Abridged, Part One [Prince of Tennis: Yanagi, Yukimura, Sanada, Inui]
title: Abridged, Part One.
characters: Yanagi, Yukimura, Sanada, Inui.
inspiration: Prompts from here, more specifically:
50_darkfics (63) - Masterpiece, 100_leitmotifs (73) - the sum of its parts, and 100_leitmotifs (90) - oubliette.
notes: 2330 words. Cathryn read it over for me and insisted it can stand as it is. And though I usually hate the way I end things and rush them and stuff, it's weird to end it like this. I'll probably add to it at some point.
-
Everyone else comes neatly wrapped in little boxes. Akaya's, Yanagi decides in a moment of whimsy, has a blue ribbon, while Genichirou's is red.
He knows their statistics inside-out, and even more so, he knows how they will react in any given situation. For example, he had predicted that should anything ever happen to their captain in the middle of school to cause distress, Niou would be surprisingly level-headed and methodical, because his mind was sharp and his instincts were perfect, Marui would freeze up, possibly faint if there was blood to be seen, for all his brash talk. Sanada and Kirihara would lose control of their emotions completely and degenerate from yelling to nearly coming to blows in a silent fight over who cared more. And Yanagi also knew his position would be between them, a human blockade for hot-tempers while Yagyuu took up the seat he wished himself to be in; at Yukimura's side attempting to get a reaction.
One thing he does not forsee in the scenario, however, are the first words out of Yukimura's mouth during his and Genichirou's fourth visit; the first in which Yukimura is not sleeping.
"Don't visit me again." He says without looking at either of them. Sanada's response is instantaneous, jumping up and opening his mouth to say something with an anger akin to the fire in his eyes. Yanagi stops him with a firm hand wrapping around Sanada's arm before he can speak. It was agiven that Sanada would not take rejection well; his haggard appearance, the worry line in his forehead, the constant if not literal biting of his lip to keep from saying something irretrievable to Kirihara.
Sanada also knows that Renji will have thought deeper on the words, in the seconds they have been given to process them. He often defers to Yanagi in moments when his emotions threaten to engulf him completely. He closes his mouth again, lips pressing together more tightly than they need to, nods though Yukimura cannot see it, and strides away out of the door.
Yanagi does not speak out after Sanada, simply follows him without looking back. He had not realised Yukimura's pride was so high.
"All that arguing to be allowed in to see him," Sanada says blankly, "a total waste of time. Does he never stop to think that rejection actually hurts?"
Yanagi raises an eyebrow; he had suspected Genichirou's feelings for a long time, but never noticed the point at which he had acted upon them. Gaps within Sanada's data do not last long, however. He tells Renji practically everything.
"I don't believe Seiichi has ever experienced a rejection," he says lightly, but carefully. "So in answer to your question... Perhaps not."
Sanada turns to look at him with the kind of surprise in his face he usually receives after having slapped someone.
"Renji," he says, wanting to sigh, his voice revealing a waver. "What's going on?"
"Genichirou," Yanagi says, and stops. Sanada looks ready to collapse himself, or cry. "Let's get some coffee and I'll explain."
Yanagi vetoes the idea of vending machine coffee, or taking up valuable waiting seats in the hospital reception, and they go to a diner. Sanada ignores his coffee but stares at it longingly, letting Yanagi speak to the waitress and smile politely until she gets the hint and leaves them to it.
"Say you were to collapse in the middle of school," he begins conversationally, trying not to notice the way Sanada's forehead develops deeper lines as he relives the moment. "And you woke up to find Yukimura sitting at your beside, holding your hand. You, I think, probably would not mind that so much. If I happened to be there also, I think you would be accepting of it. But Niou grinning over your bed? Kirihara sitting sullenly, Jackal with concerned eyes..."
"Don't go on." Sanada says.
"Exactly." Yanagi nods. "You would not want them to see you incapacitated. You are the one who usually gives them orders, and discipline. To see you in such a state would undermine your authority with them."
"I understand that much, then." Sanada nods. "But I would make the exception for the two of you!"
His voice cracks on the last word, and Yanagi is almost ashamed at himself and the way he makes a careful note of how it is to see Sanada on the verge of losing faith completely. Almost.
"This is where you differ," he says, curling fingers back around his cup to test the warmth of it again before lifting it to his mouth. "You are not afraid to admit, even if it is only to Seiichi or myself, that there are areas in which you are out of your depth. You rely on us at times, making it, for you, a balance of equals. Apparently, Seiichi has decided that he must be a source of strength not just as captain of the team, but as our friends also. I admit I have also laid problems of my own at his doorstep once or twice. But you don't tend to think that..." Yanagi stops before his own voice can betray him. He does not want to lay himself as bare as Sanada does. He breathes. Sanada is hanging on his words. "That once or twice will lead to such an alignment of dynamics. He does not want us to see him in a moment of weakness, lest we lose all faith in him to be able to support us. He is trying to do what is best."
