Paint
Paint (1/2)
Genre: Romance, Slight angst
Pairing: Elvin, Past Vinseop, Minor SooSeop
Warnings: MalexMale, children everywhere!
Disclaimer: I don't own the boys... Not even a little bit...
Summary: It only took some green paint in preschool to make Kevin fall, but it took 23 years and meddlesome Kiseop for Kevin to confess.
A/N: Um... Yeah... Remember when I mentioned being swamped by tests and projects? Well it turned into a waterfall and I have not been able to write anything legit for the past two weeks. Then my editor went on vacation for a week and didn't want to post anything without her stamp of a approval because she is ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL!! I realize that TLOF should be my priority, but this monster has been my baby for the past month, and I could not write TLOF and this at the same time. So here I give you the first of many TLOF based oneshots. I know many people probably wanted one that involved SuJu, since TLOF is a Kyumin story, but it just really doesn't mesh well for any of the SuJu ones I have planned to post them this early. That and my Elvin muse has been prodding me with a fork... So you guys get Elvin! Anyway, TLOF updates WILL resume either this week or next week, granted school does not try to kill me again! Enjoy!
Paint
Another summer had passed, ushering the coming of fall. Kevin could feel the chill working its way through his body, a cool breeze tousling his chestnut brown hair. He rubbed his arms, lightly bouncing in his spot on the playground. Toddlers with far too much energy than should be normal ran around and in between his legs, clearly not affected by the weather as much as he was.
“Most people would think to grab a coat before running out into November weather.” A hand perched itself on his shoulder, rubbing it tenderly. Kevin shoved his hands into his apron pockets.
“I was late this morning. My microwave exploded, Eeteuk. Exploded. The last thing I was thinking about was bringing a jacket.” Kevin shivered. Eeteuk sighed.
“Are you alright?”
“Tired, but okay. The burning tinfoil didn’t kill me…” Kevin pouted. Eeteuk rubbed soothing circles on his back.
“Well, at least now you’ll know that tin foil and microwaves create fire murder,” Eeteuk laughed.
“Fine, laugh at my expense,” Kevin mumbled.
“Aw, I’m not laughing at you. Really, don’t give me that look,” Eeteuk chided. Kevin rolled his eyes, but smiled nonetheless.
“Did you have a reason for coming out here? Aren’t you supposed to be in a meeting with our fearless leader?”
“Changmin pushed it back. And you were doing that ‘I’m in love with you but I can’t tell you’ thing so I thought I would come and push you out of that funk.”
Kevin bit his lower lip, allowing his gaze to drift away from Eeteuk and fall on another person standing on the opposite side of the playground. He was tall and broad, everything Kevin wished he could be. Normally, most people would call that admiration, and normally it would be. But Kevin had spent too long trying to tell himself that only to be hit in the heart when he realized he’d fallen hard. It was one thing to admire someone’s muscled arms and an entirely different thing to want those same arms to wrap around you and never let go.
The person looked up and met Kevin’s eyes. A sly smile made its way across his face, as the children played around his legs. Kevin gave his own shy smile, only breaking eye contact when he felt Eeteuk place a hand on his shoulder.
“Goodness, the sexual tension out here is thick!”
Kevin closed his eyes.
“Eeteuk, can you just… not?”
“Not what? Imply that you’ve been holding a torch for him for the past four years? Because I have no intention of stopping that anytime soon,” Eeteuk chuckled.
Actually Kevin had been “holding a torch” for much longer than four years, but he wasn’t about to tell Eeteuk that.
“Eli doesn’t-“
“Doesn’t what? Like you? Want to make sweet, uncensored love to you?”
“EETEUK!!” Kevin covered his face in embarrassment.
“What? You’re not making any sense!” Eeteuk threw his hands up in exasperation.
“We’re just friends! That’s not going to change anytime soon!” Kevin exclaimed.
“Well of course it’s not going to change if you’re not going to do anything about it!” Eeteuk spread his hands in front of him. Kevin went silent. Eeteuk looked at the other man contemplatively, wondering whether or not to speak. They stood next to each other in silence.
“He…”
Eeteuk looked at his companion. Kevin was looking down, an uncharacteristically morose look on his face.
“He… doesn’t remember me…”
Kevin looked down at his hands, white teeth chewing his lower lip like they usually did when he was deep in thought.
“Kevin?”
Kevin awoke from his daze. He smiled reassuringly at Eeteuk.
“Don’t worry about it. Eli and I are friends, and that’s the way it’ll stay.”
“Even if it tears you apart?” Eeteuk spoke softly.
“It won’t be the first time I’ve been disappointed in life. I’ll be fine; don’t worry. Now, I’m going to go clean up inside before the terrors come back in for snack time.” Kevin flounced off before Eeteuk could protest. There was a flawless smile playing on his lips, but he felt anything but happy.
The classroom was typical of a preschool: messy, and colorful, essentially an overload to the senses. Toys strewn about the carpet painfully poked Kevin’s thin-soled shoes as he walked across the room to clean the tables left in a less than clean state. The nearby easel had what Kevin assumed was a cat… dog… thing messily painted on it. The brightly colored paints lay on the table, completely innocent, though the mess that had been created on the table was enough to make any mother weep. Kevin’s eyes swept the primary colors, sighing when he realized the mess had been fabricated in an attempt to form other colors than the ones that were provided. A wry smile bloomed on his face as his hand reached down to pluck the blue pot from the table.
Why don’t they ever have any green?
OoO
Clumsy, chubby fingers reached for the blue, intending to smear it all over their artistic masterpiece. When Kevin could not find it, he began to look around for it, wildly turning his head to find the elusive paint. He found it in someone else’s hands and frowned.
“Hey! That’s mine!” He called out. The other person turned, a wicked smile playing on otherwise innocent lips.
“This isn’t yours! I found it on the table! I can use it if I want!”
Kevin’s lips trembled. That was his paint… His mommy had given it to him yesterday as a birthday present…
“It’s mine! My mommy gave it to me! I need it to finish my painting!” Kevin slowly got up. His puffy hands were balled up at his sides in a show of childish anger only a toddler could conjure. The other toddler waddled over to take a look at his painting, the same cruel smile lighting his face.
“It’s ugly! You don’t need any more paint! You’ll just make it uglier!”
Those words cut through Kevin like a machete through the Amazon forest. Large tears began to form at the corners of the boy’s soft brown eyes. He sat back down, looking at his painting.
“I worked hard on it…” Kevin whispered, tears close to falling down his face. The bully laughed.
“It’s just a mess! Your mommy wouldn’t want to see it!”
Kevin hiccupped, tears slowly coursing down his face. He’d just wanted to make his mommy something to thank her… Why wasn’t it good enough?
“Hey, what are you doing!”
Kevin looked up at the bully’s shout, eyes wide with surprise. A bigger boy had taken Kevin’s blue paint from the other toddler and was walking towards Kevin. He kneeled down, holding Kevin’s beloved paint in front of him.
“This is yours, right?”
Kevin nodded, but didn’t take it. He continued staring at his feet. The boy was confused by Kevin’s actions and tried to shove the paint forward so it was practically under Kevin’s chin.
“You don’t want it?”
“My painting isn’t pretty…” Kevin trailed off, looking at his painting. It was supposed to be his house with him and his mommy, but he didn’t have any green. He’d wanted to add blue to make up for the green he didn’t have, but then the bully…
“Why do you think that?” The boy asked.
