Jealous (Chapter 5)
Title: Jealous (Chapter:5)
Pairing: RinTaro
Author: fujikawarinfr
Genre: Romance, Angst(?)
AN: - I don't own HSJ's member.
-i'm sorry if there're grammatically wrong
please read Chapter1, Chapter2 , Chapter3 and Chapter4 before you read this chapter
I HATE MONDAY.... Everybody hates Monday... Well, at least that phrase has been announced everywhere in this whole wide world. But in my case right now, I hate Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and today. Yeah, it's Wednesday already, and I haven't talked to Ryu yet since that horrible Saturday night call. Ever since he came home, we haven't talked or even met, except at school. It's not counted as 'meet' actually, because all that we did was just glancing, eyes-corner seeing, peeping, looking, staring, etc, etc, etc. There were a few times when he tried to talk to me, but there were many people around, and I was also not in the mood to talk, so I just walked away from him, or passed him. He looked miserable, I'm sorry for that. But I also couldn't hide my sadness. I don't want to be a girl who is smiling over a pain, not this time. I make myself busy with all the school work and many excuses. Homework, projects, quizzes that I don't have, exam that's still 2 months away and Keito's tutorial. Just to avoid him, until his minds is clear. Or.... Mine... I don't know...
"Hey.. Where's my dictionary?" I'm preparing all that I need for my next lesson. I've been digging deeply into my locker, but couldn't find it.
"Where the heck is it?? Oh nooo... It's in my drawer!!" I brought it home yesterday for English homework and I forgot to bring it back to school again. Aahh!! I should buy another one for home usage. Regretting my foolishness, I close the locker door.
"Rin.."
"OMG!! Are you crazy? You scared me, Ryu!!" I was surprised by his presence beside me. How long has he been there?
"Yes, I am crazy. I can't stand with this situation anymore, not seeing you nor talking with you. Sorry, didn't mean to scare you."
"Ohh.. Sorry, I didn't have much times, in fact right now I must see Kei to discuss about the science experiment quiz. I must get going. See you around."
"Wait!!" He blocked my way. The student next to me is looking.
"We must set the experiment schedule fast." He suddenly changed the conversation into 'school language' mode. We do this way of talking when there are people around, so they wouldn't notice that we're dating. It blurs our relationship with school buddies only. "We have to talk," he added with a lower voice.
"Talk about what?" "I can't right now.” "I also have another project to discuss with my team."
I start walking and he follows beside me.
He grabs my elbow. "Kei can wait, I'll talk to him." His eyes are demanding. "You must come with me to the principal's office." A junior student passed and gave a suspicious look at me.
Whaaatt?? Principal's office?? Please find a better sentence, Ryu.
"Okay, we'll talk after school." I whispered.
"Hey, my I borrow your dictionary?" Another junior passed us.
"We must talk right now. You'll find another excuse to avoid me later."
"Do you still keep your history last semester note? I need the Ancient Egypt part." My classmates greeted me.
"Ohh that note?! I think I still have it. I'll search it when we're home." I stressed the 'when we're
home' part.
"No! Must be right now." He stopped walking and pushed me to wall.
"What do we need to talk about??" I gave up. "I'm sure Math will not trouble you at all."
"Math is quite difficult sometimes. About us... " He's lowering his voice again.
"I guess my message to you was clear enough to understand. And obvioulsy, your mind isn't clear yet. Don't forget to make the table and graph of the function, or else the score will be minus."
"I perfectly have understood of it. Yeah, I always forget about the graph. I know I was over-reacted. Bar graph or line?"
"Yes, you were. And you didn't trust me. That's the problem. Line graph is better, you can see the decreasing or increasing progress easily."
"Ryu... Do you know what love is?" I asked him.
I look at his eyes and continue,
"In math: A problem. In history: A war. In chemistry: A reaction. In art: A heart." I stop and low down my voice so it will be only us who could listen, " In me: You..."
I just told him that I love him. That's my true feeling about him. His eyes are softening, but my eyes are blurred of tears that I try to hide. I cast his hand over my elbow, and leave him. I hope these tears won't drop. Please... I don't want anyone see this. I can see Shintaro was standing in front of our class, smiled at me. As my close friend, maybe he proud of me because I could tell my feeling to the one that I love
Suddenly, Ryu's hand grabs mine and drags me away from my path. He walks, half-running, and I just follow him. I don't have strength to reject anymore. My legs are obeying his will. I drop my books. Shintaro know what should he do now. Tell teacher that I went to health center or something like that. He's taking me out of the crowd, out of building, out of the gate, out of school.
We keep walking and enter the park, our park, and stop by the pond.
The hand that was holding me is tightening. The other arm is surrounding my body. Ryu is hugging me, but I can't see it because my eyes are flooding.
"I'm sorry, Rin. I've hurt you just because of a stupid jealousy. I should've trusted you. I should've known you better than anyone."
My tears couldn't stop dropping. I hide in his arms.
"I know that I'm selfish, wanting you only for me. But I should've known that you've given your heart to me, and so my selfishness is already fulfilled."
He's loosened his hug and looks at me as I do the same. I can see his soft eyes now; he has wiped all the tears away.
"Any man can love a million girls, but it takes a real man to love only one girl, a million ways," he said. "Thank you for being that girl. Please, let me be that man."
He bends over, and kisses me.
The rock in my heart is melted. My disappointment is swept. The hole in my chess is covered.
Dear diary, I'm falling deeper.....
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(c) fujikawarinfr
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