"He's being an idiot." Sanada says firmly. "And I'll tell him so if I have to. He can't just shut us out like this! If nothing else, you said it yourself, we are his friends."
"Put it that way, and you'll never make him understand." Yanagi says firmly. "Because that is the reason he is pushing us away. Perhaps if we just give him some time..."
Sanada frowns, looking ready to march straight back to the hospital and yell at Yukimura like he was the freshman who forgot to tie the end of the net to the post last week and then lied about it when it collapsed right in front of him. He is jiggling his leg under the table.
"Genichirou." Yanagi says in a tone he saves for very few. "Give me just a little time, and I will think of something. For all our sakes."
Sanada nods reluctantly, and begins to tap his fingers on the table. Yanagi swats at them sharply.
"Go home." He says, and smiles to himself at how much he sounds like he is ordering Sanada around. "Call someone, get out, play a match. I believe Atobe Keigo might be a suitable opponent for your mood."
Sanada scowls, offering up a black look that wishes to defy the possibility that Atobe Keigo could provide him with anything. Yanagi knows that just means he will do it, and it will suffice, for now.
Three days later, Yanagi has a plan.
He slips into Yukimura's room as quietly as possible, though he knows that since Yukimura is not looking towards the door, he has no way of knowing it isn't just another doctor come to check him over. He is on his side again, facing the window and looking out at the callous sun, still managing to shine down brightly on everything when for so many the world is cracked.
Time stands still for a while. For once Yanagi has no concept of how long it's been before he speaks. It comes out even more sudden and awkward than he intended, the weight of his words warping his tongue.
"Sadaharu sent me a blank email again last night." He says, and it's not a lie, because he asked Inui to do it just for that reason. Yukimura twitches noticably, jerks his head around as though to confirm Yanagi is really there before he uses his weight to throw himself onto his back in his bed. Yanagi dies a little inside watching the way Yukimura has already adjusted to a lack of grace or control. He is strong.
"Want to talk about it?" Yukimura asks, and his voice is barely-there and scratchy, but his tiny smile is promising, so Yanagi nods and sits down on the bed, noting that there are no longer any chairs in Yukimura's room at all. For a while, it's just like old times.
The next time Yanagi visits, he tests his theory by reversing his tactics.
"How are you feeling today?" He asks in a tone that rivals the best, or worst, of doctors.
"Get out." Yukimura says.
Yanagi starts a notebook that day, writes down his first unfailing fact in dealing with Yukimura while he is bed-ridden. He then composes an email to Inui that reads;
I understand now the advantages to having certain data noted down on paper. Having something tangible to look back upon gives a vast sense of accomplishment, even if you have not learnt all that much.
Renji, Inui writes in reply, and even though it's typed it seems hasty. Who are you rewriting this time?
Yanagi shudders and deletes the message as quickly as possible, as well as his own. Why does he always forget that with him, Sadaharu can read between the lines?
He plunges into his maths textbook and works through three additional chapters on top of his assigned one for homework. He disperses his emotions amongst the rules and numbers of unfailing logic until he feels vaguely safe again. He deletes Inui's email address from his computer to minimize the temptation. He has it memorized, he will add it back in time.
The third visit, Yanagi does not need to lie at all, skimming around the details but conveying to Yukimura the unsettling feeling that after all this time, Inui can read him like an open book. And people wonder why he prefers to keep his eyes shut.
"You grew up on the same logic," Yukimura says in a sigh, "every step of the way you explained to the other, until your perceptions of the same thing became entwined. You both think with two minds."
"Where do you discover these things about me?" Yanagi asks, wrapping arms around himself to smother the feeling of nakedness. He has but one solid fact in his virgin notebook and he is supposed to be the data collecting one of the two of them.
"You tell them to me." Yukimura replies, looking a little confused. It reassures Yanagi, reminds him the only game being played here is his own. He leaves feeling more settled.
"You've seen him." Sanada doesn't phrase it as a question; something in his face must be giving it away, Yanagi decides. He cannot deny it.
"I've managed to persuade him to talk to me a little, yes." Yanagi agrees evenly.
"Were you going to tell me?"
"Genichirou, of course!" Just not yet. "It's not easy; I don't think you would benefit from trying to coerce him to just be nice. And why should you bother when he has hurt you so much?"