“He said it was ugly,” Kevin’s lip trembled again. The boy frowned and looked at Kevin’s painting.
“Well I think it looks great! It just needs some more colors!” The boy exclaimed. He dragged a chair to sit down beside Kevin. Kevin looked at him curiously.
“But I only have red, yellow, and blue. How can I add more colors?”
The boy grinned. He grabbed a nearby plastic tray with multiple indents in it. He poured a bit of each of the three colors and did something revolutionary. He began to mix them. Suddenly vibrant orange and lime green erupted from the tray. Kevin gasped in wonder.
“Wow! I didn’t know you could do that!”
“Isn’t it cool? Now you can add a bajillion colors to your painting!”
Kevin laughed, eagerly dipping his brush into the green to smear it in an imitation of grass. He laughed again when the color bloomed across his paper. He turned back to the boy.
“It looks awesome! Your mommy is really gonna like it!” The boy exclaimed. Kevin’s eyes sparkled as he smiled.
“You promise?”
“I promise”
Two chubby pinkies tangled in an innocent promise.
OoO
“You do know that the paint is for the kiddies to play with, right?”
Kevin started, nearly dropping the paint in the process. He quickly put the blue paint back on the table. With a sheepish smile Kevin faced the intruder.
“I got distracted.”
Eli walked forward, placing a friendly arm around Kevin’s shoulders. Kevin tried not to jump at the close contact.
“Aw, was Kevin jealous of the kids that get to play with paint all day? Do you want naptime too?”
Kevin pushed Eli away, grinning at Eli’s antics. The man laughed, losing his balance for a moment but regaining it quickly.
“I was just thinking about when I was a kid. I used to play with the paint all the time. I would never play with the toys like the other kids. The teachers tried to pull me away from the easel so many times, but they could never keep me away,” Kevin recounted. His eyes dropped back to the nostalgia inducing paints, gaze softening as he recalled the memory of the boy who’d helped him learn how to mix the colors of the rainbow. Even now, he could still recall the broad shouldered four-year-old that had fought off bullies for him and helped him smile.
“You like art, right?”
Kevin looked back at Eli. The other seemed slightly nervous, fidgeting in his spot.
“I wouldn’t have majored in art if I didn’t,” Kevin responded. For some reason, Eli’s nervous behavior was rubbing off on Kevin. He could feel his heart begin to pound, though it was nothing new for him. Every time Eli so much as sent him a look, Kevin could feel himself flush a little pinker and fall a little harder.
“Well I was wondering, if you were free… we could go to the art museum this weekend.” Eli had trained his eyes on the nearby windows, not quite looking at Kevin. “We haven’t hung out in a while, and my friend gave me tickets to see the new gallery that’s gonna open.”
“I would love to,” Kevin breathed, unable to contain the fluttering in his chest. A true smile broke over his soft features. Eli smirked.
“There it is.”
“What?”
“You’ve been oddly withdrawn lately. Has everything been okay?” Eli’s eyebrows drew together in worry. Kevin shook his head.
“No, I’m fine, just a little stressed. I’m still trying to find a job, and my mom’s been kind of sick lately, so I’ve been worrying. But there’s nothing wrong!” Kevin waved his hands in front him.
“Why don’t you tell me these things?” Eli sighed.
“There’s nothing to tell. And I wouldn’t want to burden you with my problems. I know you’ve got it hard enough as it is… How is your sister doing anyway?” Kevin explained.
“I see you trying to change the subject, so don’t think you’re getting off the hook! But she’s fine. She’s starting in Seoul University this year.” Eli couldn’t help the pride rolling off his persona. Kevin placed a hand on the other’s shoulder.
“I’m happy for you. You worked hard so she could go. Your parents holding up okay?”
“They’re constantly chirping about how proud they are that they could get at least one of their children into college. They always felt bad that I couldn’t go ‘cause money was tight, so at least this lightens their hearts a little. But now that Angie’s in she has to work doubly hard for the both of us.” Eli shrugged.
“I’m sure they’re proud of you too. You’re the only reason she could go. I admire you for that.” Kevin allowed his hand to trail down Eli’s arm in a soothing gesture, though he really shouldn’t have let himself get so close to Eli in the first place.
“I admire you too.” Eli’s eyes met Kevin’s with an intensity that completely caught the shorter of the two off guard. His breath caught in his throat. Eli was way too close now, his face mere inches from Kevin’s. Kevin wanted to say anything to dispel the way he was spellbound with no hope of moving.
“Alright kiddies, back in the room! Hop to it!”
Eeteuk’s voice washed over Kevin like bucket of cold water to the face, and he shook himself out of his trance. He looked sheepishly at Eli.
“I should go help Teukkie.” Kevin didn’t give Eli a chance to respond, knowing that the moment Eli opened his mouth he would completely lose his focus. With quick, long strides he made his way to the hallway to help usher in the kids. When he returned to the room, Eli had already left. Kevin tried to tell himself that the disappointment he felt was stupid.
“You did a great job of cleaning up here… I don’t even want to know what your room looks like at home,” Eeteuk teased. The classroom was still a mess due to Eli’s intervention, but that didn’t seem to deter the toddlers from playing with the toys.
“I know; I’m sorry. I got caught up.”
“Do I even need to ask who caught you
Kevin groaned and buried his face in his hands.
OoO
Kevin sized himself up in the mirror. Clean uniform, check. Flawless face, check. Styled hair, check. He was ready for his first day of high school.
He quickly ran down the stairs, reaching the kitchen in a breathless state. His mother looked up from her cooking. She smiled, placing a bowl of rice in front of her son.
“My, aren’t we excited? Are you sure you didn’t forget anything?”
Kevin shook his head, attempting to talk in between bites of his rice and the various side dishes his mother had prepared.
“I checked it all last night before I went to bed. I am one hundred percent prepared!”
“That’s my boy. Now, make sure you aren’t late.”
Kevin nodded vigorously, making short work of his breakfast. His mother watched him with a fond smile on her face. She remained quiet, watching him bustle around, tugging on brand new shoes and his favorite jacket. As he was about to leave she caught his arm.
“Kevin.”
Kevin gave her a curious look. She seemed worried, the frown lines around her mouth more apparent. They made her look older, a fact that shocked Kevin.
“Please be careful. If anything happens, please tell me. I don’t want you getting hurt like last time.”
“It won’t come to that. Not this time. I promise.”
“But please. For the sake of your old mother. I only want you to be safe.” She squeezed the hand she held captive.
“Okay mom. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
With that, Kevin was out the door and walking towards his new high school. Kevin had studied hard to get into this school; not only did it have outstanding academic standing, but it held one of the most esteemed high school art programs in the country. He’d spent months living and breathing study guides and test prep, and to finally be wearing the uniform of the prestigious school was a much needed confidence boost.
The brunette had spent most of his middle school years evading bullies who thought he was too girly, too pretty, too artsy to be around everyone else who’d been deemed normal. He’d suffered through having his lunch thrown in his face, being harassed in the locker rooms, and almost being beat up on multiple occasions. Kevin refused let them win. He kept going to school, even getting the best grades in his class, though his true passion lay with the power of a paintbrush. He’d spent many an hour painting his life away in the art room when the bullies got to be too much. And now he was here, walking to his new escape from uneducated bullies who could never understand the true ability of paint on a canvas.
