let it snow (3/3)
Title: Let It Snow
Media: Fic
Rating: PG-13
Pairings/Characters: Kurt/Blaine, Finn (with a hint of Faberry)
Word Count: ~1000 for this part / ~3700 total (how did that happen?)
Summary: As long as you love me so-- seriously, Rachel? What went down on the zombie hunt?
Author's Note: Thank you for blueb1rd for the beta! If any of you would like to follow me on tumblr, you can find me here.
PART ONE / PART TWO
“I thought he said he didn’t snore,” Blaine says, keeping his voice low so he doesn’t wake Kurt. The night spent in Kurt’s room after the party is a blur and he hasn’t had the chance to repeat it. Since then, he’s taken his word for it. Kurt is currently curled up against Blaine’s side, letting out an occasionally snuffle.
Finn shakes his head. “No, man. Some night it’s like he’s sawing logs or some shit. We’re just not allowed to tell him he snores. He thinks if we don’t speak of it, it means it didn’t actually happen. Like Fight Club, with snoring.”
“That makes no sense.”
“Your face makes no sense. Especially your eyebrows. They look like they’re trying to escape.”
Blaine self-consciously covers the top half of his face, scowling at Finn. “Well your tenor leaves a lot to be desired.”
“Yeah, well, I can’t be insulted if I don’t know what it means!” Finn counters with a victorious fist pump. “So, ha.”
Outside, the storm rages on. Snowflakes frost the windows in a way that makes the warmth of the Hummel-Hudson residence all the more inviting. With the exception of the small population of zombies lurking outside, it’s pretty much a winter wonderland. Come to think of it, there doesn’t seem to be any mainstream holiday songs concerning zombies. Finn makes a mental note to get together with Mr. Shuester and rectify this fact after the winter holidays.
You know, if their school is actually still standing come January.
Blaine flinches at the distant sound of a shotgun.
“What’d you think they were going to kill them with, snowballs?” Finn asks with a smirk.
“Well, I had been hoping...”
-
“So why aren’t we going outside again?” Finn asks, glaring at his companions with distaste. “I mean... zombies. And adventure! And zombies!”
“Well, for starters, we’re unarmed,” Blaine points out. “Our chances of survival are slim to none.” He pulls his cell phone out of his pocket and hands it to Finn. “But if it makes you feel any better, Rachel is texting me hourly updates of her headcount.”
Finn frowns as he grabs the phone from Blaine. It takes everything in his power not to comment on the rhinestones and the tassle hanging from the antenna. “Why would that make me feel better?”
“I don’t know, because your girlfriend is kind of a badass?”
One lightbulb moment later, Finn grins. “Oh, you’re right. That is kind of hot.”
“I said badass, not hot,” Blaine reminds him. “We’ve been down this road before. I appreciate Rachel in many ways, but her looks are not one of them. You know, unless it’s sweeps.”
“What are you even talking about?” Finn asks.
Blaine shrugs. “I don’t know, really. Sometimes I just talk to make noises.”
“I can see that.”
“Shouldn’t we check the news?” Blaine asks, reaching for the remote. He’s trying not to startle Kurt, and succeeds in his task halfway. Kurt paws at the air, reaching for an invisible attacker between snores.
Finn gives him an incredulous look. “Are you serious? That’s not how these things work, man. Society is going to crumble. We will wander from one safe house to the next. Life as we know it will never be the same.” He grins. “It’s going to be awesome.”
Blaine ignores him in favor of switching on the television. Conveniently enough, a news broadcast is already in progress.
‘Rod Remington here reporting to you live from the aftermath of Lima, Ohio’s short lived zombie outbreak...’
“What?” Finn gasps. “No! That’s so unfair, it can’t be over yet. It just started!”
Blaine shares his sentiments for more practical reasons. “Tell me about it. I have a term paper due on Monday and I was hoping to get a few extra days on it.”
“Would you two keep it down?” Kurt mumbles, blindly tossing one of the couch cushions in Finn’s direction.
‘According to a recent poll, Lima, Ohio has the highest percentage of zombie film enthusiasts in the United States. I’m not sure why such a poll was ever conducted, but there you have it.’
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Finn screams, throwing his remote at the screen.
‘Had this outbreak happened in any other town, chances are they wouldn’t have been nearly as prepared as Lima. After the break, we will be interviewing the manager of the local movie store along with our local heroes, Rachel Berry and Quinn Fabray.’
“So what was that you were saying about society crumbling?” Blaine asks with a wide grin.
Finn wishes he hadn’t wasted the remote on the television set. Blaine’s stupid face looks much more tempting.
EPILOGUE
“I’m here with Finn Hudson, boyfriend of local hero Rachel Berry. Finn, how does it feel to be dating one of the lovely ladies who saved our town from destruction?”
Finn all but shoves the microphone into the interviewers face. If a chair had been present, he would have kicked it. “It’s sucks! Do you know where I was during the zombie outbreak?” He gives the interviewer no time to respond. “I was stuck in my basement with my stupid kid brother and his stupid boyfriend and his stupid eyebrows. Do you know how many zombies I would have killed?”
“We know, Finn,” Kurt coos and reaches over to pinch his cheek. “You would have been a regular zombie killing machine!”
Blaine bounds over waving his copy of People magazine. “Hey, you guys! Rachel signed my copy of People! I’m totally going to to eBay this bitch.” He shoves the magazine in Finn’s face. Quinn and Rachel are pictured in an intimidating pose wearing their zombie killing garb. The caption reads: ‘Ladykillers.’
“Now, Finn, we know it has been reported that you and Rachel are dating, but what can you tell us about the relationship between her and Miss Fabray?” the interviewer interrupts. “Tumblr wants to know.”
