FanFic100: #017 Brown
Title: Potato, potahto
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Characters: Cadman/Lorne
Prompt: #017 Brown
Word Count: 2.973
Rating: K+
Summary: Dusty Mehra knows one thing for sure: It never gets boring on Major Lorne's team.
Author's Notes: So, remember the "Strange Bedfellows"-verse from "I hate you" and "True anarchists"? This is a prequel to it (and I'm sure sgteam14283 will like it since she expressed the wish to read about a certain mission mentioned in "Purple") and I hope you like it. mackenziesmomma assured me that it was fine but I'm a little doubtful because the whole story feels a little... off. What do you think?
Also, this is the fault of my friend koboldmaki who gave me the prompt "You can never have too many cormorans." ages ago and I was resolved to write her a story for it.
And here's the LDT.
Potato, potahto
“You say either and I say either, You say neither and I say neither
Either, either Neither, neither, Let's call the whole thing off.
You like potato and I like potahto, You like tomato and I like tomahto
Potato, potahto, Tomato, tomahto, Let's call the whole thing off.”
Ella Fitzgerald & Louis Armstrong, “Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off”
Well, there’s one thing that really can be said about being on Major Lorne’s team: It certainly never gets boring. Just today for example… the mission was supposed to be an easy meet and greet with the locals of M4E-whatever but it started off very… interesting.
Dr. Marinus van de Groeten, their Dutch anthropologist, was pulled off the mission practically in the last minute because his blood test results obviously looked funky or something and they were left with no one for replacement. Until Colonel Sheppard had come up with a very bold choice. After throwing a look around the Gate room he’d simply shrugged and drawled “Just take Rodney,” and for him that had settled the matter.
Major Lorne and Lieutenant Cadman hadn’t been that enthusiastic about this suggestion but Dr. McKay had certainly taken the cake with his reaction. At first he’d pretended he hadn’t heard it, then his jaw had… dropped and in the end he had simply been able to choke out, “Seriously?”
At that point both Lorne and Cadman had had quite a hard time keeping from snorting and laughing - she would have had, too, but she had a reputation to uphold - and Sheppard had obviously been in a cruel mood because he had grinned and said, “No, I was joking.” In the dramatic pause, McKay had immediately looked relieved only to be kind of crushed when the Colonel had added, “Yes, of course seriously.” At that McKay had uttered an insult worthy of her drill instructors at boot camp but Sheppard had shown McKay who was the boss in times when Mr. Woolsey was in the city, given him a stern look and said, “Lorne, Cadman and Mehra are one scientist short, the mission is scheduled, you are available, you’ll be fine. Now stop whining and get the hell geared up.”
She had fully expected McKay to throw a tantrum at that but astoundingly he had gritted his teeth, gotten his act together and trudged through the ‘gate along side them. On the way to the settlement Lorne and Cadman had shown why soldiers and scientists alike feared them when they were together and had given McKay a tough time. Certainly deserved but she was still surprised at how well he had been able to hold his own against them… something even she sometimes had difficulties with.
This time, however, she had taken care to stay out of it most of the time, instead opting for listening and observing and gathering evidence for backing up the bet she placed in the pool regarding the question of how long it will take Lorne and Cadman to hop into bed with each other. Most of the other Marines put their money on something between two weeks and three months but she opted for at least a year, maybe never; wondering time and again what made the rest misjudge both officers’ brains so gravely. They’re just too smart to risk their careers for something like that.
Anyway, in the end they had arrived at the settlement… which was when the real fun began. Usually, van der Groeten handled all the greetings and introductions and that had indeed saved their butts more often than they all liked to admit. Since he’d been incapacitated for this mission, they had agreed on Lorne handling all the formal stuff but unfortunately… the woman in the lead had addressed Cadman immediately. She’s still not quite sure if she really heard McKay mumble “Not another Amazon tribe,” at seeing that their welcome party had consisted nearly completely of women of all ages; half of them dressed as warriors and the other half in very formal civilian attire.
Then, a little flustered Cadman had tried to indicate that Major Lorne was the one in charge not her, frantically pointing to him and trying to make his status clear to the villagers. That had been necessary because of course of all the off-world teams theirs was always the only one getting missions to those few tribes who do not understand English or just any other Earth language. At first the leading woman had looked like she had understood, turned to Major Lorne and… given him a very thorough sizing up.