Sanada looks just about as conflicted as Yanagi wants him to be. Just a little longer, a little more time to unearth the other parts of Yukimura that he keeps quiet about. An advantage is key. A head-start is necessary.
"I can't even mention anyone else on the team," Yanagi says, leaning in as if conspiring between himself and Sanada. "It will only make him think of tennis. Think, Sanada. Seiichi without tennis."
"Don't." Sanada turns away. "I don't want to think about it."
"Neither do I. Nor does he. But it might be a possibility."
"No!" Sanada says firmly. A girl at the other end of the hallway looks up, and he flushes, mutters an apology for speaking so loudly. "No, it's not."
Yanagi wants to say he knows Sanada might be right, the idea of Yukimura doing something drastic because he could not live without tennis, but it would be pushing Sanada too far.
"He may show signs of improvement soon." Yanagi says instead, lightening his tone. "When he does, you'll both want to see one another." He drops an even more casual tone into his words. "He might be more relieved to see you than you would have hoped for, after such an abscence."
At the end of the day, Sanada is his friend and it does not give him any great sense of pleasure to be throwing him false hope like this, but it is Sanada's mind twisting his carefully chosen words. And he will make it up to Sanada somehow, when this is all over, and he has what he wants. Once he has Yukimura all figured out.
"Genichirou misses you." Yanagi says, laying on Yukimura's bed, propped up by a spare pillow, hands clasped across his waist while his elbows support him further. They are face to face, which means Yanagi's head is at the foot of the bed. He is testing Yukimura again.
"He doesn't come to see me."
"You told him not to."
"That hasn't stopped you." Yukimura points out. Yanagi gives him a wry grin.
"I told him not to, also." He admits. "And in turn we told everyone else not to. Coming from us both, they could not disobey."
"He doesn't understand, does he?" Yukimura asks.
"No." Yanagi replies. "But I have tried to explain."
"Well if he doesn't understand, I'd rather he wasn't here anyway." Yukimura says. "I don't want anyone to look at me with pity. You never look at me with pity."
"I don't think about what you've lost." Yanagi speaks to the ceiling, finding it easier than having to look at Yukimura's face. Or having to look at his face turning away from him. I only think about what I have to gain.
"Neither do I." Yukimura says softly. Yanagi decides then that Yukimura may be more fragile than everyone suspects.
-
characters: Yanagi, Yukimura, Sanada, Inui.
inspiration: Prompts from here, more specifically:
50_darkfics (63) - Masterpiece, 100_leitmotifs (73) - the sum of its parts, and 100_leitmotifs (90) - oubliette.
notes: 2330 words. Cathryn read it over for me and insisted it can stand as it is. And though I usually hate the way I end things and rush them and stuff, it's weird to end it like this. I'll probably add to it at some point.
-
Everyone else comes neatly wrapped in little boxes. Akaya's, Yanagi decides in a moment of whimsy, has a blue ribbon, while Genichirou's is red.
He knows their statistics inside-out, and even more so, he knows how they will react in any given situation. For example, he had predicted that should anything ever happen to their captain in the middle of school to cause distress, Niou would be surprisingly level-headed and methodical, because his mind was sharp and his instincts were perfect, Marui would freeze up, possibly faint if there was blood to be seen, for all his brash talk. Sanada and Kirihara would lose control of their emotions completely and degenerate from yelling to nearly coming to blows in a silent fight over who cared more. And Yanagi also knew his position would be between them, a human blockade for hot-tempers while Yagyuu took up the seat he wished himself to be in; at Yukimura's side attempting to get a reaction.
One thing he does not forsee in the scenario, however, are the first words out of Yukimura's mouth during his and Genichirou's fourth visit; the first in which Yukimura is not sleeping.
"Don't visit me again." He says without looking at either of them. Sanada's response is instantaneous, jumping up and opening his mouth to say something with an anger akin to the fire in his eyes. Yanagi stops him with a firm hand wrapping around Sanada's arm before he can speak. It was agiven that Sanada would not take rejection well; his haggard appearance, the worry line in his forehead, the constant if not literal biting of his lip to keep from saying something irretrievable to Kirihara.
Sanada also knows that Renji will have thought deeper on the words, in the seconds they have been given to process them. He often defers to Yanagi in moments when his emotions threaten to engulf him completely. He closes his mouth again, lips pressing together more tightly than they need to, nods though Yukimura cannot see it, and strides away out of the door.
Yanagi does not speak out after Sanada, simply follows him without looking back. He had not realised Yukimura's pride was so high.
