(Untitled)

[nightshade1972]

I have been informed, via Facebook (to which I crossposted my last entry), that "my reaction to the comment was 40 times worse" than the original comment about how the desire to become engaged equates to being "brain damaged".  The person who originally made the "engagement = brain damaged" comment "liked" that response

Comments

[alicephilippa]

No one should have to grow a thicker skin. Ableism, even when it is supposed to be a joke (maybe especially when it is a so-called joke) needs to be called out when it happens. Anyone with any sensitivity will get why it's being called out.

I'm sure we've all slipped with ableism, sexism, &c., but I'd be pretty certain that we have rapidly corrected ourselves too especially if it is pointed out to us. OTOH, you have to be an asshole to continue on with the "stop being over-sensitive" tack.

[farnam]

some people just need to be unfriended. They might appear nice and friendly on the surface, but if they are that stuck in thier own privilidge, they are not actually good people, underneith

[ammos]

Idiots. Hugs hope this stupidity hasn't upset you too much.

[4o5pastmidnight]

They need to learn to adjust their behavior and stop saying such hurtful things. If I say something that upsets someone I'm close to, I'll ask them what exactly it was that upset them so I can understand, I'll apologize and try to never say anything like that again. Sure, I may not find it offensive, but the point is that they do and friends don't antagonize friends on serious issues. You've made it obvious that you find those comments hurtful, and yet they're still being assholes? Defriending time.

I'm sorry you have to deal with that.

[nightshade1972]

I've since defriended both of them. They'll probably never understand why, but as the saying goes, "for those who understand, no explanation is necessary. For those who don't, no explanation is enough."

[mdehners]

Welcome to the world most GLBT-folk live in. Friends and family, even those you consider "Aware" will regularly say things that are down-right Hurtful AND will not even "get" that they WERE. At least with Disabilities, the general Western Culture is that it's at least in "Poor Taste". We're just told to "Stop Being So Sensitive". Truthfully, if I "deleted" every Het in my life that said at least two Hurtful comments a month to me and/or my Partner I'd have no Het Friends or family.
It's just LIFE whne you're the only "acceptable" Minority to be considered a 2nd Class Cit....if that high.
Cheers,
Pat

[lilenth]

Yeah, really not happy with your comment, I'm GLBTQ as well and disabled, and I get shit and "stop being so sensitive" over them both, and my gender as well. People pull it on all minorities not just GLBTQ people.

You just know a lot of hetero assholes is all.

[mdehners]

Quite true....5 decades "Out" of all Closets,2 and 1/2 continents(if you count Turkey),5 countries and a shitload of counties, Parishes, towns, cities.
Plenty of "Learning Experiences", enough to pretty much tune out Crap to keep Living in their world.
Cheers,
PTD

[nightshade1972]

What they said. I have no intention of turning this into a "who is more disabled?" chest-thumping exercise. I also have no control over who you choose to associate with. If, by "tuning out" all the "hurtful comments" you receive, you'd "have no het friends or family", and you're somehow okay with being considered a "second class citizen", don't visit that on me. I am most assuredly NOT okay with someone making ableist comments and then telling me I should stop being so sensitive when I voice an objection. If that's how you choose to live your life, I can't stop you, but please don't tell me how to live mine.