Ficathon Fic: Icarus Is Just This Boy I Know
Title: Icarus Is Just This Boy I Know
Author: sparky77 (Q)
Pairing: Peter/Nathan
Rating: R
Spoilers: None
Notes: Written for muzivitch for the Peter/Nathan Spring Hiatus Fic-a-thon. My prompt was Part of Nathan wishes that Peter would grow up and realize how the world. I kind of took the prompt and then made a right turn and then I think maybe jumped off a cliff. This is on the dark side which I apologize for and I will totally write something happy to make up for it. Huge thanks to linaerys for organizing the ficathon and finitejester37 for putting up with me and the awesome beta job.
***The story of Icarus that Nathan tells Peter is mostly based on Bulfinch's version along with bits and pieces of other versions of the story and my own embellishments.
There is a story that Nathan likes to tell about Peter. It’s not true, but he’s told the story so many times that he thinks even Peter believes it to be true.
In the story, Nathan tries to teach Peter how to play Cowboys and Indians, but Peter has a long talk with the Cowboys about understanding other cultures and he persuades the Indians to sign a peace treaty. Next, Nathan tries to teach Peter how to play Cops and Robbers, but the cops learn about victims’ rights and the robbers all reform and find constructive ways to contribute to society.
Details are important when telling a convincing story, so Nathan makes sure to mention the way Peter had looked wearing a cowboy hat that was far too big for him. He carefully describes how Peter had looked so serious, the cowboy hat perched precariously on his head, one sudden movement from tipping down and covering half his face, biting his lip and frowning while trying to make the world a better place for all the imaginary cops, robbers, cowboys, and Indians.
Everyone loves that story. They laugh, or at least smile politely, because it sounds like something Peter would have done as a child. It sounds true and that’s enough. No one ever wonders where Peter found a cowboy hat in the perfectly ordered and sterile Petrelli house.
The actual truth is that Nathan never taught Peter those types of games. Instead he taught Peter how to count cards, how to cheat at Candyland, and steal from the bank while playing Monopoly. And the actual truth is that Peter had been just like any other little boy, delighting in violence and destruction of all kinds.
Nathan never read Peter bedtime stories, but now he wishes that he had. There’s a story he hopes Peter would learn, but he thinks that now it’s far too late.
He knows exactly how the story reading would go. Peter would be in bed, but he wouldn’t be able to sit still and he would constantly interrupt Nathan with questions. He’d want to know the ‘why’s and the ‘how’s. He would bounce and fidget and Nathan would threaten to stop reading if Peter couldn’t keep still. Peter would look at him with wide, sincere eyes and promise to be good.
Nathan would tell him the story of Icarus, and how he fell. How King Minos thought Icarus’s father, Daedalus, was too smart to ever be allowed to leave his kingdom, so Minos had Daedalus and Icarus locked in a tower. And Minos searched every single boat, no matter how small, that left his island to make sure that Daedalus never escaped. Daedalus realized that since Minos controlled the land and the sea, the only way to leave was through the air, so he decided that the only way to escape was to built wings for himself and Icarus.
Icarus watched Daedalus make the wings, trying to help, but touching things he shouldn’t and getting in the way. When the wings were done, he taught Icarus how to fly, warning him that if he flew too low, the ocean spray would pull him down, and if he flew too high, the heat from the sun would melt the wax holding the wings together. He told Icarus that he if he stayed close, he would be safe, but Daedalus still worried and his hand shook as he fit the wings on Icarus’s shoulders and when he touched his face, it was wet with tears.
Daedalus took flight and checked back to make sure Icarus followed. All who saw them fly thought they were gods. Icarus, falling in love with flight, left Daedalus’s side and flew up towards the heavens and got too close to the sun. The heat softened the wax that held the feathers together, as Daedalus had warned it would, and Icarus fell into the sea.
Daedalus searched for Icarus, and finally seeing the feathers floating in the water, realized that Icarus was dead. Daedalus cursed his own genius, and arriving at his destination, hung up his wings, and never flew again
Peter would not be impressed with the story. He would frown and announce with certainty that Icarus was stupid. Nathan would agree. And then Peter would ask why Daedalus had let Icarus leave his side if he thought Icarus might fall. “They were both stupid!” Peter would declare, dismissing the story from his head and Nathan would have to agree.
