FanFic100: #002 Middles
“This is stupid, Laura, and you know it!” Wham. A door slams open and their former team leader, Lieutenant Colonel Evan Lorne, comes running through the team ready room, chasing their only female team member, newly promoted 1st Lieutenant Laura Cadman in what looks like one of their most spectacular fights… well, yet.
“One… two… three…” He looks beside him, where Harry Linley has been sitting on the ready room’s couch - when did that thing get here, anyway? - and looks like he’s sorely missing… well… popcorn.
He sighs. This has been going on for about an hour now, ever since Laura came to him to tell him about some thing or the other and suddenly Lorne had come storming into the ready room, pretty worked up.
Ever since then… they’ve been at it, shouting at each other, running from one door to the other, chasing each other… And yes, in that moment, the other door opens again and Laura comes flying through it. “I can’t believe you just called me stupid!” Both Linley’s and his head follow her marching through the room to the door Lorne just had come through.
“My money’s on Caddy, all the way.” Linley again but before he can answer, Lorne comes storming in again, chasing after Laura.
“Well, what else should I call you? Foolish? Half-witted? Harebrained?” Ouch. If Lorne would have taken the time and actually stopped and stayed in the room he would have told him now that this was about the most stupid thing he could have said in this whole situation. He knows that Janice, his wife, would probably move back to her mother if he said that to her, so he mentally prepares for Laura going off like a mid-sized nuke. At least.
Beside him, Linley just made a choking noise. He smirks. “Everything okay, Harry?”
Linley coughs. Then, “Yeah… yeah, sure. Unless… you happen to have some popcorn ready?” Ah, he knows that tone. Outwardly, Linley is still trying to be the cocky bastard, but underneath he’s already bracing himself for the inevitable fall out that’s going to come now. But… it’s silent… they look at each other, him questioning and Linley just shrugging.
Mentally, he begins a countdown from ten, a bit like the one Linley just did… and when he’s at six, the silence is broken. “Harebrained? Harebrained? Who do think you are, Lieutenant Colonel ‘Sure that there are two lines on that thing?’?” Okay… at least now they have an inkling what this whole thing could be about… Or at least he has, because he asked Janice exactly the same thing two weeks ago.
Linley, though, looks at him, clueless. Seems like Charlotte and he aren’t that far in their family planning yet. He sighs and mouths “Laura’s pregnant,” and Linley’s face lights up in sudden realization… and then it looks… shocked. Another suppressed sigh. Yeah, that is surprising news. He just hopes she actually just learned about that because as her new CO… he does have some choice words about being left in the dark about something like this.
“I think I’m that baby’s goddamn father and I know that there are fucking regs for pregnant Marines and I also think that I do not want you to fly across half the country in your condition!” He’s pretty sure he knows what’s coming now.
“In my condition? In my condition? For God’s sake, I’m pregnant, not ill!” Yep, exactly that. And he’s starting to get increasingly uncomfortable sitting here, listening to a domestic fight about something rather private and he already wants to give Linley a jerk of his head and drag him out of the room but Linley… looks to be too interested to even think about leaving the room.
But one can still try, right? “Harry…” Linley just waves his hand.
“No, no, wait. I just want to test a theory…” A theory? A theory? A little flabbergasted, he stares at Linley. “Come on, Jim; don’t tell me you haven’t had the thought before.” Thought? Which thought? “Jim, seriously… look at them. I mean, the way they are fighting… says a lot about… other things they do, huh?”
He turns to Linley, his face kind of… disgusted. “God, Harry, I did not want to hear this about Laura and… our goddamn ex-CO. And… why in hell would anyone want to think about that, let alone you?” Linley wants to answer but gets interrupted again.
“Yeah, but it’s not even three months since you recovered from your complications and… Laura! Stay here, goddammit!” Laura, however, obviously shows no inclination to stay where she is because she comes charging back into the room. But instead of running past him and Linley, she comes to stand directly in front of them, followed by an irate Evan Lorne.
“Guys, could one of you please tell this overprotective mother hen here that I’m okay and that accompanying him to his parents shouldn’t pose any threat to my health?” He wants to open his mouth but is a tad too slow because now it’s Lorne’s turn.