Arriving at the campus, Kevin took a deep breath, letting a smile light his features. Walking confidently, he took in the trees lining the beautiful outside of the school. Unfortunately, Kevin was far too dazed by his surroundings to notice the ball heading towards his head and the accompanying warning.
“Watch out!”
The unsuspecting teen was hit in the head with a soccer ball. The force of the ball knocked him to the ground with a cry. Kevin landed on his butt, his bag falling a ways away from him. For a moment, Kevin saw stars dancing in his vision. He closed his eyes, gripping his head with a groan. This was not the reality he’d wanted.
“Shit man, I’m sorry! Are you okay?”
Kevin felt someone kneel next to him. Kevin opened his eyes to glare at the person, but his voice caught in his throat.
He was gorgeous: all tan muscle and sculpted cheekbones. A mop of jet black hair swirled with the wind, showing penetrating brown eyes. Strong hands gripped his shoulder and arm, their hold firm but gentle at the same time. Despite the fact that Kevin swore he’d never met a more handsome man in his life, he couldn’t shake the fact that he looked familiar.
“Crap, I must’ve hit you really hard for you to still be in shock. Can you stand?”
Kevin nodded, trying to speak, but only managing a vague squeak. Kevin’s cheeks colored at the embarrassing noise, but the other only smiled kindly. Kevin scrambled up, eager to stop making a fool of himself. The teen looked around, locating Kevin’s bag and picking it up.
“This is yours, right?”
That was when it hit Kevin. Those same words had been spoken to him eleven years ago by a four year old much larger than him who’d taught him how to smile and how to paint, a four year old with a confident smirk and sparkle in his eye…
A four year old that looked very much like the teen in front of him.
For the second time that day Kevin found himself unable to locate his voice. He took the bag from the other, eyeing him curiously. He was completely sure that he was the same toddler that he’d met in preschool. The question was if he recognized Kevin. But that didn’t seem to be the case. As soon as the other handed Kevin his bag, he clapped him on the shoulder and said:
“Again, I’m sorry. I’ll aim better next time, yeah?”
It was when he turned to leave the Kevin found his voice suddenly returned to him.
“Wait! What’s your name?”
The teen stopped, turned, and gave Kevin a salute.
“Eli.”
And he was gone to join his friends, leaving Kevin with a dirtied uniform and a pounding heart.
OoO
Eli didn’t regret bringing Kevin to the art exhibit for one second. Though the man was normally bright and happy, it had been clear that something had been bogging him down as of late. In his own element, Kevin flitted between paintings and sculptures, constantly mumbling to himself in thought. The miniscule smile that played on the brunette’s lips was the first sliver of true happiness Eli had seen in weeks. Seeing Kevin so light was like a breath of fresh air for Eli, his worry at his friend’s behavior dissipating. Because that’s what Kevin was: just a friend.
Eli shook his head, irritated; it was becoming more and more difficult to fend off these thoughts that he may think of Kevin as more than just his kind coworker who had the patience of a saint. Now he was the man who could make his heart mimic a horse during a race with just a simple look his way. Of course Kevin had no idea that he held such a power over him, and Eli intended to keep it that way.
Kevin stood in front of a painting, nose wrinkled cutely in thought, a single hand tucked under his chin. His mouth moved in a jumbled mumble of words so quiet that Eli could barely hear him. The blonde took an almost sadistic pleasure in jumping him out of his reverie.
“What are you so deep in thought for?” Eli clapped a hand on his shoulder. Predictably Kevin jumped, shooting Eli a dirty look, which really was on par with the look of a soaked kitten.
“I was just looking at the painting; it’s been a while since the artist in me has had a chance to come out so I’m enjoying it while it lasts,” Kevin said, sounding particularly sad, though he tried to smile through it.
“Well, I think…erm… the colors… show a great loneliness and ah, suffering.” Eli closed his eyes, trying to seem like the authority on art. It was totally worth it to make a fool of himself if only he could hear Kevin laugh more often.
“Such insight professor Kim! Please, impart more of your wisdom upon me,” Kevin giggled. Eli tried to ignore the fluttering in his stomach.
“Direct your eyes to this paint stroke right here. The vertical motion indicates the artist’s anger towards life for its unfair treatment. You can see this through how deep the stroke is and how it is the only yellow in the image. Are you taking notes?” Eli glanced at Kevin though corner of his eyes. The other man nodded eagerly.
“Of course! This’ll be on the test right?”
“Absolutely! Make sure to be thorough. This is a very in depth analysis.” Eli could barely keep the smile off his face. Kevin’s body was wracked with uncontrollable laughter, which Eli quickly followed. It took them a while to calm down. When Kevin finally regained control of his ability to speak he gave Eli a meaningful look.
“Thank you for taking me here. I don’t think I’ve had so much fun in ages!”
“It’s no problem. You’ve been kinda down lately. It sucks to see you like that, especially when you’re usually the bright spot in my day.” Eli wasn’t sure if he’d said something wrong when Kevin looked down, suddenly downcast.
“I’m sorry, I really don’t want you to worry about me. I’m fine!”
“It’s okay to admit that you need help sometimes. I’ll be there when you need me. I want you to trust me, choose me when you feel like you need support.” Eli couldn’t help but feel that he was about to step over a line that he’d set for himself but then Kevin looked at him so brokenly, and Eli suddenly didn’t care.
“Eli, I-“
“Kev baby, is that you?”
For the love of all things holy!
Kevin whirled around, eyes widening comically when he saw a beanpole of a man heading towards them.
“Kiseop!”
Ki-who now?
Kevin was gone in a matter of seconds, practically launching himself into the other man’s arms. Eli had never wanted to hurt someone more than at that moment.
“Baby, I’ve missed you! It’s been ages!” This Kiseop was doing a good job of making Eli want to grab his head and smash it in the ground. Acting all familiar with Kevin… Who the hell was this guy!
“What are you doing here?” Kevin slowly pulled away.
“You didn’t know? This is my gallery. I painted everything here.” Kiseop opened his arms with a flourish. The man was dressed to the T in a suit and purple dress shirt, looking quite chic… if Eli hadn’t already deemed him an asshole.
“What? Really? That’s amazing Kiseop! I’m so proud of you!” Kevin leaned in for another hug, leaving Eli to fight with his violent urges to rip Kiseop a new one. When Kiseop pulled away he seemed to finally notice Eli’s existence.
“And who is this, baby?” Kiseop motioned towards Eli.
“I’m Eli Kim, Kevin’s coworker,” Eli introduced, cutting Kevin off. Strangely, a sly smirk wove itself onto Kiseop’s face.
“Eli huh? Is he--?” Kiseop looked at Kevin curiously. Kevin sent him a warning glance, looking uncharacteristically stern though it seemed his countenance was colored with a hint of fear. Kiseop’s smirk got impossibly wider, his eyebrows rising up in tandem with the motion.
“I see. So Eli… Have you seen any of Kevin’s paintings? They’re fabulous I assure you.”
“K-Kiseop!”
Eli watched the way Kevin jumped at Kiseop’s statement.
“No, I haven’t, but I’d like to.” Though Eli was talking to Kiseop, his eyes were firmly trained on Kevin.
“You really should have him show you sometime. He has some very interesting techniques. I think you would find them quite… enlightening.”
Kiseop knew something. Something that Kevin didn’t want Eli to know. Something that Kiseop wanted Eli to know. Something that was important.
“Kiseop.”
The man in question looked at Kevin, noticing the pleading look he was giving him. Some sort of nonverbal communication seemed to have passed in between them and Kiseop sighed, shrugging his shoulders.
