Hide You Away
Title: Hide You Away
Author: smallearthcat
Pairing: Steve/Danny
Rating: R
Summary: Danny explains the situation a little further.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Hawaii Five-0, and this certainly isn’t true.
Author notes: Written for mmom day 10. Comments and con. crit. are much appreciated. Follows Lick It Up.
Steve had sort of completely forgotten that the next day was actually Saturday, which meant that he wouldn't be seeing Danny unless he made a point of going over to Danny's apartment (or if Danny came to his place, but Steve figured that was probably less likely, given the situation). And it'd been sort of a rough night, not because there was anything really wrong, but because the longer he stayed up thinking, the more questions he came up with.
There are all sorts of things he really kind of needs to know for anything to go anywhere with Danny, mostly background information and boundaries. Steve knows pretty much nothing about this, because understandably, Danny has never advertised it, and the only thing he knows for sure right now is that this is not going to stop him. Not if he has any say in it, anyway, because maybe he doesn't compromise on things all that often, but he knows how to negotiate the terms and is ready and willing to make this work. Now, all he has to do is get Danny on board.
When Steve gets to Danny's apartment, Danny opens the door with an, "Of course it's you, who else would it be? Well, come in. There clearly hasn't been enough abject humiliation in my life lately, so why don't we just remedy that right now."
Steve's brow furrows as he follows Danny inside. "Abject humiliation? Danny, what are you talking about?" Steve is pretty sure he'd have heard immediately if something that bad had happened to Danny.
"Yesterday, with the whole..." Danny waves his hands around to try to make his point, "you know. The thing I told you."
"How was that abject humiliation?" Danny opens his mouth, no doubt ready to lay into Steve, but Steve cuts him off. "I mean, that while that's obviously a difficult thing to tell someone, it didn't end that badly, right?"
"Didn't end that badly? Didn't end that badly? No, of course not. You just sent me home after you got off because you wanted some time to think things over. How could I possibly interpret that as anything but good?!"
And yeah, now Steve feels kind of stupid, because he hadn't really thought of it like that, and he sounds like kind of a dick the way Danny spun those events. "Look, Danno. I didn't mean it that way. I just wanted to be sure, wanted us both to be sure..." Steve ducks his head and rubs his hand over the back of his neck.
"I know, I know. I knew it last night, too. I've just been having a hard time convincing myself it wasn't a brush-off." Danny turns his back to Steve and starts fussing with the sheets that are waiting to be folded away now that Danny's bed is back in couch form.
And okay, so Steve's never been a big hugger, but Danny's posture is practically screaming 'dejected', and he can't help but respond to that. He strides forward the three steps it takes to reach Danny and slides his arms around Danny's waist, tightening them until Danny's back is flush against his front. He's relieved when Danny just leans back into him, accepting the gesture as the reassurance it's meant to be. Steve shoves his nose into Danny's neck and lets out a sigh of contentment. He really kind of likes it here.
"I get that this isn't easy for you, but could I ask you a few questions so I can try to get a handle on the situation?"
"You're going to have to know some of it sooner or later, anyway, so I suppose now is as good a time as any."
"Right uh, so..." Steve's words get stuck in his mouth, so instead, he goes with, "It's kind of early, but I'm guessing this would go over easier with a beer."
Danny disentangles himself from Steve's hold and goes to grab a couple from the fridge. Steve is a little bit disappointed , but he follows Danny, figuring this is the kind of conversation best done from across a table rather than in each other's space on a small sofa. Steve sits down one one side of the table and pops the top off the beer Danny hands him, taking a long pull before setting it down. Danny sits down opposite him and starts picking at the label on his own bottle, but otherwise remains silent.
Steve takes a breath and just goes for it. "I take it you've tried medications to help with your problem?"
Danny laughs mirthlessly. "Every one that my doctor would prescribe me. That's some fucking irony right there for you, huh? At my age, and I can't even get it up with a pill that's made to help men twice as old as I am."