Media: Fic
Rating: PG-13
Pairings/Characters: Kurt/Blaine, Finn (with a hint of Faberry)
Word Count: ~1000 for this part / ~3700 total (how did that happen?)
Summary: As long as you love me so-- seriously, Rachel? What went down on the zombie hunt?
Author's Note: Thank you for blueb1rd for the beta! If any of you would like to follow me on tumblr, you can find me here.
PART ONE / PART TWO
“I thought he said he didn’t snore,” Blaine says, keeping his voice low so he doesn’t wake Kurt. The night spent in Kurt’s room after the party is a blur and he hasn’t had the chance to repeat it. Since then, he’s taken his word for it. Kurt is currently curled up against Blaine’s side, letting out an occasionally snuffle.
Finn shakes his head. “No, man. Some night it’s like he’s sawing logs or some shit. We’re just not allowed to tell him he snores. He thinks if we don’t speak of it, it means it didn’t actually happen. Like Fight Club, with snoring.”
“That makes no sense.”
“Your face makes no sense. Especially your eyebrows. They look like they’re trying to escape.”
Blaine self-consciously covers the top half of his face, scowling at Finn. “Well your tenor leaves a lot to be desired.”
“Yeah, well, I can’t be insulted if I don’t know what it means!” Finn counters with a victorious fist pump. “So, ha.”
Outside, the storm rages on. Snowflakes frost the windows in a way that makes the warmth of the Hummel-Hudson residence all the more inviting. With the exception of the small population of zombies lurking outside, it’s pretty much a winter wonderland. Come to think of it, there doesn’t seem to be any mainstream holiday songs concerning zombies. Finn makes a mental note to get together with Mr. Shuester and rectify this fact after the winter holidays.
You know, if their school is actually still standing come January.
Blaine flinches at the distant sound of a shotgun.
“What’d you think they were going to kill them with, snowballs?” Finn asks with a smirk.
“Well, I had been hoping...”
-
“So why aren’t we going outside again?” Finn asks, glaring at his companions with distaste. “I mean... zombies. And adventure! And zombies!”
“Well, for starters, we’re unarmed,” Blaine points out. “Our chances of survival are slim to none.” He pulls his cell phone out of his pocket and hands it to Finn. “But if it makes you feel any better, Rachel is texting me hourly updates of her headcount.”
Finn frowns as he grabs the phone from Blaine. It takes everything in his power not to comment on the rhinestones and the tassle hanging from the antenna. “Why would that make me feel better?”
“I don’t know, because your girlfriend is kind of a badass?”
One lightbulb moment later, Finn grins. “Oh, you’re right. That is kind of hot.”
“I said badass, not hot,” Blaine reminds him. “We’ve been down this road before. I appreciate Rachel in many ways, but her looks are not one of them. You know, unless it’s sweeps.”
“What are you even talking about?” Finn asks.
Blaine shrugs. “I don’t know, really. Sometimes I just talk to make noises.”
“I can see that.”
“Shouldn’t we check the news?” Blaine asks, reaching for the remote. He’s trying not to startle Kurt, and succeeds in his task halfway. Kurt paws at the air, reaching for an invisible attacker between snores.
Finn gives him an incredulous look. “Are you serious? That’s not how these things work, man. Society is going to crumble. We will wander from one safe house to the next. Life as we know it will never be the same.” He grins. “It’s going to be awesome.”
Blaine ignores him in favor of switching on the television. Conveniently enough, a news broadcast is already in progress.
‘Rod Remington here reporting to you live from the aftermath of Lima, Ohio’s short lived zombie outbreak...’
“What?” Finn gasps. “No! That’s so unfair, it can’t be over yet. It just started!”
Blaine shares his sentiments for more practical reasons. “Tell me about it. I have a term paper due on Monday and I was hoping to get a few extra days on it.”
“Would you two keep it down?” Kurt mumbles, blindly tossing one of the couch cushions in Finn’s direction.
‘According to a recent poll, Lima, Ohio has the highest percentage of zombie film enthusiasts in the United States. I’m not sure why such a poll was ever conducted, but there you have it.’
“Are you fucking kidding me?” Finn screams, throwing his remote at the screen.
‘Had this outbreak happened in any other town, chances are they wouldn’t have been nearly as prepared as Lima. After the break, we will be interviewing the manager of the local movie store along with our local heroes, Rachel Berry and Quinn Fabray.’
“So what was that you were saying about society crumbling?” Blaine asks with a wide grin.
Finn wishes he hadn’t wasted the remote on the television set. Blaine’s stupid face looks much more tempting.
EPILOGUE
“I’m here with Finn Hudson, boyfriend of local hero Rachel Berry. Finn, how does it feel to be dating one of the lovely ladies who saved our town from destruction?”
Finn all but shoves the microphone into the interviewers face. If a chair had been present, he would have kicked it. “It’s sucks! Do you know where I was during the zombie outbreak?” He gives the interviewer no time to respond. “I was stuck in my basement with my stupid kid brother and his stupid boyfriend and his stupid eyebrows. Do you know how many zombies I would have killed?”
“We know, Finn,” Kurt coos and reaches over to pinch his cheek. “You would have been a regular zombie killing machine!”
Blaine bounds over waving his copy of People magazine. “Hey, you guys! Rachel signed my copy of People! I’m totally going to to eBay this bitch.” He shoves the magazine in Finn’s face. Quinn and Rachel are pictured in an intimidating pose wearing their zombie killing garb. The caption reads: ‘Ladykillers.’
“Now, Finn, we know it has been reported that you and Rachel are dating, but what can you tell us about the relationship between her and Miss Fabray?” the interviewer interrupts. “Tumblr wants to know.”