But that never happened. Nathan never told Peter bedtime stories and Peter never learned, at least from Nathan, about Icarus, who didn’t listen to warnings and thought himself so invulnerable that he could touch the heavens and so crashed down to earth. And Peter never learned about Daedalus, who didn’t hold Icarus close enough and so lost him to the sea.
When Peter was fifteen, he was part of a group of boys who vandalized their school. They called it a protest, but no one had been clear about what exactly they had been protesting. Peter tried to explain it to Nathan. Peter used big words that he had only just learned and bigger hand gestures. Nathan didn’t paid attention. He just rolled his eyes and told Peter to shut up. Peter was furious at Nathan, but he let Nathan wipe a fleck of red paint from Peter’s cheek and sat sullenly while Nathan took care of everything. Their parents never heard anything about it.
The common perception was that Peter was a nice boy, sensitive and thoughtful. He was the boy all the parents wanted their daughters to date. The one they wanted their sons to be best friends with. The truth is that Peter was stubborn, spoiled, and possessed a dangerous earnestness that could convince anyone to follow him off a bridge or into bed.
The truth is that Nathan and Peter are far more alike than most people could ever imagine.
When Peter was born, people whispered that it was a surprise and their tone suggested that they thought it was most likely an unpleasant one. Out loud, they said that Peter was a gift for their parents, and that, at least, was almost the truth. Peter was a gift, though not for their parents, but for Nathan. It was one of the few things that Nathan had never once wavered on. Peter belonged to him
People have certain expectations of situations. They look at Nathan and then they look at Peter and they fill in the gaps. They remember stories from when they were young with castles and princes and quests. They notice that Nathan is the oldest. They see that he can be arrogant and cruel, and that he seems filled with ambition, willing to win at any cost. And they see Peter, the youngest, and he looks to be kind, patient, and understanding. He looks like he rescues kittens and always gives money to the homeless man who stands on the corner at the end of his block. It’s easy to label one the good son and one the bad.
Reality is much more complicated. Nathan taught Peter how to tie his shoes, how to hide the warning notes that came home from school, and how to sneak out of the house and never get caught. Nathan taught Peter all the state capitals and how to swear like he means it. He taught Peter how to drive fast, and all the important things that they never teach you in Sex Ed. Nathan gave Peter everything he had, and Peter took without question, knowing that whatever Nathan had to give was his by right.
Nathan made Peter in his own image, mixing in all Nathan’s hopes and regrets, creating something brighter than the original, but more fragile, and much easier to crack.
When Peter was nineteen, he came to Nathan, drunk and angry, begging Nathan to either let him go or take him completely. Nathan pretended not to know what Peter was talking about and gave Peter some water and aspirin and sent him to bed.
He sat by Peter’s bed, watching him toss and turn and mutter in his sleep. Nathan marveled at the fact that when he leaned over to brush Peter’s hair away from his forehead, Peter immediately stilled. And he pretended not to hear the way Peter moaned and reached towards him when Nathan let his lips brush against Peter’s cheek.
Sometimes when Nathan looks at Peter, all he sees are wings coming apart, feathers scattering in the wind and Peter falling someplace Nathan can’t go. Peter doesn’t really listen to Nathan anymore and if Nathan tried to teach Peter about flying, Peter wouldn’t listen to Nathan’s warning. He’d fly too low and then too high. He’d soar towards the heavens, leaving Nathan behind, and then he’d fall.
Somewhere there is a reality where everything happens the way Nathan wants. In this reality, Peter does what he’s told. He sits when Nathan tells him to sit and rolls over on command. And most importantly, he stays when he's told to stay. Peter listens to all of Nathan’s advice and works at Nathan’s side. In this reality, things had gone differently when Peter had made his drunken demands. In this reality, there are other things that Peter does when Nathan commands. When Nathan tells him to take off his clothes, he does. When Nathan tells him to get on the bed, he does that too. In the darkest corners of his mind, it’s the way Nathan thinks things should be. Except, certain things are true no matter what reality you are in. Things always fall apart no matter how hard you try to keep them together. Even in this reality, where Nathan can get so close to Peter that he’s actually inside him. They both fall apart. The feathers always come undone. Icarus always falls and Daedalus is always left weeping, never to fly again.
Truth is flexible and, for the most part, reality is something that you can take a piece of and twist to your own design. Peter is the perfect child, the one who unites the cowboys and Indians and never does anything wrong. He saves the cheerleader and always wins in the end. But he’s also just a boy, impulsive and flawed, a failed experiment and a broken toy.