"Is that why Rachel..."
Danny shrugs. "Straw that broke the camel's back. We'd already been fighting, but she stuck with me through the recovery and for awhile longer after that than she probably should have. Let me tell you, I was way more surprised than I should have been when she told me about Stan."
"And I take it you haven't seen anyone else since?"
"No point in it, really. At first it was too soon, and then just. I mean, there are a few other things I haven't tried that might be able to help, but why bother when there's no one to do it for? It's a vicious fucking cycle of 'why look for someone I won't be able to satisfy' and 'why try to fix my dick when I don't have anyone to have sex with, anyway?'."
That sounds like it could be promising, at least. Not that Steve's gonna push it, but it's good to know that there are options Danny hasn't tried yet. "Did you have a problem with what I did last night? Not the kicking you out afterward, but you know, the part before."
"Kind of the opposite, actually." Danny flushes a little bit, and Steve finds that he can't look away. "Rachel and I used to do that sometimes, when she was in the mood. I wasn't big on us touching each other much afterward, but well, talking I could do. And maybe I only got hard from it a few times, but the rest of me still thought it was hot."
"So you liked it, is what you're saying." Danny nods, and Steve continues. "Thought it was hot? Would do it again and think it was hot enough to get off to?"
"Yeah."
"See, that I can work with. You talk, I touch myself, you get hot, I get off, and we hope that you get hard sometime, too."
Danny finally looks up at Steve, and his smile is sort of heartbreaking, because it says he never expected someone to be willing to do something like this with him and for him, and it kind of makes Steve want to hide Danny away from the rest world.
"No more kicking me out for my own good, though, Steven, I mean it."
That sounds just fine to Steve, who is beginning to suspect he might not ever want to send Danny away again. Probably best not to let Danny know that just yet.
Read the next part in the series
This entry was originally posted at http://geenoway.dreamwidth.org/32666.html. You can also comment there using OpenID.
Author: smallearthcat
Pairing: Steve/Danny
Rating: R
Summary: Danny explains the situation a little further.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Hawaii Five-0, and this certainly isn’t true.
Author notes: Written for mmom day 10. Comments and con. crit. are much appreciated. Follows Lick It Up.
Steve had sort of completely forgotten that the next day was actually Saturday, which meant that he wouldn't be seeing Danny unless he made a point of going over to Danny's apartment (or if Danny came to his place, but Steve figured that was probably less likely, given the situation). And it'd been sort of a rough night, not because there was anything really wrong, but because the longer he stayed up thinking, the more questions he came up with.
There are all sorts of things he really kind of needs to know for anything to go anywhere with Danny, mostly background information and boundaries. Steve knows pretty much nothing about this, because understandably, Danny has never advertised it, and the only thing he knows for sure right now is that this is not going to stop him. Not if he has any say in it, anyway, because maybe he doesn't compromise on things all that often, but he knows how to negotiate the terms and is ready and willing to make this work. Now, all he has to do is get Danny on board.
When Steve gets to Danny's apartment, Danny opens the door with an, "Of course it's you, who else would it be? Well, come in. There clearly hasn't been enough abject humiliation in my life lately, so why don't we just remedy that right now."
Steve's brow furrows as he follows Danny inside. "Abject humiliation? Danny, what are you talking about?" Steve is pretty sure he'd have heard immediately if something that bad had happened to Danny.
"Yesterday, with the whole..." Danny waves his hands around to try to make his point, "you know. The thing I told you."
"How was that abject humiliation?" Danny opens his mouth, no doubt ready to lay into Steve, but Steve cuts him off. "I mean, that while that's obviously a difficult thing to tell someone, it didn't end that badly, right?"
"Didn't end that badly? Didn't end that badly? No, of course not. You just sent me home after you got off because you wanted some time to think things over. How could I possibly interpret that as anything but good?!"
