look like th' innocent flower, but be the serpent under 't for exothermc
Title: Look like th' innocent flower, But be the serpent under 't
Recipient: exothermc
Pairing: Ken/Hongbin
Rating: PG-13
Wordcount: 1, 907
Warnings: Mentions of violence and mental illness, prison environment and [spoiler (click)]character death
Summary: Jaehwan tries to resist, but his belief in fate is too strong.
Fate is a construct created by those who choose to find meaning in everything, Ken however, did not believe in fate or other 'pointless' beliefs.
He believed in coincidence.
When Jaehwan was greeted by a prisoner's smile from across the steel bars in the prison Jaehwan almost faltered in his work, it was as if his cold and harsh manner had been melted away and in its place was a soft gooey substance meant for the weak-hearted. Fraternising with prisoners was severely forbidden and Jaehwan didn't dare break that rule, but it didn't mean who couldn't at least look at them, right? It wasn't as if Ken usually ever wanted to look at the prisoners due to their harsh (and frankly ugly) appearances and cold glares. But this prisoner was different. Nervous almost.
Jaehwan noticed the deep dimples of the prisoner as his hand shook when taking the tray of food and Jaehwan almost wanted to leave his station and help the prisoner who looked so innocent and helpless, however at that point Jaehwan still had his morals in check.
Days later when doing his nightly shifts he noticed a hand reach out of the bars, as if trying to pluck an imaginary flower from its roots. But upon closer inspection he noticed that the whoever it was, was trying to pick up a golden chain that had fallen on the floor.
"Hey jackass, jewellery is not permitt-" Jaehwan was hesitant to continue when he saw the tears on the same prisoner's face fall to the floor, the sound was so small yet it felt as if it echoed for years because of how pained the poor prisoners expression was.
"P-please, it's the only picture of my sister that I have left," he sobbed into a bitten fist, "just let me have this one thing."
Conscious of whether any of his co-workers were watching, Jaehwan slowly slid the necklace through the steel bar gates with his foot, "That's the only favour you'll ever receive from me." he croaked slowly before walking away. Kindness had never been in Jaehwan's character, which was one of the reasons he chose to be a prison guard, so that he was allowed to act like a dick 24:7 and not get reprimanded for it, but somehow Jaehwan couldn't find the strength to carry on his dick-ish ways when it came to prisoner 42067.
It didn't take long for Jaehwan to learn of the young prisoner's name. Lee Hongbin, convicted of first-degree murder.
Jaehwan hadn't intended to ask Wonshik about prisoner 42067, at least that's what he told himself as he asked, "What is up with 42067? He looks like sex on a stick, what's he stuck in here for, prostitution or something?"
Wonshik chuckled darkly "Oh, Lee Hongbin? He committed first degree murder of approximately fifteen different people, an employed serial killer - assassin I guess - by trade, although he doesn't look it, does he?" he mumbled between the bites of his sandwich, "he stands out compared to all the other psycho's in here, surprised he hasn't gotten beaten up yet."
A feeling of uneasiness spread through Jaehwan's body, he didn't understand how such a young man with such angelic looks could possibly be an assassin. As a newly trained prison officer of three months, Jaehwan couldn't quite come to terms with such a fact.
Only a week later Jaehwan felt a hand grip onto him through the bars, he was about to reach for his tayser before he saw who the hand belonged to and didn't quite have the heart to pull out the weapon, "Do you want a tazer up your ass?" he barked.
"Ah sorry... I just wanted to thank you for returning my necklace to me. It's my most prized possession and the only thing that holds me together while having to live with all these whack-jobs," Hongbin smiled crookedly, making Jaehwan's heart flutter.
"Yeah well, don't make it a habit, I won't pick it up for you next time," he grumbled before carrying on with his rounds.
But it happened again, numerous times, Jaehwan knew that it was on purpose though he never quite
had the heart to ignore Hongbin’s requests to pick up his necklace. On one occasion Hongbin asked for Jaehwan's name.
"Why do you need to know that?" he questioned.
"Well I need to call you by something right? And 'officer' sounds a bit too distant. I like to know the people who keep me under lock and key everyday," and because of the smirk on Hongbin's lips, Jaehwan could hardly refuse.
