Between The Gaps; 01
Title: Between The Gaps
Author: forever_smilez
Pairing: Yoochun/Junsu
Length: Short Story [01/04]
Genre: Angst, lots of angst!
Rating: PG
Summary: All Junsu needed to do was read between the lines and he would find it. Could Yoochun make him realise before it was too late?
Warning: Mpreg-ish. Like I meantioned it's a really angsty fic, so if you don't like that kind of stuff then this fic is not for you :)
A/N: reality bounds me from fanfic world and updating regularly! :( I am trying my hardest to get it out, I even write during my breaks at work! :D
This chapter may confuse you even more, BUT the next chaper will bring it together! Enjoy~~! (ok should go get ready for work now...)
Twitter @forever_smilezx ♥
Previous chapter: 00
He watches over the young child sitting in the corner fidgeting on the hem of his ragged cardigan sipping on a bottle of juice. A smile looms upon the five year old’s face as he notices his father looking in his direction. Despite everything, there he sat with no care in the world; they lived their lives with constant uncertainty, every step they took lead them to a path that could just end with a snap of a finger. The young child oblivious of the real world around him takes each stride with such confidence that even his father envies.
Daddy, where are going?
On an adventure.
It was because of him that his son lived with such confidence, it was him that his child lived with the everlasting smile upon his face, it was him that wished his son never grew up to face the reality of what life was really like for the both of them. They were simply on an everlasting adventure.
A sudden cough erupts, cutting through the surrounding sounds of city streets which are now murmurs to them in which they’ve grown accustom to. A cough so raw and painful that every breath he takes burns the length of his throat, every swallow gets harder and harder. The feeling of what normal or healthy was forgotten many weeks ago.
~~~~~~
They shake hands after another successful meeting with a now full on board client.
“Thank you very much for this opportunity Mr Yoon.”
“Please, it’s Jaeshin, and it’s a pleasure Yoochun-shi. I look forward to see what you come up with.”
Yoochun calls for the bill as he opens up his wallet.
“Let me.”
“No, it’s okay.”
“Really, I insist. You can save it for a special someone.”
Jaeshin smiles as he points to Yoochun’s open wallet, the older man pays the bill, bows politely and leaves. Yoochun’s delayed reaction sees him bowing back to thin air.
But I have nothing to save up for...
He fingers run over the photo safely protected behind the transparent coat. The photo left untouched for the past five years, one in which he would never replace, the photo of the person he longed to see again one day. Whether in this world or the afterlife, he yearns to see him, even if it was just for a moment. Yoochun rolls the ring around his finger.
A moment to tell him that it was a journey they should have walked together.
~~~~~~
“Hey thief! Stop!”
The young child runs as fast as his little legs would allow him to.
“Somebody stop that rascal!”
He dodges through people along the busy streets; open arms which reach out to catch him become failed attempts. He expertly twists around the outline of their bodies, crawling under open arms and legs. Clutching onto the stolen goods tightly, he looks over his shoulder. People were slowly disappearing off into the distance, he smiles at another successful ‘shop’.
“Whoa, slow down there kid.”
The young boy crashes into the arms of a stranger.
“S-Sorry Sir.”
A familiar shopkeeper calls out to Yoochun, “Yoochun-ah, don’t let that kid out of your hands.”
Their eyes locked. The little boy starts scuffling under Yoochun’s hold whilst the older man remains his secure grip. The paper bag rustles under the boy’s arm, a bag of oranges and cough medicine hidden on the side.
It was like instinct completely took over him, what was right and wrong was fighting in his mind so quickly that he couldn’t think straight. His instant reaction was to loosen his grip letting the child slip away…
Was it right to let the young thief go? Or was it right to stop him from tending to someone possibly really ill?
~~~~~~
He returns to their ‘home’ of three days, the longest they had stayed in a fixed location. Huddled in the corner, his father sleeps unaware of his son’s actions in the last hour.
“Daddy…”
The young child shakes his father awake. The adult stirs and murmurs an “mmhh Jinwoo-ah?” he opens his eyes and is met with the adoring eyes of his son, the soft smile creeps upon Jinwoo face as his open arms presents his father with the medicine and fruits.
“What is this?”
“Medicine, to make you better.”
“Where did you get it from?”
“From that ajusshi’s shop.”
“That ajusshi?”
“The one you go to…”
And it dawned on him. The father whom Jinwoo looked up to, whom he respected, who actions he mimicked and followed to the tee, he was entering the realms of reality, the place he was far too young to enter.
“You…Jinwoo-ah, do you know it’s wrong to take things from other people without paying?”
“But…it was from ajusshi’s shop…”
“Whether it’s ajusshi or anyone else’s shop, it’s wrong! You cannot take from other people, it’s bad and if you get caught the police will take you away from me. You’re never to do that again, ok?!”
