Fic: Let Me (Get What I Want) Part Two
Title: Let Me (Get What I Want)
Author: gradgirl (aka Ali)
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: ~12,000
Summary: “What’s going on with you and Luke Snyder?”
Author’s Notes: Written for sripley for LuRe Santa Project. Hope you enjoyed it. :-) And finally, broken into 4 posts due to posting size thank you for reading!
Thank Yous: Thanks to my amazing beta, reilaroo. I honestly can’t post anything without you. And thank you to jassanja for creating and organizing the LuRe Santa Project. It was so much fun and wouldn’t have done it without you. And finally thank you for anyone who reads and comments. I appreciate it beyond words.
Previous Parts: { One}
Part Two
The rest of the afternoon went by in a blur of consults, patient notes, and making a few nurses cry. All in all, it was a good day. And it wasn’t over yet. A part of Reid was actually looking forward to his dinner, and it was about more than just the food. Reid knew it would be good for him to get out, focus on something other than surgery and this new wing, which both seem to be inexplicably tied to Mr. Snyder.
“Damn,” he muttered under his breath. He’d gone almost a whole hour without thinking about the young man.
“Everything all right?”
Reid turned suddenly. He was in the doctor’s lounge, taking off his lab coat, and getting ready to head out when he’d heard Luke’s voice.
“This is for staff only, Mr. Snyder,” he replied tersely, trying not to meet the younger man’s gaze. For once, Reid wanted to get through a day without some sort of email or meeting with Luke Snyder. Today wasn’t that day.
“I sent you an email this morning. You never responded,” the blonde noted, shoving his hands into the pocket of his pants. He stood in place, but his feet shuffled a little.
The doctor crossed his arms over his chest, and he was reminded of how young Luke was. It was surprising at the same time because the man in front of him managed to blackmail Reid and run a shipping company and a foundation. Sometimes it’s hard for Reid to imagine what Luke is doing with Noah. With a shake of his head, he moved toward the door.
“Dr. Oliver…” Luke tried when Reid didn’t respond, but he didn’t know what else to say. The other man’s name dying on the blonde’s lips. His tongue darted out, to wet his dry lips.
Reid unconsciously mirrored the action and stifled a groan. He knew the point of this date was to get past whatever it was that the young man brought out of him. Besides, Katie had this gleam in her eye whenever Luke’s name came up.
“It’s after work hours,” Reid finally responded. “I have more important things to do with my life than wait anxiously for your emails.” He moved, closing the distance, because the young man wasn’t moving.
Luke’s hands came up in surrender, and he almost placed them on the redhead’s chest. Both men stopped, their eyes met briefly. The blonde’s gaze found its way to Reid’s mouth and then his eyes. Luke’s mouth opened, his breath danced across the doctor’s face, and Reid’s eyes narrowed slightly.
“Then let me take you to dinner,” Luke offered. The words sounded a little hollow as though he wasn’t sure if they were even coming from his own mouth.
It was on the tip of Reid’s tongue to say yes, but then he remembered a cute drug rep and his plan to spend as little time with Luke as he possibly could. “No,” he said and moved. His shoulder brushed against Luke’s before he made his way towards the door.
The younger man stood frozen for a moment and then he jumped into action. He followed Reid out into the hall. “Dr. Oliver.”
The redhead let out a breath and his eyes glanced heavenward. “Mr. Snyder, I’m off duty from the hospital and you.”
“I just have a few things I need to go over,” Luke insisted. He knew Dr. Oliver would never admit it, but he felt like something had changed in Dallas. It was more than his slip and calling the older man by his first name. He was still confused about Noah, but he was tired of denying that he felt something for the doctor. He hated feeling as if he was alone, that he was attracted to Reid and the redhead didn’t feel the same way. Before Dallas, Luke would swear there were moments: laughter or looks that lasted too long. Despite Reid’s adamant, “Nothing happened between us the other night,” there was something there. Why can’t I just-
“I have a date,” the cool voice of the doctor shut down Luke’s thoughts immediately.
The blonde’s mouth fell open and his tongue suddenly felt immobile. “D-date?”
