doesn't really matter 'cause we're perfectly matched.
Today is esorlehcar's birthday! Just in time for that, I have a little something that is slightly less crack-addled than what came before it, but still Jensen/Chad. Sadly, it's also still without porn.
The title comes from Paula Abdul's "Opposites Attract" because it couldn't not.
You and Me, Proving Everyone Wrong
by Charli J
Chad/Jensen. PG. Sequel to Stranger Things.
Chad can't help that he doesn't give a shit about what anybody else thinks. He's tried. He has sincerely tried to care about or critically consider other people's opinions on the way he handles himself and things he does in life. It doesn't work. He got married twice thinking he'd found the girl who was different, who made him want to really examine himself and change because she wanted him to be some Hallmark version of a better person.
The shit doesn't stick.
"I'm honest," Chad says to Jensen. "And unashamed. Most people can't handle it."
Jensen wipes his mouth with his napkin. He says, "Okay, but that's not what I meant."
"And this late in the game, screw it." Chad holds up his hand to signal over a waiter. He needs a refill. "I don't have any problems with me."
"I can respect that," Jensen says. Chad still doesn't know a whole lot about Jensen outside of what he's heard from Jared, but Jensen orders a beer with his steak meal and not some lame ass salad and, like, V8 Splash. He scores all right so far. "But you can be shameless and still have tact."
"I have plenty," Chad says.
Jensen says, "No, I have tact. I don't kiss anyone's ass, and people still like me."
Scratch that. Jensen's an asshole. "I don't like you."
Jensen looks and sounds genuinely regretful as he says, "I'm sorry to hear that."
;;
Forty-five minutes later, Chad asks, "So, are you saying you don't want to have sex or what?"
"Wow, kinda my whole point," Jensen says. His fingers are undoing the button on Chad's jeans, though, which is all Chad wants in the first place.
And Jensen's so eager and nice about the way he explains it's a one time thing, just between them, without ever flat out saying it that when it does happen again, Chad doesn't rub his nose in it. Much.
;;
Kenzie wants half. Chad tells his lawyer that if she can navigate her way around a fucking calculator and figure out how much half is on her own, right down to the exact damn cent, he'll gladly give it to her. Then he rubs his face and says, "I didn't mean that."
She's mostly a sweet girl. She isn't really dumb.
His lawyer says, "Try not to say things like that during the hearing."
;;
He tells Jared because he can't bear to watch Jared running around like a chicken with his head cut off for more than five seconds. And it's difficult for Chad to have two big things he can't talk about. Of course, Jared chooses that moment to stumble over all eighty yards of leg he has and only ends up looking worse.
"How did it -- happen?" Jared asks like he can't decide if he really wants to know. "You ask him to go out with you?"
"What is this, the third grade?"
"He said you ran into each other the first time," Jared says.
Chad snorts. "I slipped him a note asking if he liked me. Circle 'fuck off' or 'fuck me.'"
"You did?"
"No, Jared."
Jared shakes his head, laughing. "Sometimes you gotta let me know, man. That sounds like something you'd really do."
;;
It isn't a thing and it isn't a thing, and Chad is completely okay with that. Chad starts to go back to L.A. more often than staying in Wilmington on the weekends. Jensen starts to just keep the spare key to Chad's home on his key ring, they have great sex, and it isn't a thing.
It's casual for Jensen, rebound sex for Chad, and in the middle of the airport, Chad doesn't realize he's almost made close contact when he finally sees him at the bottom of the escalator until Jensen leans back.
"Whoa," Jensen says, voice low. "In front of God and everybody?"
"What?"
"You were about to kiss me."
"I was not," Chad says, blowing him off. He lets go of Jensen's arm and shoves his hand in his pockets as he turns to walk out of the building.
It's nothing, it's nothing, it's nothing. Shit.
;;
His manager and publicist suggest he start dating. Get photographed with somebody hot and up-and-coming. Chad doesn't want people to think he's depressed or stressed out over anything happening with Kenzie, does he?
"Stop writing bad poetry or whatever it is you do and get laid," Carl says. "Please. For me and Howie. Make our lives easier. Everybody loves a playboy. Nobody hires a crybaby."