That had caused Cadman to mumble a little disturbed, “Uh… I have the feeling that she’s taking a rather strange interest in you, sir.”
Lorne had wanted to answer something but had hesitated because the woman had started to circle him and that had seemed to be just a little distracting. So instead McKay had seized his opportunity to get a stab at Cadman and had replied, “Gee, jealous much, Lieutenant?” The only reason she had been able to hold back a snort or even a grin at that had been the look of scathing evil Cadman had sent McKay over the village woman’s shoulder. Not even she is brave - or stupid - enough to get on Cadman’s bad side when she’s wearing that look.
After that things had kinda deteriorated because instead of starting to talk to Lorne… the woman had beamed at Cadman, bumped her fist against the Lieutenant’s one and had motioned for Lorne to follow her in a rather demanding way. That had been the moment where it had dawned on all of them what exactly had just happened and she had taken it upon herself to be the one actually saying it out loud, “Uh… not to be a prophet of doom or something, ma’am, but… I think you just sold our CO.”
Everyone had turned around first to her, a little flabbergasted at her blunt summary of the situation and then Cadman had turned around to the woman again, almost frantically trying to tell her that this was all a mistake and that Major Lorne was most certainly not for sale. Lorne for his part had wisely stayed out of this, having realized pretty fast that ‘wares’ don’t talk. That hadn't kept him from throwing Cadman some pretty dark looks, though.
Since she knew Cadman would tell her if she needed her help, she stayed out of it as well, not fully able to hold back a smirk now and then… and then suddenly she had looked at McKay and had seen the same smirk mirrored on his face. That had surprised both of them enough that they had avoided looking at each other altogether for the rest of the exchange.
In the end, Cadman hadn't been able to make it clear to them Atlantis usually did not sell their men in exchange for whatever their trading partners had to offer but she could work out a deal to buy Major Lorne back. Apparently, the village had planned a feast and had been short on hunters and the women had recognized their P90s for their worth in slaughtering animals. So they had come to the agreement that they would get the locals what they needed for their feast and they in turn had - hopefully - agreed to let the Major go.
Which is why they are now wading through knee-deep mud. In front of her Cadman follows their guide with a stoic determination on her face that she always has when she sets her mind to something. Behind her is McKay, now and then muttering about the space mosquitoes that keep soaring around them even despite the nearly freezing temperatures that will surely eat them up or do something worse like turn them into zombies or something.
She’s just a little tempted to turn around, shove her P90 into his face and make him shut the hell up - she has this feeling that it wouldn’t even get her in trouble with either Lieutenant Cadman or Major Lorne - but just in that moment, their guide rises her hand and motions them to crouch down and be quiet. Just great. Now not only their feet and calves are immersed in mud but their legs on the whole and even parts of their lower body. It doesn’t help that the mud is only slightly warmer than the air.
With her hand the guide gestures shortly towards a group of creatures that look like black birds with long beaks - possibly cormorans, her bird-watching crazy uncle would have said - that are visible through the waving branches of reed. Uh-huh. Obviously they’re supposed to get some of those beasts for the feast. Judging by the fingers the guide holds up… ten?
At that, she exchanges a look with Cadman and they both grimace. Argh. McKay must have seen this and promptly comments in a not exactly quiet voice, “What, are you two super soldiers out of ideas already?”
This time, the scathing look comes from both of them but McKay doesn’t do them the favor of budging. Huh. It’s Cadman who answers him in the end, keeping her voice as low as possible but not able to keep the impatient edge out of it, “This is sharpshooter work, Rodney. And as you might have noticed, the P90 is not what I’d call a sharpshooter’s dream.”
“Aren’t bombs more of your specialty, anyway?” McKay replies, with that sneer on his face ignoring all three of them - Cadman, herself and their guide - glaring at him because he just won’t lower his voice.
But instead of giving something equally sarcastic back, Cadman’s face suddenly lights up… and she gets that slightly maniacal glint in her eyes that indicates imminent use of C4. Oh goody, she thinks kind of pleased; at least she gets to watch something nice today. “That’s it, Rodney. You’re a genius!”
