Fic: Revelations, Memories, and Coke Zero
Author: on_the_ground
Title: Revelations, Memories, and Coke Zero
Rating: G
Pairing/s: Stiles/Jackson
Character/s: Stiles, Jackson
Summary: Stiles goes on a date with his husband after he comes out of the coma (Part II) (Part 22 was Part I)
Warnings: None
Submission Type: Fic
Word Count: 3650 words
Prompt: #176 - "Reunion"
Author's Notes: It's part 23 of my series "All I Saw Was You." It can be read as a standalone but you need to read first at least part 22.
"Umm... yes, this is really good," Stiles says, grabbing more spaghetti after trying it for the first time.
"I'm glad you like it. It's what you ordered the last time we came here so I figured that was the way to go," Jackson says as he cuts the steak with vegetables that he ordered.
Just then, he feels his cell phone buzzing inside the pocket of his jacket.
"It's Scott. It seems that Daniel and Andrea are making chocolate chip cookies for tomorrow and their kitchen is suffering the consequences... but they have it under control. They're ordering pizza."
Good luck tonight.
"Scott wishes us a good evening." Jackson puts the phone back into his pocket.
"Cookies and pizza." Stiles shakes his head. "I understand why he loves staying over there so much," Stiles says before drinking some of his Coke Zero.
"Yeah, I'm glad he's having fun. God knows he needs a break. He's not gonna miss us tonight, that's for sure."
"Did you talk to Derek about him?"
Jackson knows what Stiles means: if they talked about what they found out recently.
"No, not really. I mean, yesterday he texted me to check on me because he's that paranoid now, but I guess if he wants to tell me something else he will on Sunday's reunion when you're there, too."
"He's not being paranoid. You fucking scared him. He feels responsible, so he's worried."
Jackson understands that, but still, he's never liked people worrying about him.
"Well, whatever he has to say you need to hear it too and he knows that so... whatever... Besides, what do you expect him to say exactly?"
"I have no idea. Look, I don't know what I expected to happen before he was born, but you have to admit that being a parent is already difficult without having the wolf factor added to the mix, y'know? I'm not saying it's a problem or anything, but you have to admit that we need information and we're not gonna find it in the library."
"I must say, after what you told me at the clinic I thought you weren't worried. You seemed so calm about it."
"Calm?" Stiles snorts. "Seriously?"
"Okay, not calm, exactly, but confident. Like you got used to the idea."
"Jackson, you had just woken up from a freaking coma. The last thing I wanted was for you to freak out, too. Plus, I still believe what I said. I think... I know we can do this. I'm new at this and I'm doing the best I can, but I don't think you need a lot of experience to imagine that raising a kid is not the same as raising a..." Stiles looks around for a second, suddenly aware that they aren't alone. "You know..." Stiles says, waving his right arm. "I feel like we need to be prepared in case something happens, that's all."
"Of course we'll talk to him. We were not that clueless." Jackson frowns. "We knew the risks and maybe if he was different... I don't know... but these past couple of weeks, I look at him, talk to him, and it makes sense. And I don't think it's because I'm his father. He's the way he was meant to be and--"
"I never said he wasn't," Stiles interrupts him.
"I know, I know that. It's just..." Jackson licks his lips as he tries to find the words. "I know that when I woke up I had a moment of doubt, but now I've realized that it had more to do with my own fears and the way I am than they way he is, you know what I mean? The reason why I became a wolf has nothing to do with the reason why he's one." Jackson sets his fork on the table and takes a sip of water before he continues.
"The thing is that I love my parents and they raised me the best way they could, but I changed when they told me I was adopted, and there was nothing they could have done about it. Even if Daniel has things in common with me, thank god he's not going to be like me. He's going to be the way we raised him and sure, stuff will happen but like I said, he's not like me. He has a lot of friends, he's smart, he’s a good kid and he's got a good heart. That's why I think it's going to be okay. And I guess Derek feels the same way because he knows him."
"Yeah, Derek was not disappointed, I can tell you that. And if you ask me, he should have his own kids. What is he waiting for?" Stiles says before eating another mouthful of spaghetti.
Jackson smiles, wondering what Derek would say if he could hear them right now. "Have you asked him that?"