“Fine baby, you win. Do you want me to show you around?”
“That would be lovely. Come on Eli.” Kevin’s stance relaxed. Kiseop began to lead Kevin, Eli following resignedly. But before Kiseop fully turned, he shot Eli a meaningful look, as though letting him know that there was definitely something he needed to know. Eli sighed, feeling a migraine slowly growing in his head; it was going to be a long day.
Art show week was always a drag. It meant a week of teachers emphasizing how art was a form of expression, of freedom. Eli scoffed. He could express himself just fine with stick figures; he didn’t need to know how to paint a bowl of fruit to feel free. Unfortunately his teachers didn’t seem to feel the same, forcing trip after trip upon her students to the art show masterfully located in the gym. And there was another reason to hate the art show; it got rid of his favorite sports during gym, relocating his class to the track for various tiring workouts.
And so, it was one such day that found Eli idly walking through with his partner in crime, AJ, and making derogatory comments wherever he went.
“Is that a penis?”
“… I think it’s a chef’s hat.”
“Are you serious?”
“It could be a mushroom…”
“Was it a guy who made it?”
AJ peered at the nametag, seeing a decidedly male name on the piece of cardboard.
“It’s a guy.”
“Then it’s definitely a penis.”
“Does everything have to look like a penis to you?”
“I’m a teen in the throws of puberty and hormone rage; of course everything looks like a penis to me,” Eli snorted. AJ rolled his eyes.
“So manly.”
“Don’t you know it!”
“Have you ever thought that you should just keep your mouth shut sometimes?”
“And have you miss out on the opportunity to listen to my glorious voice?”
“You’re a dick.”
Eli only laughed at AJ’s dry statement, finding so much truth in it. With enough hormones running through his system to knock out a cow, the only thing he could really think of was sex, giving even the simplest thing he looked at a sexual connotation. It was only natural that AJ would feel the need to call him a dick, since that was all they talked about. Well, that and vaginas… couldn’t forget that.
“Hey smart one. Since you’re so eager to talk, what does this look like?”
AJ had gone out of his way to pick the most monotonous painting he could find. The entire thing was composed of only green with varying hues swirling around. There was a placard below the painting containing a description and the artists name, but Eli couldn’t give two shits about the fail explanation that the student had given to cover his ass for how bad of a painting he’d made.
“What the hell AJ? What is this even supposed to be?” Eli furrowed his eyebrows. AJ shrugged his shoulders.
“Since you have so much to say, I thought I should ask you, O wise one.”
“It’s green… What the hell is it supposed to mean?”
“Well you were acting so high and mighty two seconds ago…”
“Whatever AJ…” Eli rolled his eyes.
“So much for your supposed wisdom,” AJ chuckled, leaving Eli to stare at the failure of a painting. It was so annoying. The thing was just green but somehow it merited being called art? Painters were so overrated these days.
Eli began to walk away, but then he was compelled by some bizarre force to look back right before turning the corner. What had originally been the lamest painting transformed itself with Eli’s realization. Within the painting strokes were letters, letters that shook Eli to the core. Those letters spelled his name, in flowing strokes that would easily be missed if seen up close. Eli felt the need to get away from the painting, feeling frantic and suddenly unsure. He walked away from the painting in his panic, failing to notice the nervous soft brown eyes that trailed his departure.
OoO
“It’s been awhile Kiseop,” Kevin stated, sitting himself down at the booth. Following their meeting at the gallery, Kiseop had insisted that they meet up the next day to catch up. Kevin had agreed, partially because he really did want to talk to Kiseop, but mostly because he knew that if he didn’t the artist would not hesitate to track him down and interrogate him about his life. Kiseop was truly a force to be feared…
“I know it’s been hard. I would’ve tried to stay in contact more, but things got hectic with the exhibit so I’ve been really busy. I’m really happy I saw you at the gallery yesterday, baby.” Kiseop leaned forward to rest his chin on his hand.
“Me too. I’m glad you found a way in; I’ve been stuck looking for a job,” Kevin sighed. Kiseop’s hand automatically reached out to comfort him. Kevin smiled feebly.
“Well it doesn’t look like it’s too bad for you. I mean you get to hang out with that Eli hunk all day! Of course the screaming children probably ruin whatever sexy vibe you have going on there.” Kiseop shook his head in mock pity. Kevin groaned.
“Kiseop, there’s nothing going on between us!”
“Your lack of confidence is going to kill you one day, I swear! God, you were difficult when I was dating you, but I’m starting to think that you’re even more insufferable now!” Kiseop threw his hands up in exasperation.
“… I’m sorry…”
Kiseop looked over at Kevin, internally wincing at the way Kevin was hanging his head and staring determinedly at his coffee cup.
“Shit, Kevin I didn’t mean it that way. You know I love you, right?”
“Even now, I feel terrible for leading you on the way I did. I never meant to hurt you,” Kevin sighed, eyes refusing to meet Kiseop’s.
“No baby, I was the one that insisted. I was the one who was too blind to realize that you would never love me. You did tell me that you could never love me the way I had loved you, I just didn’t want to believe you.” Kiseop shook his head. He quickly brightened, and began to rummage through his coat pocket for something. He pulled out his cellphone, rapidly scrolling through the pictures to and pushing the screen into Kevin’s face. The day care worker took the phone, studying the picture with a curious frown. The man in the picture smiled at him without a care in the world.
“His name is Soohyun. He’s my boyfriend. We began dating six months ago.”
Kevin looked up in surprise. The gentlest smile Kevin had ever seen graced Kiseop’s face.
“I’m happy for you. Things seem to be looking up, huh?” Kevin chuckled, though it sounded weak even in his own ears. Kiseop nodded.
“I didn’t show you that to rub it in your face. I wanted to let you know that I’ve moved on. I don’t regret going out with you for a second, but it was destined to end eventually. I can’t compete with a 23-year old love, especially one as powerful as yours.” Kiseop reached out to take his phone back from Kevin. “I’ve gotta say though that you’re certainly dedicated. Eli will be lucky to have you.”
“It’s never going to happen-“
Kiseop cut Kevin off by raising his index finger. Kevin furrowed his eyebrows.
“I’ve moved on and it’s time you do the same. I’m not going to watch you make yourself miserable, so I’m giving you a choice. You tell him how you feel in one week, or else I will.”
“Wh-what! That’s not fair! You wouldn’t!” Kevin gasped. A scary smile crawled onto Kiseop’s face.
“You don’t think I would? You seem to forget who you’re dealing with baby!”
Kevin’s eyes widened. He could feel panic slowly taking over his body at the mere prospect of facing Eli and telling him that he’d basically been stalking him for most of his life. Kevin must’ve started hyperventilating because Kiseop was quick to walk around the table and trap Kevin in his arms.
“Whoa there, Kev! Are you okay?”
“I-I can’t do this!” There was a note of hysteria crawling into Kevin’s normally calm voice. Kiseop began rubbing soothing circles on his back.
“Kevin, I’m not doing this to make you freak out! I’ve been watching you pine after him for what feels like centuries! This isn’t healthy!” Kiseop exclaimed. Kevin shook his head.
“I’m… I just can’t! But it’s going to be even worse if he hears it from someone else, isn’t it.” Kevin bit his lower lip. Kiseop nodded.
“I can’t stand to watch you tear yourself up over someone you think you can never have. It’s time you made a move towards making yourself happy. You deserve it.”