A little taken aback, McKay stutters, “I am?” before realizing what he just said and adding a little indignantly, “Of course I am. That’s why Sheppard sent me along with you.” No… not exactly, she’s about to say but a warning glance from Cadman keeps her from doing it. Cadman has some idea involving a little detonating and is itching to try it out. Somehow… she’s glad Major Lorne isn't here because if there’s one thing he still isn't quite comfortable with after three months of having Cadman on his team it’s her explosion-happiness.
For example, it’s powerful enough to keep her even focused enough to ignore McKay being a pompous ass - although… that little hesitation and moment of insecurity somehow told her it’s probably all just for show and that surprises her - and simply says, “Get over yourself, McKay. I want to do this dynamite fishing style and I need someone to check my calculations. Think you can do that?”
That was probably the wrong thing to say because suddenly McKay puffs up like an enormous bird. Actually… it looks quite cute… and that thought kind of scares her so she banishes it very fast. “Listen, Cadman, this brain has saved countless of planets. The thought that I should use it to check your meager little…”
“It also destroyed at least one solar system,” Cadman dead-pans and the way McKay stops mid-sentence to stare at her dumfounded at her sheer audacity to interrupt him seems to satisfy her profoundly. “Can we get to work now?” Seems like someone is really eager to bust a few birds… or is there more to it? After all, someone is depending on their success, waiting back in that village to give Cadman a piece or two about selling him. Could it be that Cadman… is a little anxious to keep Lorne’s disapproval down to a minimum?
And to be honest… she would like to get this over with as well so she simply says, “Of course, ma’am,” this time throwing McKay an evil glare herself. Thankfully, with that it seems to be settled, Cadman uses her hand and feet to explain to their slightly wary guide what they’re planning and then pulls out good old pen and paper. Working fast, she scratches a few figures on her notepad, erases some, scratches some new ones… and then hands them to McKay. She expects him to pull out one of those Ancient gadgets all the scientists usually carry around with them but after a short moment of automatically reaching for one of his vest’s pockets, he has obviously decided to rely on praised brain, corrects a few of Cadman’s figures and hands it back to her.
After that… it’s only a matter of timing and aiming grenades. The result is pretty enough that even Major Lorne would have been impressed and she regrets secretly not to have brought a camera because she’s sure that some pictures would seriously help in convincing him not to be pissed at Cadman because quite honestly… this mess was not really her fault. And for some reason she can’t stand Lorne and Cadman being pissed at each other, even if it is just one-sided… probably it’s because when they are getting at each others’ throats she always is afraid that her assessment was all wrong and she’ll lose the money in the betting pool against those who bet on them landing in bed in the next few weeks.
When the small bombing raid on the birds’ resting place is over, they have 13 dead or wounded birds to scoop up - she files this example of precision away in case she might need it to appease Lorne - and can finally make it back to the settlement.
It takes them another 30 minutes to get there but they’re worth the reception after their guide told them about their little foray into dynamite hunting with the appropriate great gestures and appreciative faces. Cadman obviously is the hero of the day and her mud-smeared face and the big grin in it seem to amuse Lorne enough that he momentarily forgets that he’s still technically a possession of the village matriarch.
The only one not quite happy is McKay, mumbling something about having been cheated out of his credit for this whole thing and she suddenly finds herself saying, “Don’t fret, Doc. You did pretty well and I’m sure the Lieutenant appreciates it as well.” Originally… she’d said it mostly to just shut him up but it had come out much nicer than she had intended it to and McKay’s face actually lights up in a smile.
“At least one person here recognizes my contribution. You surely are exceptionally bright for a grunt, Melder.” Yeah, great. That’s what you get for being nice. Not even bothering to correct him on her name she just rolls her eyes and turns towards the brightly lit house that seems to serve as a kind of town hall here. This is really the last time ever she was nice to Dr. McKay again, she decides and goes looking for her two superiors.