Stiles simply shakes his head as he chews.
"I don't know about Derek, but I know that Kane didn't want kids. His job has always been the most important. Maybe things have changed now." Jackson says.
The truth is that when Derek came to visit him, his parents and Derek were there too and they didn't have a conversation. They really need to catch up one day when they can be alone.
"Yeah, they aren't getting any younger," Stiles say before taking a sip of his Coke.
Jackson smiles before he can stop himself and tries to avoid looking at Stiles as he eats more of the roasted sweet peppers with eggplant.
That comment coming from this Stiles feels really weird to Jackson. It's like if Stiles was an adult all of a sudden and as much as he tries, the reality is that he isn't. He's not there yet and Jackson needs to remember that.
"They sure aren't. And adoption takes time. Maybe you should ask Kane on Sunday."
"Maybe I will." Stiles nods.
"I'm glad you two are friends again. He's a good guy."
"Yeah, me too. Did he tell you that I went to your firm a couple of months ago?"
"No, he didn't. We haven’t really had time to talk. Why did you go?" Jackson eats another bite of steak.
"Why do you think? I wanted to see where you worked. See if I remembered something."
Jackson sips some water. "But you didn't, right?"
"No, I didn't." Stiles can see that Jackson is not really disappointed because he imagines that by now he doesn't expect him to remember anything.
"But I talked to Kane for a while and you should know that he told me about the money." Stiles adds before eating more pasta.
"What money? You mean my will?" Jackson asks, raising his eyebrows. Somehow the idea of his husband seeing his will while he was unconscious never crossed his mind.
Stiles nods as he chews.
"You really thought I was going to die," Jackson realizes.
"Well, not exactly." Stiles licks his lips before using the napkin to be sure there's not tomato sauce somewhere around his mouth.
"It's true that I wanted to see where you work but the thing is that Kane texted me. He wanted to talk about your will which I only found out about when I got there. So it's not like I asked about it and it's not like Kane thought you were going to die either. But he thought it was something I should know about since you never bothered to tell me."
"That's not true, I told you about it when we got married."
"About the three million?"
"I told you, I've never lied to you... or hidden anything from you. But you've forgotten about it."
"But you never told me when I came out of the coma. All this time I've wondered why you didn't tell me anything. Or why you didn't tell me that you bought me a fucking house," Stiles retorts.
"That's not true. I recall telling you that you chose that house. I said you loved it, didn't I?"
"Yes, but that's not the same as saying that you paid for it... That you bought it for me."
"No, I bought it for us. Who cares if it was my money? What good is it having money if you don't use it when you need it?"
"Well, I do care, y'know? And it doesn't seem to me like we really needed such a big place." Stiles has survived all his life without a pool or a laundry room and he knows he can be perfectly happy without it.
Jackson snorts and closes his eyes for a second, shaking his head. He understands why Kane told him but he swears he could kill him right now if he was in front of him.
"I can't believe we are having this discussion once again," Jackson sighs. "You do realize that we’re on a date, right?"
"You told me not to think about it as date, remember?"
"Because I didn't want you to be nervous... not because I wanted to talk about my will or that time I bought us some place to live, which by the way is our fucking home."
"Excuse me if I don't know what is the appropriate topic for a date but this is my first one so you'll have to give me a pass," Stiles says waving his arms.
Jackson can feel Stiles getting nervous again and takes a deep breath before he continues and tries to get the conversation back on track.
"Look, I didn't mean that I don't want to talk about it, okay? It's just..." Jackson sighs unsure about the best way to say it.
"This is all behind us. Yeah, we got married and we needed a bigger place to live, and I bought a house that we both love, and we've been happy there. I never told you again because it didn't come up but it wasn't some big secret I wanted to keep from you. Because I told you, there are no secrets between us."
Stiles seems to be considering what Jackson said because he doesn't say anything for a few seconds.
"In that case you should know that Kane also showed me the letter. I mean, maybe you assumed he did, but in case you didn't, you know..." Stiles says faster than he intended.
"Of course, he did," Jackson frowns and licks his lips.
"Are you upset that he showed it to me?"
"No, it's not that. Kane is my attorney and I trust him. He had his reasons if he gave it to you."
"Then what?"
