Stargate AU: The Alexandrian Tablet (6.1/15)
Pairings: John/Rodney, Rodney/Daniel, Rodney/Lorne, Teyla/Ronon, misc others (mention of whom would be spoilery)
Rating: R-ish
Words: 60K-ish
Genre: AU, Contemporary, No Stargate program
Author's Note: There are 15 chapters and about 60K words to this story, which will be posted at a rate of one chapter per week. Longtime followers of this journal may recognize bits and pieces of this. I was toying with the plot of this story years ago, but could never make it work, until I read the parts I'd written in 2002ish last fall and realized, "Huh. This was always supposed to be a Stargate AU!" Beta'd by the wonderful cathexys. Any remaining mistakes are my own.
Previous Chapter
Chapter 6
"Rodney! Professor McKay!" The shout, if you could call it that, was delivered so quietly, Rodney almost didn't hear it amid the bustle of students in the hallway. When he turned around, he was confronted by Elizabeth with dark red blotches on her cheeks. "Sorry, I didn't mean to shout," she continued, glancing around nervously.
To his immense credit, Rodney's face didn't even twitch. "Elizabeth, good morning, what can I do for you?"
Elizabeth toed the floor with her sensible shoes and fingered the cross against her throat. "I wanted to thank you."
"Oh?"
"Yes, well, I assume you spoke to Mr. Jackson?" she asked.
"Ah, yes. That." Rodney nodded. "Did he come to see you about arranging a more sensible class schedule?"
"He did. All thanks to you, I have no doubt," Elizabeth replied.
Rodney smiled. "You give me too much credit, Elizabeth. All I did was have a word with him to give him the final push. I'm sure your very capable advising laid the groundwork."
Elizabeth blushed from the collar of her conservative blouse right up to the tips of her ears. "I very much doubt that," she said. "Actually, I was wondering...I know it's highly irregular, but...well, what I mean to say...Mr. Jackson is from a culture where women are..." She gave up.
"Mr. Jackson grew up in New Jersey, if I'm not mistaken," Rodney said.
"Yes, but," Elizabeth dropped her voice to a whisper, "he did spend a lot of time in the Middle East, did he not?"
"He spent last year in Egypt."
Elizabeth nodded. "You can't really blame him for having certain cultural mannerism that make it difficult for him to--"
"What is it you wanted, Elizabeth," Rodney interrupted before she could say something to really raise his hackles.
Elizabeth straightened visibly and almost managed to suppress the stammer as she said, "Well, I was rather hoping, you'd agree to become his academic advisor, given the circumstances."
Rodney sighed. "That would be highly irregular."
"I know," she nodded. "However, I think we should make an exception in this case."
"I don't think it would be wise," Rodney protested feebly. "There are rules, after all."
"Come on now, Rodney, you've been known to break those on more than one occasion when it was warranted." She laughed shakily.
"Yes, when it was warranted," Rodney agreed. "I see absolutely no reason why it would be warranted in this case."
"But that's what I am trying to tell you," Elizabeth insisted. "Mr. Jackson is from a background which would make it extremely difficult for a, ah, female professor to advise him effectively."
Rodney raised an eyebrow. "Has he made any inappropriate comments that would lead you to believe that?"
Elizabeth shook her head minutely. "Of course not, he has been very respectful."
"I see."
"I just don't think--" she started, then thought better of it. "May I ask, is there any reason why you can't become his advisor? Some sort of conflict of interests, perhaps?"
"Of course not!" Rodney replied, much too quickly.
"If you're concerned about the extra work, I could take on one of your girls to alleviate the load a bit? Ms. Cruz, perhaps?" Elizabeth offered.
Rodney shook his head. "If you want to take on one of the girls, by all means do so," he replied as nicely as he could manage. "But my decision concerning Jackson is final. The point is, he was assigned to you, Elizabeth, and you having issues with his, er, cultural mannerisms, really isn't a good enough reason to change that."
She pursed her lips. "I could take it to the dean."
Rodney groaned.
"You know he more than likely would agree with me," she continued.
"Fine. Take it to Woolsey then and see what he says," Rodney agreed testily. "If you'll excuse me, I was on my way to--" He never got to finish the sentence. Elizabeth was already hurrying off in the direction of Woolsey's office. Rodney sighed and made a mental note to avoid his office for the rest of the afternoon.
*****
"Greetings, I come bearing gifts," Rodney said to John as he entered the house holding a six-pack in either hand.
"What's the occasion?" John asked, looking up from yet another UPS box.
"The occasion," Rodney replied, "is that unless the bitch shipped over your dead cat today, your day can't possibly have been as bad as mine."
"I don't have a cat," John replied.
"How very lucky for you," Rodney grinned.
"Maybe," John considered. "How high do all your pictures rate on the badness scale?"
"Ouch."
"And my degree. Actually, both my degrees," John continued morosely. "I was wondering whether she was holding them ransom, but it would appear that she wasn't. She did, however, modify them ever so slightly." He held the frames up for Rodney to see.
Rodney winced. "Double ouch."
"Yes. Do you suppose that if I called the alumni offices and tried to explain the situation, they'd send me new ones?"
"This calls for beer, a lot of beer," Rodney said, changing the subject before John could start wallowing.
John threw the frames down on the couch and stood up. "Fuck, yeah. And possibly lounging in the hot tub for a few hours. Wanna invite Teyla and Ronon over so we can bore them to tears with our terrible tales of bad days?"
Rodney nodded. "You do that, I'll fire up the hot tub and stock the beer cooler."
*****
When Teyla and Ronon let themselves in through the garden gate half an hour later, Rodney was on his third beer and in a marginally better mood, but only just.
"So, what's the occasion?" Teyla asked, starting to strip.
Three pairs of eyes turned expectantly to Rodney, who felt a little like having been caught daydreaming through a student's question. "Where do I start?" he asked.
"How about at the beginning, that usually seems to work," Ronon replied, pushing down his boxers and stepping up to the hot tub.
Rodney frowned. "Well, for one thing, I had to nod and smile as Elizabeth Weir displayed some rather unattractive character traits," he began.
"What did she do?"
"Well, she started by making some fairly judgmental comments about Daniel's cultural background," Rodney said.
"She has something against New Jersey?" John asked.
Rodney winced. "I think she was alluding to the amount of time he's spent in Egypt recently."
"But that's--"
"Asinine, I know," Rodney said. "Look, I can't help it if my department is full of blithering idiots."
"You could fire them," John pointed.
"Not when they're tenured, unfortunately," Rodney said darkly. "And Cam's still trying to engineer my death by citrus over that threat to have him teach beginners Greek and Latin for the rest of his career. I'm starting to take it personally. The man has absolutely no sense of moderation--or sense in general, I guess, since the reason I had to threaten him in the first place was to keep him from stumbling into automatic weapons fire. Anyway, Weir tried to blackmail me into becoming Daniel's advisor."