A few days later he caught Hongbin in the midst of changing, he realised that Hongbin probably noticed the halt in his footsteps and felt like an idiot for showing his attraction towards the other so easily.
"Like what you see?" Hongbin bit his lip, the change of character from when Jaehwan first met him and now, was so contrasting that Jaehwan was concerned as to whether Hongbin had a split personality order or not. He asked that very question hours later in the office.
"What? 42067? Wait let me check his files..." Wonshik tapped the keyboard on his office computer.
"The psychiatric report of last month shows that his mental state is currently undetermined, the psych's seem to be pretty fond of him though, they send him over there at least twice a week, as Hakyeon put it he seems to find Hongbin 'fascinating' and a true 'cold blooded psychopath'," he made quotation marks with his hands before typing away again and rolling his eyes said, "well that's was his reasoning last week anyway, but if I'm honest I think Hakyeon just has this creepy crush on him. I'll never get psychiatrists, sometimes they seem just as psycho as the inmates. Who the hell would want to get with a cold-blooded murderer? Just thinking about it gives me the creeps."
Jaehwan could only laugh awkwardly before leaving the room feeling less at ease than he had previously. The gaze of the angelic looking prisoner through the steel bars of the prison was still imprinted in Jaehwan's mind and he felt disgusted with himself for it. Too many times had Jaehwan interacted with prisoner 42067 and although it was only a small attraction, Jaehwan couldn't let the guilt eating away at him for his feelings continue like this. Or so he told himself.
But as 'coincidence' (or the fate that Jaehwan was slowly starting to have more and more conviction in) had it, in the second week of July, Jaehwan was doing the Psych run - which meant he was supposed to chauffeur prisoners by van to the psychiatric ward half an hour away, which meant that Jaehwan was going to be in a car, with Hongbin, for over half an hour.
Hongbin was practically thrown into the truck by the discontented officer, instead of being scared or angered by such an action he simply laughed happily, as if Jaehwan had told him a very funny joke.
"What's got on your tether today? Never seen you in such a bad mood before," Hongbin noted, seizing the opportunity to size Jaehwan up, as he grumbled away while starting the van.
Five minutes into the journey and it felt as if you could cut the tension in the van with a knife, it was so silent that Jaehwan almost reached for the radio - which was against protocol - but hesitated when Hongbin suddenly started talking.
"I didn't do it you know," Hongbin sighed, "I'm stuck in this hell hole because I got framed, I don't know how I got into this mess, but I want you to know, Jaehwan, that I'm not a bad person." The look Hongbin gave Jaehwan was filled with such sincerity that Jaehwan couldn't bear to doubt him.
After that Jaehwan didn't feel so guilty for his interactions with Hongbin, occasionally he would slip the prisoner some extra food and other little things, since Hongbin persuaded Jaehwan of his innocence, they had become very close, too close for any sort of professionalism to be found.
"What do you think of fate?" Hongbin asked one psych trip (as Jaehwan seemed to be getting stuck with more of them these days).
Dumbfounded Jaehwan spluttered, "I used to think there was no such thing, but I guess recently it doesn't seem like such a myth anymore."
"Why's that?" Hongbin wondered.
Although the voice in Jaehwan's head was screaming so loud, every muscle in Jaehwan's body pulled him towards Hongbin and so, their lips met. Needless to say Hongbin was late to his psychiatric meeting that day.
"I'm going to appeal." Hongbin firmly stated one afternoon while Jaehwan was on supervision duty for inmate's outside time, "I'm sick of this hell hole and I think they might consider it, do you think you could book a meeting for me with Han Sanghyuk? Another inmate said he was the best of the best for appeals and you want to help me get out of here right?"
"More than anything," Jaehwan sighed running a hand through Hongbin’s hair, "I doubt Wonshik would ever let the appeal go through but I might be able to get you an appointment if we go through Hakyeon."
Wonshik's disdain for prisoner 42067 was made very obvious, whenever he passed Hongbin's cell he would give that cold gaze of no remorse, as if Hongbin was a blood-thirsty piece of trash that deserved to be locked up, somehow Jaehwan could never understand why.