Author: sparky77 (Q)
Pairing: Peter/Nathan
Rating: R
Spoilers: None
Notes: Written for muzivitch for the Peter/Nathan Spring Hiatus Fic-a-thon. My prompt was Part of Nathan wishes that Peter would grow up and realize how the world. I kind of took the prompt and then made a right turn and then I think maybe jumped off a cliff. This is on the dark side which I apologize for and I will totally write something happy to make up for it. Huge thanks to linaerys for organizing the ficathon and finitejester37 for putting up with me and the awesome beta job.
***The story of Icarus that Nathan tells Peter is mostly based on Bulfinch's version along with bits and pieces of other versions of the story and my own embellishments.
There is a story that Nathan likes to tell about Peter. It’s not true, but he’s told the story so many times that he thinks even Peter believes it to be true.
In the story, Nathan tries to teach Peter how to play Cowboys and Indians, but Peter has a long talk with the Cowboys about understanding other cultures and he persuades the Indians to sign a peace treaty. Next, Nathan tries to teach Peter how to play Cops and Robbers, but the cops learn about victims’ rights and the robbers all reform and find constructive ways to contribute to society.
Details are important when telling a convincing story, so Nathan makes sure to mention the way Peter had looked wearing a cowboy hat that was far too big for him. He carefully describes how Peter had looked so serious, the cowboy hat perched precariously on his head, one sudden movement from tipping down and covering half his face, biting his lip and frowning while trying to make the world a better place for all the imaginary cops, robbers, cowboys, and Indians.
Everyone loves that story. They laugh, or at least smile politely, because it sounds like something Peter would have done as a child. It sounds true and that’s enough. No one ever wonders where Peter found a cowboy hat in the perfectly ordered and sterile Petrelli house.
The actual truth is that Nathan never taught Peter those types of games. Instead he taught Peter how to count cards, how to cheat at Candyland, and steal from the bank while playing Monopoly. And the actual truth is that Peter had been just like any other little boy, delighting in violence and destruction of all kinds.
Nathan never read Peter bedtime stories, but now he wishes that he had. There’s a story he hopes Peter would learn, but he thinks that now it’s far too late.
He knows exactly how the story reading would go. Peter would be in bed, but he wouldn’t be able to sit still and he would constantly interrupt Nathan with questions. He’d want to know the ‘why’s and the ‘how’s. He would bounce and fidget and Nathan would threaten to stop reading if Peter couldn’t keep still. Peter would look at him with wide, sincere eyes and promise to be good.
Nathan would tell him the story of Icarus, and how he fell. How King Minos thought Icarus’s father, Daedalus, was too smart to ever be allowed to leave his kingdom, so Minos had Daedalus and Icarus locked in a tower. And Minos searched every single boat, no matter how small, that left his island to make sure that Daedalus never escaped. Daedalus realized that since Minos controlled the land and the sea, the only way to leave was through the air, so he decided that the only way to escape was to built wings for himself and Icarus.
Icarus watched Daedalus make the wings, trying to help, but touching things he shouldn’t and getting in the way. When the wings were done, he taught Icarus how to fly, warning him that if he flew too low, the ocean spray would pull him down, and if he flew too high, the heat from the sun would melt the wax holding the wings together. He told Icarus that he if he stayed close, he would be safe, but Daedalus still worried and his hand shook as he fit the wings on Icarus’s shoulders and when he touched his face, it was wet with tears.
Daedalus took flight and checked back to make sure Icarus followed. All who saw them fly thought they were gods. Icarus, falling in love with flight, left Daedalus’s side and flew up towards the heavens and got too close to the sun. The heat softened the wax that held the feathers together, as Daedalus had warned it would, and Icarus fell into the sea.
Daedalus searched for Icarus, and finally seeing the feathers floating in the water, realized that Icarus was dead. Daedalus cursed his own genius, and arriving at his destination, hung up his wings, and never flew again
Peter would not be impressed with the story. He would frown and announce with certainty that Icarus was stupid. Nathan would agree. And then Peter would ask why Daedalus had let Icarus leave his side if he thought Icarus might fall. “They were both stupid!” Peter would declare, dismissing the story from his head and Nathan would have to agree.