“Yeah, and while you try that, could you please tell this inconsiderate happy-go-lucky girl here that it’s forbidden for pregnant Marines to do anything even remotely close to combat? Jim?” Oh, great. Why him? Why always him?
Oh, right. Because Lorne made sure he would be promoted to Major and given the command of SG1 before he himself was transferred out of the SGC. He’s still not quite sure if the Colonel meant it as a reward or a punishment and at the moment… he’d just bet it was the latter. Both Laura and Lorne are glaring at him, both in their unique ways. And is Linley wearing his “Hey, all I need now is popcorn.”-face again? He resists a sigh.
“Hate to say it, Laura… But the Colonel is right. There are rules about that and I really hope you actually intended me to be the first one to hear about it. After you, of course, sir.” Now Lorne looks kind of… smug while Laura… he can’t even look her in the eye and he’s her goddamn CO.
“There you go, Miss ‘I’m pregnant, not ill!’. Your CO has spoken. No more missions for you and certainly no fly…” Laura’s throws her hands into the air.
“Alright, fine, I’ll give you the missions,” she says and if it’s possible, Lorne looks even smugger now. He begins to wonder if Lorne hasn’t learned anything about women in general and Laura in particular during the time they have all served together. He’s pretty sure that Laura knew all along she’d never be allowed to continue serving on the team and that she never meant to fight for this seriously. “But you stop this “No flying!”-business. Or you’ll be reunited with your old friend the couch tonight.” Ouch. That was mean, even for Laura.
Lorne glares at her and Laura glares back but he doesn’t take his eyes off the two, simply because he’s afraid to move. Beside him, Linley has become stock still as well, probably wishing he was invisible now. Yeah, well, serves him right, he thinks but keeps it all to himself. Then… after a seeming eternity, Lorne grinds out, “Stubborn wench.”
At that he already waits for another outburst but it never comes. Instead, Laura folds her arms in front of her chest and coolly replies, “Self-righteous dictator.”
It’s quiet for at least another second or two… well, until Linley interrupts in a voice that’s half cheerful and half astonished, “You hear that, man? That is real love.”
Immediately, all heads turn to Linley and they have the rare pleasure to see him turn bright red in the face. “Uh… well… uh… you know… I’ve got this… uh… thing I need to take care off and… well… um…” Without even waiting for his brain to find the appropriate words of excuse, Linley’s up and running to… somewhere. He can’t help but grin just a little bit while getting up himself.
“I think it’s safe to say you won’t mind me taking care of some paperwork as well, right, sir? Laura?” After another moment of being flabbergasted, both Laura and Lorne shake their heads and so he turns to go and finally leaves the two alone but Lorne clears his throat and that makes him turn around again.
“You know, Jim… you might want to try “Evan” next time we talk to each other.” Wow. Even though Laura kept telling him that it was long overdue that Lorne and he stopped calling each other by their ranks, it’s still surprising him now that the offer is actually on the table.
So all he can bring himself to is smile and say, “Yes, sir.” With that, he finally turns around to leave the room, hearing a not so stern anymore “As for you, young lady…” from Lorne when he’s half out of the door.
He half expects to hear Laura going off again but instead of a new shouting match all he gets is a moment of silence and then a very pronounced “Ah, screw it!”
Originally, he’d wanted to simply vanish but… at that he simply can’t help turning around one last time. The sight that presents itself to him… is just a little bit of a shock for him, though, just because he never really saw them like this before.
In the room, Lorne and Laura have finally stopped arguing and have moved on to… the reconciliation. The rather… pronounced reconciliation. As in passionately kissing reconciliation. He smirks to himself, wondering what Linley would say to that but ultimately deciding to keep this to himself as he exits the room. Laura and Lorne… they have been through enough trouble to deserve people not talking about them, just for once. But maybe… phoning Janice would be nice now… just to hear her voice… and maybe tell her about why he has to go looking for two replacements now. Yeah, he thinks smiling, she’s gonna like that.
~*~
TBC