She finds them engrossed in talking at the table and wants to join them… but is stopped momentarily by Lorne reaching out and almost wiping a speck of dirt from Cadman’s cheeks before he seems to remember just who is sitting opposite him grinning and gesturing. Dammit, she has to do something about this or all her money will be down the drain in a few weeks time. Well, that and both Lorne’s and Cadman’s careers and she would really like to keep both of them as her commanding officers for a little while longer.
So she decides to go in full force, plunges herself on the bank opposite to them and says, “Dr. McKay’s being a prima donna again, sir. Just thought I should tell you.” Okay, that was not nice to McKay but he did bring this upon himself.
Cadman and Lorne seize their bantering and look at her… almost a little guiltily. Argh. But at least they know what they did wrong. And thankfully they’re both professionals enough that they can cover up this fast enough. Lorne doesn’t even need to clear his throat to switch almost effortlessly into CO mode again. “Remind me that we have to talk about your attitude towards high-ranking civilians again, Sergeant.”
She can’t help grinning at him and a short look towards Cadman tells her that the other Marine is as amused as she is. “Sure, sir.”
And since this is about McKay… that’s really all that has be said about this and Lorne changes the topic, “Anyway… what did we learn today, team?” Both Cadman and she know what he is referring to and he probably knows that he sure as hell won’t get them to say “Never let Sheppard send you on a meet-and-greet without giving you the proper anthropological briefings about the locals.”
And yeah, in the end it’s Cadman who answers, still grinning, “You can never have too many cormorans.”
Suppressing a snort she feels compelled to add quite straight-faced, “Or strange alien birds that look like cormorans, anyway.”
It makes Lorne roll his eyes but before he can give them a piece of his mind about this, McKay suddenly pipes up from behind her, “So… what’s for dinner? I’m starving.” At everyone turning towards him he just raises his hands and adds, “What? I just helped Cadman to blow up a whole colony of essentially defenseless and probably harmless alien birds. That was pretty strenuous.” Lorne and Cadman exchange a mutual eye-rolling but McKay ignores it and simply sits down beside her of all people. Oh well. Hopefully the birds are good enough to make up for this. And at least this whole ordeal confirmed her initial assessment: It really never gets boring on Major Lorne’s team… which is actually a very good thing.
~*~
TBC in I Hate You.
Fandom: Stargate Atlantis
Characters: Cadman/Lorne
Prompt: #017 Brown
Word Count: 2.973
Rating: K+
Summary: Dusty Mehra knows one thing for sure: It never gets boring on Major Lorne's team.
Author's Notes: So, remember the "Strange Bedfellows"-verse from "I hate you" and "True anarchists"? This is a prequel to it (and I'm sure sgteam14283 will like it since she expressed the wish to read about a certain mission mentioned in "Purple") and I hope you like it. mackenziesmomma assured me that it was fine but I'm a little doubtful because the whole story feels a little... off. What do you think?
Also, this is the fault of my friend koboldmaki who gave me the prompt "You can never have too many cormorans." ages ago and I was resolved to write her a story for it.
And here's the LDT.
Potato, potahto
“You say either and I say either, You say neither and I say neither
Either, either Neither, neither, Let's call the whole thing off.
You like potato and I like potahto, You like tomato and I like tomahto
Potato, potahto, Tomato, tomahto, Let's call the whole thing off.”
Ella Fitzgerald & Louis Armstrong, “Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off”
Well, there’s one thing that really can be said about being on Major Lorne’s team: It certainly never gets boring. Just today for example… the mission was supposed to be an easy meet and greet with the locals of M4E-whatever but it started off very… interesting.
Dr. Marinus van de Groeten, their Dutch anthropologist, was pulled off the mission practically in the last minute because his blood test results obviously looked funky or something and they were left with no one for replacement. Until Colonel Sheppard had come up with a very bold choice. After throwing a look around the Gate room he’d simply shrugged and drawled “Just take Rodney,” and for him that had settled the matter.
Major Lorne and Lieutenant Cadman hadn’t been that enthusiastic about this suggestion but Dr. McKay had certainly taken the cake with his reaction. At first he’d pretended he hadn’t heard it, then his jaw had… dropped and in the end he had simply been able to choke out, “Seriously?”