“Yes,” Reid noted. “Remember what Noah was doing when we flew to Dallas?”
Luke’s mouth closed with a decisive clink of his teeth. He knew Reid could be abrasive but to remind him of something that was obviously hurtful to Luke was going too far. Taking a breath, Luke opened his mouth to respond.
“And here he is now,” Reid replied, seeing Wesley coming down the corridor toward them.
The redhead forced his lips to move up into a smile. He was suddenly looking more forward to this date than he had originally anticipated, and it was one of the few times he had actually made Mr. Snyder speechless.
Wesley saw Reid and his steps quickened, but when he saw the young man who was standing with his date, he hesitated for a moment. Wesley knew that was Luke Snyder. He was concerned that Reid would have to cancel, and he couldn’t help but notice the frequency in which Reid mentioned the young man.
“Hello,” Reid greeted him.
Wesley smiled in return and his gaze went from Reid to Luke. The redhead didn’t seem to be in any rush to introduce them and Luke was standing there, his mouth still open. From his brief encounter with Reid earlier, Wesley could only imagine what his date had said to the young man.
“Hi,” Wesley finally said. “I’m Wesley Roberts,” he said, offering his hand.
Luke looked at the outstretched hand for a moment. Wesley? he thought with more than a little bit of distain, did his mother read one too many romance novels when she was pregnant?
“My date,” Reid added, and he bounced on the balls of his feet. He could tell his announcement had affected Mr. Snyder and the part of him that always acted like an eleven-year-old boy was jumping up and down as well.
It was the nudge Luke needed to respond. He returned Wesley’s shake, his grip a little firm, and he inwardly smirked at the wince on Wesley’s face. “Luke Snyder.”
“Y-yes, I know,” Wesley responded and wiggled his fingers to get the blood circulating again. “Your philanthropic efforts with the new wing are quite popular in the local paper. But really, I think they should write more about Dr. Oliver.” He looked at the redhead. “He’s quite…” Reid found himself smiling at Wesley. “Remarkable,” he finally finished his thought.
“I’m well aware of Dr. Oliver’s extensive credentials,” Luke responded. He didn’t like the way the doctor was looking at this man. However, Luke knew besides food the way to get to Reid was through stroking his ego.
“I don’t think he meant professionally, Mr. Snyder,” Reid added quietly.
Luke’s gaze widened slightly and he breathed through his nose, trying to keep the wave of nausea at bay. He felt oft-kilter, which wasn’t a new emotion around Dr. Oliver, but the idea of the older man out on a date, flirting, or worst of all, starting a relationship… Luke felt every bit of that youth Reid found so disdainful. He wanted to stamp his feet and demand that the doctor pay attention to him and not this smooth talking, Wesley.
“Yes, well are you free?” Wesley checked. He hadn’t received a phone call, but he had to wonder if something was going to prevent Reid from going to dinner with him.
“Let’s go,” Reid said. He started to walk away from Luke and Wesley followed. After a few feet, Reid stopped and glanced over his shoulder. “Mr. Snyder, I’ll get back to you on your ‘email’ sometime tomorrow if I’m free. I’d appreciate it if you didn’t feel the need to track me down.”
“Actually, I was here to pick up Noah after his physical therapy,” Luke replied. The lie came easy enough and a part of him hated it, but then he saw the flicker of emotion in Reid’s eyes. He stifled a smile, hoping that he was right and maybe Dr. Oliver felt it too.
But then just as soon as it was there, the doctor pivoted on his heel and walked away. His shoulder brushed against Wesley’s and they were talking, sharing a laugh. Luke watched until they disappeared around the corner, even then he stood for a few moments. Images of what the rest of the night could turn into flashed before his eyes. Feeling sick to his stomach and like he wanted to punch a wall, Luke let out a huff of air and stormed down to his car.
*
The date went better than Reid anticipated although his expectations were fairly low to begin with, but Wesley was charming. He asked Reid questions about his work, which Reid could always talk about. He didn’t seem concerned or disgusted by watching Reid eat. After dinner, there were drinks and the conversation continued to linger. Neither man was ready to call an end to the evening, and the doctor was grateful that he actually managed to get through the whole dinner without mentioning nor thinking about Luke Snyder.
