after pt 1
Title: after part 1/4
Verse: musical, also i am of the school of thought that in the musicverse Fiyero is right about thinking the idea that water can harm Elphaba is mostly propoganda and thus a few tears are not only necessary but harmless.
Pairing: Gelphie (with a bit of Elphaba/Fiyero)
Rating: PG-13
Notes: i don't own any of these characters they belong to folks far luckier than me. this is my first gelphie fic so feedback and comments are greatly appreciated but be gentle, i'm delicate ;).
“Fiyero you aren’t listening to me,” Elphaba was frustrated at having this same fight again and it showed in the sharp edge of her tone.
“Look, I know you miss her but it’s not safe, for her or for you to go back to the Emerald City,” Fiyero’s expression portrayed as much concern as was possible with his painted on features, “We need to stop having this conversation.” His tone softened as he finished, he knew better than anyone how much Elphaba missed Glinda. He had watched the tears the green woman had tried to hide, he had heard her talk in her sleep and, all rumors to the contrary, he was not a stupid man.
He loved Elphaba intensely and he knew that she loved him too, but he also knew that what they shared was always over-shadowed by the mysterious bond that existed between the green woman and the perky blond. They were perfect opposites that together were made far better by the existence of the other, darkness and light, anger and joy and together they were amazing. He had seen it more clearly than either of them ever had. And it was only proven every couple of months when Elphaba would come up with some new way to sneak back into the Emerald City and back to the palace and back to Glinda.
“I can’t stop having this conversation,” Elphaba threw back at him; “she’s….” the words were bitten off through clenched teeth. She didn’t want to say the rest of the sentence out loud as though speaking it would make it happen. She also knew that talking about leaving again would hurt Fiyero and she couldn’t do that to him, she had done so much of that already. She would never be able to make up for what she had done to so many people. She had never wanted to hurt anyone, least of all those she loved and yet somehow she had hurt all of them.
There had been no choice for herself or Fiyero, they had to escape. The idea of the Wicked Witch of the West had long ago taken on a life of its own. It had nothing to do with her, with Elphaba, it was bigger than she was and if she had stayed it would have crushed her and anyone near her. She had made Glinda promise not to clear her name; she couldn’t allow the other woman to be caught up in the whirlwind and witch hunts that would assuredly follow in the wake of her death. If there was one thing she could do it would be to keep one person from being destroyed by Elphaba’s own good intentions. Elphaba had long since forced herself not to examine too deeply why that person had been Glinda.
“What is it, what has changed this time?” Fiyero’s words cut into her thoughts drawing her back to the conversation at hand. “I know it’s always about her, there’s always an excuse,” he knew his jealousy was coloring his words he was only human after all. He had long ago accepted that he would always be second in Elphaba’s heart but that didn’t make it easy.
Fire flashed in dark eyes at Fiyero’s words, a moment of anger, of protectiveness, that was quickly doused by guilt. She didn’t understand what she was feeling; she didn’t know why she couldn’t just be happy with the rather quiet life she and Fiyero had built. There were so many old aches in her heart, regrets and could have beens and what ifs, it wasn’t as though this one should weigh so much more heavily, but it did. And the news that Chistery had sent had somehow changed everything. Elphaba knew it was both foolish and dangerous to stay in touch with the flying monkey, but she couldn’t help herself she knew he looked in on Glinda from time to time and she needed to know Glinda was alright.
“Fiyero, she’s…she’s getting married,” the words were choked through tear constricted vocal cords.
He knew those words did, in fact, change everything. Looking in those dark eyes he knew so well there was no question any more. He could feel the first true pain he had felt since his transformation, the pain of his heart finally breaking. He had always told himself he would be happy for the time he had been given with this fascinating, brilliant, beautiful green girl, but he now knew that feeling would be a time in coming. There would be pain and heartache and loss to get through before he could again cherish all he had been given. There was no choice but to let her go, he loved her too much to do anything else, but he wasn’t going to push her out the door, he couldn’t, not yet. “What are you going to do?”
“Oh, Fiyero,” any further words were cut off by the look in his eyes; she didn’t think his scarecrow visage could possibly hold that much hurt. It was out there now even she couldn’t keep denying what it was. She loved Glinda the Good, no she loved Glinda and had even, for reasons far beyond her understanding, loved Galinda the silly, vain, ditzy blond she had been forced to room with at Shiz. “What have I done?” The question sounded so desperate and plaintive even to her ears.
Fiyero reached out to take her hands in his; they trembled slightly as he grasped them. “My love, you have only ever done what you thought was best for those you love, me included,” a small self-deprecating laugh escaped him, “I’ve always known, always, since that first time I saw you Galindafied in class, really since I saw the two of you dance together at the Oz Dust. I have played second fiddle to that, but don’t think I didn’t know what I was doing. Though there are many reports to the contrary I’m not an idiot.”
“I know, you are the wisest man I’ve ever known,” she meant it with all her heart her love for him was real, she knew it had always been this way. And in this moment she had no idea what she had done to deserve the love of this man. He had saved her life in so many ways, and on so many occasions she knew there was no way to repay him, “how can I-.”
He cut off her words by placing his fingers to her lips, “Don’t thank me, or make me out to be nobler than I am, if I thought it was within my power to stop you I would. I still think this is incredibly dangerous, and perhaps even foolhardy, but I know you. There is perhaps only one person in the world who knows you better and your heart has always led you. You may be more well-known for your intellect and power but we both know what fuels those.” His fingers dropped from her lips allowing her to speak again.
“How do I do this Fiyero, how? I don’t want to hurt you; it kills me to think of it. How do I go to her after all this time?” Suddenly the reality of this was baring itself to her. She was considering returning to a land that had celebrated her death for weeks, where she was now a morality tale to scare small children into behaving. Not only was she returning to Oz she was going to attempt to break into the palace and steal the heart of Glinda the Good, ruler of Oz.
“You’ve already worked out the plan. I know you. You wouldn’t have brought it up again if you hadn’t already gone over contingencies and eventualities. You know you have the power to return undetected. Just because you haven’t used it since we left doesn’t mean the power has left you.”
“I thought you always told me there was no way I could do it safely,” she gently reminded him.
“I told you I’m not entirely noble, I didn’t want you to leave me,” his honesty only made her ache for him more but she also knew that ache of regret she felt was outweighed by the deeper ache she felt at having lost Glinda when she escaped Oz.
“I haven’t used that power since, it only ever resulted in pain and loss,” her voice was once again strained with unshed tears and old regrets, “damn it!” She began to pace with unspent emotion.
“It saved my life,” the softness of Fiyero’s voice as he said these words stopped her in a way no shouting could have, “and now you should use it this once to save your own.”
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