Chad says, "The Sophia thing wasn't a poem, dude. How many times do I have to say that?"
;;
Kenzie still wants half. Chad asks what she needs that much for anyway when she's already living in an apartment he paid off. Maybe she should just get a fucking job.
His lawyer says, "You could even let me do most of the talking while we're there, if you wanted."
;;
Chad can admit that he's not the kind of guy who thinks too seriously about too far into the future. One of the biggest perks about success, steady work, and money is that he doesn't have to anymore. So it makes sense that he doesn't catch on to Jensen treating him to dinner out until he starts talking about how both their schedules are going to conflict now with Chad doing another movie outside of Los Angeles. Jensen has promos to do; they both have other obligations, and it's been fun --
Chad drops his fork. "Whoa," he says, stage whispering over the table, leaning in. "Is this your pussy tactful way of breaking up with me?"
Jensen says, "I didn't even know this was a relationship!"
"Excuse me? Nevermind -- no. Fuck that, no."
"You can't --" Jensen says too loudly, then catches himself. "What the hell? You can't say no."
"Yes, I can. No," Chad says again. "Not 'til you fucking learn how to do it right."
Jensen presses his lips together and breathes carefully through his nose. He keeps making this low, rough noise like he's grinding his teeth.
"Fine," he says. "But stop telling people, Christ."
"It was just Jared!"
"He counts!" Jensen sits up again and smiles amicably as the waitress heads their way, and says, "Two options: you stop talking or we stop -- Hi."
The waitress asks if they want dessert.
;;
Well into her party, Sandy slides up to Chad and hands him another full cup. Chad smells it and downs half.
"A woman with a sense of hospitality," Chad says. "Thank you. And Happy Birthday."
Sandy says, "You're killing Jared, Murray."
"What I do?" Chad says, thinking back. He's been fairly good lately, he's pretty sure.
"Are you two just messing with him?"
"I," Chad says and looks down into his cup and frowns. "I'm not supposed to talk about it."
Sandy smiles at him. "Good boy. Let me get you a refill."
;;
He goes to a couple red carpet events with the same girl on his arm. After the second date, they go back to her place and Chad kisses her. They're stretched out on her couch in the dark, and Chad's barely touched her in twenty minutes other than her mouth, fingers held lightly on her thigh.
She finally says, "Wow, could you be any less into this?" and he fucks her just to prove her wrong.
Afterward, he gnaws on his lip, trying to think of the easiest way to let down, and gets as far as, "You're beautiful, but um -- "
She laughs, pats his thigh. "That's fine, Chad. I got it; don't hurt yourself."
Chad says, "It's not you," and stops short when she giggles louder.
;;
Jared asks, "Are things -- between you -- good?" Jared stills makes this face like he can't figure out where the words are coming from.
"Are you -- okay -- Jared?" Chad mimics him.
Jared ducks his head, has to laugh at himself. "Man, I'm trying. And it's not like you give me a lot to work with."
Chad says, "We're working on some things."
"See? How was I supposed to pick up on that?" Jared asks, waving his hands around. "I don't like this new, 'I, too, can hold water' you. It's fucking creepy."
"Screw you, I can hold water," Chad insists. "I keep all kinds of secrets."
;;
They aren't broken up, but Chad still hasn't seen Jensen for weeks with the exception of CW functions. He goes to his place and buzzes up over and over until Jensen says, "All right, fuck, come up."
He thinks about what he's going to say on the elevator. He's going to apologize for being a neurotic freak. Chad will promise to keep quiet about them. Yes, he slept with that model, and he's sorry unless Jensen still wants casual, non-exclusive from him, because, hey, that's fine, too. He'll say, man, he's getting divorced and everyone's on his case to be better than he is, and Chad can't muster the energy to give a shit about any of them, but he can't get Jensen out of his head.
He's good at messing other people up, but Chad learns from his mistakes, too, so maybe not this time. He goes over the lists of why they aren't a bad idea, starting with the sex, and he plans to list them for Jensen, one by one.
He has it all worked out in his mind for once, the right things to say set to roll off his tongue. He's so ready that Jensen opens the door, stares at Chad, and Chad holds his arms out to start with, "...I got nothing."