The child bites his lower lip and swallows hard whilst tears threaten to fall. Yet all it took was one blink and tears refused to stop.
Teaching his son the right and wrongs of life was a tough job for any parent, but even tougher for this parent. No guidance, no one to lean on, no one to help out when things were tough and in this environment, it was extremely hard for him.
How could he teach his son life’s wrongs and rights when Jinwoo was simply following the footsteps of his respected father? He had no right.
He embraces Jinwoo tightly. “You’re a child and cannot do what adults do, it dangerous. I can’t let you get hurt, you have to always stay by myself ok. Don’t ever leave my side?”
Hour by hour. Day by day. It gets harder and harder for the both of them to survive, through blustering winds, through dangerous alleyways, through people looking down at them; they had to endure everything thrown at them.
“Daddy, where are we going?”
“Somewhere fun! A well deserved break from our adventure.”
“But I don’t want a break from our adventure, I want to explore more!”
“It’s just for one night, somewhere warm and bright with music, you like music don’t you?”
“Can we dance?”
“…yeah sure you can dance.”
“I was dancing today….but without the music.” Jinwoo giggles innocently not realising the depths of his words.
“Really?”
“Yeah, the people had their arms out ready to get me, we were all moving like this daddy…” he mimicked his to-ing an fro-ing from side to side.
“Dancing with strangers? What have I told you about strangers Jinwoo-ah?”
“Never talk and hang around with strangers. But I didn’t, I ran away from them, one of them catched me but then he let me go after I started dancing again.”
“You got caught?”
“He let me go and I ran away, I didn’t talk to him daddy.”
“Why did he let you go?”
“Ajusshi told him to not let me go, but he did.”
“He knew the ajuss-”
“Daddy look…” Jinwoo tugged on his father’s jacket.
“Yes son?”
“There’s the ajusshi’s friend…”
~~~~~~
Yoochun swivels the ice around his glass as he looks out onto the nightlife of Seoul.
The thoughts of the young child run through his mind in a constant cycle, the thought of a boy so young roaming the streets alone, stealing from people, becoming an easy target that could subsequently fall into the wrong arms.
It went from one thought to another, delving deeper into the ‘who, what, where, when and hows’ of the young stranger’s potential way of life.
He watches the passerbys along the street, for each individual he saw he found at least something he was in envy of.
The young man walking alone with his hands occupied with bagful of take out food, he must have a family waiting at home for him.
The couple in the coffee house opposite, hand in hand, laughing like there were no cares in the world.
The family passing by, the little girl on her father’s shoulders whilst her mum follows protectively behind supporting her daughter’s body.
The young child pointing towards his direction from across the street mouthing words to his father as he tugs on his jacket. The man crouches down beside him and follows the imaginary line between his son’s fingers and Yoochun.
His eyes widen in shock as his feels his heart skip a beat.
Yoochun feels as though his heart had been snatched from his body. His fingers loosens against the glass as it leaves his touch shattering once it hits the hard surface of the table, the concoction of alcohol, glass and ice spilling over the edges escaping his reach along with the pain that came rushing back.
He fumbles over vacant chairs, dodging through newly arrived customers and out into the cold evening. Yoochun searches over the other side of the road, left and right, but they had suddenly disappeared.
He rushes across the busy road causing cars to abruptly halt to a screeching stop inches away from his body but has no effect on him whatsoever. He hurries along the street in the direction where the majority of passerbys were heading towards. He peeps over people’s heads, breaks through people’s hand chains, in and out of small roads he searches.
He had no idea where he was going or when to give up but he just ran. He ran and ran; faster, harder, longer, because he had never forgave himself for stopping that day. He needed to run, he needed to find them. He had to.
~~~~~~
“Did we win?”
“Eh?”
“The race against time, you said if we made it here on time we would win. Did we daddy?”
“Yeah son, we made it just on time. We won.”
He takes another look around before he follows his son into the public bathhouse.
Jinwoo stirs in his sleep. He drifts in and out of the dream world that his mind lets him run free to, the world where his father wishes his son could stay in, and the reality of passing cars, police sirens and drunken passerbys and the sudden fear of getting caught out. Today was the first night in a very long time where he could provide his son one tiny moment of luxury; Jinwoo was too young to remember the feeling of having a warm place to stay, a proper wash, and some good food. It was only a public bathhouse, but it was a palace in the eyes of father and son.
Leaving his son in his deep slumber, he popped out for some fresh air. The air in which his son and himself had lived in for the past five years, it had become a norm that when he was stuck indoors, he felt like he was suffocating.
He breathed the air in deeply, the sharp pain suddenly found its way back into his throat causing him to cough violently.
A hand reaches out to him handing him a tissue. The pain, as if right on cue, slowly faded away. He looks up…
“J…Junsu-ah.”