One day Jaehwan asked him about it, "Why do you hate 42067 so much? I swear I see lasers coming out of your eyes every time you look at him."
Shrugging Wonshik stated, "I was present at one of his psychiatric meetings - he's another kind I tell you, complete and utter nut job."
Jaehwan refused to believe it.
It was only days later that Jaehwan booked an appointment for Hongbin with Han Sanghyuk - although he had never heard of such a lawyer and couldn't find any references online, Hongbin assured Jaehwan that Sanghyuk was the best of the best and simply needed to call a number (given by Hongbin) to book an appointment.
On the drive to said appointment did Jaehwan finally proclaim his love for Hongbin - it had been a year since the two had first met and Jaehwan finally felt confidence in their relationship despite all the odds against them. He had told Hongbin that it was indeed fate - that they were fated together and that Jaehwan had never met another like Hongbin. Yet he was surprised when Hongbin did not say "I love you" back, he just smiled lightly and said "I'm really excited for this appointment."
It was twenty minutes into the appointment that the bomb exploded. Luckily far enough away from Jaehwan that he could escape with only a few burns on his back, he ran through the parking lot towards his van when he saw two figures approach - Hongbin and someone who he supposed was Sanghyuk.
"Oh thank God you're alright," Jaehwan choked out, "I was so worried."
Hongbin wore that same smile he had the first time they met, before raising his gun towards Jaehwan's head, "Thanks for the ride." He called before pulling the trigger.
Jaehwan may have believed in fate. But Hongbin didn't, he believed in luck, and waiting for that golden opportunity.
Notes: based off of the prompts: "☆ something based in this line of bangtan's danger (not the actual song tho): "you’re a con-artist, a criminal who shook up my heart / you used up my heart before the fire even started" A LITERAL ONE....... PLEASE............" and "☆ ken/hongbin based on taemin's danger lyrics............ i'll cry..... especially "i’ll approach you like a flower, dig into you like a thorn" because thats what hongbin is...." thanks to the mods for creating this wonderful fic exchange! <3
Recipient: exothermc
Pairing: Ken/Hongbin
Rating: PG-13
Wordcount: 1, 907
Warnings: Mentions of violence and mental illness, prison environment and [spoiler (click)]character death
Summary: Jaehwan tries to resist, but his belief in fate is too strong.
Fate is a construct created by those who choose to find meaning in everything, Ken however, did not believe in fate or other 'pointless' beliefs.
He believed in coincidence.
When Jaehwan was greeted by a prisoner's smile from across the steel bars in the prison Jaehwan almost faltered in his work, it was as if his cold and harsh manner had been melted away and in its place was a soft gooey substance meant for the weak-hearted. Fraternising with prisoners was severely forbidden and Jaehwan didn't dare break that rule, but it didn't mean who couldn't at least look at them, right? It wasn't as if Ken usually ever wanted to look at the prisoners due to their harsh (and frankly ugly) appearances and cold glares. But this prisoner was different. Nervous almost.
Jaehwan noticed the deep dimples of the prisoner as his hand shook when taking the tray of food and Jaehwan almost wanted to leave his station and help the prisoner who looked so innocent and helpless, however at that point Jaehwan still had his morals in check.
Days later when doing his nightly shifts he noticed a hand reach out of the bars, as if trying to pluck an imaginary flower from its roots. But upon closer inspection he noticed that the whoever it was, was trying to pick up a golden chain that had fallen on the floor.
"Hey jackass, jewellery is not permitt-" Jaehwan was hesitant to continue when he saw the tears on the same prisoner's face fall to the floor, the sound was so small yet it felt as if it echoed for years because of how pained the poor prisoners expression was.
"P-please, it's the only picture of my sister that I have left," he sobbed into a bitten fist, "just let me have this one thing."
Conscious of whether any of his co-workers were watching, Jaehwan slowly slid the necklace through the steel bar gates with his foot, "That's the only favour you'll ever receive from me." he croaked slowly before walking away. Kindness had never been in Jaehwan's character, which was one of the reasons he chose to be a prison guard, so that he was allowed to act like a dick 24:7 and not get reprimanded for it, but somehow Jaehwan couldn't find the strength to carry on his dick-ish ways when it came to prisoner 42067.
