Somewhere In Between, 1/2, PG, by elphie_tlg
Title: Somewhere In Between
Author: elphie_tlg
Rating: PG
Verse: Combination of book and musical
Disclaimer: I don't own Wicked...that belongs to Gregory Maguire...
Summary: Elphaba and Galinda explore the differences between want, need, and desire. A conversation that leads them to things they never thought possible.
Well hello everyone! I was struck by inspriation again, but I come with not a one-shot...but a two part story this time!! Yeah!!! So read on and tell me what you think! I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!
Somewhere In Between-
-A Tale in Two: Part One
Elphaba walked through the courtyard, clinging tightly to her jacket. The early winter weather was brutal, and dark clouds could be seen in the distance, slowly making their way towards Shiz. The wind picked up and she shifted awkwardly, trying to balance her focus between holding onto her books and keeping her coat secure. She turned a corner, sharply, trying to stick close to the building walls, and ran right into another student.
“Oh, my apologies Miss Elphaba,” the boy said, grabbing hold of Elphaba’s shoulders to steady her. He nodded to her and left.
Elphaba turned and watched the boy walk away. It was odd really, how people were treating her now, ever since that night at the OzDust. They weren’t exactly friendly, but it wasn’t hostile either. She got the occasional ‘Hi’ and if the world was really off, sometimes boys held the door open for her to allow her to pass first. She wasn’t exactly used to the treatment, and to say the least, it was disconcerting. But in a good way. A very good way. And all because of Galinda.
A small smile spread across Elphaba’s features at the thought of the blonde. How Galinda had so effortlessly changed Elphaba’s life in such a short amount of time, she would never know. And she it didn’t really matter to her either. All that mattered was that it had happened. And in her own way Elphaba was grateful.
Turning another corner Elphaba stopped dead in her tracks to prevent herself from running into two people, seemingly joined at the lips. She immediately recognized the bigger of the two, Avaric, the good for nothing, pig-headed jack ass, whom Elphaba made a point to ignore. Even though Avaric had his companion pressed against the wall it was quite obvious that she was a petite blonde, with flowing golden curls. The girl had her hands placed squarely on Avaric’s shoulders, keeping the kiss from becoming anything more than chaste and innocent. Elphaba wrinkled her nose in disgust.
Any public display of affection, even as naïve as this one, was to be kept behind closed doors in Elphaba’s mind. It was not the publics business, especially hers, when it came to what couples liked to do and she wished for them to keep it that way.
With a roll of the eyes, Elphaba continued on her way, trying to ignore the lovely couple. Just as Elphaba turned around one last corner the couple must have broken, the girl letting out a light giggle that made Elphaba freeze in her tracks.
She knew that laugh better then her own. It was what she heard every day, morning, noon, and night. And though she knew she would never admit it out loud, the sound was music to her ears. In its own way, the day didn’t seem quite right without it.
Quietly, Elphaba snuck back the way she had come from and looked around the corner, keeping her entire body, save for her nose and up, out of site.
Sure enough, standing in front of Avaric, between him and the wall was Galinda. Her friend, her roommate, her Galinda. Elphaba felt her blood boil, her fists and jaw clenching at the thought of what Galinda had just been doing. Never in her life had Elphaba felt anger like this, but she was immediately able to recognize what it was. Having seen it more time than she cared to in her life, it was hard to misname. It was jealousy.
Obviously, she and Galinda weren’t an ‘item’ nor had Elphaba ever told Galinda of the feelings that had sprung up in her green heart. Nor did she ever plan on saying so; Galinda was her roommate and only friend. She wasn’t stupid enough to ruin that. It was a whole lot of wrong that she didn’t plan on making known. But that didn’t quell the ache she suddenly felt.
Galinda giggled once again as Avaric took her hand and kissed it before walking away. Both Elphaba and Galinda watched as the boy disappeared. As Galinda righted herself and picked up her school bag, that had fallen off her shoulder, Elphaba disappeared around the corner, before her friend could see her and made her way towards their shared dorm; now a blurry of green envy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Elphaba couldn’t believe how deeply she had been hurt by seeing Avaric and Galinda share a kiss. She supposed it was a mix of things really. She hated Avaric, as far as she knew Galinda had no feelings of the romantic kind for the man, and there was the fact she, herself, had feelings for the blonde. Before the event minutes ago, Elphaba had thought it had only been a simple crush that would pass in time, but witnessing her own reaction, she some how wondered if her feelings for the blonde were strengthening with every passing tick of the clock.
She felt sad, angry, but above all hurt. Elphaba was sure that if she allowed herself to cry, she would right now. This was the exact reason why she never got close to people, both in a friendly or romantic way. She was the one who always ended up being hurt, whether it was intentional or not. She didn’t blame Galinda in any way, she never would. She blames herself completely; it was her own damn fault.
Elphaba was sitting on her bed, having just opened a book to try and calm down, when Galinda came gallivanting into the room. “Hello Elphie!” she said, happily throwing her bad at the foot of her bed and sitting down on the pink frills she called a comforter.