Next Chapter: 02
Author: forever_smilez
Pairing: Yoochun/Junsu
Length: Short Story [01/04]
Genre: Angst, lots of angst!
Rating: PG
Summary: All Junsu needed to do was read between the lines and he would find it. Could Yoochun make him realise before it was too late?
Warning: Mpreg-ish. Like I meantioned it's a really angsty fic, so if you don't like that kind of stuff then this fic is not for you :)
A/N: reality bounds me from fanfic world and updating regularly! :( I am trying my hardest to get it out, I even write during my breaks at work! :D
This chapter may confuse you even more, BUT the next chaper will bring it together! Enjoy~~! (ok should go get ready for work now...)
Twitter @forever_smilezx ♥
Previous chapter: 00
He watches over the young child sitting in the corner fidgeting on the hem of his ragged cardigan sipping on a bottle of juice. A smile looms upon the five year old’s face as he notices his father looking in his direction. Despite everything, there he sat with no care in the world; they lived their lives with constant uncertainty, every step they took lead them to a path that could just end with a snap of a finger. The young child oblivious of the real world around him takes each stride with such confidence that even his father envies.
Daddy, where are going?
On an adventure.
It was because of him that his son lived with such confidence, it was him that his child lived with the everlasting smile upon his face, it was him that wished his son never grew up to face the reality of what life was really like for the both of them. They were simply on an everlasting adventure.
A sudden cough erupts, cutting through the surrounding sounds of city streets which are now murmurs to them in which they’ve grown accustom to. A cough so raw and painful that every breath he takes burns the length of his throat, every swallow gets harder and harder. The feeling of what normal or healthy was forgotten many weeks ago.
~~~~~~
They shake hands after another successful meeting with a now full on board client.
“Thank you very much for this opportunity Mr Yoon.”
“Please, it’s Jaeshin, and it’s a pleasure Yoochun-shi. I look forward to see what you come up with.”
Yoochun calls for the bill as he opens up his wallet.
“Let me.”
“No, it’s okay.”
“Really, I insist. You can save it for a special someone.”
Jaeshin smiles as he points to Yoochun’s open wallet, the older man pays the bill, bows politely and leaves. Yoochun’s delayed reaction sees him bowing back to thin air.
But I have nothing to save up for...
He fingers run over the photo safely protected behind the transparent coat. The photo left untouched for the past five years, one in which he would never replace, the photo of the person he longed to see again one day. Whether in this world or the afterlife, he yearns to see him, even if it was just for a moment. Yoochun rolls the ring around his finger.
A moment to tell him that it was a journey they should have walked together.
~~~~~~
“Hey thief! Stop!”
The young child runs as fast as his little legs would allow him to.
“Somebody stop that rascal!”
He dodges through people along the busy streets; open arms which reach out to catch him become failed attempts. He expertly twists around the outline of their bodies, crawling under open arms and legs. Clutching onto the stolen goods tightly, he looks over his shoulder. People were slowly disappearing off into the distance, he smiles at another successful ‘shop’.
“Whoa, slow down there kid.”
The young boy crashes into the arms of a stranger.
“S-Sorry Sir.”
A familiar shopkeeper calls out to Yoochun, “Yoochun-ah, don’t let that kid out of your hands.”
Their eyes locked. The little boy starts scuffling under Yoochun’s hold whilst the older man remains his secure grip. The paper bag rustles under the boy’s arm, a bag of oranges and cough medicine hidden on the side.
It was like instinct completely took over him, what was right and wrong was fighting in his mind so quickly that he couldn’t think straight. His instant reaction was to loosen his grip letting the child slip away…
Was it right to let the young thief go? Or was it right to stop him from tending to someone possibly really ill?
~~~~~~
He returns to their ‘home’ of three days, the longest they had stayed in a fixed location. Huddled in the corner, his father sleeps unaware of his son’s actions in the last hour.
“Daddy…”
The young child shakes his father awake. The adult stirs and murmurs an “mmhh Jinwoo-ah?” he opens his eyes and is met with the adoring eyes of his son, the soft smile creeps upon Jinwoo face as his open arms presents his father with the medicine and fruits.
“What is this?”
“Medicine, to make you better.”
“Where did you get it from?”
“From that ajusshi’s shop.”
“That ajusshi?”
“The one you go to…”
And it dawned on him. The father whom Jinwoo looked up to, whom he respected, who actions he mimicked and followed to the tee, he was entering the realms of reality, the place he was far too young to enter.
“You…Jinwoo-ah, do you know it’s wrong to take things from other people without paying?”
“But…it was from ajusshi’s shop…”
“Whether it’s ajusshi or anyone else’s shop, it’s wrong! You cannot take from other people, it’s bad and if you get caught the police will take you away from me. You’re never to do that again, ok?!”