It didn't take long for Jaehwan to learn of the young prisoner's name. Lee Hongbin, convicted of first-degree murder.
Jaehwan hadn't intended to ask Wonshik about prisoner 42067, at least that's what he told himself as he asked, "What is up with 42067? He looks like sex on a stick, what's he stuck in here for, prostitution or something?"
Wonshik chuckled darkly "Oh, Lee Hongbin? He committed first degree murder of approximately fifteen different people, an employed serial killer - assassin I guess - by trade, although he doesn't look it, does he?" he mumbled between the bites of his sandwich, "he stands out compared to all the other psycho's in here, surprised he hasn't gotten beaten up yet."
A feeling of uneasiness spread through Jaehwan's body, he didn't understand how such a young man with such angelic looks could possibly be an assassin. As a newly trained prison officer of three months, Jaehwan couldn't quite come to terms with such a fact.
Only a week later Jaehwan felt a hand grip onto him through the bars, he was about to reach for his tayser before he saw who the hand belonged to and didn't quite have the heart to pull out the weapon, "Do you want a tazer up your ass?" he barked.
"Ah sorry... I just wanted to thank you for returning my necklace to me. It's my most prized possession and the only thing that holds me together while having to live with all these whack-jobs," Hongbin smiled crookedly, making Jaehwan's heart flutter.
"Yeah well, don't make it a habit, I won't pick it up for you next time," he grumbled before carrying on with his rounds.
But it happened again, numerous times, Jaehwan knew that it was on purpose though he never quite
had the heart to ignore Hongbin’s requests to pick up his necklace. On one occasion Hongbin asked for Jaehwan's name.
"Why do you need to know that?" he questioned.
"Well I need to call you by something right? And 'officer' sounds a bit too distant. I like to know the people who keep me under lock and key everyday," and because of the smirk on Hongbin's lips, Jaehwan could hardly refuse.
A few days later he caught Hongbin in the midst of changing, he realised that Hongbin probably noticed the halt in his footsteps and felt like an idiot for showing his attraction towards the other so easily.
"Like what you see?" Hongbin bit his lip, the change of character from when Jaehwan first met him and now, was so contrasting that Jaehwan was concerned as to whether Hongbin had a split personality order or not. He asked that very question hours later in the office.
"What? 42067? Wait let me check his files..." Wonshik tapped the keyboard on his office computer.
"The psychiatric report of last month shows that his mental state is currently undetermined, the psych's seem to be pretty fond of him though, they send him over there at least twice a week, as Hakyeon put it he seems to find Hongbin 'fascinating' and a true 'cold blooded psychopath'," he made quotation marks with his hands before typing away again and rolling his eyes said, "well that's was his reasoning last week anyway, but if I'm honest I think Hakyeon just has this creepy crush on him. I'll never get psychiatrists, sometimes they seem just as psycho as the inmates. Who the hell would want to get with a cold-blooded murderer? Just thinking about it gives me the creeps."
Jaehwan could only laugh awkwardly before leaving the room feeling less at ease than he had previously. The gaze of the angelic looking prisoner through the steel bars of the prison was still imprinted in Jaehwan's mind and he felt disgusted with himself for it. Too many times had Jaehwan interacted with prisoner 42067 and although it was only a small attraction, Jaehwan couldn't let the guilt eating away at him for his feelings continue like this. Or so he told himself.
But as 'coincidence' (or the fate that Jaehwan was slowly starting to have more and more conviction in) had it, in the second week of July, Jaehwan was doing the Psych run - which meant he was supposed to chauffeur prisoners by van to the psychiatric ward half an hour away, which meant that Jaehwan was going to be in a car, with Hongbin, for over half an hour.
Hongbin was practically thrown into the truck by the discontented officer, instead of being scared or angered by such an action he simply laughed happily, as if Jaehwan had told him a very funny joke.