Elphaba nodded in response, not looking up from the book, but not being able to make anything of the writing before her. At the moment, with the torment of emotions she was suddenly experiencing, Elphaba didn’t trust her own voice. Is this what limbo felt like?
“Elphie, are you alright?” Galinda asked, her brow furrowing at the odd behavior of her roommate.
“Peachy,” Elphaba replied dryly, her throat dry.
“Are you sure? You look angry,” the blonde replied, standing and walking over to Elphaba’s bed and sitting next to the green girl.
Elphaba shrugged, shooting a quick glance at her friend. The look of complete concern that covered Galinda’s face nearly made Elphaba tell her what was bothering her, but she bit the inside of her cheeks to prevent herself from doing so. “I’m fine, Galinda, really.”
Galinda looked at her friend narrowly. “I still think you’re lying.” Elphaba rose her eyebrows at the girl, “But if you don’t want to talk about it, then I won’t press the matter.” Elphaba let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding. “But if you ever want to talk, Elphie, I’m always here.” She finished, taking hold of one of Elphaba’s hands in her own, giving it a light squeeze.
Elphaba felt her stomach flip at the contact and watched dazedly as Galinda stood and walked to her small vanity and began the task of brushing her hair. Elphaba stared, an internal debate taking place within her. She didn’t want Galinda to know what she had just witnessed in fear that Galinda would guess why she was so disturbed by the fact; but at the same time she was curious. Galinda had never before told Elphaba that she had feelings for the pig-headed Avaric, so why was she so carelessly kissing him, albeit chastely, in public? It made no sense to Elphaba’s more than logical way of thinking.
In the end curiosity won out and Elphaba spoke, choosing her words carefully. “I didn’t know you had feelings for Avaric, Galinda,” she said, eyeing the back of Galinda’s head.
Galinda looked at Elphaba through the mirror, not stopping in her repetitive task. “I don’t have feelings for him, Elphie, you know that,” she said, a small blush creeping upon her cheeks, knowing that she had most like been caught. “Why do you ask, anyways?”
“I saw you,” Elphaba said bluntly. Galinda’s blush deepened. “If you don’t have feelings for him, then why were you kissing him?” she asked, her own purple blush spreading across her cheeks. She suddenly felt guilty for what she had seen and for questioning Galinda about it, when it was none of her business.
Galinda shrugged and continued brushing her hair. “He wanted a kiss and I felt like it, so I let him.”
Elphaba looked at her quizzically, “You felt like it so you let him? That’s hardly proper Galinda.”
“I don’t see what the problem is Elphie, it was just a simple kiss. No harm done.”
“No harm done? Galinda, its things like this that start petty rumors. Word could get around that your easy or something. Or this kiss could suddenly turn into much more.”
Galinda gasped, turned in her seat and threw her brush at Elphaba, the item landing at the lanky girl’s feet. “Elphaba Thropp! The mere thought of that statement is almost as scandalicious as the act itself!”
Elphaba huffed. “Well, it’s true!”
Galinda’s face saddened. “Elphie you know I’m not like that.”
Elphaba sighed, picked up Galinda’s brush and stood, walking to stand behind her petite friend. “I know, Galinda,” she said, setting the brush on the vanity and placing her hand on Galinda’s shoulder. “But I don’t want to see you get hurt, because you decided to throw a kiss away. People are ruthless, I should know,” Elphaba smiled and Galinda laughed quietly. “They’ll turn a simple kiss into much more just to create a good story for their own gossip.”
Galinda smiled and placed her hand atop Elphaba’s, locking her eyes with the brown ones she saw in the mirror. Elphaba felt her breath quicken. “Thank you Elphie and I’m glad you care,” Elphaba’s ears turned purple as she blushed. “But I’ll be alright. It’s one of the nice things about being high on the Shiz Popularity Latter, no one will dare start a scandilicious rumor about me,” she said, seriously, her smile hinting that she was joking. Elphaba rolled her eyes, hit Galinda’s shoulder playfully and returned to her bed, sitting on its edge.
“Not that I really care about Avaric’s feelings, he can go jump in suicide lake for all I care,” Galinda snorted at Elphaba’s comment making the green girl cackle. Galinda blushed. “But what if he thinks that kiss was sincere and now you’re leading him on?”
Galinda smiled. “Why Miss Elphaba, are you sure you don’t have like Avaric?” she asked cheekily.
Elphaba made a gagging sound. “Hardly. But you still didn’t need to do it.”
“You’re right, I didn’t need to, but I wanted to.”
Elphaba cocked her head. “Is there a difference?” Elphaba asked, mocking Galinda.
Galinda once again threw her brush at Elphaba, hitting the girl square in the stomach. “Ow! Must you throw something so hard? Why not a pillow?” Elphaba asked, throwing the brush back.
Galinda caught the item with an ease that surprised both girls. “It’s not my fault you chose to mock me when I was brushing my hair,” she said returning to the task. “But back to the matter at hand, yes there is a difference.”
