Torchwood -- Mam and Dad
Title: Mam and Dad
horizonssing Challenge: Day Twenty-Five
Date Written: 7/31/08
Rating: PG/K+
Word Count: 360
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters/Pairings: Jack/Ianto, Gwen, Tosh, Owen
Spoilers: Season 02 to be safe
Warnings: Crack and language
Author Notes: Set before Reset, but after Jack comes back. And I just love this idea, it made me laugh for about ten minutes after I came up with it. Lyrics to the song found here
Summertime
by Mae
"There is no way that is true, Owen."
"It is! Tosh, back me up on this one!"
"Well, it didn't happen exactly like that -- "
Jack sighed and took one hand off the steering wheel to rub the bridge of his nose. Owen and Gwen were in quite a mood today and had been arguing for the past twenty minutes. Toshiko had been trying to stay out of it, but now it looked like she'd failed in her valiant effort. Ianto was busy ignoring them all, doing... something on his hand held. Honestly, that man had one helluva tight self-control.
"Was not!"
"Was too!"
"Was not, you liar!"
"Was too!"
Jack slammed the brakes on hard enough to bring the SUV to a nearly instant halt, throwing everyone to against their safety belts. "I swear on all that is considered good and holy in the universe, if you do not shut up right now I will throw you all out of this car and you will walk home."
"I haven't said anything in an hour!" Ianto argued.
"Not you!" Jack snapped back, glaring into his rear view mirror. Ianto hmnped and went back to his work.
Owen was the first to snap out of the surprised stupor, that damn smirk crossing his face. "If we don't behave, will you turn this car around?" he asked.
Gwen caught on just as fast, tilting her head down and trying to hide her grin. "And no ice cream either, Tad?"
Jack could feel Ianto turn to glare at him. Oh shit, he knew where this was going.
"Actually, Jack would have to be Dad," Toshiko oh-so-fucking-helpfully clarified, "since he's American. Which would make Ianto..."
"MAM!" Owen and Gwen finished before the three of them burst out into laughter.
"He cooks, he cleans, he takes care of us," Owen ticked off on his fingers through his laughter.
"You don't want to piss him off," Gwen agreed.
"He's the one who really has all the power!" Tosh added.
"Hey!" Jack argued, turning around in his seat to give his best glare at the children before looking at Ianto.
"I never wanted another," Ianto deadpanned.
horizonssing Challenge: Day Twenty-Five
Date Written: 7/31/08
Rating: PG/K+
Word Count: 360
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters/Pairings: Jack/Ianto, Gwen, Tosh, Owen
Spoilers: Season 02 to be safe
Warnings: Crack and language
Author Notes: Set before Reset, but after Jack comes back. And I just love this idea, it made me laugh for about ten minutes after I came up with it. Lyrics to the song found here
Summertime
by Mae
"There is no way that is true, Owen."
"It is! Tosh, back me up on this one!"
"Well, it didn't happen exactly like that -- "
Jack sighed and took one hand off the steering wheel to rub the bridge of his nose. Owen and Gwen were in quite a mood today and had been arguing for the past twenty minutes. Toshiko had been trying to stay out of it, but now it looked like she'd failed in her valiant effort. Ianto was busy ignoring them all, doing... something on his hand held. Honestly, that man had one helluva tight self-control.
"Was not!"
"Was too!"
"Was not, you liar!"
"Was too!"
Jack slammed the brakes on hard enough to bring the SUV to a nearly instant halt, throwing everyone to against their safety belts. "I swear on all that is considered good and holy in the universe, if you do not shut up right now I will throw you all out of this car and you will walk home."
"I haven't said anything in an hour!" Ianto argued.
"Not you!" Jack snapped back, glaring into his rear view mirror. Ianto hmnped and went back to his work.
Owen was the first to snap out of the surprised stupor, that damn smirk crossing his face. "If we don't behave, will you turn this car around?" he asked.
Gwen caught on just as fast, tilting her head down and trying to hide her grin. "And no ice cream either, Tad?"
Jack could feel Ianto turn to glare at him. Oh shit, he knew where this was going.
"Actually, Jack would have to be Dad," Toshiko oh-so-fucking-helpfully clarified, "since he's American. Which would make Ianto..."
"MAM!" Owen and Gwen finished before the three of them burst out into laughter.
"He cooks, he cleans, he takes care of us," Owen ticked off on his fingers through his laughter.
"You don't want to piss him off," Gwen agreed.
"He's the one who really has all the power!" Tosh added.
"Hey!" Jack argued, turning around in his seat to give his best glare at the children before looking at Ianto.
"I never wanted another," Ianto deadpanned.