I'm Not Okay
Title: I'm Not Okay
Pairing: George/Alex
Word Count: 613
Rating: PG-13
Status: Complete
Notes: Response to the word prompt ("Clock").
Summary: Alex can finally admit to himself and to George that something's wrong.
I'M BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PLEASE REVIEW!
Seattle
The room was silent, the only sounds coming from the dripping faucet and Alex's shallow breathing. Tired eyes stared at mangled arms, arms damaged by his own accord. He'd done this. He'd taken the blade and he'd...he'd almost done it. Somewhere in the background, Alex heard the door open and George drop his stuff onto the couch, but it felt like it was a world away.
“Alex?”
Don't come in here, Alex silently begged. He didn't want George to see this. He was a mess, his arms covered in blood and his face covered in unwilling tears, not something he'd want George to see in a million years.
“Alex?”
George knew. He knew about this and he'd tried to help, but Alex had always pushed him away. He didn't want help, he didn't need it. He could stop on his own.
“Alex?”
Worry was beginning to lace George's voice and Alex could hear it clear as day. It was the same tone George had had when he'd walked in on Alex changing a month after they'd gotten together and had discovered his secret. He'd tried to help then, too, but Alex had tossed on a long sleeve shirt and told him to shut up.
“Alex?”
Panic. Alex knew George was going to find him soon, whether it was from process of elimination or the scent of blood that was assaulting his nostrils. It was stronger than Sloan's cologne, or maybe it was his mind playing tricks on him.
“Alex?”
His eyes fell on his arms again. Blood covered them and he could only barely see the cuts beneath the red. Thin, long, and crisscrossing. He'd really done a number this time. He'd started with no real intention to stop, the only thought in his mind being him and the blade in his hand. It had fallen from his hands when the world started spinning and Alex just couldn't find the strength to lift it back up again.
“Alex?”
Some cuts were still leaking blood and Alex began to feel nauseous. He'd really screwed up this time. Before he could stop them, tears began to form behind his eyes again and he could feel his lashes grow moist each time he blinked.
“Alex?”
George pushed the door open and from the corner of his eye, Alex could see him take a reflexive step back before he rushed forward and fell to his knees beside his boyfriend. Alex could hear him, could recognize the panic in his voice as he tried to get Alex to focus on him, but he couldn't. He didn't have the energy to lift his head, so when George did it for him, a tear finally dripped off his lashes and onto George's hand.
“Alex.”
“I need your help.”
It was only said in a whisper, but George didn't ask twice, wrapping an arm around Alex and pulling him to his chest as his free hand grabbed for the washcloth that was lying in the sink. He silently cleaned off Alex's arms as the brunette in his arms began to cry again.
Before now, Alex never would have cried in front of anyone. He hadn't since his father broke his arm when he was five. Crying had always prompted his father, so Alex had just stopped doing it. Until today. He hadn't been able to help it. He'd started and he hadn't been able to stop. And now, as his shoulders shook and sobs escaped, Alex could just hear George whispering in his ear that it was going to be okay, that he was there.
Behind them, the clock ticked. One second down, a lifetime to go.
The End
Pairing: George/Alex
Word Count: 613
Rating: PG-13
Status: Complete
Notes: Response to the word prompt ("Clock").
Summary: Alex can finally admit to himself and to George that something's wrong.
I'M BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
PLEASE REVIEW!
Seattle
The room was silent, the only sounds coming from the dripping faucet and Alex's shallow breathing. Tired eyes stared at mangled arms, arms damaged by his own accord. He'd done this. He'd taken the blade and he'd...he'd almost done it. Somewhere in the background, Alex heard the door open and George drop his stuff onto the couch, but it felt like it was a world away.
“Alex?”
Don't come in here, Alex silently begged. He didn't want George to see this. He was a mess, his arms covered in blood and his face covered in unwilling tears, not something he'd want George to see in a million years.
“Alex?”
George knew. He knew about this and he'd tried to help, but Alex had always pushed him away. He didn't want help, he didn't need it. He could stop on his own.
“Alex?”
Worry was beginning to lace George's voice and Alex could hear it clear as day. It was the same tone George had had when he'd walked in on Alex changing a month after they'd gotten together and had discovered his secret. He'd tried to help then, too, but Alex had tossed on a long sleeve shirt and told him to shut up.
“Alex?”
Panic. Alex knew George was going to find him soon, whether it was from process of elimination or the scent of blood that was assaulting his nostrils. It was stronger than Sloan's cologne, or maybe it was his mind playing tricks on him.
“Alex?”
His eyes fell on his arms again. Blood covered them and he could only barely see the cuts beneath the red. Thin, long, and crisscrossing. He'd really done a number this time. He'd started with no real intention to stop, the only thought in his mind being him and the blade in his hand. It had fallen from his hands when the world started spinning and Alex just couldn't find the strength to lift it back up again.
“Alex?”
Some cuts were still leaking blood and Alex began to feel nauseous. He'd really screwed up this time. Before he could stop them, tears began to form behind his eyes again and he could feel his lashes grow moist each time he blinked.
“Alex?”
George pushed the door open and from the corner of his eye, Alex could see him take a reflexive step back before he rushed forward and fell to his knees beside his boyfriend. Alex could hear him, could recognize the panic in his voice as he tried to get Alex to focus on him, but he couldn't. He didn't have the energy to lift his head, so when George did it for him, a tear finally dripped off his lashes and onto George's hand.
“Alex.”
“I need your help.”
It was only said in a whisper, but George didn't ask twice, wrapping an arm around Alex and pulling him to his chest as his free hand grabbed for the washcloth that was lying in the sink. He silently cleaned off Alex's arms as the brunette in his arms began to cry again.
Before now, Alex never would have cried in front of anyone. He hadn't since his father broke his arm when he was five. Crying had always prompted his father, so Alex had just stopped doing it. Until today. He hadn't been able to help it. He'd started and he hadn't been able to stop. And now, as his shoulders shook and sobs escaped, Alex could just hear George whispering in his ear that it was going to be okay, that he was there.
Behind them, the clock ticked. One second down, a lifetime to go.
The End