"All that arguing to be allowed in to see him," Sanada says blankly, "a total waste of time. Does he never stop to think that rejection actually hurts?"
Yanagi raises an eyebrow; he had suspected Genichirou's feelings for a long time, but never noticed the point at which he had acted upon them. Gaps within Sanada's data do not last long, however. He tells Renji practically everything.
"I don't believe Seiichi has ever experienced a rejection," he says lightly, but carefully. "So in answer to your question... Perhaps not."
Sanada turns to look at him with the kind of surprise in his face he usually receives after having slapped someone.
"Renji," he says, wanting to sigh, his voice revealing a waver. "What's going on?"
"Genichirou," Yanagi says, and stops. Sanada looks ready to collapse himself, or cry. "Let's get some coffee and I'll explain."
Yanagi vetoes the idea of vending machine coffee, or taking up valuable waiting seats in the hospital reception, and they go to a diner. Sanada ignores his coffee but stares at it longingly, letting Yanagi speak to the waitress and smile politely until she gets the hint and leaves them to it.
"Say you were to collapse in the middle of school," he begins conversationally, trying not to notice the way Sanada's forehead develops deeper lines as he relives the moment. "And you woke up to find Yukimura sitting at your beside, holding your hand. You, I think, probably would not mind that so much. If I happened to be there also, I think you would be accepting of it. But Niou grinning over your bed? Kirihara sitting sullenly, Jackal with concerned eyes..."
"Don't go on." Sanada says.
"Exactly." Yanagi nods. "You would not want them to see you incapacitated. You are the one who usually gives them orders, and discipline. To see you in such a state would undermine your authority with them."
"I understand that much, then." Sanada nods. "But I would make the exception for the two of you!"
His voice cracks on the last word, and Yanagi is almost ashamed at himself and the way he makes a careful note of how it is to see Sanada on the verge of losing faith completely. Almost.
"This is where you differ," he says, curling fingers back around his cup to test the warmth of it again before lifting it to his mouth. "You are not afraid to admit, even if it is only to Seiichi or myself, that there are areas in which you are out of your depth. You rely on us at times, making it, for you, a balance of equals. Apparently, Seiichi has decided that he must be a source of strength not just as captain of the team, but as our friends also. I admit I have also laid problems of my own at his doorstep once or twice. But you don't tend to think that..." Yanagi stops before his own voice can betray him. He does not want to lay himself as bare as Sanada does. He breathes. Sanada is hanging on his words. "That once or twice will lead to such an alignment of dynamics. He does not want us to see him in a moment of weakness, lest we lose all faith in him to be able to support us. He is trying to do what is best."
"He's being an idiot." Sanada says firmly. "And I'll tell him so if I have to. He can't just shut us out like this! If nothing else, you said it yourself, we are his friends."
"Put it that way, and you'll never make him understand." Yanagi says firmly. "Because that is the reason he is pushing us away. Perhaps if we just give him some time..."
Sanada frowns, looking ready to march straight back to the hospital and yell at Yukimura like he was the freshman who forgot to tie the end of the net to the post last week and then lied about it when it collapsed right in front of him. He is jiggling his leg under the table.
"Genichirou." Yanagi says in a tone he saves for very few. "Give me just a little time, and I will think of something. For all our sakes."
Sanada nods reluctantly, and begins to tap his fingers on the table. Yanagi swats at them sharply.
"Go home." He says, and smiles to himself at how much he sounds like he is ordering Sanada around. "Call someone, get out, play a match. I believe Atobe Keigo might be a suitable opponent for your mood."
Sanada scowls, offering up a black look that wishes to defy the possibility that Atobe Keigo could provide him with anything. Yanagi knows that just means he will do it, and it will suffice, for now.
Three days later, Yanagi has a plan.
He slips into Yukimura's room as quietly as possible, though he knows that since Yukimura is not looking towards the door, he has no way of knowing it isn't just another doctor come to check him over. He is on his side again, facing the window and looking out at the callous sun, still managing to shine down brightly on everything when for so many the world is cracked.
Time stands still for a while. For once Yanagi has no concept of how long it's been before he speaks. It comes out even more sudden and awkward than he intended, the weight of his words warping his tongue.
"Sadaharu sent me a blank email again last night." He says, and it's not a lie, because he asked Inui to do it just for that reason. Yukimura twitches noticably, jerks his head around as though to confirm Yanagi is really there before he uses his weight to throw himself onto his back in his bed. Yanagi dies a little inside watching the way Yukimura has already adjusted to a lack of grace or control. He is strong.