Part 2
Genre: Romance, Slight angst
Pairing: Elvin, Past Vinseop, Minor SooSeop
Warnings: MalexMale, children everywhere!
Disclaimer: I don't own the boys... Not even a little bit...
Summary: It only took some green paint in preschool to make Kevin fall, but it took 23 years and meddlesome Kiseop for Kevin to confess.
A/N: Um... Yeah... Remember when I mentioned being swamped by tests and projects? Well it turned into a waterfall and I have not been able to write anything legit for the past two weeks. Then my editor went on vacation for a week and didn't want to post anything without her stamp of a approval because she is ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL!! I realize that TLOF should be my priority, but this monster has been my baby for the past month, and I could not write TLOF and this at the same time. So here I give you the first of many TLOF based oneshots. I know many people probably wanted one that involved SuJu, since TLOF is a Kyumin story, but it just really doesn't mesh well for any of the SuJu ones I have planned to post them this early. That and my Elvin muse has been prodding me with a fork... So you guys get Elvin! Anyway, TLOF updates WILL resume either this week or next week, granted school does not try to kill me again! Enjoy!
Paint
Another summer had passed, ushering the coming of fall. Kevin could feel the chill working its way through his body, a cool breeze tousling his chestnut brown hair. He rubbed his arms, lightly bouncing in his spot on the playground. Toddlers with far too much energy than should be normal ran around and in between his legs, clearly not affected by the weather as much as he was.
“Most people would think to grab a coat before running out into November weather.” A hand perched itself on his shoulder, rubbing it tenderly. Kevin shoved his hands into his apron pockets.
“I was late this morning. My microwave exploded, Eeteuk. Exploded. The last thing I was thinking about was bringing a jacket.” Kevin shivered. Eeteuk sighed.
“Are you alright?”
“Tired, but okay. The burning tinfoil didn’t kill me…” Kevin pouted. Eeteuk rubbed soothing circles on his back.
“Well, at least now you’ll know that tin foil and microwaves create fire murder,” Eeteuk laughed.
“Fine, laugh at my expense,” Kevin mumbled.
“Aw, I’m not laughing at you. Really, don’t give me that look,” Eeteuk chided. Kevin rolled his eyes, but smiled nonetheless.
“Did you have a reason for coming out here? Aren’t you supposed to be in a meeting with our fearless leader?”
“Changmin pushed it back. And you were doing that ‘I’m in love with you but I can’t tell you’ thing so I thought I would come and push you out of that funk.”
Kevin bit his lower lip, allowing his gaze to drift away from Eeteuk and fall on another person standing on the opposite side of the playground. He was tall and broad, everything Kevin wished he could be. Normally, most people would call that admiration, and normally it would be. But Kevin had spent too long trying to tell himself that only to be hit in the heart when he realized he’d fallen hard. It was one thing to admire someone’s muscled arms and an entirely different thing to want those same arms to wrap around you and never let go.
The person looked up and met Kevin’s eyes. A sly smile made its way across his face, as the children played around his legs. Kevin gave his own shy smile, only breaking eye contact when he felt Eeteuk place a hand on his shoulder.
“Goodness, the sexual tension out here is thick!”
Kevin closed his eyes.
“Eeteuk, can you just… not?”
“Not what? Imply that you’ve been holding a torch for him for the past four years? Because I have no intention of stopping that anytime soon,” Eeteuk chuckled.
Actually Kevin had been “holding a torch” for much longer than four years, but he wasn’t about to tell Eeteuk that.
“Eli doesn’t-“
“Doesn’t what? Like you? Want to make sweet, uncensored love to you?”
“EETEUK!!” Kevin covered his face in embarrassment.
“What? You’re not making any sense!” Eeteuk threw his hands up in exasperation.
“We’re just friends! That’s not going to change anytime soon!” Kevin exclaimed.
“Well of course it’s not going to change if you’re not going to do anything about it!” Eeteuk spread his hands in front of him. Kevin went silent. Eeteuk looked at the other man contemplatively, wondering whether or not to speak. They stood next to each other in silence.
“He…”
Eeteuk looked at his companion. Kevin was looking down, an uncharacteristically morose look on his face.
“He… doesn’t remember me…”
Kevin looked down at his hands, white teeth chewing his lower lip like they usually did when he was deep in thought.
“Kevin?”
Kevin awoke from his daze. He smiled reassuringly at Eeteuk.
“Don’t worry about it. Eli and I are friends, and that’s the way it’ll stay.”
“Even if it tears you apart?” Eeteuk spoke softly.
“It won’t be the first time I’ve been disappointed in life. I’ll be fine; don’t worry. Now, I’m going to go clean up inside before the terrors come back in for snack time.” Kevin flounced off before Eeteuk could protest. There was a flawless smile playing on his lips, but he felt anything but happy.
The classroom was typical of a preschool: messy, and colorful, essentially an overload to the senses. Toys strewn about the carpet painfully poked Kevin’s thin-soled shoes as he walked across the room to clean the tables left in a less than clean state. The nearby easel had what Kevin assumed was a cat… dog… thing messily painted on it. The brightly colored paints lay on the table, completely innocent, though the mess that had been created on the table was enough to make any mother weep. Kevin’s eyes swept the primary colors, sighing when he realized the mess had been fabricated in an attempt to form other colors than the ones that were provided. A wry smile bloomed on his face as his hand reached down to pluck the blue pot from the table.
Why don’t they ever have any green?
OoO
Clumsy, chubby fingers reached for the blue, intending to smear it all over their artistic masterpiece. When Kevin could not find it, he began to look around for it, wildly turning his head to find the elusive paint. He found it in someone else’s hands and frowned.
“Hey! That’s mine!” He called out. The other person turned, a wicked smile playing on otherwise innocent lips.
“This isn’t yours! I found it on the table! I can use it if I want!”
Kevin’s lips trembled. That was his paint… His mommy had given it to him yesterday as a birthday present…
“It’s mine! My mommy gave it to me! I need it to finish my painting!” Kevin slowly got up. His puffy hands were balled up at his sides in a show of childish anger only a toddler could conjure. The other toddler waddled over to take a look at his painting, the same cruel smile lighting his face.
“It’s ugly! You don’t need any more paint! You’ll just make it uglier!”
Those words cut through Kevin like a machete through the Amazon forest. Large tears began to form at the corners of the boy’s soft brown eyes. He sat back down, looking at his painting.
“I worked hard on it…” Kevin whispered, tears close to falling down his face. The bully laughed.
“It’s just a mess! Your mommy wouldn’t want to see it!”
Kevin hiccupped, tears slowly coursing down his face. He’d just wanted to make his mommy something to thank her… Why wasn’t it good enough?
“Hey, what are you doing!”
Kevin looked up at the bully’s shout, eyes wide with surprise. A bigger boy had taken Kevin’s blue paint from the other toddler and was walking towards Kevin. He kneeled down, holding Kevin’s beloved paint in front of him.
“This is yours, right?”
Kevin nodded, but didn’t take it. He continued staring at his feet. The boy was confused by Kevin’s actions and tried to shove the paint forward so it was practically under Kevin’s chin.
“You don’t want it?”
“My painting isn’t pretty…” Kevin trailed off, looking at his painting. It was supposed to be his house with him and his mommy, but he didn’t have any green. He’d wanted to add blue to make up for the green he didn’t have, but then the bully…
“Why do you think that?” The boy asked.
