Fic: Lionheart (Regulus Fic, Rating R)

[gehayi]

Title: Lionheart
Author: Gehayi
Rating: R
Warnings: Mention of slash relationship, character death
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by J.K. Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and

Comments

[polaris_starz]

WAH.

Ow.

My heart-- that thing on the floor there in itty-bitty pieces? I'd like that back, although getting it back intact doesn't seem like an option at this point.

WAH, Regulus! You're not supposed to make me love the characters who I know have to die! *wibble*

The last line especially. So lovely and painful.

Want to smack Sirius now.

[gehayi]

Want to smack Sirius now.

And now you know why I've been wanting to smack the boy for the past week.

WAH, Regulus! You're not supposed to make me love the characters who I know have to die! *wibble*

Regulus' death is so often handled by depicting him as doing something stupid that gets him killed. The problem is, my Regulus isn't stupid, and he'd know that defying Voldemort was conceivably hazardous to his health. So I decided to come up with a reason that Regulus would have defied Voldemort--would have chosen to die, as Lily did--to save someone whom he loved.

[genarti]

Oh, that's lovely. I especially love his conversation with Sirius, and how unrelenting Sirius is, keeping the grudge going and steadfastly refusing to understand, while Remus sees deeper and understands what Regulus is trying to say when even his own brother cannot. I wonder if Remus told Sirius what the conversation was about, later?

A couple of minor comments: Te caeco is definitely better Latin than most of J.K. Rowling's incantations, but the accuracy suffers because of that, IMO. I'd omit the "te," because we never see a direct object in any of her spells (well, except for an English noun in Accio), even the ones directed against a single person. The wand-pointing (or intention) takes care of that, apparently. Also, I assume "If you cannot, then kill him" is still Voldemort speaking through the parchment? If so, it should be bolded too.

Other than than, excellent! Painful and lovely

[gehayi]

I wonder if Remus told Sirius what the conversation was about, later?

I'm sure he tried to after Reg left, and I'm certain that he actually did so when Regulus' body was found. (It was one of their less pleasant conversations.)

Also, I assume "If you cannot, then kill him" is still Voldemort speaking through the parchment? If so, it should be bolded too.

Arrgh! Thanks, I missed that. It's fixed now.

Te caeco is definitely better Latin than most of J.K. Rowling's incantations...

Well, yes. That's the result of four years of Latin, plus my rationalisation that the caster wouldn't want to blind himself or herself by accident. (Te caeco has actually shown up before, in the Regulus Arc, so, even though this isn't a Regulus Arc story, I left the spell as is.)

Other than than, excellent! Painful and lovely.

Thank you! I'm glad that you found it excellent.

[phfa]

That's- that's so sad! Oh I'm not sure what to say, except that my eyes are pricking for Regulus. He's such a tragedy, so sad.

I adore the relationship between Sirius and Regulus- of course it's terrible that they never had a chance (or never took the chance) to make up. But the fact that Regulus is willing to go through all of that to protect Sirius... that's just incredible.

But as he lay on the dusty wooden floor of Lynwood's church, blind, bleeding, crippled and shuddering in pain, ... and the taste of a loving woman's hot sweet mouth against his own.

*cries*
That paragraph made me think that there was a chance, just a chance that he could live. Just for a moment. Then I thought that no, he'd die, and Sirius and Remus wouldn't get their protection, and I got even more anxious, and was hardly blinking as i read the rest of the story. Gripping stuff, and you have a wonderful way with words- but I've told you that before, I'm sure.

[gehayi]

I adore the relationship between Sirius and Regulus- of course it's terrible that they never had a chance (or never took the chance) to make up. But the fact that Regulus is willing to go through all of that to protect Sirius... that's just incredible.

If only Regulus were less emotionally crippled, and could tell his brother that he loves him. And if only Sirius were willing to listen when Regulus told him that...

That paragraph made me think that there was a chance, just a chance that he could live. Just for a moment.

I think that there was a chance he could have survived, provided he'd received some magical medical care.

This is the point at which Regulus realises that he has to choose to die. And he's young and, before being cursed and blinded, strong. Death is hard to choose when you're eighteen and love living.

I don't think he expected to have to make that choice twice.

And thank you. I'm glad you found it gripping and well done!

[gehayi]

Meep! Er...thank you!

[thistlerose]

Oh, Regulus. You poor, tragic, muddled boy. I'm so glad he was able to do the noble thing, even if it was at the end of his life. Sirius and Remus will never know how they came to be so protected. *sniffles*

The descriptions of Regulus' pain were very vivid, as were the descriptions of his sad childhood. (You mentioned a sister! Excuse me while I squee.)

This was very, very good. :)

[gehayi]

I'm so glad he was able to do the noble thing, even if it was at the end of his life. Sirius and Remus will never know how they came to be so protected. *sniffles*

Well, the way I figure it, Sirius would find out after he fell through the Veil--which would have killed him ordinarily, but which didn't, thanks to the stipulations of the spell that Regulus cast--that Sirius and Remus could not be killed by Death Eaters, and that any non-fatal spell cast in malice or spite could injure but could not kill. I'm sure that Regulus would have been there, and would have had a few things to say to his brother. I'd like to think that they finally made up, too.

(You mentioned a sister! Excuse me while I squee.)

Yep! Regulus doesn't remember Electra, at least not consciously, but I think there's just a touch of subconscious memory lurking there. (I think that this is the Regulus of "Dazzle" and "Sculptor's Block," incidentally.)

This was very, very good. :)Thank you! Sorry I couldn't come up with a War of the Roses thing for your challenge.