At that point both Lorne and Cadman had had quite a hard time keeping from snorting and laughing - she would have had, too, but she had a reputation to uphold - and Sheppard had obviously been in a cruel mood because he had grinned and said, “No, I was joking.” In the dramatic pause, McKay had immediately looked relieved only to be kind of crushed when the Colonel had added, “Yes, of course seriously.” At that McKay had uttered an insult worthy of her drill instructors at boot camp but Sheppard had shown McKay who was the boss in times when Mr. Woolsey was in the city, given him a stern look and said, “Lorne, Cadman and Mehra are one scientist short, the mission is scheduled, you are available, you’ll be fine. Now stop whining and get the hell geared up.”
She had fully expected McKay to throw a tantrum at that but astoundingly he had gritted his teeth, gotten his act together and trudged through the ‘gate along side them. On the way to the settlement Lorne and Cadman had shown why soldiers and scientists alike feared them when they were together and had given McKay a tough time. Certainly deserved but she was still surprised at how well he had been able to hold his own against them… something even she sometimes had difficulties with.
This time, however, she had taken care to stay out of it most of the time, instead opting for listening and observing and gathering evidence for backing up the bet she placed in the pool regarding the question of how long it will take Lorne and Cadman to hop into bed with each other. Most of the other Marines put their money on something between two weeks and three months but she opted for at least a year, maybe never; wondering time and again what made the rest misjudge both officers’ brains so gravely. They’re just too smart to risk their careers for something like that.
Anyway, in the end they had arrived at the settlement… which was when the real fun began. Usually, van der Groeten handled all the greetings and introductions and that had indeed saved their butts more often than they all liked to admit. Since he’d been incapacitated for this mission, they had agreed on Lorne handling all the formal stuff but unfortunately… the woman in the lead had addressed Cadman immediately. She’s still not quite sure if she really heard McKay mumble “Not another Amazon tribe,” at seeing that their welcome party had consisted nearly completely of women of all ages; half of them dressed as warriors and the other half in very formal civilian attire.
Then, a little flustered Cadman had tried to indicate that Major Lorne was the one in charge not her, frantically pointing to him and trying to make his status clear to the villagers. That had been necessary because of course of all the off-world teams theirs was always the only one getting missions to those few tribes who do not understand English or just any other Earth language. At first the leading woman had looked like she had understood, turned to Major Lorne and… given him a very thorough sizing up.
That had caused Cadman to mumble a little disturbed, “Uh… I have the feeling that she’s taking a rather strange interest in you, sir.”
Lorne had wanted to answer something but had hesitated because the woman had started to circle him and that had seemed to be just a little distracting. So instead McKay had seized his opportunity to get a stab at Cadman and had replied, “Gee, jealous much, Lieutenant?” The only reason she had been able to hold back a snort or even a grin at that had been the look of scathing evil Cadman had sent McKay over the village woman’s shoulder. Not even she is brave - or stupid - enough to get on Cadman’s bad side when she’s wearing that look.
After that things had kinda deteriorated because instead of starting to talk to Lorne… the woman had beamed at Cadman, bumped her fist against the Lieutenant’s one and had motioned for Lorne to follow her in a rather demanding way. That had been the moment where it had dawned on all of them what exactly had just happened and she had taken it upon herself to be the one actually saying it out loud, “Uh… not to be a prophet of doom or something, ma’am, but… I think you just sold our CO.”
Everyone had turned around first to her, a little flabbergasted at her blunt summary of the situation and then Cadman had turned around to the woman again, almost frantically trying to tell her that this was all a mistake and that Major Lorne was most certainly not for sale. Lorne for his part had wisely stayed out of this, having realized pretty fast that ‘wares’ don’t talk. That hadn't kept him from throwing Cadman some pretty dark looks, though.
Since she knew Cadman would tell her if she needed her help, she stayed out of it as well, not fully able to hold back a smirk now and then… and then suddenly she had looked at McKay and had seen the same smirk mirrored on his face. That had surprised both of them enough that they had avoided looking at each other altogether for the rest of the exchange.
In the end, Cadman hadn't been able to make it clear to them Atlantis usually did not sell their men in exchange for whatever their trading partners had to offer but she could work out a deal to buy Major Lorne back. Apparently, the village had planned a feast and had been short on hunters and the women had recognized their P90s for their worth in slaughtering animals. So they had come to the agreement that they would get the locals what they needed for their feast and they in turn had - hopefully - agreed to let the Major go.