“This was nice,” Wesley noted, leaning in closer. Reid wasn’t sure why; the restaurant was mostly cleared out, and he was sure the wait staff was willing them to leave.
“Yes, it was,” the doctor responded, and he leaned in closer as well. A part of him wanted to check with Wesley, see if the man wanted to take this somewhere else. But he knew he was just desperate to make sure the date continued because he honestly couldn’t remember the last time he had sex. More than that, it was as though he’d found some sort of cure. He wasn’t thinking about Luke Snyder or snarking with Luke Snyder, and he wasn’t in the presence of Luke Snyder feeling like a nervous teenager.
“I have to head out of town tomorrow,” Wesley noted. “More stops to make, but I should be back by the end of the week.” There was a hopeful tone in his voice and a leading response in his eyes.
Reid smiled, grateful that he didn’t bring up that conversation. He had Noah’s surgery in a couple of days, but by the time Wesley got back, it would be over. He’d provide the “miracle” that Luke expected. Damn it, he thought. He did not want to bring Luke on this date, but the escape didn’t last long. He was back to this: wanting a man who didn’t want him, and playing out some sort of high school drama with the ex of one of his patients.
“Reid?” Wesley checked, his head tilted to the side as though trying to read the doctor’s thoughts.
“That sounds great,” he finally responded. “I have a major surgery scheduled in two days, but it should go fine. I’ll look forward to sharing my brilliance with you.”
Wesley smiled in response. “I look forward to hearing about your brilliance.” His hand reached up, gently cupping the doctor’s face in his hand. Wesley leaned over and pressed kiss to Reid’s mouth. He returned the kiss for a moment and pulled away with a smile.
*
The next few days went by quickly. Reid and Wesley shared a few flirty emails, some suggestive texts, and one phone call that ended with the promise of something more. Reid actually found himself looking forward to his communications with Wesley. They didn’t hold the snarky comebacks that his interactions with Luke did, but Reid thought that that was for the best. There was an obvious thaw between himself and Mr. Snyder, but it didn’t get him anywhere and it wasn’t going to. Maybe he wasn’t as attracted to Wesley, maybe he didn’t get as big a rush out of his encounters with Wesley, and maybe he wouldn’t ever feel a fraction of what he felt for Luke, but everything Luke did was for Noah Mayer.
Reid was reminded of that when he walked into the hospital room of his patient to find Luke sitting rather close to Noah on the bed. He tried to ignore the fact that the blonde jumped up immediately when he saw Reid.
“Ready for surgery?” the doctor asked, walking toward the bed and purposefully ignoring Luke. He picked up the chart and made some noncommittal sounds as he reviewed it, and Noah expressed his excitement.
“Well, the nurse will be back soon to prep you.” Reid’s gaze finally met Luke’s. The blonde offered a shy smile and bit his lip. “Maybe you should not be here,” the redhead said. “Let the medical professionals actually do their work.” He pivoted on his heel, but he heard Luke’s strangled response.
Luke quickly followed Dr. Oliver out into the hall. “Are you ready?” he called after the doctor.
Letting out a breath, he realized this was the last thing he needed before surgery: another encounter with Luke Snyder.
“Excuse me?” the redhead asked, crossing his arms and walking up to Luke. “I’m the miracle doctor, right? You blackmailed me and have been hounding me since I got to town to do this surgery. Now you’re questioning me.”
The blonde stumbled back a little, somehow the coldness in Reid’s voice felt as though it held a more personal tone. There were insults and shoving, but lately, it felt like a tease, a way to get under the skin of the other person and in Dallas… He sighed, feeling so guilty. He was less than an hour away from Noah having the surgery to restore his eyesight, and he was thinking about how much he had wanted to kiss Dr. Oliver in Dallas.
“You’ve been ignoring my phone calls and emails for days. I was just wondering… How are you doing?”
“It’s called working, Mr. Snyder. I don’t have time to respond to your requests for furniture upholstery.”