"No speech?" Jensen asks. "Boo."
"Can we just," he waves his hand around, "fuck and call it even?"
Jensen shakes his head, muttering, "I must be losing my mind," even as he pulls Chad inside.
;;
At the hearing, Kenzie still wants half. Chad says fine.
"Waaait a minute," his lawyer says. He asks the judge if they can take a moment.
;;
Chad does a bunch of interviews around the season's end to promote the finale and to counteract rumors. He does a morning show, and the interviewer says, "The show's about mid-season, and now -- you're single now, correct?"
"Sure." Chad drinks his water.
"I'm not gonna ask you about details, but are you dating? Are you out there or are you through for a while, do you think?
"That's. I don't think you can really decide something like that," Chad says, shifting in his chair. "You can meet someone at the most inopportune time and fall in love, so I don't want to stick my foot in my mouth, you know?
"Is there someone now?"
Chad sits up in his seat. "You know, my last two relationships were pretty public, so this time. Whether there is or not, I'm learning that I have to play the next one close to vest. Anything new is just for us, which could be difficult for me, because when I'm happy, I like to let people know it."
"You're a sing it from the rooftops kind of guy?"
"With a bullhorn, man," Chad says, and everyone's laughing. "But a friend of mine said to me, dude, that sometimes it's better to cheer privately. It feels just as good."
;;
Sandy calls from Jared's house to say, "Is this an inopportune time?"
"Goddamnit," Chad says. "You watch daytime tv now, too?"
"It was on," she says easily. "Calm down. I won't tell on you if you don't tell on me."
"Shit, fuck, motherfucking -- "
Sandy says, "It's sort of cute how you cuss like a sailor when you're busted."
;;
Of course Chad is standing in the airport waiting for Jason to reappear with Jensen in tow when his manager brings up the newest tabloids. Carl says, "Howie's already out for blood on it. Luckily, they didn't get something like old supermarket snapshots of you and Mackenzie, there's something from on set in the beginning, and one with just you and that Ackles guy."
"You're ruining my day here, Carl. I'm over the settlement bullshit," Chad says, pulling the brim of his cap down more. He tries to turn away as much as possible without obscuring his view of the exit hallway as people come to crowd around Baggage Claim.
In the middle of Carl's reassuring speech about how they're still fine -- as long as Chad stays tight-lipped and Kenzie's people keep her quiet, the press doesn't really have anything to go on -- Chad spots Jensen. He's wearing a blue hoodie, hood pulled up and a duffle bag over his shoulder. He smiles when he spots Chad, and shakes his head at something Jason says as they near.
"Later, Carl," Chad says and hangs up without warning.
The first thing Jensen says is, "You know, nothing says you care like sending your personal assistant. No offense, Jason."
"None taken."
Chad says, "What, Jason gives great hugs," and turning to Jason, asks, "You didn't show him love?"
Jason opens his arms. Jensen snorts.
"What? You said discreet."
Chad makes Jason walk between them.
;;
He lasts until they get to the parking garage. They're hidden in the corner where the car is, standing at the rear. Jensen loads his bag, and Chad stops him before he closes the trunk.
He says, "Dude, God is still watching, but Jason will gladly turn his head."
Jensen smirks, looking over to where Jason's leaning on the railing. He's squinting into the sunlight, away from them.
Chad waits a few short seconds and then makes Jensen's decision for him, saying, "Jensen, fuck. I've earned it."
Jensen tastes vaguely sweet, like maybe he'd been sucking on candies the whole flight. Chad touches his hip, tucks his hand underneath the hoodie just enough to feel smooth line of skin. Jensen pulls closer, pushing Chad's hat back and out of the way, soft mouth and rough hands, and Chad wants. He always wants it so much.
;;
"How long has it been?" Jared says, crumbling up his napkin and dropping it on his plate.
Jensen looks at Chad and makes a face. "Maybe, five months?"
"Five months," Chad says, nodding. "Yeah, that first lunch was in June, July."
"Fucking lunch," Jared says, disbelieving. "And you just -- hooked up?"
Jensen finished off his lemonade, slurping through a straw. He sets down his glass and says, "He slipped me a note."