"Nothing. It's fine, really," Jackson says avoiding Stiles's eyes.
"Didn't you say that you never lie to me? I can see that you're not totally fine with it," Stiles insists.
But how does he explain how he feels? When he wrote that letter, Stiles still remembered him. Still loved him.
"I just..." Jackson tries to gather his thoughts. That letter was really personal. "That letter wasn't for you--"
"What?" Stiles interrupts him.
"Just let me finish," Jackson says. "What I'm trying to say is that yes, it was for you, but it was for you when you chose me to be your husband. Everything I say there is true and that's exactly how I still feel today, but after your accident and your amnesia, things changed and I should have made changes. Because I want you to be happy even if it's not with me, which I already told you when I woke up."
"Yeah, your famous freedom speech. I remember it, and I told you I'm not interested, how many times do I need to tell you? If I wasn't serious about it I wouldn't be here with you right now."
"Besides," Stiles continues, "I don't really see the difference. Like what? You didn't want me to be happy before? Isn't that a little selfish?"
"Yeah, well, I’m selfish. When it comes to you, I am but, believe it or not, you used to be too so we were even, y'know? I feel like I had the right to be that way, but after what happened to you I lost that right because you don't feel the same. It's not okay for me to expect the same. It wouldn't make any sense," Jackson says.
"I believe you. Kane told me that we weren't on good terms at first. He said that it was because he tried to kiss you."
Jackson rolls his eyes. "Stiles, that was a long time ago. Why the hell would he tell you about that?"
"It's not like that. He told me how we met and how we weren't friends at first. He was just being honest with me."
"Well, then you know that nothing happened but..." Jackson smiles, "you didn't trust him because I know that the idea of us getting together drove you insane... so yeah, sorry to break it to you but there was a time when you were jealous and selfish too."
But Jackson has no idea how Stiles is anymore. The only think he knows for sure is that his husband isn't in love with him and he wouldn't like him to be alone if something happened to him.
"So, you wouldn't mind if I got married again if something happened to you? Is that what you are saying?"
Jackson takes a sip of water as he thinks the best way to answer such an unexpected question.
"I would mind but I'd understand it. Of course, I would hate the idea of my kids having another dad... step-dad... or whatever, but I trust you to choose somebody who would be good to them and I trust Derek to kill him if he was not good to them or to you," Jackson says matter-of-factly.
"And honestly, you're lucky," Jackson smirks, "if I wasn't married to you, I think your date would be ditching you just about now."
Jackson smiles when he sees Stiles's offended expression. "Death and old crushes are real mood killers, y'know?"
Stiles just looks at him and doesn't say anything for a few seconds and Jackson isn’t sure what Stiles is actually thinking about. Maybe that wasn't the best thing to say in this situation after all, even if he was joking.
"Yeah, maybe you're right," Stiles finally says. "What if I said that I have remembered some stuff, is that like more date material?"
Jackson is not sure if he's heard correctly at first because that is the last thing he expected to hear from Stiles. Somehow he was sure that Stiles would never recover any memory.
"Wait, what? What stuff? What are you talking about?" Jackson asks, raising his eyebrows, food and drinks obviously forgotten.
"When I was sleeping at my father's, after you fainted, I remembered when we were kidnapped," Stiles says, unsure how to say it exactly, afraid of Jackson's reaction.
"The kidnapping, that's what you remembered? Like everything that happened? Are you sure it wasn't just a dream? Maybe I shouldn't have told you anything about it. I told you you didn't need to know--"
"It wasn't a dream," Stiles interrupts him. "I know it wasn't. It was real. It was a memory. And you didn't tell me shit. I know that now. I know you were trying to protect me but you should have told me what really happened. How they tortured you, and how you helped me, protected me. I know I'd be dead right now if you hadn't been there--"
"We don't know that," Jackson says, frowning, "maybe I helped you but you're strong and I only did what anybody in that situation would have done. Besides, your father would have killed me if I had let you die. We weren't really friends when that happened."
"I know. That's why you'd have told me. It shows that you did what you had to do. And I said some pretty nasty things about you, back in the day, I mean."
Jackson snorts. "I probably deserved it. I had a restraining order against you after all. I never gave you a chance. I hurt Lydia and my parents. We all did things we regret. You shouldn't think about the past."