"Want to talk about it?" Yukimura asks, and his voice is barely-there and scratchy, but his tiny smile is promising, so Yanagi nods and sits down on the bed, noting that there are no longer any chairs in Yukimura's room at all. For a while, it's just like old times.
The next time Yanagi visits, he tests his theory by reversing his tactics.
"How are you feeling today?" He asks in a tone that rivals the best, or worst, of doctors.
"Get out." Yukimura says.
Yanagi starts a notebook that day, writes down his first unfailing fact in dealing with Yukimura while he is bed-ridden. He then composes an email to Inui that reads;
I understand now the advantages to having certain data noted down on paper. Having something tangible to look back upon gives a vast sense of accomplishment, even if you have not learnt all that much.
Renji, Inui writes in reply, and even though it's typed it seems hasty. Who are you rewriting this time?
Yanagi shudders and deletes the message as quickly as possible, as well as his own. Why does he always forget that with him, Sadaharu can read between the lines?
He plunges into his maths textbook and works through three additional chapters on top of his assigned one for homework. He disperses his emotions amongst the rules and numbers of unfailing logic until he feels vaguely safe again. He deletes Inui's email address from his computer to minimize the temptation. He has it memorized, he will add it back in time.
The third visit, Yanagi does not need to lie at all, skimming around the details but conveying to Yukimura the unsettling feeling that after all this time, Inui can read him like an open book. And people wonder why he prefers to keep his eyes shut.
"You grew up on the same logic," Yukimura says in a sigh, "every step of the way you explained to the other, until your perceptions of the same thing became entwined. You both think with two minds."
"Where do you discover these things about me?" Yanagi asks, wrapping arms around himself to smother the feeling of nakedness. He has but one solid fact in his virgin notebook and he is supposed to be the data collecting one of the two of them.
"You tell them to me." Yukimura replies, looking a little confused. It reassures Yanagi, reminds him the only game being played here is his own. He leaves feeling more settled.
"You've seen him." Sanada doesn't phrase it as a question; something in his face must be giving it away, Yanagi decides. He cannot deny it.
"I've managed to persuade him to talk to me a little, yes." Yanagi agrees evenly.
"Were you going to tell me?"
"Genichirou, of course!" Just not yet. "It's not easy; I don't think you would benefit from trying to coerce him to just be nice. And why should you bother when he has hurt you so much?"
Sanada looks just about as conflicted as Yanagi wants him to be. Just a little longer, a little more time to unearth the other parts of Yukimura that he keeps quiet about. An advantage is key. A head-start is necessary.
"I can't even mention anyone else on the team," Yanagi says, leaning in as if conspiring between himself and Sanada. "It will only make him think of tennis. Think, Sanada. Seiichi without tennis."
"Don't." Sanada turns away. "I don't want to think about it."
"Neither do I. Nor does he. But it might be a possibility."
"No!" Sanada says firmly. A girl at the other end of the hallway looks up, and he flushes, mutters an apology for speaking so loudly. "No, it's not."
Yanagi wants to say he knows Sanada might be right, the idea of Yukimura doing something drastic because he could not live without tennis, but it would be pushing Sanada too far.
"He may show signs of improvement soon." Yanagi says instead, lightening his tone. "When he does, you'll both want to see one another." He drops an even more casual tone into his words. "He might be more relieved to see you than you would have hoped for, after such an abscence."
At the end of the day, Sanada is his friend and it does not give him any great sense of pleasure to be throwing him false hope like this, but it is Sanada's mind twisting his carefully chosen words. And he will make it up to Sanada somehow, when this is all over, and he has what he wants. Once he has Yukimura all figured out.
"Genichirou misses you." Yanagi says, laying on Yukimura's bed, propped up by a spare pillow, hands clasped across his waist while his elbows support him further. They are face to face, which means Yanagi's head is at the foot of the bed. He is testing Yukimura again.
"He doesn't come to see me."
"You told him not to."
"That hasn't stopped you." Yukimura points out. Yanagi gives him a wry grin.
"I told him not to, also." He admits. "And in turn we told everyone else not to. Coming from us both, they could not disobey."
"He doesn't understand, does he?" Yukimura asks.
"No." Yanagi replies. "But I have tried to explain."
"Well if he doesn't understand, I'd rather he wasn't here anyway." Yukimura says. "I don't want anyone to look at me with pity. You never look at me with pity."
"I don't think about what you've lost." Yanagi speaks to the ceiling, finding it easier than having to look at Yukimura's face. Or having to look at his face turning away from him. I only think about what I have to gain.
"Neither do I." Yukimura says softly. Yanagi decides then that Yukimura may be more fragile than everyone suspects.
-