Jared stands up and walks out of the restaurant, Chad cracking up as he goes.
;;
And yet another follow-up: Third Verse, Same as the First.
The title comes from Paula Abdul's "Opposites Attract" because it couldn't not.
You and Me, Proving Everyone Wrong
by Charli J
Chad/Jensen. PG. Sequel to Stranger Things.
Chad can't help that he doesn't give a shit about what anybody else thinks. He's tried. He has sincerely tried to care about or critically consider other people's opinions on the way he handles himself and things he does in life. It doesn't work. He got married twice thinking he'd found the girl who was different, who made him want to really examine himself and change because she wanted him to be some Hallmark version of a better person.
The shit doesn't stick.
"I'm honest," Chad says to Jensen. "And unashamed. Most people can't handle it."
Jensen wipes his mouth with his napkin. He says, "Okay, but that's not what I meant."
"And this late in the game, screw it." Chad holds up his hand to signal over a waiter. He needs a refill. "I don't have any problems with me."
"I can respect that," Jensen says. Chad still doesn't know a whole lot about Jensen outside of what he's heard from Jared, but Jensen orders a beer with his steak meal and not some lame ass salad and, like, V8 Splash. He scores all right so far. "But you can be shameless and still have tact."
"I have plenty," Chad says.
Jensen says, "No, I have tact. I don't kiss anyone's ass, and people still like me."
Scratch that. Jensen's an asshole. "I don't like you."
Jensen looks and sounds genuinely regretful as he says, "I'm sorry to hear that."
;;
Forty-five minutes later, Chad asks, "So, are you saying you don't want to have sex or what?"
"Wow, kinda my whole point," Jensen says. His fingers are undoing the button on Chad's jeans, though, which is all Chad wants in the first place.
And Jensen's so eager and nice about the way he explains it's a one time thing, just between them, without ever flat out saying it that when it does happen again, Chad doesn't rub his nose in it. Much.
;;
Kenzie wants half. Chad tells his lawyer that if she can navigate her way around a fucking calculator and figure out how much half is on her own, right down to the exact damn cent, he'll gladly give it to her. Then he rubs his face and says, "I didn't mean that."
She's mostly a sweet girl. She isn't really dumb.
His lawyer says, "Try not to say things like that during the hearing."
;;
He tells Jared because he can't bear to watch Jared running around like a chicken with his head cut off for more than five seconds. And it's difficult for Chad to have two big things he can't talk about. Of course, Jared chooses that moment to stumble over all eighty yards of leg he has and only ends up looking worse.
"How did it -- happen?" Jared asks like he can't decide if he really wants to know. "You ask him to go out with you?"
"What is this, the third grade?"
"He said you ran into each other the first time," Jared says.
Chad snorts. "I slipped him a note asking if he liked me. Circle 'fuck off' or 'fuck me.'"
"You did?"
"No, Jared."
Jared shakes his head, laughing. "Sometimes you gotta let me know, man. That sounds like something you'd really do."
;;
It isn't a thing and it isn't a thing, and Chad is completely okay with that. Chad starts to go back to L.A. more often than staying in Wilmington on the weekends. Jensen starts to just keep the spare key to Chad's home on his key ring, they have great sex, and it isn't a thing.
It's casual for Jensen, rebound sex for Chad, and in the middle of the airport, Chad doesn't realize he's almost made close contact when he finally sees him at the bottom of the escalator until Jensen leans back.
"Whoa," Jensen says, voice low. "In front of God and everybody?"
"What?"
"You were about to kiss me."
"I was not," Chad says, blowing him off. He lets go of Jensen's arm and shoves his hand in his pockets as he turns to walk out of the building.
It's nothing, it's nothing, it's nothing. Shit.
;;
His manager and publicist suggest he start dating. Get photographed with somebody hot and up-and-coming. Chad doesn't want people to think he's depressed or stressed out over anything happening with Kenzie, does he?
"Stop writing bad poetry or whatever it is you do and get laid," Carl says. "Please. For me and Howie. Make our lives easier. Everybody loves a playboy. Nobody hires a crybaby."
Chad says, "The Sophia thing wasn't a poem, dude. How many times do I have to say that?"
