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tikvah February 20 2006, 03:51:29 UTC
Very nice.

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gehayi February 20 2006, 04:06:45 UTC
Thanks.

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ani_bester February 20 2006, 06:47:57 UTC
This was the most poetically beautiful sotry I've read in a long time . . outside the works of Mr. Bradbury.

You captured the feeling of Mr. Abrries writing so well here, and the extended metaphor worked perfectly. Wonderufl job!

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gehayi February 20 2006, 07:03:16 UTC
Considering how much I love Bradbury, I'm very flattered. Thank you.

And I had a lot of fun including detail after detail from Peter Pan.

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Deep jazzypom February 20 2006, 12:26:02 UTC
Your lines are nice lines, but these are the nicest of all.

But he would not and could not stab his brother in the back. Sirius still had a hook in his heart.

Nor could he slay Andromeda (who'd been his mother when his mother wasn't there-and sometimes when his mother was) or Andromeda's seven-year-old daughter, Dora, happily playing in her Wendy house.

Awww.

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Re: Deep gehayi February 20 2006, 14:41:55 UTC
Thanks. It's always good when I can make someone go "Awwww."

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cygna_hime February 20 2006, 16:44:03 UTC
Lovely. Simply lovely. I particularly like the way the Peter Pan story fits so well around and through the House of Black story.

Mother, fearing he'd be easily seduced from a world more full of weeping than he could understand, washed the stardust from his eyes That's just a beautiful line.

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gehayi February 20 2006, 17:51:11 UTC
Thank you. (And you're right, the story does fit amazingly well.)

As for that line being beautiful...I can't take credit for it. That's the line from Yeats. Here's the poem:

THE STOLEN CHILD

Where dips the rocky highland
Of Sleuth Wood in the lake,
There lies a leafy island
Where flapping herons wake
The drowsy water-rats;
There we've hid our faery vats,
Full of berries
And of reddest stolen chetries.
Come away, O human child!
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand.

Where the wave of moonlight glosses
The dim grey sands with light,
Far off by furthest Rosses
We foot it all the night,
Weaving olden dances,
Mingling hands and mingling glances
Till the moon has taken flight;
To and fro we leap
And chase the frothy bubbles,
While the world is full of troubles
And is anxious in its sleep.
Come away, O human child!
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world's more full of weeping than you can understand.Where the wandering water ( ... )

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etrangere February 21 2006, 21:12:41 UTC
Brillant !
Sirius is Peter Pan, isn't he ?! I love all the rewriting in the setting, and I love Regulus' bravery... and the ending ♥

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gehayi February 22 2006, 02:31:53 UTC
Oh, Sirius TOTALLY is Peter Pan.

I do think that Sirius underestimated Regulus, and that after Reg's death, he felt guilty about that. That's why he told Harry that Reg was soft and weak. If Regulus was soft and weak, that means that Sirius was right all along, and nothing could have saved Regulus, nothing at all.

And I love your Sirius and Regulus icon? May I steal it? I promise to credit the maker.

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etrangere February 23 2006, 11:25:01 UTC
Yeah, I also think that Sirius felt guilty about Regulus. He did take the trouble to investigate why he died, so he must have felt concerned. And it must have broken his heart to think that he might have prevented it.

Of course, go ahead. It was by wildmusings ^^

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