Ronon frowned slightly, while Teyla just looked surprised. "Really?" she said, unhooking her bra and placing it on top of her pants and shirt before shimmying out of her panties. "Did you agree?"
"I didn't agree," Rodney explained. "That's where the blackmail part comes in. She threatened to take it up with Woolsey, so I told her she was welcome to."
Teyla slid into the hot tub and gestured vaguely at the beer. "She's bluffing."
Rodney shook his head, "I don't think she was bluffing. Despite the rather irritating holier-than-thou humbleness, Elizabeth can be quite determined."
"Oh."
There was an uncomfortable silence for a moment and then John cleared his throat and said, "For what it's worth, if I were you, I'd be taking my chances with Woolsey as well."
"Yeah, but you're not the one who's going to be standing there with egg on his face in front of the entire department when Woolsey agrees with her," Rodney pointed out.
"Still better than the alternative," John replied.
Rodney shrugged. "Funny. From my perspective it looks like I just agreed to a whole bunch of unnecessary drama."
Teyla and Ronon seemed to be studying their bottles with deep concentration by some unspoken agreement, but John was meeting Rodney's eyes head-on, glaring.
"Hey, anybody home?" Daniel's voice called from the gate.
"Speaking of the devil," John muttered.
"In the hot tub, Daniel," Rodney called. "Just come in and make yourself comfortable."
"I'd love to, but I don't have any swimming trunks," Daniel replied, walking up to the deck.
Teyla rolled her eyes. "Like we haven't all seen you in the buff before," she said.
"Teyla, hi, how are you," Daniel grinned, then nodded at Ronon. "I thought we'd all agreed we were never going to mention freshman year again?"
Teyla smiled brilliantly. "I was not referring to the streaking incident, I was thinking of that time I walked in on Rodney screaming 'Oh God, yes, harder,' while you were--"
With lightning sharp reflexes, Daniel clapped his hand over Teyla's mouth. "Point taken."
"I'm feeling tragically excluded from an inside joke," John complained, while Ronon merely grinned.
"Trust me, you're not missing anything," Daniel assured him before turning to Teyla. "If I take my hand away, do you promise not to finish that sentence?"
Teyla nodded and Daniel let go. Rodney tactfully averted his eyes while Daniel stripped, and when he looked up, Daniel was chest-deep in water and Ronon was handing him a beer.
"Are you still certain you are gay?" Teyla asked, her eyes twinkling.
Daniel smiled. "Shush! You're a married woman now."
"Oh yes, but we both have a list of five people that are exempt from the wedding vows," Teyla explained.
"I'm touched," Daniel replied dryly. "Rest assured that if I ever feel the need to get with a woman, you'll be first on my list. Now if your husband ever decides to experiment with gay sex, on the other hand..."
Teyla giggled like a schoolgirl. "Sorry, I've already promised Rodney and John first dibs," she said, handing her empty bottle to Ronon, who replaced it with a full one.
"Story of my life," Daniel replied melodramatically. "I'm always late to the party. So, what were you guys talking about before I so rudely interrupted?"
"You, as a matter of fact," John said, grinning.
"Really?"
"Oh yes, it would appear that Dr.Weir is trying to wash her hands of you," Teyla pointed out gleefully.
Daniel looked confused. "What did I do?"
"Nothing at all," Rodney sighed. "She's just being difficult."
John elbowed him in the ribs again. "You're not mentioning the important part here," he said accusingly.
"The important part?" Daniel asked.
Rodney was about to answer when Teyla threw her hands up dramatically. "Oh no, let me, please. Daniel, meet your new advisor, drum roll, drum roll please, Rodney McKay! Pending final word by Dean Woolsey of course."
Daniel gaped for a second and Rodney hurriedly said, "It doesn't necessarily have to be me, even if Woolsey agrees with Elizabeth. I'm sure Jack would be more than happy to...if it's a problem for you..."
Daniel met his gaze evenly and replied, "Not a problem at all. It will be just like the old days."
John barked out a short, hard laugh but kept his mouth shut.
"Well, if you're absolutely sure--" Rodney paused to give him time to reconsider, but Daniel didn't. He sighed. "Fine. If Woolsey agrees with Elizabeth and asks me to change your advisor, I'll do it. Just bear in mind that it will be rather difficult to change later on."
Daniel nodded curtly and grunted his approval.
*****
"Oh man, you just had to bring that up, didn't you?" Ronon laughed, splashing water at Teyla. "Would you stop laughing already?"
"Can't," Teyla hiccupped. "The look on your face..."
"It wasn't that funny," Ronon pouted.
"It was one of the highlights of 1995," John laughed. "I wish somebody had recorded it for posterity; it would have made a great entry for America's Funniest Home Videos."
Ronon threw a strawberry at John, who deflected it expertly so that it hit Rodney square in the face. "Oh for--" Rodney said, wiping mushed strawberry from his cheekbone and wading across the tub. "Hand me a towel, would you, Daniel?"
Daniel dutifully reached across the edge of the tub. "Here, let me," he said, motioning at Rodney to sit down.
Rodney sighed, but slid onto the bench next to Daniel and didn't say anything when Daniel dunked the towel into the water briefly and then twisted Rodney's face around with one hand to wipe the strawberry residue off.
"Anyway," Ronon said. "Remember that time Teyla overbleached Rodney's hair and then, when we tried to dye it something other than white--"
"Please, no," Rodney groaned, burying his face in Daniel's shoulder. "I still have nightmares."
Teyla's manic giggles were interrupted by a series of hiccups and John was braying with laughter. Even Daniel chuckled and stroked Rodney's hair. "I thought it was kind of cute in a very wrong way," he said quietly.
"I looked like the secret love-child of Sid Vicious and Cyndi Lauper!" Rodney protested, his voice still muffled by Daniel's shoulder.
"Yeah, but the green brought out the blue in your eyes, made them look even more intense," Daniel grinned. "Remember, I made you keep it for the night just so--"
"Yeah, I remember," Rodney replied, looking up. "That was the first time we--"
The others had grown quiet, the silence only occasionally interrupted by Teyla's hiccups. Then John cleared his throat, loudly. Rodney looked up, following John's eyes to where Evan was standing leaning against the patio doors.
"Am I interrupting something?" Evan asked.
Rodney shook his head to dislodge Daniel's hand and moved away quickly, not meeting Evan's eyes.
"Hi Evan," John said cheerfully. "We were just reminiscing about college. Why don't you join us? There's beer in the cooler."
"I don't think--" Evan shook his head and pushed himself away from the door. "I'll just wait inside until Rodney is finished... reminiscing. Later." The door slammed behind him.