Elphaba leaned back on her bed, resting her weight on her elbows. “Do enlighten me,” she said, very much interested in Galinda’s way of thinking.
Galinda paused, touching the tip of the brush to her chin in thought. “Well, for example, when I was little and I would try and sneak cookies before dinner my mother would always say to me ‘Before you eat that cookie, Galinda, I want you to ask yourself, ‘Do I really need this cookie?’’ Well, I would. Before I always ate a cookie I would ask myself. ‘Do I really need this cookie?’ and the answer always be ‘No, I don’t.’
“But then I would ask myself. “Do I want this cookie, and the answer would be “Yes.” So, I would eat the cookie.”
By the time Galinda was done with her explanation, Elphaba was biting her lip to keep from laughing, her sides aching. The mental imagine of an even more pint-size Galinda popped into her mind, short blonde curls bouncing on her shoulders as she built some sort of contraption to reach the cookie jar that was slightly out of her reach.
“Galinda, that has to be the most interesting analogy I’ve ever heard.”
“By interesting I suppose you mean silly.”
Elphaba finally allowed her laughter to fill the room. Galinda rolled her eyes and continued to brush her hair. “Silly or not, it’s the perfect example. Want is something you wish to have; Need is something you have to have.”
“Now why didn’t you just say that in the first place?” Elphaba asked her laughs slowly calming.
“Perhaps I thought your one-track brain wouldn’t be able to handle such a simple explanation.”
“Miss Galinda, your words! How they wound me,” Elphaba cackled. Galinda once again threw her brush at Elphaba, finally making her mark and hitting the lanky girl in the head.
Elphaba continued to chuckle as she lightly tossed the brush back to Galinda. “But still, don’t they both stem from the same thing? And if so, doesn’t that mean that they are one in the same?”
“Not necessarily,” Galinda countered, once again brushing her hair. Elphaba was amazed at how the girl could do such a thing for so long. “If you’re going to use that argument, you need merely look at religion. Different religions start at the same source, yet they end differently and believe different things. Just because the origin is the same, that doesn’t mean the result is.”
Elphaba slowly sat up, she had never heard her roommate speak so thoughtfully before, and she blushed to think that it made her desire for the blonde beauty grow even more.
“Be that as it may, religions stem from a historical source. We’re talking about feelings here. How can two reactions stem from one feeling?”
“And what feeling might that be, oh wise one?”
Elphaba smirked. “Desire.”
Galinda turned in her chair once again, “Well, there’s your problem, Elphie.”
“What?”
“Desire isn’t the source of want and need, it’s the result when they are combined. It’s, you know, somewhere in between,” she stated, obviously. “For someone who’s so smart with equations, I don’t understand how you could go wrong with this one,” Galinda finished absentmindedly, turning to continue brushing her hair.
“And when, pray tell, do they combine to make desire?”
“Well, that’s obvious. That happens when love happens.”
Elphaba gawked, “So you’re saying that need and want are two different entities until someone is in love. At which point they combine to form desire?”
“Precisely!” Galinda said excitedly. “When one desires another they both need and want them at the same time.”
“But if they are combined, doesn’t that mean that one is the other? There for making them the same exact thing, as I said to begin with?” Elphaba asked, proud for the fact in twisting Galinda’s own words around.
“No,” Galinda replied simply, “Besides, you said that they are the same thing through and through. I still say that they are different to begin with. Which, might I add, they are. Point, Game, and Match.” Galinda said, once again looking at Elphaba through the mirror. “Or is it Check Mate?”
Elphaba rolled her eyes but laughed nonetheless. “I don’t think I’ll ever understand you’re logic here, Galinda, but I don’t think I will ever need to when it comes to this matter,” she said, lying on her back and staring at the ceiling, trying to rework her way through the conversation they just had.
“What do you mean?”
Elphaba didn’t move from her new position, but shrugged. “Well, I just don’t think that I will have to worry myself with the feelings we’re talking about because I’ll never be able to experience it with another,” she said, immediately regretting the words once they left her lips.
Galinda gasped. “Why do you say that, Elphie?”
“Well, I suppose, no one will ever want, or need or desire, or what ever the hell you want to call it, me.”
“I’m sure there’s someone out there who does,” Galinda said nearly whispered.
“Oh sure, I might receive the occasional kiss due to a dare or wager some boy makes with his friends. I mean, I’m green, after all. But for someone to actually like the idea of kissing me or truly having feelings for me? Who in their right mind would? ,” she said, holding her own verdigris hand in front of her to stare at its odd coloring.
“I would, Elphie, and I do,” Galinda said even more quietly, but Elphaba heard her nonetheless.
Both girls gasped and before Elphaba could sit up on her bed, Galinda muttered “I have to go,” and fled from the room, a blur of red embarrassment, the door staying open in her wake.
Elphaba’s mind buzzed, staring at the open door. “Galinda,” she said, her action of stopping the girl from leaving more than delayed. Without another thought Elphaba ran from the room.
Author's Note: Well, there's part one! Part two will be up within in the next couple of days! Let me know what you think...until then!!!