“He said it was ugly,” Kevin’s lip trembled again. The boy frowned and looked at Kevin’s painting.
“Well I think it looks great! It just needs some more colors!” The boy exclaimed. He dragged a chair to sit down beside Kevin. Kevin looked at him curiously.
“But I only have red, yellow, and blue. How can I add more colors?”
The boy grinned. He grabbed a nearby plastic tray with multiple indents in it. He poured a bit of each of the three colors and did something revolutionary. He began to mix them. Suddenly vibrant orange and lime green erupted from the tray. Kevin gasped in wonder.
“Wow! I didn’t know you could do that!”
“Isn’t it cool? Now you can add a bajillion colors to your painting!”
Kevin laughed, eagerly dipping his brush into the green to smear it in an imitation of grass. He laughed again when the color bloomed across his paper. He turned back to the boy.
“It looks awesome! Your mommy is really gonna like it!” The boy exclaimed. Kevin’s eyes sparkled as he smiled.
“You promise?”
“I promise”
Two chubby pinkies tangled in an innocent promise.
OoO
“You do know that the paint is for the kiddies to play with, right?”
Kevin started, nearly dropping the paint in the process. He quickly put the blue paint back on the table. With a sheepish smile Kevin faced the intruder.
“I got distracted.”
Eli walked forward, placing a friendly arm around Kevin’s shoulders. Kevin tried not to jump at the close contact.
“Aw, was Kevin jealous of the kids that get to play with paint all day? Do you want naptime too?”
Kevin pushed Eli away, grinning at Eli’s antics. The man laughed, losing his balance for a moment but regaining it quickly.
“I was just thinking about when I was a kid. I used to play with the paint all the time. I would never play with the toys like the other kids. The teachers tried to pull me away from the easel so many times, but they could never keep me away,” Kevin recounted. His eyes dropped back to the nostalgia inducing paints, gaze softening as he recalled the memory of the boy who’d helped him learn how to mix the colors of the rainbow. Even now, he could still recall the broad shouldered four-year-old that had fought off bullies for him and helped him smile.
“You like art, right?”
Kevin looked back at Eli. The other seemed slightly nervous, fidgeting in his spot.
“I wouldn’t have majored in art if I didn’t,” Kevin responded. For some reason, Eli’s nervous behavior was rubbing off on Kevin. He could feel his heart begin to pound, though it was nothing new for him. Every time Eli so much as sent him a look, Kevin could feel himself flush a little pinker and fall a little harder.
“Well I was wondering, if you were free… we could go to the art museum this weekend.” Eli had trained his eyes on the nearby windows, not quite looking at Kevin. “We haven’t hung out in a while, and my friend gave me tickets to see the new gallery that’s gonna open.”
“I would love to,” Kevin breathed, unable to contain the fluttering in his chest. A true smile broke over his soft features. Eli smirked.
“There it is.”
“What?”
“You’ve been oddly withdrawn lately. Has everything been okay?” Eli’s eyebrows drew together in worry. Kevin shook his head.
“No, I’m fine, just a little stressed. I’m still trying to find a job, and my mom’s been kind of sick lately, so I’ve been worrying. But there’s nothing wrong!” Kevin waved his hands in front him.
“Why don’t you tell me these things?” Eli sighed.
“There’s nothing to tell. And I wouldn’t want to burden you with my problems. I know you’ve got it hard enough as it is… How is your sister doing anyway?” Kevin explained.
“I see you trying to change the subject, so don’t think you’re getting off the hook! But she’s fine. She’s starting in Seoul University this year.” Eli couldn’t help the pride rolling off his persona. Kevin placed a hand on the other’s shoulder.
“I’m happy for you. You worked hard so she could go. Your parents holding up okay?”
“They’re constantly chirping about how proud they are that they could get at least one of their children into college. They always felt bad that I couldn’t go ‘cause money was tight, so at least this lightens their hearts a little. But now that Angie’s in she has to work doubly hard for the both of us.” Eli shrugged.
“I’m sure they’re proud of you too. You’re the only reason she could go. I admire you for that.” Kevin allowed his hand to trail down Eli’s arm in a soothing gesture, though he really shouldn’t have let himself get so close to Eli in the first place.
“I admire you too.” Eli’s eyes met Kevin’s with an intensity that completely caught the shorter of the two off guard. His breath caught in his throat. Eli was way too close now, his face mere inches from Kevin’s. Kevin wanted to say anything to dispel the way he was spellbound with no hope of moving.
“Alright kiddies, back in the room! Hop to it!”
Eeteuk’s voice washed over Kevin like bucket of cold water to the face, and he shook himself out of his trance. He looked sheepishly at Eli.
“I should go help Teukkie.” Kevin didn’t give Eli a chance to respond, knowing that the moment Eli opened his mouth he would completely lose his focus. With quick, long strides he made his way to the hallway to help usher in the kids. When he returned to the room, Eli had already left. Kevin tried to tell himself that the disappointment he felt was stupid.
“You did a great job of cleaning up here… I don’t even want to know what your room looks like at home,” Eeteuk teased. The classroom was still a mess due to Eli’s intervention, but that didn’t seem to deter the toddlers from playing with the toys.
“I know; I’m sorry. I got caught up.”
“Do I even need to ask who caught you
Kevin groaned and buried his face in his hands.
OoO
Kevin sized himself up in the mirror. Clean uniform, check. Flawless face, check. Styled hair, check. He was ready for his first day of high school.
He quickly ran down the stairs, reaching the kitchen in a breathless state. His mother looked up from her cooking. She smiled, placing a bowl of rice in front of her son.
“My, aren’t we excited? Are you sure you didn’t forget anything?”
Kevin shook his head, attempting to talk in between bites of his rice and the various side dishes his mother had prepared.
“I checked it all last night before I went to bed. I am one hundred percent prepared!”
“That’s my boy. Now, make sure you aren’t late.”
Kevin nodded vigorously, making short work of his breakfast. His mother watched him with a fond smile on her face. She remained quiet, watching him bustle around, tugging on brand new shoes and his favorite jacket. As he was about to leave she caught his arm.
“Kevin.”
Kevin gave her a curious look. She seemed worried, the frown lines around her mouth more apparent. They made her look older, a fact that shocked Kevin.
“Please be careful. If anything happens, please tell me. I don’t want you getting hurt like last time.”
“It won’t come to that. Not this time. I promise.”
“But please. For the sake of your old mother. I only want you to be safe.” She squeezed the hand she held captive.
“Okay mom. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
With that, Kevin was out the door and walking towards his new high school. Kevin had studied hard to get into this school; not only did it have outstanding academic standing, but it held one of the most esteemed high school art programs in the country. He’d spent months living and breathing study guides and test prep, and to finally be wearing the uniform of the prestigious school was a much needed confidence boost.
The brunette had spent most of his middle school years evading bullies who thought he was too girly, too pretty, too artsy to be around everyone else who’d been deemed normal. He’d suffered through having his lunch thrown in his face, being harassed in the locker rooms, and almost being beat up on multiple occasions. Kevin refused let them win. He kept going to school, even getting the best grades in his class, though his true passion lay with the power of a paintbrush. He’d spent many an hour painting his life away in the art room when the bullies got to be too much. And now he was here, walking to his new escape from uneducated bullies who could never understand the true ability of paint on a canvas.
Arriving at the campus, Kevin took a deep breath, letting a smile light his features. Walking confidently, he took in the trees lining the beautiful outside of the school. Unfortunately, Kevin was far too dazed by his surroundings to notice the ball heading towards his head and the accompanying warning.