Which is why they are now wading through knee-deep mud. In front of her Cadman follows their guide with a stoic determination on her face that she always has when she sets her mind to something. Behind her is McKay, now and then muttering about the space mosquitoes that keep soaring around them even despite the nearly freezing temperatures that will surely eat them up or do something worse like turn them into zombies or something.
She’s just a little tempted to turn around, shove her P90 into his face and make him shut the hell up - she has this feeling that it wouldn’t even get her in trouble with either Lieutenant Cadman or Major Lorne - but just in that moment, their guide rises her hand and motions them to crouch down and be quiet. Just great. Now not only their feet and calves are immersed in mud but their legs on the whole and even parts of their lower body. It doesn’t help that the mud is only slightly warmer than the air.
With her hand the guide gestures shortly towards a group of creatures that look like black birds with long beaks - possibly cormorans, her bird-watching crazy uncle would have said - that are visible through the waving branches of reed. Uh-huh. Obviously they’re supposed to get some of those beasts for the feast. Judging by the fingers the guide holds up… ten?
At that, she exchanges a look with Cadman and they both grimace. Argh. McKay must have seen this and promptly comments in a not exactly quiet voice, “What, are you two super soldiers out of ideas already?”
This time, the scathing look comes from both of them but McKay doesn’t do them the favor of budging. Huh. It’s Cadman who answers him in the end, keeping her voice as low as possible but not able to keep the impatient edge out of it, “This is sharpshooter work, Rodney. And as you might have noticed, the P90 is not what I’d call a sharpshooter’s dream.”
“Aren’t bombs more of your specialty, anyway?” McKay replies, with that sneer on his face ignoring all three of them - Cadman, herself and their guide - glaring at him because he just won’t lower his voice.
But instead of giving something equally sarcastic back, Cadman’s face suddenly lights up… and she gets that slightly maniacal glint in her eyes that indicates imminent use of C4. Oh goody, she thinks kind of pleased; at least she gets to watch something nice today. “That’s it, Rodney. You’re a genius!”
A little taken aback, McKay stutters, “I am?” before realizing what he just said and adding a little indignantly, “Of course I am. That’s why Sheppard sent me along with you.” No… not exactly, she’s about to say but a warning glance from Cadman keeps her from doing it. Cadman has some idea involving a little detonating and is itching to try it out. Somehow… she’s glad Major Lorne isn't here because if there’s one thing he still isn't quite comfortable with after three months of having Cadman on his team it’s her explosion-happiness.
For example, it’s powerful enough to keep her even focused enough to ignore McKay being a pompous ass - although… that little hesitation and moment of insecurity somehow told her it’s probably all just for show and that surprises her - and simply says, “Get over yourself, McKay. I want to do this dynamite fishing style and I need someone to check my calculations. Think you can do that?”
That was probably the wrong thing to say because suddenly McKay puffs up like an enormous bird. Actually… it looks quite cute… and that thought kind of scares her so she banishes it very fast. “Listen, Cadman, this brain has saved countless of planets. The thought that I should use it to check your meager little…”
“It also destroyed at least one solar system,” Cadman dead-pans and the way McKay stops mid-sentence to stare at her dumfounded at her sheer audacity to interrupt him seems to satisfy her profoundly. “Can we get to work now?” Seems like someone is really eager to bust a few birds… or is there more to it? After all, someone is depending on their success, waiting back in that village to give Cadman a piece or two about selling him. Could it be that Cadman… is a little anxious to keep Lorne’s disapproval down to a minimum?
And to be honest… she would like to get this over with as well so she simply says, “Of course, ma’am,” this time throwing McKay an evil glare herself. Thankfully, with that it seems to be settled, Cadman uses her hand and feet to explain to their slightly wary guide what they’re planning and then pulls out good old pen and paper. Working fast, she scratches a few figures on her notepad, erases some, scratches some new ones… and then hands them to McKay. She expects him to pull out one of those Ancient gadgets all the scientists usually carry around with them but after a short moment of automatically reaching for one of his vest’s pockets, he has obviously decided to rely on praised brain, corrects a few of Cadman’s figures and hands it back to her.