Rodney picked at invisible fluff on his arms to avoid having to look at any of the others until Ronon asked, "Dude, aren't you going to go after him?"
"No, should I?" Rodney asked.
Ronon shrugged. "If it were Teyla leaving like that, I'd go after her."
"Evan's not a girl," Rodney snapped.
Ronon rolled his eyes. "You know what I mean. You should apologize or something."
"I didn't do anything wrong!" Rodney said.
"Doesn't matter, apologize anyway," Ronon insisted.
"You know what your problem is?" Rodney glared at Ronon while climbing out of the hot tub. "You are so pussy-whipped, Teyla can't help but walk all over you."
Rodney was halfway to the door when Ronon sputtered, "Yeah? Well, at least I don't--"
"Ronon!" Teyla silenced him warningly.
The door slammed behind Rodney and the tub was plunged into uncomfortable silence until Teyla lifted her head to look at Daniel and asked, "You really had sex for the first time that night he had the green hair? Because I always thought you started that around Halloween of your freshman year."
Daniel smiled. "We did. That night was the first time he--it was a first time for something."
"No shit," Teyla grinned.
John groaned. "Of all the things I've always wanted to know about Rodney, finding out the exact date when you succeeded where so many, many other men have failed before and since, really wasn't one of them."
Daniel licked his lips and grinned like a Cheshire cat.
*****
Rodney drudged into the house dripping water. It was mostly his own fault for failing to pick up a towel when getting out of the tub, but just for the time being he felt like blaming that spineless little twat that Teyla had decided to waste herself on. Sure, on a purely aesthetic level he could see why she had gone after him--almost ten years younger, brilliant smile, nice arms and chest that Rodney suspected were the result of spending more time in the gym than any straight man should. However, Ronon's calm and laconic demeanor and cold logic irritated him, and not only because he had been absolutely right about going after Evan.
Rodney took the stairs two at a time and gave the bedroom door a good thump in passing before heading into the bathroom to fetch a towel. When he stepped out of the bathroom, fiercely rubbing his hair dry, Evan was sitting on his bed, staring daggers at him. "Did I miss the big reunion announcement?" he asked coldly.
"What the hell is your problem, Evan?" Rodney shot back.
"Funny, that's exactly what I was going to ask you," Evan replied. "See, there I was in the office this afternoon, and just before I was about to head out for the day, Weir comes in and beats around the bush for ten minutes before telling me that you are Jackson's advisor, effective immediately, and when I tried to protest, she had the gall to claim that Woolsey had approved the change personally." He laughed bitterly. "I thought she'd finally lost her remaining marbles, actually. So I decided to come over here to ask you what the hell is going on, except, I think I rather got the picture just now."
"Evan--"
"You know, generally, it's considered good manners to break up with someone face-to-face," Evan added before Rodney could say anything.
Rodney threw the towel on the floor and his hands up in frustration. "Why does everybody feel the need to point that out to me?" he yelled. "I am perfectly aware of how to break up with someone."
"Then why didn't you before getting back together with Daniel?" Evan shouted.
"I am not back together with Daniel. For all I know he isn't even available."
"I walked in on two of you in the hot tub. Naked."
Rodney buried his face in his hands. "Yes, and you also walked in on John, Teyla, and Ronon, similarly naked, sitting in the same hot tub. What do you think we were doing in there? Having an orgy?"
"You were draped all over him," Evan said accusingly, though marginally calmer.
"There was an incident involving a strawberry and much teasing about hairstyles of doom," Rodney replied exasperated. "Look, I promise you, absolutely nothing happened. You just walked in at exactly the wrong moment."
Evan snorted. "And I suppose Weir made up the whole change of advisor business as well."
Rodney sat down on the bed next to Evan and nudged Evan's knee tentatively. "No, that's probably true."
"Probably?" Evan said. "There is no probably in this case. Either you are his new advisor, or you aren't."
"Fine, I probably am, but not because I wanted it," Rodney replied. "If she really went to Woolsey and asked him to get involved after I refused to give in to her demand, then yes, I suppose I am his new advisor."
"You could assign someone else in the department," Evan pointed out. "Even if she managed to talk Woolsey into letting her off the hook, that doesn't mean you have to step up to the plate."
Rodney nodded. "No, you're right, I could assign someone else," he said. "I'm not going to, for two reasons. Firstly, Elizabeth was being a bigoted bitch and tried to force me to switch and I'd rather not have that happen with anyone else, and secondly, Daniel's explained to me why he's here and it actually makes sense for the two of us to work together."
"And why exactly is he here?" Evan asked.
"He's an ambitious little fucker and he thinks he's found a way to crack Linear A," Rodney said.
Evan snorted again. "Yeah, because he's so much smarter than hundreds of scholars who have dedicated decades of their lives to the problem and never actually gotten anywhere."
"No," Rodney explained evenly, "because he's stumbled upon an artifact that could potentially provide the key to the Minoan language."
Evan looked up appalled. "And you actually believe him when he says that? How gullible are you?"
"A, don't insult me," Rodney began, "And B, I don't have to believe anything because he's shown me some fairly compelling evidence. Look, I know you don't like him much," Evan gave him an incredulous look, "but I really think he's on to something."
"If that's true," Evan replied, "Why does he need you?"
Rodney sighed. "Because he may be ambitious, but he's not stupid. If he has what he thinks he has, he needs both, his own knowledge of language structure, and my knowledge of bronze age cultures in the Eastern Mediterranean and Egyptology."
"So he's using you?" Evan asked much more calmly.
Rodney shrugged. "Maybe a little. I doubt he would have come to me if he had an archaeology background. He probably figured that by asking me to collaborate with him, he'd save himself a few years of work." He bit his lip. "It doesn't matter though, because I want that co-author credit. Desperately. With my name on the paper that reveals the secret of the Minoan language, I'll never have to worry about my career again."
Evan sighed. "So really you're both using each other."
Rodney thought for a moment, then nodded. "I suppose so."
"Should I even stoop to pointing out how fucking codependent that is?" Evan spat out.
Rodney laughed. "Welcome to academia, Evan. We spend all our time either screwing or fellating each other in the pursuit of knowledge." He glanced up at Evan who was smiling faintly in response. "Are we OK?"
"Depends," Evan replied.
"On what?"
Evan grinned. "How much longer do you reckon the kids can entertain themselves in the hot tub without getting into trouble?"
Rodney considered. "A while, I think. When I left there were still a couple of six-packs in the cooler."
"Then I think," Evan said, eyes twinkling, "you should demonstrate the practical applications of academic research to me."
"So we're good?" Rodney asked, his fingers already fumbling with Evan's fly.