"What's got on your tether today? Never seen you in such a bad mood before," Hongbin noted, seizing the opportunity to size Jaehwan up, as he grumbled away while starting the van.
Five minutes into the journey and it felt as if you could cut the tension in the van with a knife, it was so silent that Jaehwan almost reached for the radio - which was against protocol - but hesitated when Hongbin suddenly started talking.
"I didn't do it you know," Hongbin sighed, "I'm stuck in this hell hole because I got framed, I don't know how I got into this mess, but I want you to know, Jaehwan, that I'm not a bad person." The look Hongbin gave Jaehwan was filled with such sincerity that Jaehwan couldn't bear to doubt him.
After that Jaehwan didn't feel so guilty for his interactions with Hongbin, occasionally he would slip the prisoner some extra food and other little things, since Hongbin persuaded Jaehwan of his innocence, they had become very close, too close for any sort of professionalism to be found.
"What do you think of fate?" Hongbin asked one psych trip (as Jaehwan seemed to be getting stuck with more of them these days).
Dumbfounded Jaehwan spluttered, "I used to think there was no such thing, but I guess recently it doesn't seem like such a myth anymore."
"Why's that?" Hongbin wondered.
Although the voice in Jaehwan's head was screaming so loud, every muscle in Jaehwan's body pulled him towards Hongbin and so, their lips met. Needless to say Hongbin was late to his psychiatric meeting that day.
"I'm going to appeal." Hongbin firmly stated one afternoon while Jaehwan was on supervision duty for inmate's outside time, "I'm sick of this hell hole and I think they might consider it, do you think you could book a meeting for me with Han Sanghyuk? Another inmate said he was the best of the best for appeals and you want to help me get out of here right?"
"More than anything," Jaehwan sighed running a hand through Hongbin’s hair, "I doubt Wonshik would ever let the appeal go through but I might be able to get you an appointment if we go through Hakyeon."
Wonshik's disdain for prisoner 42067 was made very obvious, whenever he passed Hongbin's cell he would give that cold gaze of no remorse, as if Hongbin was a blood-thirsty piece of trash that deserved to be locked up, somehow Jaehwan could never understand why.
One day Jaehwan asked him about it, "Why do you hate 42067 so much? I swear I see lasers coming out of your eyes every time you look at him."
Shrugging Wonshik stated, "I was present at one of his psychiatric meetings - he's another kind I tell you, complete and utter nut job."
Jaehwan refused to believe it.
It was only days later that Jaehwan booked an appointment for Hongbin with Han Sanghyuk - although he had never heard of such a lawyer and couldn't find any references online, Hongbin assured Jaehwan that Sanghyuk was the best of the best and simply needed to call a number (given by Hongbin) to book an appointment.
On the drive to said appointment did Jaehwan finally proclaim his love for Hongbin - it had been a year since the two had first met and Jaehwan finally felt confidence in their relationship despite all the odds against them. He had told Hongbin that it was indeed fate - that they were fated together and that Jaehwan had never met another like Hongbin. Yet he was surprised when Hongbin did not say "I love you" back, he just smiled lightly and said "I'm really excited for this appointment."
It was twenty minutes into the appointment that the bomb exploded. Luckily far enough away from Jaehwan that he could escape with only a few burns on his back, he ran through the parking lot towards his van when he saw two figures approach - Hongbin and someone who he supposed was Sanghyuk.
"Oh thank God you're alright," Jaehwan choked out, "I was so worried."
Hongbin wore that same smile he had the first time they met, before raising his gun towards Jaehwan's head, "Thanks for the ride." He called before pulling the trigger.
Jaehwan may have believed in fate. But Hongbin didn't, he believed in luck, and waiting for that golden opportunity.
Notes: based off of the prompts: "☆ something based in this line of bangtan's danger (not the actual song tho): "you’re a con-artist, a criminal who shook up my heart / you used up my heart before the fire even started" A LITERAL ONE....... PLEASE............" and "☆ ken/hongbin based on taemin's danger lyrics............ i'll cry..... especially "i’ll approach you like a flower, dig into you like a thorn" because thats what hongbin is...." thanks to the mods for creating this wonderful fic exchange! <3