FIC: Pakalolo
Title: Pakalolo
Pairing: Steve/Danny
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 500
Author's Note: Written for the sd_ldws challenge: genre crack, prompt baking.
Summary: Steve is horny when he's high.
"Good, you're back. Did he cause any trouble?" Danny asks the second Steve slides into the passenger seat. Outside his window, Toast lazily gives them the shaka sign and heads back inside.
"It went fine, Danno." Steve turns to him with a goofy smile and eyes glazed black, staring at some point on Danny's forehead.
Danny's jaw drops. "You did not." He peers into Steve's face and swears. "I told him to get you information, not get you baked! Toast, that freaking hippie moron, I'm going to kill him."
"It's all good, Danno," Steve says, still gazing at him with that stupid grin. "I got the files, Danno. Everything's under control, Danno."
"Why do you keep saying my name?"
"Feels nice. In my mouth." Steve touches his lips with his fingers and stares down at them going a little cross-eyed in the process.
"Okay. Wow. You are high like a mofo. I'm taking you home." Danny shakes his head, yanks on the gear shift and speeds out of the driveway.
Steve frowns. "We have to go to HQ."
"Forget it. You are not going back to work high."
"It's no big deal." Steve says. "I used to get high all the time."
"Whoa. Excuse me? If you value your face, you will reassure me that my tax dollars have not been spent on pot."
Steve shakes his head. "Back in high school. I don't anymore."
"Until today, you mean. God, Steve, you smell like a head shop."
Steve whips off his shirt and tosses in the back.
"What- what are you doing?"
"It's on all my clothes." Steve says and proceeds to remove his pants.
"That's not an excuse for you to strip!" Danny yelps.
Steve tugs on the lever that pushes the seat back as far as it can go. Danny dares a glance to see Steve sprawled wearing nothing but his boxers and socks. There's a thin sheen of sweat from his Steve's chest down to his stomach and lower into-
A honk jerks Danny back into his lane.
He grits his teeth, forcing his attention back on the road. "Steven. Will you put your clothes back on, please?"
"Only if we go back to the office."
"Are you kidding me?"
"I got Toast to do the thing. Remotely disable the security cameras. In the interrogation room."
Danny does a double take. "What?"
"Does that count as tampering with government property?"
"You bet your ass it does. What the fuck, Steve?"
"We could be there. For hours. And no one would know."
"Hold on. Illegal substance abuse. Public indecency. Reckless driving. All this because you want to have sex at work?"
"Um, aren't you driving?"
"Are you out of your mind?!"
Steve dangles his cuffs on one finger. "C'mon. You know I've always wanted you to-"
"Don't you dare say it."
"-book me, Danno."
"I am going to kill him. First, I am going to fuck you back to your senses and then I'm going to kill him."
Pairing: Steve/Danny
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 500
Author's Note: Written for the sd_ldws challenge: genre crack, prompt baking.
Summary: Steve is horny when he's high.
"Good, you're back. Did he cause any trouble?" Danny asks the second Steve slides into the passenger seat. Outside his window, Toast lazily gives them the shaka sign and heads back inside.
"It went fine, Danno." Steve turns to him with a goofy smile and eyes glazed black, staring at some point on Danny's forehead.
Danny's jaw drops. "You did not." He peers into Steve's face and swears. "I told him to get you information, not get you baked! Toast, that freaking hippie moron, I'm going to kill him."
"It's all good, Danno," Steve says, still gazing at him with that stupid grin. "I got the files, Danno. Everything's under control, Danno."
"Why do you keep saying my name?"
"Feels nice. In my mouth." Steve touches his lips with his fingers and stares down at them going a little cross-eyed in the process.
"Okay. Wow. You are high like a mofo. I'm taking you home." Danny shakes his head, yanks on the gear shift and speeds out of the driveway.
Steve frowns. "We have to go to HQ."
"Forget it. You are not going back to work high."
"It's no big deal." Steve says. "I used to get high all the time."
"Whoa. Excuse me? If you value your face, you will reassure me that my tax dollars have not been spent on pot."
Steve shakes his head. "Back in high school. I don't anymore."
"Until today, you mean. God, Steve, you smell like a head shop."
Steve whips off his shirt and tosses in the back.
"What- what are you doing?"
"It's on all my clothes." Steve says and proceeds to remove his pants.
"That's not an excuse for you to strip!" Danny yelps.
Steve tugs on the lever that pushes the seat back as far as it can go. Danny dares a glance to see Steve sprawled wearing nothing but his boxers and socks. There's a thin sheen of sweat from his Steve's chest down to his stomach and lower into-
A honk jerks Danny back into his lane.
He grits his teeth, forcing his attention back on the road. "Steven. Will you put your clothes back on, please?"
"Only if we go back to the office."
"Are you kidding me?"
"I got Toast to do the thing. Remotely disable the security cameras. In the interrogation room."
Danny does a double take. "What?"
"Does that count as tampering with government property?"
"You bet your ass it does. What the fuck, Steve?"
"We could be there. For hours. And no one would know."
"Hold on. Illegal substance abuse. Public indecency. Reckless driving. All this because you want to have sex at work?"
"Um, aren't you driving?"
"Are you out of your mind?!"
Steve dangles his cuffs on one finger. "C'mon. You know I've always wanted you to-"
"Don't you dare say it."
"-book me, Danno."
"I am going to kill him. First, I am going to fuck you back to your senses and then I'm going to kill him."