"I don't know about good, but I don't feel the urge to kill either you or Jackson anymore," Evan replied. "I don't think you two should work together. I think it's a monumentally stupid idea, and I don't like it for rather obvious reasons."
"But?" Rodney asked.
"But if you're right and your career could benefit enormously from a collaboration, I'll try to set my personal feelings aside for the moment," Evan explained. "That's the best I can offer."
"Hm," Rodney mumbled, nuzzling Evan's cock through his underwear. "Good enough for me."
******
"Come join the party outside for a while," Rodney said lazily from the bed while Evan pulled on his jeans.
Evan looked up from buttoning his fly. "Thanks, but no thanks, I don't think I really fit onto that guest list."
"Oh, please," Rodney rolled his eyes. "They all like you."
Evan picked up his shirt from the floor and pulled it over his head before answering. "I know they like me. Well, John and Teyla do at any rate. I can't figure out Ronon and it's probably safe to assume that Jackson likes me about as much as I like him, but that's not the point." He ran his hand through his hair trying to return it to some semblance of order.
"So what's the problem?" Rodney asked.
"The problem is that you've all known each other for years and I'm the odd man out," Evan replied.
"Evan--"
"Come on, Rodney," Evan interrupted. "You're having a college reunion on your deck."
Rodney sighed. "Fine. I'm not going to force you to play nice. Tomorrow evening then?"
Evan nodded. "Sure. Why don't you come over for dinner around seven-ish? Tell them I said hi, okay?" With that he was out the door.
Rodney stayed on the bed for a moment longer before getting up and digging through his closet to locate his swimming trunks. When he got back downstairs the party had moved from the hot tub to the pool, where Teyla was laughing loudly while Daniel and Ronon took turns trying to dunk her.
"Hey," John said, swimming up to the edge of the pool. "Evan leave?"
Rodney nodded. "He had something else going on this evening," he said. "Sends his excuses."
"Did you guys manage to work things out?" John asked.
"More or less," Rodney said. "Seems like Woolsey took Elizabeth's side."
"I don't need to tell you what a bad idea that is, right?" John asked. "Couldn't you assign someone else?"
Rodney shrugged. "Sure, and make Daniel feel like he's the unwanted younger sibling? Yeah, that would work."
John made a fairly accurate motion of somebody playing the violin and was about to say something scathing, Rodney had no doubt, when Daniel pounced onto him from behind and pulled him under. When John surfaced again flailing wildly and spitting water, he launched himself at Daniel. "You little shit!" he hollered. "I'll teach you to respect your elders."
"Yeah, I'm so scared now," Daniel laughed back at him just before John pulled his head under water. They wrestled for supremacy and Rodney sat down on the edge of the pool to watch the show with his feet dangling in the water. After a few minutes John and Daniel's struggle ceased and their grunting became quieter and more controlled. Rodney quickly looked away, his eyes turning to Teyla and Ronon on the far side of the pool, wrapped around each other and suspiciously quiet, which wasn't any better.
When his eyes fell back on Daniel and John their noses were inches apart, eyes half-lidded, and he had a fairly good idea what was going on under the water from the rhythmic movement of their bodies, even if he hadn't switched on the pool lights earlier in the evening. He was just about to get up and go back inside before they became lip-locked, when John gave Daniel a shove and hissed, "No, not playing that game with you again."
Daniel had the decency to look apologetic. "Sorry," he said demurely as he trod water. "I didn't mean to do that."
John didn't look like he believed a word of it and waded back a few steps. "No harm done," he finally ground out. "I don't know about you, but I could use another beer."
"I've had enough," Daniel said and pushed himself away from the pool's edge to float on his back in the middle looking up at the stars.
John pulled himself up out of the water and sat next to Rodney on the edge of the pool, catching his breath for a moment. Rodney couldn't help noticing he was half hard.
"Another beer?" Rodney eventually asked, his voice much more brittle than he would have liked.
John smiled. "Sure. We'll have to go inside though, the cooler's empty. Mind you," he pointed at Teyla and Ronon, "I think going inside might be a good idea at this point. I don't think my virgin eyes will want to be here in another minute or two."
Rodney squinted in the direction indicated by John's outstretched arm and groaned. "They're about a minute away from fucking in my pool, aren't they?"
"No," John replied getting up from the tiles. "I think they passed that milestone a few minutes ago and are already fucking." He held one hand out to Rodney. "Come on, I want more beer."
Rodney allowed John to pull him up and followed him back inside to the kitchen, where John rummaged through the fridge for a few moments before pulling out a six-pack. "Last one," he said, handing Rodney a bottle.
"Let's take them upstairs," Rodney suggested. "I don't know about you, but I don't really think I want to risk going back outside, considering..."
John nodded enthusiastically. "I'm cured of any heterosexual tendencies I might have had, trust me. Lead the way."
They ended up stretched out on Rodney's bed nursing their beers in companionable silence for a while until John sniffed dramatically and announced: "This room reeks of sex."
Rodney blushed. "Well, yeah."
"So that's why you were gone so long earlier, make-up fucking," John said.
"More like make-up blowing, but yeah," Rodney said.
"Best kind there is," John mumbled before lapsing back into silence.
Rodney finished his beer and was halfway into the next bottle before he turned to John and said quietly: "Must have been hard dealing with Daniel when I left like that."
John shrugged. "He's a drama queen, but so's most everyone else. He's just...he's a lot like you: when he does something, he does it better than anyone else. That pretty much applies to generating maximum drama, too."
Rodney nodded. "He took it that badly?"
John turned onto his side and looked at Rodney for a long moment before asking, "What do you think?"
"I didn't think--" Rodney began and stopped when John snickered. Then he took a deep breath and muttered, "I didn't think it would matter that much considering the reasons things weren't working out."
"You're not that dim, Rodney," John said gently, his eyes never wavering from Rodney's. "First boyfriend. First long-term relationship, despite what you and Daniel were saying. You knew exactly how badly he'd take it."
"Maybe," Rodney conceded grudgingly. "I still had to get away."
"I'm not saying you didn't," John replied. "I was there and those last few months really weren't pretty. All I'm saying is that if you think it was any easier for him just because he had trouble keeping his--"
"Don't," Rodney interrupted. "I don't want to talk about it."
"Then why bring it up?"
"Because--" Rodney shrugged. "Doesn't matter. Just something you said to him earlier."
John nodded slowly and turned back on his back. They didn't talk for so long, Rodney was starting to drift off, when John started mumbling quietly and urgently. "It was tough for both of us, you know. You took off out of nowhere and I was suddenly living by myself for the first time in my life. Daniel was just a wreck, and things happened. I didn't mean them to and it wasn't very memorable."
"I really don't want to know," Rodney said.
"Never while you were still together, Rodney, I promise you that," John went on. "I wouldn't have done that to you."