"So, you never think about it... about the past."
Jackson is silent for a moment. He looks around him at the couples in the other tables. Everybody looks happy, probably talking about their lives, it just feels so normal. It feels like they’re like everybody else. Nobody pays attention to them and it just feels good to be in a normal situation again, with no drama, no hospitals, no kids, no parents and no pack. Just Stiles and him.
"No, I try not to." Jackson closes his eyes for a second and shakes his head. "Everything before we got together was such a mess. My childhood was complicated, Lydia and me were complicated, then the kanima was a total mess, the Esiban episode was hell... so, if I remember the past, I think about everything after that."
"Like when you asked me to marry you?"
"Yeah." Jackson nods. "That was a pretty good day."
"I know, I remembered it too," Stiles says in a nonchalant way.
"Do you remember it?" Jackson frowns. "Are you sure? Are your memories back and you didn't tell me?" Jackson isn’t sure he understands what is going on.
"I wish... No, nothing like that. I only have three memories. Before I came home I remembered when we decided to tell people about us. Like in my room, y'know..." Stiles says before having another sip of Coke Zero, avoiding Jackson's eyes.
"But, how? I mean, you remember details? Our conversation? How is that possible?" Jackson asks, obviously confused.
"Yeah, lots of details. I know what you told me and I know what I told you. And I have no idea why. The doctors said I might not remember anything, so I guess I should consider myself lucky to remember that."
"Are you..." Stiles licks his lips, "I mean, are you happy that I remember something?"
"Am I happy?" Jackson snorts. What kind of question is that. "What do you think? Of course, I'm fucking happy." Jackson smiles. "I want you to have your life back. I want you to be happy. And I want Daniel to be happy. Why didn't you tell me all this before? Why did you wait so long?"
"The truth is I haven't told anybody, except for Kane and my father who only knows about the kidnapping. I didn't want people to get their hopes up and I think it was the right thing to do because I haven't remembered anything else. And then, when you woke up, I was waiting for the right time. I wasn't sure how you'd take it."
"How did you think I would take it? The day we got engaged was one the happiest days of my life and telling the pack about us was the first important decision we made together. Maybe that's why you might have remembered them. They were important moments."
Stiles thinks about it for a second like he has so many times before. At first he was hoping to get more memories back but now, he doesn't know what to think anymore.
"When you proposed, you said this was the life you were supposed to live, and, I mean, after everything that's happened... do you still think that?" Stiles remembers.
"I still can't believe you remember that." Jackson smiles. It feels so surreal.
"Of course, why wouldn't I? I told you shit would happen. But we've had a good life and I wouldn't change it for anything. You didn't die in that accident and I'm still here too. All things considered, we're still here. And we got a second chance, I don't need anything else," Jackson says with sincerity.
"And, by the way, I got you something," Jackson says, taking a package out from his pocket and leaving in front of Stiles, next to his plate.
"You got me something?" Stiles says, raising his eyebrows. "Why?" Stiles grabs it and unwraps it with excitement and curiosity.
"I wanted you to have it back," Jackson says simply.
With the paper out of the way, Stiles can see a black box with the word OMEGA at the top. When he opens it there's a watch. It is silver and black but the 12, 6 and 9 are orange like the first fifteen minutes of the border around the face and the border of the black strap. It's casual but also modern and elegant at the same time. Stiles automatically loves it.
"Wow, you bought me a watch?" Stiles says quite shocked.
"Yeah, I actually bought it for your birthday last year. It was damaged in the accident. I knew that if you could remember it, you'd be sad about it. And I missed seeing you wearing it too. You like it?"
"Like it? I love it," Stiles says, smiling. It's one of the best presents he's ever had, but then again, he doesn't remember any other present and probably they were as good as this one.
"It's so cool. Thank you." Stiles's right hand moves forward on the table until it finds Jackson's and caresses it with his fingers.
The contact takes Jackson by surprise. He's still not used to Stiles randomly touching him, even if it has happened different times during these two weeks. He's not sure if it’s something Stiles is doing consciously or not.
He looks at their hands and, as his fingers touch Stiles's, he can feel his wolf howl with content, and he can feel his own heart beating faster too. Times like this he remembers how much he's missed this feeling and how much he wants it back.
