TJRBB: Human Touch - Part V
Human Touch
Part V
Mario was lying on the bed still enjoying the afterglow. There was something between them that made him ache for more; it made him long for someone like Tommy in his life. He hasn’t felt like that in a long time. It was hard to stay alone but it was easier than having a secret relationship. He didn’t want that at all. The last years it has been more about one night stands when the longing for a man, for some human touch when it got to be too much. But that was just not the same. And sometimes he just wanted to forget what he was pretending to be and what he could lose and just be who he truly was.
Before he could get too deep into his depressing thoughts, the bathroom door opened and Tommy walked back in the room. He was naked and some missed water drops were glistening along his body. Mario wanted to lick them all away.
Tommy walked slowly towards the bed and crawled up to lay down beside Mario on his stomach. Mario couldn’t resist and started to run his finger along Tommy’s spine. Tommy closed his eyes and smiled as he let out a happy sigh. Mario chuckled and Tommy opened his eyes slowly. Just like that, there was their moment. Mario cupped Tommy’s cheek and leaned down while Tommy pushed up. The kiss they shared was so different from the ones from earlier. There was something underneath, something hopeful. When the kiss broke, Tommy looked in Mario’s eyes. For a while they just stared in the other’s eyes. Then there was a knock at the door and the moment was broken.
“I hope it’s ok, I just got us something to eat and drink.”
Tommy jumped up to put a robe on and get the door. Mario used the time to take a short shower. Then they were sitting together on the bed and eating sausages, cheese and rolls. There were some fruits on the table. It felt so easy to be together like that and they talked about their lives, their families and friends.
“I think I was never in the closet.” Tommy stated while he was nibbling on a pretzel. Mario looked up and Tommy went on. “I was just always gay and open about it. I didn’t have something like an official coming-out, you know? I just dated the boy I had a crush on when I was fifteen and that was all.”
Mario sighed. “Sounds nice, I wished it could have been like that for me. But I guess as soon as I decided I want to have a career as a football player, I made the decision to stay in the closet. I mean there is no way I could have both: a career and a love life. I don’t see a possibility for that. At least as long as I am active playing football.”
Tommy put the pretzel away and scooted closer to Mario. “So, you never had a relationship then?”
Mario shook his head. “Not really, no. I never let someone get too close to me.” His voice sounded so sad that Tommy had to pull him in his arms.
“I’m sorry for you. I could never imagine living like that. There would be a huge part of life missing for me. I wouldn’t want that.” Tommy said as he brushed Mario’s hair back, scratching along his scalp.
Mario turned his head away. “Believe me, I don’t want that either. I just don’t think I have a choice at all.”
They stayed quiet for a little while, both deep in their own thoughts.
“My family and some close friends know about it. They accepted it and I guess they would support me if I decided to come out. I am just scared and I don’t want to be the gay football player everyone is avoiding in the showers.”
Tommy nodded and pulled away from the hug. “I get that. But I still think that it will make you bitter when you stay like that. We all want love and closeness in our lives. We all want that one person to love.”
Mario sighed again and let his finger wander over Tommy’s tattoos. “Deep down I know you are right. I really know that. And a part of me is hoping that once I found that one special person, I will have the guts to act on it. Meanwhile I will try to survive as good as I can.”
Tommy couldn’t stop himself from cupping Mario’s face. “I hope you will be able to recognize the person once you meet them. Don’t let the chance go by.”
He leaned forward and kissed Mario gently. Mario wrapped his arms around Tommy and moaned in his mouth.
Tommy pulled slowly away to look in Mario’s eyes. “Now, you can do me nice and slow.”
Mario swallowed and closed the space between them to catch Tommy’s lips in a tender kiss. And when he pushed into Tommy again and they moved together slowly towards their orgasms, he couldn’t stop thinking, that maybe Tommy could be worth more than just being a one night stand.
Maybe.
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Part VI