"Fine, I believe you, now drop it," Rodney replied and closed his eyes. When he woke up at three in the morning, John was gone from his room.
Part 6.2
Rating: R-ish
Words: 60K-ish
Genre: AU, Contemporary, No Stargate program
Author's Note: There are 15 chapters and about 60K words to this story, which will be posted at a rate of one chapter per week. Longtime followers of this journal may recognize bits and pieces of this. I was toying with the plot of this story years ago, but could never make it work, until I read the parts I'd written in 2002ish last fall and realized, "Huh. This was always supposed to be a Stargate AU!" Beta'd by the wonderful cathexys. Any remaining mistakes are my own.
Previous Chapter
Chapter 6
"Rodney! Professor McKay!" The shout, if you could call it that, was delivered so quietly, Rodney almost didn't hear it amid the bustle of students in the hallway. When he turned around, he was confronted by Elizabeth with dark red blotches on her cheeks. "Sorry, I didn't mean to shout," she continued, glancing around nervously.
To his immense credit, Rodney's face didn't even twitch. "Elizabeth, good morning, what can I do for you?"
Elizabeth toed the floor with her sensible shoes and fingered the cross against her throat. "I wanted to thank you."
"Oh?"
"Yes, well, I assume you spoke to Mr. Jackson?" she asked.
"Ah, yes. That." Rodney nodded. "Did he come to see you about arranging a more sensible class schedule?"
"He did. All thanks to you, I have no doubt," Elizabeth replied.
Rodney smiled. "You give me too much credit, Elizabeth. All I did was have a word with him to give him the final push. I'm sure your very capable advising laid the groundwork."
Elizabeth blushed from the collar of her conservative blouse right up to the tips of her ears. "I very much doubt that," she said. "Actually, I was wondering...I know it's highly irregular, but...well, what I mean to say...Mr. Jackson is from a culture where women are..." She gave up.
"Mr. Jackson grew up in New Jersey, if I'm not mistaken," Rodney said.
"Yes, but," Elizabeth dropped her voice to a whisper, "he did spend a lot of time in the Middle East, did he not?"
"He spent last year in Egypt."
Elizabeth nodded. "You can't really blame him for having certain cultural mannerism that make it difficult for him to--"
"What is it you wanted, Elizabeth," Rodney interrupted before she could say something to really raise his hackles.
Elizabeth straightened visibly and almost managed to suppress the stammer as she said, "Well, I was rather hoping, you'd agree to become his academic advisor, given the circumstances."
Rodney sighed. "That would be highly irregular."
"I know," she nodded. "However, I think we should make an exception in this case."
"I don't think it would be wise," Rodney protested feebly. "There are rules, after all."
"Come on now, Rodney, you've been known to break those on more than one occasion when it was warranted." She laughed shakily.
"Yes, when it was warranted," Rodney agreed. "I see absolutely no reason why it would be warranted in this case."
"But that's what I am trying to tell you," Elizabeth insisted. "Mr. Jackson is from a background which would make it extremely difficult for a, ah, female professor to advise him effectively."
Rodney raised an eyebrow. "Has he made any inappropriate comments that would lead you to believe that?"
Elizabeth shook her head minutely. "Of course not, he has been very respectful."
"I see."
"I just don't think--" she started, then thought better of it. "May I ask, is there any reason why you can't become his advisor? Some sort of conflict of interests, perhaps?"
"Of course not!" Rodney replied, much too quickly.
"If you're concerned about the extra work, I could take on one of your girls to alleviate the load a bit? Ms. Cruz, perhaps?" Elizabeth offered.
Rodney shook his head. "If you want to take on one of the girls, by all means do so," he replied as nicely as he could manage. "But my decision concerning Jackson is final. The point is, he was assigned to you, Elizabeth, and you having issues with his, er, cultural mannerisms, really isn't a good enough reason to change that."
She pursed her lips. "I could take it to the dean."
Rodney groaned.
"You know he more than likely would agree with me," she continued.
"Fine. Take it to Woolsey then and see what he says," Rodney agreed testily. "If you'll excuse me, I was on my way to--" He never got to finish the sentence. Elizabeth was already hurrying off in the direction of Woolsey's office. Rodney sighed and made a mental note to avoid his office for the rest of the afternoon.
*****
"Greetings, I come bearing gifts," Rodney said to John as he entered the house holding a six-pack in either hand.
"What's the occasion?" John asked, looking up from yet another UPS box.
"The occasion," Rodney replied, "is that unless the bitch shipped over your dead cat today, your day can't possibly have been as bad as mine."
"I don't have a cat," John replied.
"How very lucky for you," Rodney grinned.
"Maybe," John considered. "How high do all your pictures rate on the badness scale?"
"Ouch."
"And my degree. Actually, both my degrees," John continued morosely. "I was wondering whether she was holding them ransom, but it would appear that she wasn't. She did, however, modify them ever so slightly." He held the frames up for Rodney to see.
Rodney winced. "Double ouch."
"Yes. Do you suppose that if I called the alumni offices and tried to explain the situation, they'd send me new ones?"
"This calls for beer, a lot of beer," Rodney said, changing the subject before John could start wallowing.
John threw the frames down on the couch and stood up. "Fuck, yeah. And possibly lounging in the hot tub for a few hours. Wanna invite Teyla and Ronon over so we can bore them to tears with our terrible tales of bad days?"
Rodney nodded. "You do that, I'll fire up the hot tub and stock the beer cooler."
*****
When Teyla and Ronon let themselves in through the garden gate half an hour later, Rodney was on his third beer and in a marginally better mood, but only just.
"So, what's the occasion?" Teyla asked, starting to strip.
Three pairs of eyes turned expectantly to Rodney, who felt a little like having been caught daydreaming through a student's question. "Where do I start?" he asked.
"How about at the beginning, that usually seems to work," Ronon replied, pushing down his boxers and stepping up to the hot tub.
Rodney frowned. "Well, for one thing, I had to nod and smile as Elizabeth Weir displayed some rather unattractive character traits," he began.
"What did she do?"
"Well, she started by making some fairly judgmental comments about Daniel's cultural background," Rodney said.
"She has something against New Jersey?" John asked.
Rodney winced. "I think she was alluding to the amount of time he's spent in Egypt recently."
"But that's--"
"Asinine, I know," Rodney said. "Look, I can't help it if my department is full of blithering idiots."
"You could fire them," John pointed.
"Not when they're tenured, unfortunately," Rodney said darkly. "And Cam's still trying to engineer my death by citrus over that threat to have him teach beginners Greek and Latin for the rest of his career. I'm starting to take it personally. The man has absolutely no sense of moderation--or sense in general, I guess, since the reason I had to threaten him in the first place was to keep him from stumbling into automatic weapons fire. Anyway, Weir tried to blackmail me into becoming Daniel's advisor."