;;
Kenzie still wants half. Chad asks what she needs that much for anyway when she's already living in an apartment he paid off. Maybe she should just get a fucking job.
His lawyer says, "You could even let me do most of the talking while we're there, if you wanted."
;;
Chad can admit that he's not the kind of guy who thinks too seriously about too far into the future. One of the biggest perks about success, steady work, and money is that he doesn't have to anymore. So it makes sense that he doesn't catch on to Jensen treating him to dinner out until he starts talking about how both their schedules are going to conflict now with Chad doing another movie outside of Los Angeles. Jensen has promos to do; they both have other obligations, and it's been fun --
Chad drops his fork. "Whoa," he says, stage whispering over the table, leaning in. "Is this your pussy tactful way of breaking up with me?"
Jensen says, "I didn't even know this was a relationship!"
"Excuse me? Nevermind -- no. Fuck that, no."
"You can't --" Jensen says too loudly, then catches himself. "What the hell? You can't say no."
"Yes, I can. No," Chad says again. "Not 'til you fucking learn how to do it right."
Jensen presses his lips together and breathes carefully through his nose. He keeps making this low, rough noise like he's grinding his teeth.
"Fine," he says. "But stop telling people, Christ."
"It was just Jared!"
"He counts!" Jensen sits up again and smiles amicably as the waitress heads their way, and says, "Two options: you stop talking or we stop -- Hi."
The waitress asks if they want dessert.
;;
Well into her party, Sandy slides up to Chad and hands him another full cup. Chad smells it and downs half.
"A woman with a sense of hospitality," Chad says. "Thank you. And Happy Birthday."
Sandy says, "You're killing Jared, Murray."
"What I do?" Chad says, thinking back. He's been fairly good lately, he's pretty sure.
"Are you two just messing with him?"
"I," Chad says and looks down into his cup and frowns. "I'm not supposed to talk about it."
Sandy smiles at him. "Good boy. Let me get you a refill."
;;
He goes to a couple red carpet events with the same girl on his arm. After the second date, they go back to her place and Chad kisses her. They're stretched out on her couch in the dark, and Chad's barely touched her in twenty minutes other than her mouth, fingers held lightly on her thigh.
She finally says, "Wow, could you be any less into this?" and he fucks her just to prove her wrong.
Afterward, he gnaws on his lip, trying to think of the easiest way to let down, and gets as far as, "You're beautiful, but um -- "
She laughs, pats his thigh. "That's fine, Chad. I got it; don't hurt yourself."
Chad says, "It's not you," and stops short when she giggles louder.
;;
Jared asks, "Are things -- between you -- good?" Jared stills makes this face like he can't figure out where the words are coming from.
"Are you -- okay -- Jared?" Chad mimics him.
Jared ducks his head, has to laugh at himself. "Man, I'm trying. And it's not like you give me a lot to work with."
Chad says, "We're working on some things."
"See? How was I supposed to pick up on that?" Jared asks, waving his hands around. "I don't like this new, 'I, too, can hold water' you. It's fucking creepy."
"Screw you, I can hold water," Chad insists. "I keep all kinds of secrets."
;;
They aren't broken up, but Chad still hasn't seen Jensen for weeks with the exception of CW functions. He goes to his place and buzzes up over and over until Jensen says, "All right, fuck, come up."
He thinks about what he's going to say on the elevator. He's going to apologize for being a neurotic freak. Chad will promise to keep quiet about them. Yes, he slept with that model, and he's sorry unless Jensen still wants casual, non-exclusive from him, because, hey, that's fine, too. He'll say, man, he's getting divorced and everyone's on his case to be better than he is, and Chad can't muster the energy to give a shit about any of them, but he can't get Jensen out of his head.
He's good at messing other people up, but Chad learns from his mistakes, too, so maybe not this time. He goes over the lists of why they aren't a bad idea, starting with the sex, and he plans to list them for Jensen, one by one.
He has it all worked out in his mind for once, the right things to say set to roll off his tongue. He's so ready that Jensen opens the door, stares at Chad, and Chad holds his arms out to start with, "...I got nothing."
"No speech?" Jensen asks. "Boo."
"Can we just," he waves his hand around, "fuck and call it even?"