“That wasn’t-”
The rest of Luke’s sentence was cut off by the sound of a cell phone buzzing at Reid’s hip. The doctor spared an angry glare at Luke before checking his phone. The change in his face was instantaneous and the blonde tried not to notice. Reid smiled before quickly typing a response and putting his phone back.
“As I was saying, Mr. Snyder-”
The blonde couldn’t help but ask, “Was that Wesley?” He practically hissed the man’s name.
Reid wouldn’t allow himself to believe that Luke was actually jealous, and he especially wouldn’t acknowledge the gentle thrill at that thought either. “Mr. Snyder.”
Luke shook his head in disgust and walked back into Noah’s room. He couldn’t believe the man who lived at the hospital was… He couldn’t finish that thought. He plastered a smile on his face, even though Noah couldn’t see it.
*
Luke wasn’t able to spend too much time with Noah, and he tried to ignore all the nervousness he felt. He was anxious for Noah’s surgery. A part of him knew that if Noah could finally, finally get his eyesight back, then maybe it would be time for Luke to let go as well. He’d be able to stop feeling guilty about the accident. And maybe Noah would finally forgive him as well. Luke was also nervous for Dr. Oliver. He wanted the surgery to go well for Reid because he knew how much the doctor cared for his patients and demanded perfection of himself. There was so much riding on this surgery, and the last thing he wanted to think about was some guy distracting Dr. Oliver when… When…
When I want to be the one distracting him.
The blonde, who had been pacing the halls, stopped abruptly at that thought. Of course, it had been simmering under the surface for awhile, flaring up occasionally: the day they were stuck in that elevator, listening to Dr. Oliver talk about Annie Judd, and holding the doctor after they’d heard the news from the board.
*
Reid slowly walked down the hall. The surgery had gone unexpectedly, and the last thing he wanted was to face Luke. It wasn’t the fact that there were complications. That could come about from any surgery. But Luke wanted… He had failed Luke and somehow that felt worse than if he had failed himself.
And then Reid was there. Standing in front of Luke, trying to explain the surgery, watching the hope die in the younger man’s face. Feeling him push against him, seeing Luke’s parents appear and try to pull him away. But the damage was done. Reid had failed Luke and there was no turning back. The doctor wanted to offer an apology, but he couldn’t. He would be left facing a lawsuit and putting the hospital in jeopardy. His left hand twitched against his leg, desperate to reach out, pull Luke close and hold him. He’d even let the younger man hit him, to help him let go of all of his pain.
But he couldn’t.
Going back to the doctor’s lounge, Reid quickly threw off his coat. As much as he wanted a hot shower and a meal, he wanted to go back and get Noah’s X-rays, review the case file, find what he had missed. He couldn’t go back and change what he had done. The surgery could still be a success; they wouldn’t know anything for certain until Noah woke up, but they had to keep him sedated because of the trauma of the surgery. He paced a little around the room, debating his next move, fighting what he wanted against what he could do. Reid felt as though his skin was too tight, and if he could just keep moving, the answer would come.
“Tell me what happened.”
The doctor stopped suddenly and turned toward the voice. Despite their numerous encounters, he had never heard Luke’s voice as it was now. There was anger and annoyance but the hopelessness wasn’t usually there.
“Luke,” he whispered.
The young man’s mouth opened slightly. He’d wanted this. He’d asked Dr. Oliver to call him by his first name. He never expected it to come out this way.
“What did you do?” Luke whispered, ignoring the fact that despite everything, he wanted to hear the redhead call him by his first name again. Pushing away what he felt for the doctor because it was too painful, too uncertain, too everything, Luke decided to focus on Noah and his own need for answers.
“My job,” Reid responded defensively. He was questioning everything he had done; he wasn’t about to let Luke do it as well.
“No,” the younger man whispered with a shake of his head. And he walked toward the doctor. “If you had done your job, you wouldn’t have come to me with ‘complications.’”
“It was a difficult surgery. There were risks. There are risks with every surgery.”
“No.”
“Stop saying that!” Reid demanded. Somehow, the young man had become his guilty conscious. “Everyone knew the chances and despite all of that you tried to bribe and blackmail me into getting here. I did my job. It wasn’t perfect, but-”
“But you’re always perfect!” Luke shouted in response, and he pushed against the doctor. Reid stood his ground, taking the shove. “You’ve been telling me since we met how damn perfect you are! Why did you fail?”