And yeah, now Steve feels kind of stupid, because he hadn't really thought of it like that, and he sounds like kind of a dick the way Danny spun those events. "Look, Danno. I didn't mean it that way. I just wanted to be sure, wanted us both to be sure..." Steve ducks his head and rubs his hand over the back of his neck.
"I know, I know. I knew it last night, too. I've just been having a hard time convincing myself it wasn't a brush-off." Danny turns his back to Steve and starts fussing with the sheets that are waiting to be folded away now that Danny's bed is back in couch form.
And okay, so Steve's never been a big hugger, but Danny's posture is practically screaming 'dejected', and he can't help but respond to that. He strides forward the three steps it takes to reach Danny and slides his arms around Danny's waist, tightening them until Danny's back is flush against his front. He's relieved when Danny just leans back into him, accepting the gesture as the reassurance it's meant to be. Steve shoves his nose into Danny's neck and lets out a sigh of contentment. He really kind of likes it here.
"I get that this isn't easy for you, but could I ask you a few questions so I can try to get a handle on the situation?"
"You're going to have to know some of it sooner or later, anyway, so I suppose now is as good a time as any."
"Right uh, so..." Steve's words get stuck in his mouth, so instead, he goes with, "It's kind of early, but I'm guessing this would go over easier with a beer."
Danny disentangles himself from Steve's hold and goes to grab a couple from the fridge. Steve is a little bit disappointed , but he follows Danny, figuring this is the kind of conversation best done from across a table rather than in each other's space on a small sofa. Steve sits down one one side of the table and pops the top off the beer Danny hands him, taking a long pull before setting it down. Danny sits down opposite him and starts picking at the label on his own bottle, but otherwise remains silent.
Steve takes a breath and just goes for it. "I take it you've tried medications to help with your problem?"
Danny laughs mirthlessly. "Every one that my doctor would prescribe me. That's some fucking irony right there for you, huh? At my age, and I can't even get it up with a pill that's made to help men twice as old as I am."
"Is that why Rachel..."
Danny shrugs. "Straw that broke the camel's back. We'd already been fighting, but she stuck with me through the recovery and for awhile longer after that than she probably should have. Let me tell you, I was way more surprised than I should have been when she told me about Stan."
"And I take it you haven't seen anyone else since?"
"No point in it, really. At first it was too soon, and then just. I mean, there are a few other things I haven't tried that might be able to help, but why bother when there's no one to do it for? It's a vicious fucking cycle of 'why look for someone I won't be able to satisfy' and 'why try to fix my dick when I don't have anyone to have sex with, anyway?'."
That sounds like it could be promising, at least. Not that Steve's gonna push it, but it's good to know that there are options Danny hasn't tried yet. "Did you have a problem with what I did last night? Not the kicking you out afterward, but you know, the part before."
"Kind of the opposite, actually." Danny flushes a little bit, and Steve finds that he can't look away. "Rachel and I used to do that sometimes, when she was in the mood. I wasn't big on us touching each other much afterward, but well, talking I could do. And maybe I only got hard from it a few times, but the rest of me still thought it was hot."
"So you liked it, is what you're saying." Danny nods, and Steve continues. "Thought it was hot? Would do it again and think it was hot enough to get off to?"
"Yeah."
"See, that I can work with. You talk, I touch myself, you get hot, I get off, and we hope that you get hard sometime, too."
Danny finally looks up at Steve, and his smile is sort of heartbreaking, because it says he never expected someone to be willing to do something like this with him and for him, and it kind of makes Steve want to hide Danny away from the rest world.
"No more kicking me out for my own good, though, Steven, I mean it."
That sounds just fine to Steve, who is beginning to suspect he might not ever want to send Danny away again. Probably best not to let Danny know that just yet.
Read the next part in the series
This entry was originally posted at http://geenoway.dreamwidth.org/32666.html. You can also comment there using OpenID.