Ronon frowned slightly, while Teyla just looked surprised. "Really?" she said, unhooking her bra and placing it on top of her pants and shirt before shimmying out of her panties. "Did you agree?"
"I didn't agree," Rodney explained. "That's where the blackmail part comes in. She threatened to take it up with Woolsey, so I told her she was welcome to."
Teyla slid into the hot tub and gestured vaguely at the beer. "She's bluffing."
Rodney shook his head, "I don't think she was bluffing. Despite the rather irritating holier-than-thou humbleness, Elizabeth can be quite determined."
"Oh."
There was an uncomfortable silence for a moment and then John cleared his throat and said, "For what it's worth, if I were you, I'd be taking my chances with Woolsey as well."
"Yeah, but you're not the one who's going to be standing there with egg on his face in front of the entire department when Woolsey agrees with her," Rodney pointed out.
"Still better than the alternative," John replied.
Rodney shrugged. "Funny. From my perspective it looks like I just agreed to a whole bunch of unnecessary drama."
Teyla and Ronon seemed to be studying their bottles with deep concentration by some unspoken agreement, but John was meeting Rodney's eyes head-on, glaring.
"Hey, anybody home?" Daniel's voice called from the gate.
"Speaking of the devil," John muttered.
"In the hot tub, Daniel," Rodney called. "Just come in and make yourself comfortable."
"I'd love to, but I don't have any swimming trunks," Daniel replied, walking up to the deck.
Teyla rolled her eyes. "Like we haven't all seen you in the buff before," she said.
"Teyla, hi, how are you," Daniel grinned, then nodded at Ronon. "I thought we'd all agreed we were never going to mention freshman year again?"
Teyla smiled brilliantly. "I was not referring to the streaking incident, I was thinking of that time I walked in on Rodney screaming 'Oh God, yes, harder,' while you were--"
With lightning sharp reflexes, Daniel clapped his hand over Teyla's mouth. "Point taken."
"I'm feeling tragically excluded from an inside joke," John complained, while Ronon merely grinned.
"Trust me, you're not missing anything," Daniel assured him before turning to Teyla. "If I take my hand away, do you promise not to finish that sentence?"
Teyla nodded and Daniel let go. Rodney tactfully averted his eyes while Daniel stripped, and when he looked up, Daniel was chest-deep in water and Ronon was handing him a beer.
"Are you still certain you are gay?" Teyla asked, her eyes twinkling.
Daniel smiled. "Shush! You're a married woman now."
"Oh yes, but we both have a list of five people that are exempt from the wedding vows," Teyla explained.
"I'm touched," Daniel replied dryly. "Rest assured that if I ever feel the need to get with a woman, you'll be first on my list. Now if your husband ever decides to experiment with gay sex, on the other hand..."
Teyla giggled like a schoolgirl. "Sorry, I've already promised Rodney and John first dibs," she said, handing her empty bottle to Ronon, who replaced it with a full one.
"Story of my life," Daniel replied melodramatically. "I'm always late to the party. So, what were you guys talking about before I so rudely interrupted?"
"You, as a matter of fact," John said, grinning.
"Really?"
"Oh yes, it would appear that Dr.Weir is trying to wash her hands of you," Teyla pointed out gleefully.
Daniel looked confused. "What did I do?"
"Nothing at all," Rodney sighed. "She's just being difficult."
John elbowed him in the ribs again. "You're not mentioning the important part here," he said accusingly.
"The important part?" Daniel asked.
Rodney was about to answer when Teyla threw her hands up dramatically. "Oh no, let me, please. Daniel, meet your new advisor, drum roll, drum roll please, Rodney McKay! Pending final word by Dean Woolsey of course."
Daniel gaped for a second and Rodney hurriedly said, "It doesn't necessarily have to be me, even if Woolsey agrees with Elizabeth. I'm sure Jack would be more than happy to...if it's a problem for you..."
Daniel met his gaze evenly and replied, "Not a problem at all. It will be just like the old days."
John barked out a short, hard laugh but kept his mouth shut.
"Well, if you're absolutely sure--" Rodney paused to give him time to reconsider, but Daniel didn't. He sighed. "Fine. If Woolsey agrees with Elizabeth and asks me to change your advisor, I'll do it. Just bear in mind that it will be rather difficult to change later on."
Daniel nodded curtly and grunted his approval.
*****
"Oh man, you just had to bring that up, didn't you?" Ronon laughed, splashing water at Teyla. "Would you stop laughing already?"
"Can't," Teyla hiccupped. "The look on your face..."
"It wasn't that funny," Ronon pouted.
"It was one of the highlights of 1995," John laughed. "I wish somebody had recorded it for posterity; it would have made a great entry for America's Funniest Home Videos."
Ronon threw a strawberry at John, who deflected it expertly so that it hit Rodney square in the face. "Oh for--" Rodney said, wiping mushed strawberry from his cheekbone and wading across the tub. "Hand me a towel, would you, Daniel?"
Daniel dutifully reached across the edge of the tub. "Here, let me," he said, motioning at Rodney to sit down.
Rodney sighed, but slid onto the bench next to Daniel and didn't say anything when Daniel dunked the towel into the water briefly and then twisted Rodney's face around with one hand to wipe the strawberry residue off.
"Anyway," Ronon said. "Remember that time Teyla overbleached Rodney's hair and then, when we tried to dye it something other than white--"
"Please, no," Rodney groaned, burying his face in Daniel's shoulder. "I still have nightmares."
Teyla's manic giggles were interrupted by a series of hiccups and John was braying with laughter. Even Daniel chuckled and stroked Rodney's hair. "I thought it was kind of cute in a very wrong way," he said quietly.
"I looked like the secret love-child of Sid Vicious and Cyndi Lauper!" Rodney protested, his voice still muffled by Daniel's shoulder.
"Yeah, but the green brought out the blue in your eyes, made them look even more intense," Daniel grinned. "Remember, I made you keep it for the night just so--"
"Yeah, I remember," Rodney replied, looking up. "That was the first time we--"
The others had grown quiet, the silence only occasionally interrupted by Teyla's hiccups. Then John cleared his throat, loudly. Rodney looked up, following John's eyes to where Evan was standing leaning against the patio doors.
"Am I interrupting something?" Evan asked.
Rodney shook his head to dislodge Daniel's hand and moved away quickly, not meeting Evan's eyes.
"Hi Evan," John said cheerfully. "We were just reminiscing about college. Why don't you join us? There's beer in the cooler."
"I don't think--" Evan shook his head and pushed himself away from the door. "I'll just wait inside until Rodney is finished... reminiscing. Later." The door slammed behind him.
Rodney picked at invisible fluff on his arms to avoid having to look at any of the others until Ronon asked, "Dude, aren't you going to go after him?"