Title: Revelations, Memories, and Coke Zero
Rating: G
Pairing/s: Stiles/Jackson
Character/s: Stiles, Jackson
Summary: Stiles goes on a date with his husband after he comes out of the coma (Part II) (Part 22 was Part I)
Warnings: None
Submission Type: Fic
Word Count: 3650 words
Prompt: #176 - "Reunion"
Author's Notes: It's part 23 of my series "All I Saw Was You." It can be read as a standalone but you need to read first at least part 22.
"Umm... yes, this is really good," Stiles says, grabbing more spaghetti after trying it for the first time.
"I'm glad you like it. It's what you ordered the last time we came here so I figured that was the way to go," Jackson says as he cuts the steak with vegetables that he ordered.
Just then, he feels his cell phone buzzing inside the pocket of his jacket.
"It's Scott. It seems that Daniel and Andrea are making chocolate chip cookies for tomorrow and their kitchen is suffering the consequences... but they have it under control. They're ordering pizza."
Good luck tonight.
"Scott wishes us a good evening." Jackson puts the phone back into his pocket.
"Cookies and pizza." Stiles shakes his head. "I understand why he loves staying over there so much," Stiles says before drinking some of his Coke Zero.
"Yeah, I'm glad he's having fun. God knows he needs a break. He's not gonna miss us tonight, that's for sure."
"Did you talk to Derek about him?"
Jackson knows what Stiles means: if they talked about what they found out recently.
"No, not really. I mean, yesterday he texted me to check on me because he's that paranoid now, but I guess if he wants to tell me something else he will on Sunday's reunion when you're there, too."
"He's not being paranoid. You fucking scared him. He feels responsible, so he's worried."
Jackson understands that, but still, he's never liked people worrying about him.
"Well, whatever he has to say you need to hear it too and he knows that so... whatever... Besides, what do you expect him to say exactly?"
"I have no idea. Look, I don't know what I expected to happen before he was born, but you have to admit that being a parent is already difficult without having the wolf factor added to the mix, y'know? I'm not saying it's a problem or anything, but you have to admit that we need information and we're not gonna find it in the library."
"I must say, after what you told me at the clinic I thought you weren't worried. You seemed so calm about it."
"Calm?" Stiles snorts. "Seriously?"
"Okay, not calm, exactly, but confident. Like you got used to the idea."
"Jackson, you had just woken up from a freaking coma. The last thing I wanted was for you to freak out, too. Plus, I still believe what I said. I think... I know we can do this. I'm new at this and I'm doing the best I can, but I don't think you need a lot of experience to imagine that raising a kid is not the same as raising a..." Stiles looks around for a second, suddenly aware that they aren't alone. "You know..." Stiles says, waving his right arm. "I feel like we need to be prepared in case something happens, that's all."
"Of course we'll talk to him. We were not that clueless." Jackson frowns. "We knew the risks and maybe if he was different... I don't know... but these past couple of weeks, I look at him, talk to him, and it makes sense. And I don't think it's because I'm his father. He's the way he was meant to be and--"
"I never said he wasn't," Stiles interrupts him.
"I know, I know that. It's just..." Jackson licks his lips as he tries to find the words. "I know that when I woke up I had a moment of doubt, but now I've realized that it had more to do with my own fears and the way I am than they way he is, you know what I mean? The reason why I became a wolf has nothing to do with the reason why he's one." Jackson sets his fork on the table and takes a sip of water before he continues.
"The thing is that I love my parents and they raised me the best way they could, but I changed when they told me I was adopted, and there was nothing they could have done about it. Even if Daniel has things in common with me, thank god he's not going to be like me. He's going to be the way we raised him and sure, stuff will happen but like I said, he's not like me. He has a lot of friends, he's smart, he’s a good kid and he's got a good heart. That's why I think it's going to be okay. And I guess Derek feels the same way because he knows him."
"Yeah, Derek was not disappointed, I can tell you that. And if you ask me, he should have his own kids. What is he waiting for?" Stiles says before eating another mouthful of spaghetti.
Jackson smiles, wondering what Derek would say if he could hear them right now. "Have you asked him that?"
Stiles simply shakes his head as he chews.