“Watch out!”
The unsuspecting teen was hit in the head with a soccer ball. The force of the ball knocked him to the ground with a cry. Kevin landed on his butt, his bag falling a ways away from him. For a moment, Kevin saw stars dancing in his vision. He closed his eyes, gripping his head with a groan. This was not the reality he’d wanted.
“Shit man, I’m sorry! Are you okay?”
Kevin felt someone kneel next to him. Kevin opened his eyes to glare at the person, but his voice caught in his throat.
He was gorgeous: all tan muscle and sculpted cheekbones. A mop of jet black hair swirled with the wind, showing penetrating brown eyes. Strong hands gripped his shoulder and arm, their hold firm but gentle at the same time. Despite the fact that Kevin swore he’d never met a more handsome man in his life, he couldn’t shake the fact that he looked familiar.
“Crap, I must’ve hit you really hard for you to still be in shock. Can you stand?”
Kevin nodded, trying to speak, but only managing a vague squeak. Kevin’s cheeks colored at the embarrassing noise, but the other only smiled kindly. Kevin scrambled up, eager to stop making a fool of himself. The teen looked around, locating Kevin’s bag and picking it up.
“This is yours, right?”
That was when it hit Kevin. Those same words had been spoken to him eleven years ago by a four year old much larger than him who’d taught him how to smile and how to paint, a four year old with a confident smirk and sparkle in his eye…
A four year old that looked very much like the teen in front of him.
For the second time that day Kevin found himself unable to locate his voice. He took the bag from the other, eyeing him curiously. He was completely sure that he was the same toddler that he’d met in preschool. The question was if he recognized Kevin. But that didn’t seem to be the case. As soon as the other handed Kevin his bag, he clapped him on the shoulder and said:
“Again, I’m sorry. I’ll aim better next time, yeah?”
It was when he turned to leave the Kevin found his voice suddenly returned to him.
“Wait! What’s your name?”
The teen stopped, turned, and gave Kevin a salute.
“Eli.”
And he was gone to join his friends, leaving Kevin with a dirtied uniform and a pounding heart.
OoO
Eli didn’t regret bringing Kevin to the art exhibit for one second. Though the man was normally bright and happy, it had been clear that something had been bogging him down as of late. In his own element, Kevin flitted between paintings and sculptures, constantly mumbling to himself in thought. The miniscule smile that played on the brunette’s lips was the first sliver of true happiness Eli had seen in weeks. Seeing Kevin so light was like a breath of fresh air for Eli, his worry at his friend’s behavior dissipating. Because that’s what Kevin was: just a friend.
Eli shook his head, irritated; it was becoming more and more difficult to fend off these thoughts that he may think of Kevin as more than just his kind coworker who had the patience of a saint. Now he was the man who could make his heart mimic a horse during a race with just a simple look his way. Of course Kevin had no idea that he held such a power over him, and Eli intended to keep it that way.
Kevin stood in front of a painting, nose wrinkled cutely in thought, a single hand tucked under his chin. His mouth moved in a jumbled mumble of words so quiet that Eli could barely hear him. The blonde took an almost sadistic pleasure in jumping him out of his reverie.
“What are you so deep in thought for?” Eli clapped a hand on his shoulder. Predictably Kevin jumped, shooting Eli a dirty look, which really was on par with the look of a soaked kitten.
“I was just looking at the painting; it’s been a while since the artist in me has had a chance to come out so I’m enjoying it while it lasts,” Kevin said, sounding particularly sad, though he tried to smile through it.
“Well, I think…erm… the colors… show a great loneliness and ah, suffering.” Eli closed his eyes, trying to seem like the authority on art. It was totally worth it to make a fool of himself if only he could hear Kevin laugh more often.
“Such insight professor Kim! Please, impart more of your wisdom upon me,” Kevin giggled. Eli tried to ignore the fluttering in his stomach.
“Direct your eyes to this paint stroke right here. The vertical motion indicates the artist’s anger towards life for its unfair treatment. You can see this through how deep the stroke is and how it is the only yellow in the image. Are you taking notes?” Eli glanced at Kevin though corner of his eyes. The other man nodded eagerly.
“Of course! This’ll be on the test right?”
“Absolutely! Make sure to be thorough. This is a very in depth analysis.” Eli could barely keep the smile off his face. Kevin’s body was wracked with uncontrollable laughter, which Eli quickly followed. It took them a while to calm down. When Kevin finally regained control of his ability to speak he gave Eli a meaningful look.
“Thank you for taking me here. I don’t think I’ve had so much fun in ages!”
“It’s no problem. You’ve been kinda down lately. It sucks to see you like that, especially when you’re usually the bright spot in my day.” Eli wasn’t sure if he’d said something wrong when Kevin looked down, suddenly downcast.
“I’m sorry, I really don’t want you to worry about me. I’m fine!”
“It’s okay to admit that you need help sometimes. I’ll be there when you need me. I want you to trust me, choose me when you feel like you need support.” Eli couldn’t help but feel that he was about to step over a line that he’d set for himself but then Kevin looked at him so brokenly, and Eli suddenly didn’t care.
“Eli, I-“
“Kev baby, is that you?”
For the love of all things holy!
Kevin whirled around, eyes widening comically when he saw a beanpole of a man heading towards them.
“Kiseop!”
Ki-who now?
Kevin was gone in a matter of seconds, practically launching himself into the other man’s arms. Eli had never wanted to hurt someone more than at that moment.
“Baby, I’ve missed you! It’s been ages!” This Kiseop was doing a good job of making Eli want to grab his head and smash it in the ground. Acting all familiar with Kevin… Who the hell was this guy!
“What are you doing here?” Kevin slowly pulled away.
“You didn’t know? This is my gallery. I painted everything here.” Kiseop opened his arms with a flourish. The man was dressed to the T in a suit and purple dress shirt, looking quite chic… if Eli hadn’t already deemed him an asshole.
“What? Really? That’s amazing Kiseop! I’m so proud of you!” Kevin leaned in for another hug, leaving Eli to fight with his violent urges to rip Kiseop a new one. When Kiseop pulled away he seemed to finally notice Eli’s existence.
“And who is this, baby?” Kiseop motioned towards Eli.
“I’m Eli Kim, Kevin’s coworker,” Eli introduced, cutting Kevin off. Strangely, a sly smirk wove itself onto Kiseop’s face.
“Eli huh? Is he--?” Kiseop looked at Kevin curiously. Kevin sent him a warning glance, looking uncharacteristically stern though it seemed his countenance was colored with a hint of fear. Kiseop’s smirk got impossibly wider, his eyebrows rising up in tandem with the motion.
“I see. So Eli… Have you seen any of Kevin’s paintings? They’re fabulous I assure you.”
“K-Kiseop!”
Eli watched the way Kevin jumped at Kiseop’s statement.
“No, I haven’t, but I’d like to.” Though Eli was talking to Kiseop, his eyes were firmly trained on Kevin.
“You really should have him show you sometime. He has some very interesting techniques. I think you would find them quite… enlightening.”
Kiseop knew something. Something that Kevin didn’t want Eli to know. Something that Kiseop wanted Eli to know. Something that was important.
“Kiseop.”
The man in question looked at Kevin, noticing the pleading look he was giving him. Some sort of nonverbal communication seemed to have passed in between them and Kiseop sighed, shrugging his shoulders.