"No, should I?" Rodney asked.
Ronon shrugged. "If it were Teyla leaving like that, I'd go after her."
"Evan's not a girl," Rodney snapped.
Ronon rolled his eyes. "You know what I mean. You should apologize or something."
"I didn't do anything wrong!" Rodney said.
"Doesn't matter, apologize anyway," Ronon insisted.
"You know what your problem is?" Rodney glared at Ronon while climbing out of the hot tub. "You are so pussy-whipped, Teyla can't help but walk all over you."
Rodney was halfway to the door when Ronon sputtered, "Yeah? Well, at least I don't--"
"Ronon!" Teyla silenced him warningly.
The door slammed behind Rodney and the tub was plunged into uncomfortable silence until Teyla lifted her head to look at Daniel and asked, "You really had sex for the first time that night he had the green hair? Because I always thought you started that around Halloween of your freshman year."
Daniel smiled. "We did. That night was the first time he--it was a first time for something."
"No shit," Teyla grinned.
John groaned. "Of all the things I've always wanted to know about Rodney, finding out the exact date when you succeeded where so many, many other men have failed before and since, really wasn't one of them."
Daniel licked his lips and grinned like a Cheshire cat.
*****
Rodney drudged into the house dripping water. It was mostly his own fault for failing to pick up a towel when getting out of the tub, but just for the time being he felt like blaming that spineless little twat that Teyla had decided to waste herself on. Sure, on a purely aesthetic level he could see why she had gone after him--almost ten years younger, brilliant smile, nice arms and chest that Rodney suspected were the result of spending more time in the gym than any straight man should. However, Ronon's calm and laconic demeanor and cold logic irritated him, and not only because he had been absolutely right about going after Evan.
Rodney took the stairs two at a time and gave the bedroom door a good thump in passing before heading into the bathroom to fetch a towel. When he stepped out of the bathroom, fiercely rubbing his hair dry, Evan was sitting on his bed, staring daggers at him. "Did I miss the big reunion announcement?" he asked coldly.
"What the hell is your problem, Evan?" Rodney shot back.
"Funny, that's exactly what I was going to ask you," Evan replied. "See, there I was in the office this afternoon, and just before I was about to head out for the day, Weir comes in and beats around the bush for ten minutes before telling me that you are Jackson's advisor, effective immediately, and when I tried to protest, she had the gall to claim that Woolsey had approved the change personally." He laughed bitterly. "I thought she'd finally lost her remaining marbles, actually. So I decided to come over here to ask you what the hell is going on, except, I think I rather got the picture just now."
"Evan--"
"You know, generally, it's considered good manners to break up with someone face-to-face," Evan added before Rodney could say anything.
Rodney threw the towel on the floor and his hands up in frustration. "Why does everybody feel the need to point that out to me?" he yelled. "I am perfectly aware of how to break up with someone."
"Then why didn't you before getting back together with Daniel?" Evan shouted.
"I am not back together with Daniel. For all I know he isn't even available."
"I walked in on two of you in the hot tub. Naked."
Rodney buried his face in his hands. "Yes, and you also walked in on John, Teyla, and Ronon, similarly naked, sitting in the same hot tub. What do you think we were doing in there? Having an orgy?"
"You were draped all over him," Evan said accusingly, though marginally calmer.
"There was an incident involving a strawberry and much teasing about hairstyles of doom," Rodney replied exasperated. "Look, I promise you, absolutely nothing happened. You just walked in at exactly the wrong moment."
Evan snorted. "And I suppose Weir made up the whole change of advisor business as well."
Rodney sat down on the bed next to Evan and nudged Evan's knee tentatively. "No, that's probably true."
"Probably?" Evan said. "There is no probably in this case. Either you are his new advisor, or you aren't."
"Fine, I probably am, but not because I wanted it," Rodney replied. "If she really went to Woolsey and asked him to get involved after I refused to give in to her demand, then yes, I suppose I am his new advisor."
"You could assign someone else in the department," Evan pointed out. "Even if she managed to talk Woolsey into letting her off the hook, that doesn't mean you have to step up to the plate."
Rodney nodded. "No, you're right, I could assign someone else," he said. "I'm not going to, for two reasons. Firstly, Elizabeth was being a bigoted bitch and tried to force me to switch and I'd rather not have that happen with anyone else, and secondly, Daniel's explained to me why he's here and it actually makes sense for the two of us to work together."
"And why exactly is he here?" Evan asked.
"He's an ambitious little fucker and he thinks he's found a way to crack Linear A," Rodney said.
Evan snorted again. "Yeah, because he's so much smarter than hundreds of scholars who have dedicated decades of their lives to the problem and never actually gotten anywhere."
"No," Rodney explained evenly, "because he's stumbled upon an artifact that could potentially provide the key to the Minoan language."
Evan looked up appalled. "And you actually believe him when he says that? How gullible are you?"
"A, don't insult me," Rodney began, "And B, I don't have to believe anything because he's shown me some fairly compelling evidence. Look, I know you don't like him much," Evan gave him an incredulous look, "but I really think he's on to something."
"If that's true," Evan replied, "Why does he need you?"
Rodney sighed. "Because he may be ambitious, but he's not stupid. If he has what he thinks he has, he needs both, his own knowledge of language structure, and my knowledge of bronze age cultures in the Eastern Mediterranean and Egyptology."
"So he's using you?" Evan asked much more calmly.
Rodney shrugged. "Maybe a little. I doubt he would have come to me if he had an archaeology background. He probably figured that by asking me to collaborate with him, he'd save himself a few years of work." He bit his lip. "It doesn't matter though, because I want that co-author credit. Desperately. With my name on the paper that reveals the secret of the Minoan language, I'll never have to worry about my career again."
Evan sighed. "So really you're both using each other."
Rodney thought for a moment, then nodded. "I suppose so."
"Should I even stoop to pointing out how fucking codependent that is?" Evan spat out.
Rodney laughed. "Welcome to academia, Evan. We spend all our time either screwing or fellating each other in the pursuit of knowledge." He glanced up at Evan who was smiling faintly in response. "Are we OK?"
"Depends," Evan replied.
"On what?"
Evan grinned. "How much longer do you reckon the kids can entertain themselves in the hot tub without getting into trouble?"
Rodney considered. "A while, I think. When I left there were still a couple of six-packs in the cooler."
"Then I think," Evan said, eyes twinkling, "you should demonstrate the practical applications of academic research to me."
"So we're good?" Rodney asked, his fingers already fumbling with Evan's fly.
"I don't know about good, but I don't feel the urge to kill either you or Jackson anymore," Evan replied. "I don't think you two should work together. I think it's a monumentally stupid idea, and I don't like it for rather obvious reasons."