"I don't know about Derek, but I know that Kane didn't want kids. His job has always been the most important. Maybe things have changed now." Jackson says.
The truth is that when Derek came to visit him, his parents and Derek were there too and they didn't have a conversation. They really need to catch up one day when they can be alone.
"Yeah, they aren't getting any younger," Stiles say before taking a sip of his Coke.
Jackson smiles before he can stop himself and tries to avoid looking at Stiles as he eats more of the roasted sweet peppers with eggplant.
That comment coming from this Stiles feels really weird to Jackson. It's like if Stiles was an adult all of a sudden and as much as he tries, the reality is that he isn't. He's not there yet and Jackson needs to remember that.
"They sure aren't. And adoption takes time. Maybe you should ask Kane on Sunday."
"Maybe I will." Stiles nods.
"I'm glad you two are friends again. He's a good guy."
"Yeah, me too. Did he tell you that I went to your firm a couple of months ago?"
"No, he didn't. We haven’t really had time to talk. Why did you go?" Jackson eats another bite of steak.
"Why do you think? I wanted to see where you worked. See if I remembered something."
Jackson sips some water. "But you didn't, right?"
"No, I didn't." Stiles can see that Jackson is not really disappointed because he imagines that by now he doesn't expect him to remember anything.
"But I talked to Kane for a while and you should know that he told me about the money." Stiles adds before eating more pasta.
"What money? You mean my will?" Jackson asks, raising his eyebrows. Somehow the idea of his husband seeing his will while he was unconscious never crossed his mind.
Stiles nods as he chews.
"You really thought I was going to die," Jackson realizes.
"Well, not exactly." Stiles licks his lips before using the napkin to be sure there's not tomato sauce somewhere around his mouth.
"It's true that I wanted to see where you work but the thing is that Kane texted me. He wanted to talk about your will which I only found out about when I got there. So it's not like I asked about it and it's not like Kane thought you were going to die either. But he thought it was something I should know about since you never bothered to tell me."
"That's not true, I told you about it when we got married."
"About the three million?"
"I told you, I've never lied to you... or hidden anything from you. But you've forgotten about it."
"But you never told me when I came out of the coma. All this time I've wondered why you didn't tell me anything. Or why you didn't tell me that you bought me a fucking house," Stiles retorts.
"That's not true. I recall telling you that you chose that house. I said you loved it, didn't I?"
"Yes, but that's not the same as saying that you paid for it... That you bought it for me."
"No, I bought it for us. Who cares if it was my money? What good is it having money if you don't use it when you need it?"
"Well, I do care, y'know? And it doesn't seem to me like we really needed such a big place." Stiles has survived all his life without a pool or a laundry room and he knows he can be perfectly happy without it.
Jackson snorts and closes his eyes for a second, shaking his head. He understands why Kane told him but he swears he could kill him right now if he was in front of him.
"I can't believe we are having this discussion once again," Jackson sighs. "You do realize that we’re on a date, right?"
"You told me not to think about it as date, remember?"
"Because I didn't want you to be nervous... not because I wanted to talk about my will or that time I bought us some place to live, which by the way is our fucking home."
"Excuse me if I don't know what is the appropriate topic for a date but this is my first one so you'll have to give me a pass," Stiles says waving his arms.
Jackson can feel Stiles getting nervous again and takes a deep breath before he continues and tries to get the conversation back on track.
"Look, I didn't mean that I don't want to talk about it, okay? It's just..." Jackson sighs unsure about the best way to say it.
"This is all behind us. Yeah, we got married and we needed a bigger place to live, and I bought a house that we both love, and we've been happy there. I never told you again because it didn't come up but it wasn't some big secret I wanted to keep from you. Because I told you, there are no secrets between us."
Stiles seems to be considering what Jackson said because he doesn't say anything for a few seconds.
"In that case you should know that Kane also showed me the letter. I mean, maybe you assumed he did, but in case you didn't, you know..." Stiles says faster than he intended.
"Of course, he did," Jackson frowns and licks his lips.
"Are you upset that he showed it to me?"
"No, it's not that. Kane is my attorney and I trust him. He had his reasons if he gave it to you."
"Then what?"
"Nothing. It's fine, really," Jackson says avoiding Stiles's eyes.
