Drabblefic #1: Remus and Greyback, "Lessons"

[gilpin25]

For duck_or_rabbit, who requested Remus, Greyback and the prompt malnourish. I should say here and now that I have abandoned any hope of achieving only 100 words in any of these, unless it's in the intro or title. This one's 395 and still feels short...

Comments

[lady_bracknell]

Ooh, nice. And by that I mean chilling.

I really thought JKR missed a trick with Greyback - fanfic Greybacks are always so much more frightening than hers, and I liked this take, Greyback being almost Voldemort-like, knowing everything that goes on and playing cat and mouse with people for his own enjoyment.

[sea_thoughts]

I always thought the idea of Greyback was more frightening than his actual presence. Though wasn't he creepy with Hermione in DH?

[lady_bracknell]

I didn't really think so. Panto!pedo at best, I thought, lol.

[sea_thoughts]

I personally found him very creepy with Hermione. He made my skin crawl. Is it even POSSIBLe to have panto paedophile? ^^;

[duck_or_rabbit]

I read this earlier today, allowing it to cook, and I still haven't arrived at the reaction that captures my reaction. At this point, the best I can give you is a resounding echo of all the comments above. Is it enough if I say it matched exactly what I was gunning for when I threw Greyback in your writerly lap? Jo's evil monsters were conceptually chilling but written merely lukewarm wicked, cool compared to the nano amount of unscrupulous Greyback you just gave. And Remus here so clearly shows that his virtue is his willingness to imitate the villain, that he's strong enough to bear that.

From the perspective of craft, I love that you haunted me with dialogue, not description. Being out of Remus' head and witnessing his interaction with Greyback was where I hoped this would go.

THANK YOU! :D *hugs*

[gilpin25]

I had a bit of an OMG! moment when you gave me the prompt (especially as I was imagining Sirius/OC and 'bath' at the time, no idea why;)), but I'm so grateful you did as it made me write a character I probably wouldn't ever have done otherwise. I do think this was the ultimate Catch 22 situation for Remus; confronted by his personal nemesis, and continually hamstrung by the fact that it is his own goodness, and rule abiding, that defeats him. Having done this shortie here, I would love to have them playing some more cat and mouse stuff sometime. I'd have to find a way to let Remus best him somehow, though I think the interesting thing then would be the cost of that...

Thank you, both for a great prompt and for enjoying it too.:D

[duck_or_rabbit]

I'd have to find a way to let Remus best him somehow, though I think the interesting thing then would be the cost of that...

I would definitely read that, although I already read everything you write. Your take on Greyback's retribution for Remus besting him would be fascinating. As the adage goes, if the devil's in the details, he was right there to greet Remus when he arrived at Hogwarts in DH. I'm really not cruel, I just didn't take it as hard when so many of my favorite characters got spent, lol.

(especially as I was imagining Sirius/OC and 'bath' at the time, no idea why;))

Just wrote a drabble with Lily and Sirius in the bath. Kind of. Maybe that's what you mapped on to? ;)

[gilpin25]

Just wrote a drabble with Lily and Sirius in the bath. Kind of. Maybe that's what you mapped on to? ;)

LOL. Must be great minds. I honestly hadn't looked, today being an almost total non-computer event as, after a lie in, we finally saw The Dark Knight, and then I thought I must do my review replies and... I'm still doing them. While trying to think about the next drabble. But I'll look forward to reading that, it'll be an excellent carrot.:D

[shimotsuki]

I was almost afraid to click on this, because I knew your Greyback would be just this vivid and chilling, heh. But despite the shudders, I'm really glad I did. You've pulled into this brief vignette so many aspects of Remus's HBP mission -- like his trying to find ways to stop the horrors from happening, but not being completely able to, because Greyback is such a horror himself. Or the way he is having a hard time making an argument about this life not being the only choice for a werewolf, since to all appearances even he, with all his advantages, has come down to it himself (I can't help but wonder if Dumbledore (or JKR?) failed to think that point all the way through).

I love the detail of the ink blot and the shaking hand despite the outward calm -- although I don't suppose it escaped Greyback's notice.

I saw above that you might expand this one sometime, and I really hope you do, even though it's going to scare me to read it. ;)

[gilpin25]

I can't tell you how pleased I am people seem to find Greyback chilling as I tried to keep him very simple, and it all by implication rather than anything he said or did. Until the last line, anyway. I think the great thing about Greyback is the idea and implications of him - a seemingly child obsessed monster, who doesn't abide by any rules - and that really makes him both Remus' nemesis and nightmare, in more ways than one.

The idea of them playing cat and mouse, intelligence versus cunning, and Remus being hamstrung by his own code of human ethics is a fascinating one. And one I wanted SO much to see tackled in DH, I think that was one of my biggest disappointments. Though as the werewolves didn't turn up at the end, that's gone down as a definite Remus triumph for me, lol.

since to all appearances even he, with all his advantages, has come down to it himself (I can't help but wonder if Dumbledore (or JKR?) failed to think that point all the way through).I know. It would be great to explore that dilemna in fanfic - I'd

[drumher]

Absolutely frightening! The relationship between the two is much like the one between Batman and the Joker in the new movie where Batman/Remus (and please don't consider this as an invitation to start a new ship!) is a good man who is limited by his goodness to go where he needs to go to be completely successful in his mission. He can't or won't cross that line. Excellent work as usual.

[gilpin25]

Don't jump at the speed of this reply, but I am doing them at this very moment and, spookily enough, I saw The Dark Knight today. (And loved it, though what a Greek tragedy it became for all concerned.)

Am pleased you can see the parallels because I was going for just what you've described - that it's the goodness in Remus that means he's hamstrung when dealing with such as Greyback, who abides by no rules. But I was so, so hoping that in DH we were going to see him best Greyback, both by intelligence, and by showing just a bit of the ruthless Remus who'd have killed Peter for betraying someone he loved. Grr. As it is, I shall have to take the crumb of comfort which was the werewolves not fighting at the end, which I've decided means Remus got through to them...

Thank you! Especially for being frightened. ;)

[katyhasclogs]

Oh Greyback's so creepy. *whimpers*

You really have to write some more about this time - this snippet is so tantalising! I love the complexity of the situation, with them both trying to out-manouvere each other and saying one thing and meaning something else entirely.

Mainly though, I have to complement you on Greyback - he really makes my skin crawl.

[gilpin25]

I'm really pleased Greyback seems so creepy! I always think the implication of what someone is like or could do is usually far worse than what they actually do. And I like the idea of him being simple intellectually, but very cunning because there's no rules he'll abide to.

I do think this was the ultimate Catch 22 situation for Remus; confronted by his personal nemesis, and continually hamstrung by the fact that it is his own humanity that defeats him. Having done this shortie here, I would love to have them playing some more cat and mouse stuff sometime. I'd have to find a way to let Remus best him somehow, though I think the interesting thing then would be the cost of that...

Many thanks. Glad you liked it!:D