The child bites his lower lip and swallows hard whilst tears threaten to fall. Yet all it took was one blink and tears refused to stop.
Teaching his son the right and wrongs of life was a tough job for any parent, but even tougher for this parent. No guidance, no one to lean on, no one to help out when things were tough and in this environment, it was extremely hard for him.
How could he teach his son life’s wrongs and rights when Jinwoo was simply following the footsteps of his respected father? He had no right.
He embraces Jinwoo tightly. “You’re a child and cannot do what adults do, it dangerous. I can’t let you get hurt, you have to always stay by myself ok. Don’t ever leave my side?”
Hour by hour. Day by day. It gets harder and harder for the both of them to survive, through blustering winds, through dangerous alleyways, through people looking down at them; they had to endure everything thrown at them.
“Daddy, where are we going?”
“Somewhere fun! A well deserved break from our adventure.”
“But I don’t want a break from our adventure, I want to explore more!”
“It’s just for one night, somewhere warm and bright with music, you like music don’t you?”
“Can we dance?”
“…yeah sure you can dance.”
“I was dancing today….but without the music.” Jinwoo giggles innocently not realising the depths of his words.
“Really?”
“Yeah, the people had their arms out ready to get me, we were all moving like this daddy…” he mimicked his to-ing an fro-ing from side to side.
“Dancing with strangers? What have I told you about strangers Jinwoo-ah?”
“Never talk and hang around with strangers. But I didn’t, I ran away from them, one of them catched me but then he let me go after I started dancing again.”
“You got caught?”
“He let me go and I ran away, I didn’t talk to him daddy.”
“Why did he let you go?”
“Ajusshi told him to not let me go, but he did.”
“He knew the ajuss-”
“Daddy look…” Jinwoo tugged on his father’s jacket.
“Yes son?”
“There’s the ajusshi’s friend…”
~~~~~~
Yoochun swivels the ice around his glass as he looks out onto the nightlife of Seoul.
The thoughts of the young child run through his mind in a constant cycle, the thought of a boy so young roaming the streets alone, stealing from people, becoming an easy target that could subsequently fall into the wrong arms.
It went from one thought to another, delving deeper into the ‘who, what, where, when and hows’ of the young stranger’s potential way of life.
He watches the passerbys along the street, for each individual he saw he found at least something he was in envy of.
The young man walking alone with his hands occupied with bagful of take out food, he must have a family waiting at home for him.
The couple in the coffee house opposite, hand in hand, laughing like there were no cares in the world.
The family passing by, the little girl on her father’s shoulders whilst her mum follows protectively behind supporting her daughter’s body.
The young child pointing towards his direction from across the street mouthing words to his father as he tugs on his jacket. The man crouches down beside him and follows the imaginary line between his son’s fingers and Yoochun.
His eyes widen in shock as his feels his heart skip a beat.
Yoochun feels as though his heart had been snatched from his body. His fingers loosens against the glass as it leaves his touch shattering once it hits the hard surface of the table, the concoction of alcohol, glass and ice spilling over the edges escaping his reach along with the pain that came rushing back.
He fumbles over vacant chairs, dodging through newly arrived customers and out into the cold evening. Yoochun searches over the other side of the road, left and right, but they had suddenly disappeared.
He rushes across the busy road causing cars to abruptly halt to a screeching stop inches away from his body but has no effect on him whatsoever. He hurries along the street in the direction where the majority of passerbys were heading towards. He peeps over people’s heads, breaks through people’s hand chains, in and out of small roads he searches.
He had no idea where he was going or when to give up but he just ran. He ran and ran; faster, harder, longer, because he had never forgave himself for stopping that day. He needed to run, he needed to find them. He had to.
~~~~~~
“Did we win?”
“Eh?”
“The race against time, you said if we made it here on time we would win. Did we daddy?”
“Yeah son, we made it just on time. We won.”
He takes another look around before he follows his son into the public bathhouse.
Jinwoo stirs in his sleep. He drifts in and out of the dream world that his mind lets him run free to, the world where his father wishes his son could stay in, and the reality of passing cars, police sirens and drunken passerbys and the sudden fear of getting caught out. Today was the first night in a very long time where he could provide his son one tiny moment of luxury; Jinwoo was too young to remember the feeling of having a warm place to stay, a proper wash, and some good food. It was only a public bathhouse, but it was a palace in the eyes of father and son.
Leaving his son in his deep slumber, he popped out for some fresh air. The air in which his son and himself had lived in for the past five years, it had become a norm that when he was stuck indoors, he felt like he was suffocating.
He breathed the air in deeply, the sharp pain suddenly found its way back into his throat causing him to cough violently.
A hand reaches out to him handing him a tissue. The pain, as if right on cue, slowly faded away. He looks up…
“J…Junsu-ah.”
Next Chapter: 02