A Call to Fannish Arms
People. Friends of mine. We have trouble, right here in Buffy fandom.
This probably won't be easy to hear, but it's very necessary because we are in a crisis. Some people are doing Buffy fandom wrong.
I know, I know. It's shocking to think that some people don't recognize the beauty of Spike's arc or that they think the show should have ended after S3 or that they actually like As You Were.
They're out there, though, and they're claiming to be Buffy fans.
I know what you're thinking. How can these people be Buffy fans if they don't even pretend to care about the fabulous feminist metaphor of S7? And you're right. They aren't.
No, these people - who truly believe that AtS is the superior show - aren't Buffy fans, because the show they love just isn't Buffy. It's some warped version of the show that they've concocted in their minds. One that prefers Bangel to Spuffy and that thinks I Robot, You Jane is one of the finer Season 1 episodes.
Some of you may be saying: So what? Let them wallow in their delusions.
Simple fact is that we can't. Because non-viewers may come across these pseudo-fans and believe their twisted idea of the show. Non-viewers may start to think that the show jumped the shark when Buffy dove off the platform in S5. They may even be convinced that Becoming is a better episode than The Gift. Then their first impression of BtVS is tainted. They may go on to watch the show with blatantly wrong opinions...or they may decide not to watch the show at all upon being told how lame the rocket launcher scene in Him is.
Yes, it is that dire. These pseudo-fans destroy the integrity of the show we know and love, and God may kill a kitten every time they spread their false beliefs (I'm waiting to hear back from him on that).
So what do we do? Well, my right-thinking friends, I have a battle plan.
1. When you come across someone claiming to be a Buffy fan who espouses opinions and views contradictory to the One True View of the show, let them know they're wrong. Next time someone tells you they don't like Willow or Cordelia or Spike, tell them how wrong they are. We must preserve the integrity of this show.
2. Don't argue with them. Persuasion won't work with these pseudo-fans. You can debate all week, but they will never come around and admit that Maggie Walsh shouldn't have been killed in mid-S4. All you can do is let them know they're wrong.
3. Let them know that they're not true Buffy fans. This is important! We must keep the "Buffy fan" label for those who hold the correct views of the show. These pseudo-fans have to know that they don't actually like Buffy. They like some degraded view of the show that they've invented in their mind. Be merciless. They'll try to deny it. They'll try to say, "Each to their own" or "Different strokes" or "Agree to disagree" or some other bullshit. Don't let them! You have the might of the True View on your side.
4. Let others know they're not true fans. We must isolate these pseudo-fans and make it clear that we reject those who think Angel was the most interesting character in S2. Make it known to everybody that these people are but fringe crazies.
5. Finally, preach to the non-viewers. Let them know the Unwavering Tenets of Buffy Fandom before they watch the show. That way, they'll go in with the right ideas. During their initial viewing, if you notice them disliking Buffy or thinking that Adam is a pretty cool villain, gently let them know that they're wrong. Be their guide. Only this way can we created more fans with the correct way of viewing the series.
I know this is a lot of hard work. You may find people you formerly thought of as friends being exposed as pseudo-fans. Remember what's important, though: That Buffy fandom's purity is maintained. Dissenting views must be opposed and ostracized. People that hate S6 must be cast out. People that think the series is all about Xander should be bullied. People who have such a twisted grasp of reality that they don't even realize that the opinions they have on this show are just wrong. We can't let them take over our fandom. We can't let them taint the sanctity of our show anymore.
We have a tough job ahead, my fellow fans. We must all draw strength from thoughts of Spike's compact, yet well-muscled body to carry out this task. In the end, we'll find that ensuring everybody in fandom thinks exactly the same will be worth the effort.
Good luck.
This probably won't be easy to hear, but it's very necessary because we are in a crisis. Some people are doing Buffy fandom wrong.
I know, I know. It's shocking to think that some people don't recognize the beauty of Spike's arc or that they think the show should have ended after S3 or that they actually like As You Were.
They're out there, though, and they're claiming to be Buffy fans.
I know what you're thinking. How can these people be Buffy fans if they don't even pretend to care about the fabulous feminist metaphor of S7? And you're right. They aren't.
No, these people - who truly believe that AtS is the superior show - aren't Buffy fans, because the show they love just isn't Buffy. It's some warped version of the show that they've concocted in their minds. One that prefers Bangel to Spuffy and that thinks I Robot, You Jane is one of the finer Season 1 episodes.
Some of you may be saying: So what? Let them wallow in their delusions.
Simple fact is that we can't. Because non-viewers may come across these pseudo-fans and believe their twisted idea of the show. Non-viewers may start to think that the show jumped the shark when Buffy dove off the platform in S5. They may even be convinced that Becoming is a better episode than The Gift. Then their first impression of BtVS is tainted. They may go on to watch the show with blatantly wrong opinions...or they may decide not to watch the show at all upon being told how lame the rocket launcher scene in Him is.
Yes, it is that dire. These pseudo-fans destroy the integrity of the show we know and love, and God may kill a kitten every time they spread their false beliefs (I'm waiting to hear back from him on that).
So what do we do? Well, my right-thinking friends, I have a battle plan.
1. When you come across someone claiming to be a Buffy fan who espouses opinions and views contradictory to the One True View of the show, let them know they're wrong. Next time someone tells you they don't like Willow or Cordelia or Spike, tell them how wrong they are. We must preserve the integrity of this show.
2. Don't argue with them. Persuasion won't work with these pseudo-fans. You can debate all week, but they will never come around and admit that Maggie Walsh shouldn't have been killed in mid-S4. All you can do is let them know they're wrong.
3. Let them know that they're not true Buffy fans. This is important! We must keep the "Buffy fan" label for those who hold the correct views of the show. These pseudo-fans have to know that they don't actually like Buffy. They like some degraded view of the show that they've invented in their mind. Be merciless. They'll try to deny it. They'll try to say, "Each to their own" or "Different strokes" or "Agree to disagree" or some other bullshit. Don't let them! You have the might of the True View on your side.
4. Let others know they're not true fans. We must isolate these pseudo-fans and make it clear that we reject those who think Angel was the most interesting character in S2. Make it known to everybody that these people are but fringe crazies.
5. Finally, preach to the non-viewers. Let them know the Unwavering Tenets of Buffy Fandom before they watch the show. That way, they'll go in with the right ideas. During their initial viewing, if you notice them disliking Buffy or thinking that Adam is a pretty cool villain, gently let them know that they're wrong. Be their guide. Only this way can we created more fans with the correct way of viewing the series.
I know this is a lot of hard work. You may find people you formerly thought of as friends being exposed as pseudo-fans. Remember what's important, though: That Buffy fandom's purity is maintained. Dissenting views must be opposed and ostracized. People that hate S6 must be cast out. People that think the series is all about Xander should be bullied. People who have such a twisted grasp of reality that they don't even realize that the opinions they have on this show are just wrong. We can't let them take over our fandom. We can't let them taint the sanctity of our show anymore.
We have a tough job ahead, my fellow fans. We must all draw strength from thoughts of Spike's compact, yet well-muscled body to carry out this task. In the end, we'll find that ensuring everybody in fandom thinks exactly the same will be worth the effort.
Good luck.