“I didn’t fail,” Reid insisted, although even he doubted that. “I did what you wanted! I have let you push me around. I have listened to you talk about this great love you have. I have done all that you asked of me. You want me to call you Luke now? What next? How many hoops do you expect me to jump through?”
Luke shook his head. He couldn’t make this about him. He couldn’t. He’d allowed himself to think about Dr. Oliver, and to feel… He’d betrayed Noah. “Is this my fault? Did you… Do you hate me that much that you would…”
Reid held up his hand in warning. “Stop right there,” he insisted. “Noah is alive. He will wake up soon and we will know more.”
The room was close and the air felt thick as though the bubble of their own fears and disappointment kept bumping up against each other. Luke’s feet moved, scraping against the floor as he sat down on one of the benches. He felt as though he’d run a marathon. His emotions had been all over the place for so long, and he couldn’t take it in any more: the guilt over Noah’s accident, the desire to be with Noah, the affection he felt for Dr. Oliver, the anger he had at himself for not doing more, the fear of wanting someone other than Noah, and the man that he did want could care less.
Reid watched Luke. The redhead’s chest pounded, his breathing difficult. Every question Luke had, Reid had as well, and he hated that Luke of all people was doubting him. The reminder that he had failed Luke was too much.
“Do you hate me?” the blonde whispered, his voice hoarse, too many clogged tears straining his vocal chords.
Almost of their own accord, the doctor’s feet moved. He swung one leg over the bench. Luke watched the movement and was reminded of watching the redhead mount the mechanical bull in Dallas. He swallowed, angry that he felt a flush of desire just as he had that day. Reid moved with care, sliding toward Luke, his knee grazing Luke’s thigh. The blonde’s gaze was on the floor in front of him, but he felt the heat from Reid’s body.
“Hate you?” the redhead whispered. “How could you ask me that? You love Noah. You’ve made that abundantly clear from the moment we met. Why would I ever want to harm him or you?”
Luke wiped his nose with his sleeve, feeling the tears come quickly. He turned slightly, his thigh rubbed against Reid’s knee, the brush of jeans meeting hospital scrubs sounded loud in the doctor’s lounge. “I blackmailed you. You’re always so cold.”
Reid let out a breath. “I still don’t know how you could ask me… You love Noah. I tried to fix him…” He briefly closed his eyes, seeing Luke hurting was almost too much. “For you.”
The younger man turned suddenly, his knees knocking into Reid’s, and both men were unbalanced for a moment. Reid reached out for Luke, his hands gripping the younger man’s forearms. Their eyes met, and the redhead wanted to turn away. The pain shimmering in Luke’s brown eyes was too much.
“Why?” the young man whispered.
Before Reid could answer, the door to the doctor’s lounge swung open. “Reid, are you…” Wesley’s voice trailed off. He and Reid had had plans for dinner. He’d run into one of the nurses who told him where he could find Reid, and the last thing he expected was to see his dinner date holding a very distraught Luke Snyder. Wesley’s stomach clenched, worried about how Reid’s surgery had gone.
Both men jumped, out of guilt or panic, or maybe they felt that was the natural thing to do. Their individual bubbles of fear and disappointment had somehow meshed together. Wesley’s appearance had crushed their protective barrier, and they were once again vulnerable. Reid moved quickly, standing up. He looked at Wesley and opened his mouth, ready to offer some apology; he wasn’t ready to leave Luke yet. But then Reid turned and it was as though there were shutters over Luke’s eyes. The younger man stood up and brushed past both men.
“You don’t have to say anything,” Wesley instructed. “Let’s get out of here.”
“Wesley, I would be terrible company right now,” he replied.
“You’re going to turn down food?” Wesley checked. “I may not know you very well, but the second email you sent to me was three pages detailing your lunch.”
Despite himself, Reid smiled. “Give me ten minutes. I need a quick shower and a change of clothes.”
“I’ll be outside.”
*
Onto Part Three...