personally,” he said incredulously, his eyes searching again for Jake and then Eric. There was some more applause. “I had the privilege of working with amazing people on the show but you two, those last few months, made playing Luke one of the best times I ever had and I know it was in large part because of you. Thank you everyone!”
The actor was ushered off the stage and sent to the press room. He was still in a state of shock, wondering how he had made it here. The press were firing questions, asking how he was doing, was it bittersweet to win after the show ended. Was there anyone he forgot? More he wanted to say.
Van reiterated his love and respect for the actors he worked with, especially Jake and Eric. “The scenes I submitted, the writers, of course, gave me such incredible material. But poor Eric.” Van chuckled softly to himself. “I had to push him and smack him so much the first couple of months we worked together. But he was just so there in those scenes with me. I have been blessed by him and Jake; they allowed me to be vulnerable and a mess, and I trusted that they would be there each step of the way. And they were. I miss that the most, having complete trust in my scene partner, knowing that they wouldn’t let me completely fall apart, but if I did, they would be in pieces with me.”
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So this was written quite a while ago before Van didn’t submit for Emmy consideration. Also, the play the guys are doing, all the scenes are completely made up by me. Once again your support for continuing on is greatly appreciated. Thank you. ~Ali
Onto Chapter Four...