"But?" Rodney asked.
"But if you're right and your career could benefit enormously from a collaboration, I'll try to set my personal feelings aside for the moment," Evan explained. "That's the best I can offer."
"Hm," Rodney mumbled, nuzzling Evan's cock through his underwear. "Good enough for me."
******
"Come join the party outside for a while," Rodney said lazily from the bed while Evan pulled on his jeans.
Evan looked up from buttoning his fly. "Thanks, but no thanks, I don't think I really fit onto that guest list."
"Oh, please," Rodney rolled his eyes. "They all like you."
Evan picked up his shirt from the floor and pulled it over his head before answering. "I know they like me. Well, John and Teyla do at any rate. I can't figure out Ronon and it's probably safe to assume that Jackson likes me about as much as I like him, but that's not the point." He ran his hand through his hair trying to return it to some semblance of order.
"So what's the problem?" Rodney asked.
"The problem is that you've all known each other for years and I'm the odd man out," Evan replied.
"Evan--"
"Come on, Rodney," Evan interrupted. "You're having a college reunion on your deck."
Rodney sighed. "Fine. I'm not going to force you to play nice. Tomorrow evening then?"
Evan nodded. "Sure. Why don't you come over for dinner around seven-ish? Tell them I said hi, okay?" With that he was out the door.
Rodney stayed on the bed for a moment longer before getting up and digging through his closet to locate his swimming trunks. When he got back downstairs the party had moved from the hot tub to the pool, where Teyla was laughing loudly while Daniel and Ronon took turns trying to dunk her.
"Hey," John said, swimming up to the edge of the pool. "Evan leave?"
Rodney nodded. "He had something else going on this evening," he said. "Sends his excuses."
"Did you guys manage to work things out?" John asked.
"More or less," Rodney said. "Seems like Woolsey took Elizabeth's side."
"I don't need to tell you what a bad idea that is, right?" John asked. "Couldn't you assign someone else?"
Rodney shrugged. "Sure, and make Daniel feel like he's the unwanted younger sibling? Yeah, that would work."
John made a fairly accurate motion of somebody playing the violin and was about to say something scathing, Rodney had no doubt, when Daniel pounced onto him from behind and pulled him under. When John surfaced again flailing wildly and spitting water, he launched himself at Daniel. "You little shit!" he hollered. "I'll teach you to respect your elders."
"Yeah, I'm so scared now," Daniel laughed back at him just before John pulled his head under water. They wrestled for supremacy and Rodney sat down on the edge of the pool to watch the show with his feet dangling in the water. After a few minutes John and Daniel's struggle ceased and their grunting became quieter and more controlled. Rodney quickly looked away, his eyes turning to Teyla and Ronon on the far side of the pool, wrapped around each other and suspiciously quiet, which wasn't any better.
When his eyes fell back on Daniel and John their noses were inches apart, eyes half-lidded, and he had a fairly good idea what was going on under the water from the rhythmic movement of their bodies, even if he hadn't switched on the pool lights earlier in the evening. He was just about to get up and go back inside before they became lip-locked, when John gave Daniel a shove and hissed, "No, not playing that game with you again."
Daniel had the decency to look apologetic. "Sorry," he said demurely as he trod water. "I didn't mean to do that."
John didn't look like he believed a word of it and waded back a few steps. "No harm done," he finally ground out. "I don't know about you, but I could use another beer."
"I've had enough," Daniel said and pushed himself away from the pool's edge to float on his back in the middle looking up at the stars.
John pulled himself up out of the water and sat next to Rodney on the edge of the pool, catching his breath for a moment. Rodney couldn't help noticing he was half hard.
"Another beer?" Rodney eventually asked, his voice much more brittle than he would have liked.
John smiled. "Sure. We'll have to go inside though, the cooler's empty. Mind you," he pointed at Teyla and Ronon, "I think going inside might be a good idea at this point. I don't think my virgin eyes will want to be here in another minute or two."
Rodney squinted in the direction indicated by John's outstretched arm and groaned. "They're about a minute away from fucking in my pool, aren't they?"
"No," John replied getting up from the tiles. "I think they passed that milestone a few minutes ago and are already fucking." He held one hand out to Rodney. "Come on, I want more beer."
Rodney allowed John to pull him up and followed him back inside to the kitchen, where John rummaged through the fridge for a few moments before pulling out a six-pack. "Last one," he said, handing Rodney a bottle.
"Let's take them upstairs," Rodney suggested. "I don't know about you, but I don't really think I want to risk going back outside, considering..."
John nodded enthusiastically. "I'm cured of any heterosexual tendencies I might have had, trust me. Lead the way."
They ended up stretched out on Rodney's bed nursing their beers in companionable silence for a while until John sniffed dramatically and announced: "This room reeks of sex."
Rodney blushed. "Well, yeah."
"So that's why you were gone so long earlier, make-up fucking," John said.
"More like make-up blowing, but yeah," Rodney said.
"Best kind there is," John mumbled before lapsing back into silence.
Rodney finished his beer and was halfway into the next bottle before he turned to John and said quietly: "Must have been hard dealing with Daniel when I left like that."
John shrugged. "He's a drama queen, but so's most everyone else. He's just...he's a lot like you: when he does something, he does it better than anyone else. That pretty much applies to generating maximum drama, too."
Rodney nodded. "He took it that badly?"
John turned onto his side and looked at Rodney for a long moment before asking, "What do you think?"
"I didn't think--" Rodney began and stopped when John snickered. Then he took a deep breath and muttered, "I didn't think it would matter that much considering the reasons things weren't working out."
"You're not that dim, Rodney," John said gently, his eyes never wavering from Rodney's. "First boyfriend. First long-term relationship, despite what you and Daniel were saying. You knew exactly how badly he'd take it."
"Maybe," Rodney conceded grudgingly. "I still had to get away."
"I'm not saying you didn't," John replied. "I was there and those last few months really weren't pretty. All I'm saying is that if you think it was any easier for him just because he had trouble keeping his--"
"Don't," Rodney interrupted. "I don't want to talk about it."
"Then why bring it up?"
"Because--" Rodney shrugged. "Doesn't matter. Just something you said to him earlier."
John nodded slowly and turned back on his back. They didn't talk for so long, Rodney was starting to drift off, when John started mumbling quietly and urgently. "It was tough for both of us, you know. You took off out of nowhere and I was suddenly living by myself for the first time in my life. Daniel was just a wreck, and things happened. I didn't mean them to and it wasn't very memorable."
"I really don't want to know," Rodney said.
"Never while you were still together, Rodney, I promise you that," John went on. "I wouldn't have done that to you."
"Fine, I believe you, now drop it," Rodney replied and closed his eyes. When he woke up at three in the morning, John was gone from his room.
Part 6.2