But that never happened. Nathan never told Peter bedtime stories and Peter never learned, at least from Nathan, about Icarus, who didn’t listen to warnings and thought himself so invulnerable that he could touch the heavens and so crashed down to earth. And Peter never learned about Daedalus, who didn’t hold Icarus close enough and so lost him to the sea.
When Peter was fifteen, he was part of a group of boys who vandalized their school. They called it a protest, but no one had been clear about what exactly they had been protesting. Peter tried to explain it to Nathan. Peter used big words that he had only just learned and bigger hand gestures. Nathan didn’t paid attention. He just rolled his eyes and told Peter to shut up. Peter was furious at Nathan, but he let Nathan wipe a fleck of red paint from Peter’s cheek and sat sullenly while Nathan took care of everything. Their parents never heard anything about it.
The common perception was that Peter was a nice boy, sensitive and thoughtful. He was the boy all the parents wanted their daughters to date. The one they wanted their sons to be best friends with. The truth is that Peter was stubborn, spoiled, and possessed a dangerous earnestness that could convince anyone to follow him off a bridge or into bed.
The truth is that Nathan and Peter are far more alike than most people could ever imagine.
When Peter was born, people whispered that it was a surprise and their tone suggested that they thought it was most likely an unpleasant one. Out loud, they said that Peter was a gift for their parents, and that, at least, was almost the truth. Peter was a gift, though not for their parents, but for Nathan. It was one of the few things that Nathan had never once wavered on. Peter belonged to him
People have certain expectations of situations. They look at Nathan and then they look at Peter and they fill in the gaps. They remember stories from when they were young with castles and princes and quests. They notice that Nathan is the oldest. They see that he can be arrogant and cruel, and that he seems filled with ambition, willing to win at any cost. And they see Peter, the youngest, and he looks to be kind, patient, and understanding. He looks like he rescues kittens and always gives money to the homeless man who stands on the corner at the end of his block. It’s easy to label one the good son and one the bad.
Reality is much more complicated. Nathan taught Peter how to tie his shoes, how to hide the warning notes that came home from school, and how to sneak out of the house and never get caught. Nathan taught Peter all the state capitals and how to swear like he means it. He taught Peter how to drive fast, and all the important things that they never teach you in Sex Ed. Nathan gave Peter everything he had, and Peter took without question, knowing that whatever Nathan had to give was his by right.
Nathan made Peter in his own image, mixing in all Nathan’s hopes and regrets, creating something brighter than the original, but more fragile, and much easier to crack.
When Peter was nineteen, he came to Nathan, drunk and angry, begging Nathan to either let him go or take him completely. Nathan pretended not to know what Peter was talking about and gave Peter some water and aspirin and sent him to bed.
He sat by Peter’s bed, watching him toss and turn and mutter in his sleep. Nathan marveled at the fact that when he leaned over to brush Peter’s hair away from his forehead, Peter immediately stilled. And he pretended not to hear the way Peter moaned and reached towards him when Nathan let his lips brush against Peter’s cheek.
Sometimes when Nathan looks at Peter, all he sees are wings coming apart, feathers scattering in the wind and Peter falling someplace Nathan can’t go. Peter doesn’t really listen to Nathan anymore and if Nathan tried to teach Peter about flying, Peter wouldn’t listen to Nathan’s warning. He’d fly too low and then too high. He’d soar towards the heavens, leaving Nathan behind, and then he’d fall.
Somewhere there is a reality where everything happens the way Nathan wants. In this reality, Peter does what he’s told. He sits when Nathan tells him to sit and rolls over on command. And most importantly, he stays when he's told to stay. Peter listens to all of Nathan’s advice and works at Nathan’s side. In this reality, things had gone differently when Peter had made his drunken demands. In this reality, there are other things that Peter does when Nathan commands. When Nathan tells him to take off his clothes, he does. When Nathan tells him to get on the bed, he does that too. In the darkest corners of his mind, it’s the way Nathan thinks things should be. Except, certain things are true no matter what reality you are in. Things always fall apart no matter how hard you try to keep them together. Even in this reality, where Nathan can get so close to Peter that he’s actually inside him. They both fall apart. The feathers always come undone. Icarus always falls and Daedalus is always left weeping, never to fly again.
Truth is flexible and, for the most part, reality is something that you can take a piece of and twist to your own design. Peter is the perfect child, the one who unites the cowboys and Indians and never does anything wrong. He saves the cheerleader and always wins in the end. But he’s also just a boy, impulsive and flawed, a failed experiment and a broken toy.