Jensen shakes his head, muttering, "I must be losing my mind," even as he pulls Chad inside.
;;
At the hearing, Kenzie still wants half. Chad says fine.
"Waaait a minute," his lawyer says. He asks the judge if they can take a moment.
;;
Chad does a bunch of interviews around the season's end to promote the finale and to counteract rumors. He does a morning show, and the interviewer says, "The show's about mid-season, and now -- you're single now, correct?"
"Sure." Chad drinks his water.
"I'm not gonna ask you about details, but are you dating? Are you out there or are you through for a while, do you think?
"That's. I don't think you can really decide something like that," Chad says, shifting in his chair. "You can meet someone at the most inopportune time and fall in love, so I don't want to stick my foot in my mouth, you know?
"Is there someone now?"
Chad sits up in his seat. "You know, my last two relationships were pretty public, so this time. Whether there is or not, I'm learning that I have to play the next one close to vest. Anything new is just for us, which could be difficult for me, because when I'm happy, I like to let people know it."
"You're a sing it from the rooftops kind of guy?"
"With a bullhorn, man," Chad says, and everyone's laughing. "But a friend of mine said to me, dude, that sometimes it's better to cheer privately. It feels just as good."
;;
Sandy calls from Jared's house to say, "Is this an inopportune time?"
"Goddamnit," Chad says. "You watch daytime tv now, too?"
"It was on," she says easily. "Calm down. I won't tell on you if you don't tell on me."
"Shit, fuck, motherfucking -- "
Sandy says, "It's sort of cute how you cuss like a sailor when you're busted."
;;
Of course Chad is standing in the airport waiting for Jason to reappear with Jensen in tow when his manager brings up the newest tabloids. Carl says, "Howie's already out for blood on it. Luckily, they didn't get something like old supermarket snapshots of you and Mackenzie, there's something from on set in the beginning, and one with just you and that Ackles guy."
"You're ruining my day here, Carl. I'm over the settlement bullshit," Chad says, pulling the brim of his cap down more. He tries to turn away as much as possible without obscuring his view of the exit hallway as people come to crowd around Baggage Claim.
In the middle of Carl's reassuring speech about how they're still fine -- as long as Chad stays tight-lipped and Kenzie's people keep her quiet, the press doesn't really have anything to go on -- Chad spots Jensen. He's wearing a blue hoodie, hood pulled up and a duffle bag over his shoulder. He smiles when he spots Chad, and shakes his head at something Jason says as they near.
"Later, Carl," Chad says and hangs up without warning.
The first thing Jensen says is, "You know, nothing says you care like sending your personal assistant. No offense, Jason."
"None taken."
Chad says, "What, Jason gives great hugs," and turning to Jason, asks, "You didn't show him love?"
Jason opens his arms. Jensen snorts.
"What? You said discreet."
Chad makes Jason walk between them.
;;
He lasts until they get to the parking garage. They're hidden in the corner where the car is, standing at the rear. Jensen loads his bag, and Chad stops him before he closes the trunk.
He says, "Dude, God is still watching, but Jason will gladly turn his head."
Jensen smirks, looking over to where Jason's leaning on the railing. He's squinting into the sunlight, away from them.
Chad waits a few short seconds and then makes Jensen's decision for him, saying, "Jensen, fuck. I've earned it."
Jensen tastes vaguely sweet, like maybe he'd been sucking on candies the whole flight. Chad touches his hip, tucks his hand underneath the hoodie just enough to feel smooth line of skin. Jensen pulls closer, pushing Chad's hat back and out of the way, soft mouth and rough hands, and Chad wants. He always wants it so much.
;;
"How long has it been?" Jared says, crumbling up his napkin and dropping it on his plate.
Jensen looks at Chad and makes a face. "Maybe, five months?"
"Five months," Chad says, nodding. "Yeah, that first lunch was in June, July."
"Fucking lunch," Jared says, disbelieving. "And you just -- hooked up?"
Jensen finished off his lemonade, slurping through a straw. He sets down his glass and says, "He slipped me a note."
Jared stands up and walks out of the restaurant, Chad cracking up as he goes.
;;
And yet another follow-up: Third Verse, Same as the First.