Return post and a surprise

[frodofigment]

Bingo already wrote back. That was fast... I was expecting to have more time to get adjusted to this place again. Oh, well... I'm utterly terrified and nervous, but this is a good thing. The sooner I am able to talk to him the better

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[bbolger_baggins]

*nods, appreciating the care being offered, but somewhat disturbed that it was so uncomplicated, he sensed no sexual response, no need, like his own and maybe that was part of . . everything that happened . . . or maybe not. Who knows, really.* No, I-I think that's best.

All right. *pours more tea* I don't know. *looks out the window* It doesn't look like its about to right now. *looks back at him and shrugs* So how is your mother doing? It's been so long since we've seen her. *sips his tea*

[frodofigment]

*nods* I agree. *looks down at his hands* I feel as if... if I were to touch you, even on the hand...yes, I am glad we did not shake earlier for this reason, too that I could not then stop myself from falling into familiar patterns which I do not think I am ready for, and I am certain you are not. It is hard to defeat the desire to touch, to comfort... *sigh* But I'm afraid that even the smallest of actions could hurt.

No... I hope it doesn't. I should like to make some changes to the smial I bought, or I don't think I'll be able to sleep in it. I'm afraid I have not slept under any roof, much less under ground, in awhile.

I... I do not know how Primula is. I have not seen her, either. I am certain she died when all of the other muses did. ..........*decides not to withhold information* Much of the Shire was destroyed, and nearly all the people of my home died. I'm afraid she was among them...*looks down into his tea cup with a stunned expression* As would be Smeagol... Bilbo... Sam, Rosie, the children...oh, sweet Eru I had not

[bbolger_baggins]

*listens, holds his tea tightly, nods, crosses his legs, sips his tea* Yes . . . yes, I think so.

Oh? Like what kind of cha . . . you've been . . outdoorsy? *incredulous*

*looks at him concerned, concern changing to astonishment* Oh no! *shakes his head trying to comprehend this* I . . . how . . . *looks with worry at Iorhael, gripping his tea cup tightly*

[frodofigment]

Yes, I suppose you could say I have been "outdoorsy". Very much so. Let us say that I'm just now getting reaquainted with a hobbit body.

*blinks rapidly, trying to grasp what happened himself, having not realized before due to his lack of reconnection to the Shire* I have been so focused on my memories of you and this place that I forgot my connections there...*chews his lip, and starts wiping his eyes again* Excuse me...oh....*takes a deep breath and tries to steady himself* There... there was a lot of death. Disuse. A plague, of sorts. I was absorbed in my own pain and there was nothing I could do to stop it... nothing to keep them alive. I became numb to it. I was dying myself. When I finally did... I'm so integrated into their lives....oh, how could I not realize? Oh, Bingo... I think I really must go. I cannot talk about this more and you do not need it.

[bbolger_baggins]

*blinks, doesn't know how to make sense of that* I don't understand.

*bites his lip, trying to comprehend, tears up in reaction* Is there something I can get you? *gets up* Should you really . . . *shakes his head* No, I'm all right . . . I . . . but you . . . ?

[frodofigment]

I came back as a unicorn and that is still my preferred form when I'm back in my home land. Only there, though. It is sure to be inconvenient anywhere else.

*gets up, automatically pushes his chair in* No, no, I'll be alright. *reaches for Bingo in reaction to seeing the other tearing up on his behalf, pulls back and shakes his head* No... I'll be alright. I didn't realize, and it's a shock and... oh, I'm sorry...no, this is no good...I'll just go home and think of what I can do... what I can do to...to bring them back, as best I can... and...and... I'll come by another time... thank you for the tea.... please, come by some time... bring Elanor....oh....I'm so sorry for this, I've gotten really upset just now and have distressed you. Please, don't worry about it.

[bbolger_baggins]

*blinks* I . . . *sudden thought* . . . well . . . that accounts for the dreams then.

*sees him reach, stops himself from reaching back, grabs the back of his own chair and holds on, nods* Yes of course. Of course . . . no don't worry . . . I understa . . . *stops himself*

. . . understand very little of this. If there's anything I can do, do come . . . if you need to go, please go ahead, by all means!

*holds the chair not knowing what he should do*

[frodofigment]

Dreams?

*nods* I'm sorry. I'll explain more when I'm more capable. *nods* Thank you, Bingo. That means a lot. Again... I'm sorry.

Thank you for the tea. For listening. Have... have a good rest of the day. *goes to his cloak*

[bbolger_baggins]

Yes. I've dreamt of unicorns . . . but not like that. . . with sunflowers. *bites his lip*

*nods, confused* Yes . . . no . . . it's all right.

You're welcome. *rushed* Yes. Thank you for coming by. Go safely. *goes to open the door for him*

[frodofigment]

*light smile* Yes, that would be accurate since I did plant one of your sunflowers...

*gets his cloak on and steps out, turning back to Bingo* I will. I hate to leave this way but I must...*sighs and looks over his shoulder, then smiles at Bingo in an effort to distract him from his upset* Oh, get back inside! You'll let all that nice warmth out, and then what will happen to winter?

Good-bye, Bingo. Take care of yourself until I see you again. *pulls his cloak around himself tightly and heads off*