After that… it’s only a matter of timing and aiming grenades. The result is pretty enough that even Major Lorne would have been impressed and she regrets secretly not to have brought a camera because she’s sure that some pictures would seriously help in convincing him not to be pissed at Cadman because quite honestly… this mess was not really her fault. And for some reason she can’t stand Lorne and Cadman being pissed at each other, even if it is just one-sided… probably it’s because when they are getting at each others’ throats she always is afraid that her assessment was all wrong and she’ll lose the money in the betting pool against those who bet on them landing in bed in the next few weeks.
When the small bombing raid on the birds’ resting place is over, they have 13 dead or wounded birds to scoop up - she files this example of precision away in case she might need it to appease Lorne - and can finally make it back to the settlement.
It takes them another 30 minutes to get there but they’re worth the reception after their guide told them about their little foray into dynamite hunting with the appropriate great gestures and appreciative faces. Cadman obviously is the hero of the day and her mud-smeared face and the big grin in it seem to amuse Lorne enough that he momentarily forgets that he’s still technically a possession of the village matriarch.
The only one not quite happy is McKay, mumbling something about having been cheated out of his credit for this whole thing and she suddenly finds herself saying, “Don’t fret, Doc. You did pretty well and I’m sure the Lieutenant appreciates it as well.” Originally… she’d said it mostly to just shut him up but it had come out much nicer than she had intended it to and McKay’s face actually lights up in a smile.
“At least one person here recognizes my contribution. You surely are exceptionally bright for a grunt, Melder.” Yeah, great. That’s what you get for being nice. Not even bothering to correct him on her name she just rolls her eyes and turns towards the brightly lit house that seems to serve as a kind of town hall here. This is really the last time ever she was nice to Dr. McKay again, she decides and goes looking for her two superiors.
She finds them engrossed in talking at the table and wants to join them… but is stopped momentarily by Lorne reaching out and almost wiping a speck of dirt from Cadman’s cheeks before he seems to remember just who is sitting opposite him grinning and gesturing. Dammit, she has to do something about this or all her money will be down the drain in a few weeks time. Well, that and both Lorne’s and Cadman’s careers and she would really like to keep both of them as her commanding officers for a little while longer.
So she decides to go in full force, plunges herself on the bank opposite to them and says, “Dr. McKay’s being a prima donna again, sir. Just thought I should tell you.” Okay, that was not nice to McKay but he did bring this upon himself.
Cadman and Lorne seize their bantering and look at her… almost a little guiltily. Argh. But at least they know what they did wrong. And thankfully they’re both professionals enough that they can cover up this fast enough. Lorne doesn’t even need to clear his throat to switch almost effortlessly into CO mode again. “Remind me that we have to talk about your attitude towards high-ranking civilians again, Sergeant.”
She can’t help grinning at him and a short look towards Cadman tells her that the other Marine is as amused as she is. “Sure, sir.”
And since this is about McKay… that’s really all that has be said about this and Lorne changes the topic, “Anyway… what did we learn today, team?” Both Cadman and she know what he is referring to and he probably knows that he sure as hell won’t get them to say “Never let Sheppard send you on a meet-and-greet without giving you the proper anthropological briefings about the locals.”
And yeah, in the end it’s Cadman who answers, still grinning, “You can never have too many cormorans.”
Suppressing a snort she feels compelled to add quite straight-faced, “Or strange alien birds that look like cormorans, anyway.”
It makes Lorne roll his eyes but before he can give them a piece of his mind about this, McKay suddenly pipes up from behind her, “So… what’s for dinner? I’m starving.” At everyone turning towards him he just raises his hands and adds, “What? I just helped Cadman to blow up a whole colony of essentially defenseless and probably harmless alien birds. That was pretty strenuous.” Lorne and Cadman exchange a mutual eye-rolling but McKay ignores it and simply sits down beside her of all people. Oh well. Hopefully the birds are good enough to make up for this. And at least this whole ordeal confirmed her initial assessment: It really never gets boring on Major Lorne’s team… which is actually a very good thing.
~*~
TBC in I Hate You.