"Didn't you say that you never lie to me? I can see that you're not totally fine with it," Stiles insists.
But how does he explain how he feels? When he wrote that letter, Stiles still remembered him. Still loved him.
"I just..." Jackson tries to gather his thoughts. That letter was really personal. "That letter wasn't for you--"
"What?" Stiles interrupts him.
"Just let me finish," Jackson says. "What I'm trying to say is that yes, it was for you, but it was for you when you chose me to be your husband. Everything I say there is true and that's exactly how I still feel today, but after your accident and your amnesia, things changed and I should have made changes. Because I want you to be happy even if it's not with me, which I already told you when I woke up."
"Yeah, your famous freedom speech. I remember it, and I told you I'm not interested, how many times do I need to tell you? If I wasn't serious about it I wouldn't be here with you right now."
"Besides," Stiles continues, "I don't really see the difference. Like what? You didn't want me to be happy before? Isn't that a little selfish?"
"Yeah, well, I’m selfish. When it comes to you, I am but, believe it or not, you used to be too so we were even, y'know? I feel like I had the right to be that way, but after what happened to you I lost that right because you don't feel the same. It's not okay for me to expect the same. It wouldn't make any sense," Jackson says.
"I believe you. Kane told me that we weren't on good terms at first. He said that it was because he tried to kiss you."
Jackson rolls his eyes. "Stiles, that was a long time ago. Why the hell would he tell you about that?"
"It's not like that. He told me how we met and how we weren't friends at first. He was just being honest with me."
"Well, then you know that nothing happened but..." Jackson smiles, "you didn't trust him because I know that the idea of us getting together drove you insane... so yeah, sorry to break it to you but there was a time when you were jealous and selfish too."
But Jackson has no idea how Stiles is anymore. The only think he knows for sure is that his husband isn't in love with him and he wouldn't like him to be alone if something happened to him.
"So, you wouldn't mind if I got married again if something happened to you? Is that what you are saying?"
Jackson takes a sip of water as he thinks the best way to answer such an unexpected question.
"I would mind but I'd understand it. Of course, I would hate the idea of my kids having another dad... step-dad... or whatever, but I trust you to choose somebody who would be good to them and I trust Derek to kill him if he was not good to them or to you," Jackson says matter-of-factly.
"And honestly, you're lucky," Jackson smirks, "if I wasn't married to you, I think your date would be ditching you just about now."
Jackson smiles when he sees Stiles's offended expression. "Death and old crushes are real mood killers, y'know?"
Stiles just looks at him and doesn't say anything for a few seconds and Jackson isn’t sure what Stiles is actually thinking about. Maybe that wasn't the best thing to say in this situation after all, even if he was joking.
"Yeah, maybe you're right," Stiles finally says. "What if I said that I have remembered some stuff, is that like more date material?"
Jackson is not sure if he's heard correctly at first because that is the last thing he expected to hear from Stiles. Somehow he was sure that Stiles would never recover any memory.
"Wait, what? What stuff? What are you talking about?" Jackson asks, raising his eyebrows, food and drinks obviously forgotten.
"When I was sleeping at my father's, after you fainted, I remembered when we were kidnapped," Stiles says, unsure how to say it exactly, afraid of Jackson's reaction.
"The kidnapping, that's what you remembered? Like everything that happened? Are you sure it wasn't just a dream? Maybe I shouldn't have told you anything about it. I told you you didn't need to know--"
"It wasn't a dream," Stiles interrupts him. "I know it wasn't. It was real. It was a memory. And you didn't tell me shit. I know that now. I know you were trying to protect me but you should have told me what really happened. How they tortured you, and how you helped me, protected me. I know I'd be dead right now if you hadn't been there--"
"We don't know that," Jackson says, frowning, "maybe I helped you but you're strong and I only did what anybody in that situation would have done. Besides, your father would have killed me if I had let you die. We weren't really friends when that happened."
"I know. That's why you'd have told me. It shows that you did what you had to do. And I said some pretty nasty things about you, back in the day, I mean."
Jackson snorts. "I probably deserved it. I had a restraining order against you after all. I never gave you a chance. I hurt Lydia and my parents. We all did things we regret. You shouldn't think about the past."