“Fine baby, you win. Do you want me to show you around?”
“That would be lovely. Come on Eli.” Kevin’s stance relaxed. Kiseop began to lead Kevin, Eli following resignedly. But before Kiseop fully turned, he shot Eli a meaningful look, as though letting him know that there was definitely something he needed to know. Eli sighed, feeling a migraine slowly growing in his head; it was going to be a long day.
Art show week was always a drag. It meant a week of teachers emphasizing how art was a form of expression, of freedom. Eli scoffed. He could express himself just fine with stick figures; he didn’t need to know how to paint a bowl of fruit to feel free. Unfortunately his teachers didn’t seem to feel the same, forcing trip after trip upon her students to the art show masterfully located in the gym. And there was another reason to hate the art show; it got rid of his favorite sports during gym, relocating his class to the track for various tiring workouts.
And so, it was one such day that found Eli idly walking through with his partner in crime, AJ, and making derogatory comments wherever he went.
“Is that a penis?”
“… I think it’s a chef’s hat.”
“Are you serious?”
“It could be a mushroom…”
“Was it a guy who made it?”
AJ peered at the nametag, seeing a decidedly male name on the piece of cardboard.
“It’s a guy.”
“Then it’s definitely a penis.”
“Does everything have to look like a penis to you?”
“I’m a teen in the throws of puberty and hormone rage; of course everything looks like a penis to me,” Eli snorted. AJ rolled his eyes.
“So manly.”
“Don’t you know it!”
“Have you ever thought that you should just keep your mouth shut sometimes?”
“And have you miss out on the opportunity to listen to my glorious voice?”
“You’re a dick.”
Eli only laughed at AJ’s dry statement, finding so much truth in it. With enough hormones running through his system to knock out a cow, the only thing he could really think of was sex, giving even the simplest thing he looked at a sexual connotation. It was only natural that AJ would feel the need to call him a dick, since that was all they talked about. Well, that and vaginas… couldn’t forget that.
“Hey smart one. Since you’re so eager to talk, what does this look like?”
AJ had gone out of his way to pick the most monotonous painting he could find. The entire thing was composed of only green with varying hues swirling around. There was a placard below the painting containing a description and the artists name, but Eli couldn’t give two shits about the fail explanation that the student had given to cover his ass for how bad of a painting he’d made.
“What the hell AJ? What is this even supposed to be?” Eli furrowed his eyebrows. AJ shrugged his shoulders.
“Since you have so much to say, I thought I should ask you, O wise one.”
“It’s green… What the hell is it supposed to mean?”
“Well you were acting so high and mighty two seconds ago…”
“Whatever AJ…” Eli rolled his eyes.
“So much for your supposed wisdom,” AJ chuckled, leaving Eli to stare at the failure of a painting. It was so annoying. The thing was just green but somehow it merited being called art? Painters were so overrated these days.
Eli began to walk away, but then he was compelled by some bizarre force to look back right before turning the corner. What had originally been the lamest painting transformed itself with Eli’s realization. Within the painting strokes were letters, letters that shook Eli to the core. Those letters spelled his name, in flowing strokes that would easily be missed if seen up close. Eli felt the need to get away from the painting, feeling frantic and suddenly unsure. He walked away from the painting in his panic, failing to notice the nervous soft brown eyes that trailed his departure.
OoO
“It’s been awhile Kiseop,” Kevin stated, sitting himself down at the booth. Following their meeting at the gallery, Kiseop had insisted that they meet up the next day to catch up. Kevin had agreed, partially because he really did want to talk to Kiseop, but mostly because he knew that if he didn’t the artist would not hesitate to track him down and interrogate him about his life. Kiseop was truly a force to be feared…
“I know it’s been hard. I would’ve tried to stay in contact more, but things got hectic with the exhibit so I’ve been really busy. I’m really happy I saw you at the gallery yesterday, baby.” Kiseop leaned forward to rest his chin on his hand.
“Me too. I’m glad you found a way in; I’ve been stuck looking for a job,” Kevin sighed. Kiseop’s hand automatically reached out to comfort him. Kevin smiled feebly.
“Well it doesn’t look like it’s too bad for you. I mean you get to hang out with that Eli hunk all day! Of course the screaming children probably ruin whatever sexy vibe you have going on there.” Kiseop shook his head in mock pity. Kevin groaned.
“Kiseop, there’s nothing going on between us!”
“Your lack of confidence is going to kill you one day, I swear! God, you were difficult when I was dating you, but I’m starting to think that you’re even more insufferable now!” Kiseop threw his hands up in exasperation.
“… I’m sorry…”
Kiseop looked over at Kevin, internally wincing at the way Kevin was hanging his head and staring determinedly at his coffee cup.
“Shit, Kevin I didn’t mean it that way. You know I love you, right?”
“Even now, I feel terrible for leading you on the way I did. I never meant to hurt you,” Kevin sighed, eyes refusing to meet Kiseop’s.
“No baby, I was the one that insisted. I was the one who was too blind to realize that you would never love me. You did tell me that you could never love me the way I had loved you, I just didn’t want to believe you.” Kiseop shook his head. He quickly brightened, and began to rummage through his coat pocket for something. He pulled out his cellphone, rapidly scrolling through the pictures to and pushing the screen into Kevin’s face. The day care worker took the phone, studying the picture with a curious frown. The man in the picture smiled at him without a care in the world.
“His name is Soohyun. He’s my boyfriend. We began dating six months ago.”
Kevin looked up in surprise. The gentlest smile Kevin had ever seen graced Kiseop’s face.
“I’m happy for you. Things seem to be looking up, huh?” Kevin chuckled, though it sounded weak even in his own ears. Kiseop nodded.
“I didn’t show you that to rub it in your face. I wanted to let you know that I’ve moved on. I don’t regret going out with you for a second, but it was destined to end eventually. I can’t compete with a 23-year old love, especially one as powerful as yours.” Kiseop reached out to take his phone back from Kevin. “I’ve gotta say though that you’re certainly dedicated. Eli will be lucky to have you.”
“It’s never going to happen-“
Kiseop cut Kevin off by raising his index finger. Kevin furrowed his eyebrows.
“I’ve moved on and it’s time you do the same. I’m not going to watch you make yourself miserable, so I’m giving you a choice. You tell him how you feel in one week, or else I will.”
“Wh-what! That’s not fair! You wouldn’t!” Kevin gasped. A scary smile crawled onto Kiseop’s face.
“You don’t think I would? You seem to forget who you’re dealing with baby!”
Kevin’s eyes widened. He could feel panic slowly taking over his body at the mere prospect of facing Eli and telling him that he’d basically been stalking him for most of his life. Kevin must’ve started hyperventilating because Kiseop was quick to walk around the table and trap Kevin in his arms.
“Whoa there, Kev! Are you okay?”
“I-I can’t do this!” There was a note of hysteria crawling into Kevin’s normally calm voice. Kiseop began rubbing soothing circles on his back.
“Kevin, I’m not doing this to make you freak out! I’ve been watching you pine after him for what feels like centuries! This isn’t healthy!” Kiseop exclaimed. Kevin shook his head.
“I’m… I just can’t! But it’s going to be even worse if he hears it from someone else, isn’t it.” Kevin bit his lower lip. Kiseop nodded.
“I can’t stand to watch you tear yourself up over someone you think you can never have. It’s time you made a move towards making yourself happy. You deserve it.”
Part 2