Seeking the Geeks at Seek a Geek

[ganimede]

Following on from my post the other day asking for input on my dating site profile, I signed up for http://seek-a-geek.co.uk. I picked that one primarily because it mentioned Doctor Who on the front page and it seemed to be linked with the denofgeek.co.uk site so I took that all to be a good

Comments

[sopoliini]

You might be better off using a bigger, more mainstream site for dating. Sadly most of the 'thematic' ones are small and mostly filled with people who are either not seriously looking or seem to have no other personality traits than just the one the site is aimed at. Anyone worth being in a relationship with will be able to define themselves by more than just 'being geeky' and should stick out well enough even in a bigger dating pool.

[ganimede]

I don't understand why people would pay £20 a month if they're not seriously looking. As for the lack of geeks, the site doesn't seem to be set up for geeks anyway. Geeks are a current fashion but the sort of people who claim they are geeks really aren't and wouldn't be attracted to an actual geek. Like I said in my previous post, I already tried OK Cupid and I got no response on there after several months. The messages I got today might not have been suitable but it was more than I got from a bigger more mainstream site.

[sopoliini]

I have honestly no clue why they would but some do. People will throw money at the weirdest shit if they get some kind of gratification out of it and on dating sites it seems that the gratification for some of those people isn't 'getting dates'. (And occasionally I suspect sites 'employ' certain people/bots to send messages as to seduce people into paying so they can read them

[momentsmusicaux]

AFAIK the thematic ones are mostly made by slapping some branding on an out-of-the-box product that's sold by the firm who handle the server and the data. I suspect that they either have data in common, or copy profiles between sites to make them look more populated

[ftmichael]

That is the least geeky 'geeky' site I have ever seen. And the picture rejections and random account deactivation are just the icing on the cake. Feh. :(

[ganimede]

It's brilliant, isn't it? So glad I never paid for it. I've still had no response as to why my Ten photo was rejected and despite my other photo supposedly being approved, it still doesn't show up on my profile. It doesn't look like I'm going to get anything out of it anyway - you have to pay to read messages and there doesn't seem to be anyone I want to message as it is. Think I might be deleting this account.

[ellierachael]

Yeah that interests tick box thing does seem pretty main stream doesn't it?

[ganimede]

Too right! But there seems to be some suggestion that it's a non-geeky dating site with a geek-themed front page and all the members content is taken from the other non-geek site. I wonder if I'd paid for it, could I sue them for false pretences?

[hobbitblue]

Not impressed, also I'd like to date someone who can write a complete sentence with correct spelling (how outlandish...!). Not really used dating sites much, I'm on OKcupid and found some interesting profiles of lovely ladies but even with specifying "women only" i got gormless blokes messaging me (can't read *or* write..). Um, have you considered the kinky site, FetLife? Its not just for bondage freaks, it covers plenty of vanilla stuff and even though you'd think it was just for sex-orientated folk it actually has a bigger proportion of clear thinking intelligent people looking for contacts, lots of individual groups for various interests, mostly kink related yes but I reckon you'll have more luck on finding someone interesting there, most of the worthwhile people have taken time and trouble to write good bios as well so you can spot the eedjits right quick. Its free too (mainly cos their paid version has run into problems but its only the video content that's premium, not the actual contacting folk side of things).

[ganimede]

My profile ended with a sentence saying something along the lines of "if you like [these things] then we'll probably get along really well". After I saw those bios, I updated it to end with "but if u rite in ur bio like this then we probably won't." It makes me despair to think that 'must be able to use proper grammar and sentence structure' needs to be a requirement.

I've vaguely heard of FetLife but I did think it was mostly for v kinky types so I didn't look into it any further. If it's free to contact people that's a bonus - it seems like being on most of the dating sites for free is pointless because you can't read or respond to any messages. Although I'm not sure if I'd do well on any dating site, I'm far too shy to contact anyone first and I could wait forever waiting for someone to contact me :-/

[hobbitblue]

Hehe, likely a lot of people will read that "ur bio" additon and wonder what you're on about, I sometimes think folk that write like that are completley unaware of how unintelligent it makes them seem, or trying to be cool which is even worse. So ok, I'm the one who uses semi colons in text messages but one has to have standards *g*

Give it a go, there's lots of kinky stuff but plenty of plain vanilla people there, and other than the ones using it for a fast hookup way of meeting like minds for sex, a lot of people are looking for conversation and friendship which is a good start before jumping into the dating thing in my view.. I've never actually done the dating thing, really, anybody I've gone out with (or slept with) has started out from a friendship thing and then suddenly developed (usually taking me completley by suprise also, I'm clueless about spotting if someone's interested...).

[ganimede]

I suppose it is a good way of judging whether a person has more than two brain cells to rub together or if they should be avoided like the plague. I'm pretty sure people who write like that don't realise that it makes them look like complete numpties, they probably think it makes them look like they're far too cool and busy to have time to type or spell properly. I always use proper spelling and punctuation in texts, if at all possible. When my mother got her first mobile and started texting I made the mistake of getting her a jokey little book with text abbreviations in (it was way back when the character limit was pretty small) and now she often makes up her own so I can't tell what she's going on about half the time

[insaneexistence]

it sounds like it would just be easier to go to conventions or become active in a fan/special interest group to meet more geeky folk...

[ganimede]

Probably would be if there were any! I've never heard of any conventions in my local area, they'd probably be in London if there were any and that's miles away. Plus, I don't have the money to go or any friends to go with :( What sort of fan/special interest group were you meaning?

[hobbitblue]

Eastercon is one I'd always love to go to, next year's in Glasgow. Lots of like minded sf fans, with panels and discussions but also social stuff, stalls selling things and room parties.. you probably know more people online that go to cons than you think (the buggers never mention it til after the fact in my experience mind, but they're there, oh yes..)

[ganimede]

I've never heard of Eastercon. It looks expensive though, £60 not including accommodation and travel costs?! The only sci fi type convention I've been to was a fan club one and that was several years ago. I don't think any of my friends go to conventions, they never mention it!