"So, you never think about it... about the past."
Jackson is silent for a moment. He looks around him at the couples in the other tables. Everybody looks happy, probably talking about their lives, it just feels so normal. It feels like they’re like everybody else. Nobody pays attention to them and it just feels good to be in a normal situation again, with no drama, no hospitals, no kids, no parents and no pack. Just Stiles and him.
"No, I try not to." Jackson closes his eyes for a second and shakes his head. "Everything before we got together was such a mess. My childhood was complicated, Lydia and me were complicated, then the kanima was a total mess, the Esiban episode was hell... so, if I remember the past, I think about everything after that."
"Like when you asked me to marry you?"
"Yeah." Jackson nods. "That was a pretty good day."
"I know, I remembered it too," Stiles says in a nonchalant way.
"Do you remember it?" Jackson frowns. "Are you sure? Are your memories back and you didn't tell me?" Jackson isn’t sure he understands what is going on.
"I wish... No, nothing like that. I only have three memories. Before I came home I remembered when we decided to tell people about us. Like in my room, y'know..." Stiles says before having another sip of Coke Zero, avoiding Jackson's eyes.
"But, how? I mean, you remember details? Our conversation? How is that possible?" Jackson asks, obviously confused.
"Yeah, lots of details. I know what you told me and I know what I told you. And I have no idea why. The doctors said I might not remember anything, so I guess I should consider myself lucky to remember that."
"Are you..." Stiles licks his lips, "I mean, are you happy that I remember something?"
"Am I happy?" Jackson snorts. What kind of question is that. "What do you think? Of course, I'm fucking happy." Jackson smiles. "I want you to have your life back. I want you to be happy. And I want Daniel to be happy. Why didn't you tell me all this before? Why did you wait so long?"
"The truth is I haven't told anybody, except for Kane and my father who only knows about the kidnapping. I didn't want people to get their hopes up and I think it was the right thing to do because I haven't remembered anything else. And then, when you woke up, I was waiting for the right time. I wasn't sure how you'd take it."
"How did you think I would take it? The day we got engaged was one the happiest days of my life and telling the pack about us was the first important decision we made together. Maybe that's why you might have remembered them. They were important moments."
Stiles thinks about it for a second like he has so many times before. At first he was hoping to get more memories back but now, he doesn't know what to think anymore.
"When you proposed, you said this was the life you were supposed to live, and, I mean, after everything that's happened... do you still think that?" Stiles remembers.
"I still can't believe you remember that." Jackson smiles. It feels so surreal.
"Of course, why wouldn't I? I told you shit would happen. But we've had a good life and I wouldn't change it for anything. You didn't die in that accident and I'm still here too. All things considered, we're still here. And we got a second chance, I don't need anything else," Jackson says with sincerity.
"And, by the way, I got you something," Jackson says, taking a package out from his pocket and leaving in front of Stiles, next to his plate.
"You got me something?" Stiles says, raising his eyebrows. "Why?" Stiles grabs it and unwraps it with excitement and curiosity.
"I wanted you to have it back," Jackson says simply.
With the paper out of the way, Stiles can see a black box with the word OMEGA at the top. When he opens it there's a watch. It is silver and black but the 12, 6 and 9 are orange like the first fifteen minutes of the border around the face and the border of the black strap. It's casual but also modern and elegant at the same time. Stiles automatically loves it.
"Wow, you bought me a watch?" Stiles says quite shocked.
"Yeah, I actually bought it for your birthday last year. It was damaged in the accident. I knew that if you could remember it, you'd be sad about it. And I missed seeing you wearing it too. You like it?"
"Like it? I love it," Stiles says, smiling. It's one of the best presents he's ever had, but then again, he doesn't remember any other present and probably they were as good as this one.
"It's so cool. Thank you." Stiles's right hand moves forward on the table until it finds Jackson's and caresses it with his fingers.
The contact takes Jackson by surprise. He's still not used to Stiles randomly touching him, even if it has happened different times during these two weeks. He's not sure if it’s something Stiles is doing consciously or not.
He looks at their hands and, as his fingers touch Stiles's, he can feel his wolf howl with content, and he can feel his own heart beating faster too. Times like this he remembers how much he's missed this feeling and how much he wants it back.