Instead of just a baby, lets plan to have twins together next time. ha-ha. People say the most random things where pregnancy is concerned. Sounds like your canned response is perfect
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An afternoon for myself would be good. I do feel rejuvenated when I do this. I just need to find the time.
I agree that I should think about what a good aunt, wife, friend, etc. I am, but sometimes I don't put as much clout in these things as paying work. I think it's because when I was growing up, making money and prestige from your job were important. In other people, I think these are great and important qualities. In myself, it's like, "Well, sure, you may be these things, but that's a given. What else can you do beside these?" So, you're right, shouldn't be my own enemy. It's hard to not be critical of one-self.
PS- have you tried yoga, pilates or meditation? Sometimes that's helpful, too. It's not about the money you spend to shake it up, just that you do something different that puts a little pizzazz in you life and changes your mind or your perception or your perspective (and it doesn't have to be all-brainy, either, like, you study some remote culture in Africa- unless you've really been wanting to learn that)...
I like the "shaking it up" idea. I do feel better sometimes when I buy a new lipstick. It's silly I know, but there's something about it. I don't wear other make up, and a good lipstick just makes me feel all pretty. Also like the yoga idea. I've been thinking about this and want to find a time to incorporate some kind of good destressing exercise.
I don't know why a person would say something like that about your wanting to have a baby soon. Some people are just stupid and ignorant. I try to avoid people like that at all costs because they are not worth your time, effort, or thoughts.
For your post about "thing 2", let me just say that I totally admire you for writing a novel and now moving on to a second one. I think that is such an amazing talent and I am in awe of you for having the discipline to work from home on such a major project.
Don't doubt yourself. You are wonderful! Love, Michelle
thing 1- people are stupid- i agree with adriene- we are in prime marriage/making making time- nobody is copying off of the other- this is just life and we are all growing up- your responses are perfect
thing 2- let me just say that i can't wait to read your novels- i know you'll be successful :-) i also agree with jenn- is there something that you enjoy? a hobby or something that you can do when you are feeling a bit down- something that relaxes you?- sometimes us girls can be very critical of ourselves- especially when our bodies start changing (they say after 30 it all changes! and being 30- yikes! im beginning to see it! i'm not burning the fat like i used to!) know that you are a beuatiful person both inside and out, and keep telling yourself that! and keep yourself healthy- you need to be strong when it's baby time!
Re: sorry this is long!--My reply is long too:-)freelancemargieMarch 28 2006, 17:09:14 UTC
Thank you for this post!! Until I read it, I thought I was the only person who needed her husband to say, "good job." I don't know where I got the idea that the "perfect" man is supposed to praise me all the time 'cause if he's not it means I'm doing something wrong, but that's the idea I have. With my parents, my mom worked outside the home, then came home and had dinner ready for my dad, then served him and washed the dishes while he watched TV. I don't believe he said thank you much. This seemed to be cultural and generational to me, but I always swore I'd never have a life like that. So I think if Stu doesn't say thank you to a meal or clean house or whatever, I get all bristly because I feel like I'm living the life I said I wouldn't. Something to think about for me
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I agree that I should think about what a good aunt, wife, friend, etc. I am, but sometimes I don't put as much clout in these things as paying work. I think it's because when I was growing up, making money and prestige from your job were important. In other people, I think these are great and important qualities. In myself, it's like, "Well, sure, you may be these things, but that's a given. What else can you do beside these?" So, you're right, shouldn't be my own enemy. It's hard to not be critical of one-self.
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ok, now I'm rambling!!
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Thanks:-)
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Oh, so you talked to my obnoxious neighbor?
Just kidding.
I don't know why a person would say something like that about your wanting to have a baby soon. Some people are just stupid and ignorant. I try to avoid people like that at all costs because they are not worth your time, effort, or thoughts.
For your post about "thing 2", let me just say that I totally admire you for writing a novel and now moving on to a second one. I think that is such an amazing talent and I am in awe of you for having the discipline to work from home on such a major project.
Don't doubt yourself. You are wonderful!
Love,
Michelle
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thing 2- let me just say that i can't wait to read your novels- i know you'll be successful :-) i also agree with jenn- is there something that you enjoy? a hobby or something that you can do when you are feeling a bit down- something that relaxes you?- sometimes us girls can be very critical of ourselves- especially when our bodies start changing (they say after 30 it all changes! and being 30- yikes! im beginning to see it! i'm not burning the fat like i used to!) know that you are a beuatiful person both inside and out, and keep telling yourself that! and keep yourself healthy- you need to be strong when it's baby time!
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